The dawn of dawn emerged from the top of the hump. Overnight, the dazzling silver armor of Hump Mountain was swept away by a blizzard to some corner of the world, revealing a craggy gray rocky peak. Halfway up the hill to the north, the snow pushed together by the blizzard showed a wave-like layered cascade along the slope, like a giant's garment wrapped around his waist. "Coordinate No. 6" is still erected so straight, and this three-dimensional guide of the earth has been evaporated by countless snowstorms and storms, and the water representing life in the body has been evaporated, and a tree has become a withered pole. In the wasteland, there were piles of snowdrifts by the ghosts, small like graves, large like mounds. The sun also rose reservedly from behind the Hump Mountain, and stopped at the top of the Hump Mountain for a moment, as if it was elastic, and with a slight jump, it hung in mid-air. The earth was shining with a brilliant glow, and the snow shone with a soft glow of jewel-like red.

In the regimental headquarters area, piles of bonfires have been extinguished, but there is still curling green smoke. The fresh and chilly air of the winter morning is filled with the special smell of burning pine resin. More than a dozen wagons, trailers, tractors, parked everywhere they wanted. The horses that had not been unloaded last night were covered with frost, like silver-armored horses on the ancient battlefield, licking the snow and eating the dead grass under the snow like pigs.

On a flat field of snow, tarpaulin covered the supplies that had been snatched from the fire. Buckets, poles, shovels, and pickaxes are neatly stacked.

At this moment, the young intellectuals are all gathered in the cadre unit, the organization unit, and the financial unit...... Handle the formalities of returning to the city in a disciplined manner. Only the conference room was empty, the doors were open, and the convective wind swept through the room, scraping cigarette ashes, cigarette butts, cigarette cases, and newspapers all over the floor. The little civil servant is cleaning alone. He was performing his last duties, and he had completed the formalities of returning to the city.

In the auditorium, on the stage, there are two tables, stacks of archives that will change their personified values over the past decade. What they will record in the future will be determined by the fate of the young intellectuals after they return to the city.

The head of the military affairs unit sat solemnly behind a desk. Here, the young