Ed knew he had to apologize - he lied to Naria anyway, he lied to all his friends who cared about him and made them worry...... Even though he felt it was the right decision.

Even if he was given a chance to do it all over again, he would still do it, but with a little more caution so as not to be discovered.

He found Naria in the kitchen. The girl sat there sulking, and Hanrietta, who was busy on the side, thoughtfully left with a basket of potatoes when she saw Ed coming in, and gave him a meaningful smile, but he had no intention of replying.

"Apologies" are a common thing for him. He apologized to Narya countless times, whether it was his fault or not...... But this time it was particularly difficult. He didn't know if Narya could see through his duplicity at a glance, because the girl just looked at him coldly from beginning to end, which made him feel more and more weak.

He would rather have her reprimand him as bluntly as she had done before, or simply slap him firmly on the back of the head, rather than say nothing so coldly and completely overwhelmed him, and her voice fell a little low, until it disappeared.

They sat facing each other in silence, but they seemed farther away from each other than he was in the distant ice field, and even more so when she was in Ston Butch.

"I'm not...... ...... who wanted to lie to you" After a while, Ed, who had not received any response, could only repeat with a sad face, "I'm not sure what the danger will be, and I don't want anyone to get involved in the trouble I've created again......"

"yes, you're just trying to protect me—and Alan always says that. Naria twisted her face to the side. It didn't seem like he even wanted to look at him again.

Ed quieted down, a hint of anger involuntarily growing in his heart. That's because of the embarrassment of being exposed, but also because of ...... He thought Narya would understand.

The place where his back was stiff was the old storage room, which had been sealed...... Where Vala died. Time faded away from something. But he will never forget the despair and sorrow of that moment.

He never wanted anyone he cared about to suffer the same fate again.

"I know you've never liked that, but Alan might be right!" he snapped, "why can't you get it?"

Naria slammed to her feet, her hands propped on the table, glaring at him angrily.

Ed unconsciously flinched back, thinking that Naria would probably jump over and punch him...... But the anger in the girl's eyes receded like a tide, and the frustration and loss revealed like a reef hidden beneath the water's surface.

“...... You're right. She lowered her head, her expression gloomy. "I can't help much anyway. ”

Ed's eyes widened in bewilderment, vaguely sensing that Naria's anger didn't seem entirely due to him having lied to her.

"I didn't...... What does that mean......" he stammered trying to explain. But the girl kept shaking her head, as if refusing to listen.

"I'm going to prepare dinner. She said, even reluctantly smiling, "That's at least what I can do well." ”

Ed watched her leave in a daze. Not a word can be said - and. This is the kitchen...... Where is she going to prepare dinner?

After a few moments, Alan came in through the side door and looked at Ed in silence

Ed didn't know how long he had been standing there, but he looked like he had heard everything.

"It's not that 'lying' is a good thing......," Alan began, "but she's kind of angry with herself—she thinks she's useless, and you seem to prove that even more so when you lie to her." ”

"But I've never thought of it that way......" Ed couldn't help but feel a little aggrieved.

Alan sighed: "Sometimes I don't think there's anything wrong with that...... She would no longer run around with a sword in her hand, dealing with things that I might not have dared to face when I was younger...... Sometimes I'd rather her slash the dead with all her spirit than see her sitting listlessly. ”

Ed kept his mouth shut. Realize that the old man doesn't really need him to answer.

“...... At the end of the day, it's up to her to decide which path she chooses. The old man smiled helplessly. Glancing nonchalantly at Ed, "But...... You're getting more and more like Scott. ”

Ed pointed at himself suspiciously, wondering if he had misheard something - no one had ever said that, and he didn't feel at all like Scott, who was completely different in character or appearance.

"yes, I used to think you were completely different. Alan smiled at him, "But now it seems that maybe the blood of the Chrissus family is too strong...... Scott couldn't help but want to keep everyone behind him, especially the people he cared about - sometimes I think it was because he felt he hadn't been able to protect his parents. ”

"That'...... Is there something wrong?" Ed asked hesitantly.

It seemed to him that it was a matter of course...... Even if he doesn't have enough strength to protect everyone, at least he has to do his best to protect his loved ones.

Alan shook his head, "There's nothing wrong with it - but he never cares if those people need his protection, if they prefer to fight alongside him, rather than just hiding behind him without knowing anything...... It had taken me a long time to make him understand that if he was always desperate to rush forward and take all the dangers alone, he might put his companion in danger. But he came back from the dead, possessing unimaginably powerful powers, but he seems to have forgotten about it. He was like a dragon trying to hide all his treasures deep in a cave and leave no one to touch them...... That's brave, but it's also selfish, even stupid...... I think you know better than anyone why Iss left, and is that really something that can't be changed, can't be stopped?"

Ed bowed his head weakly. Alan had always been well-informed, and he wasn't sure how much he knew...... Will he even know about Oylan?

"I don't have any position to accuse you or Scott, after all, I don't do the same thing. Alan smiled wryly, "That's why Nalya hates people she trusts so much for lying to her." If I could do it all over again, I'd probably still be hiding a lot from her, but maybe there's no other way, a better way...... And I thought you could do what we couldn't. ”

Ed stammered, speechless. He didn't know that Alan would expect this from him...... He didn't see anything to look forward to.

And Alan obviously didn't intend to give him an answer either. As the sound of his footsteps faded away, Ed sat still, in a state of confusion that he had never really shaken off.

Now he knows he's not the only one who will lose his bearings...... But that didn't comfort him.

Where did their unwavering faith go, when they decided to go on a journey to find an "evil" dragon in the face of almost all opposition and stubbornly believe they could bring him home? Was the courage of that time only because they had never really faced the darkness head-on? Did they go through so much only to become more cowardly and hypocritical?

What the hell did they lose on the road?.

Later in the day, Ed lingered outside Naria's room, hesitating to knock on the door. He didn't know exactly what to do, he just thought...... He should at least let Narya know that he could understand her confusion and that she didn't have to face it alone.

“...... Tess dragged her to the forest. The elf's voice sounded behind him, "If fresh mushrooms appear in the dinner, it is recommended that you do not eat too much." ”

Ed turned his head, barely squeezing out a smile.

He knew that Norway wouldn't blame him for anything. The elf, who has lived for hundreds of years, is tolerant and gentle, and he will always forgive him...... But it only made him feel more guilty.

"I'm sorry...... I messed up, didn't I?" he hung his head, "I didn't want to disappoint you guys as soon as I came back......"

The elf smiled and shook his head: "What I want to make Narya angry is not disappointment, but worry...... But I do have some disappointment in myself. ”

Ed looked at him in surprise, unable to understand the words.

"Am I no longer worthy of your trust?" asked Norway earnestly, "because it seems so." ”

“...... No, no, no, no!" Frightened Ed shook his head desperately, "There will never be such a thing!You will always be my most trusted friend, the bravest and most powerful elf I have ever known!, only, only...... I just don't want you guys to get in any more trouble because of me......"

"I understand. Norway patted him on the shoulder soothingly, "But for the elves...... That also means that you don't believe that I am capable enough to protect myself and capable enough to help you...... Or be wise enough to decide whether you should be involved, or stay out of the way—is that so?"

Ed turned pale and shook his head at every word he said, almost wanting to kneel on the ground and swear to his chest.

"That being the case. The elf narrowed his eyes slightly, "What is it that makes you feel like you can't speak to me?"

Ed stopped shaking his head, looking dizzily into his green eyes. He never thought to use words like "cunning" to describe Novi...... But at that moment, he clearly felt the chagrin of being calculated and the unexpected relief.

So, what the hell is he struggling with? Two years ago he was even more useless than he is now, and he was even jokingly called the "money bag" by Tess. He was well aware of his limitations, but he believed in his friends, and he believed that together they could solve all problems......

When was he blinded by his own "power" and turned a blind eye to the power he really possessed? .

(To be continued......)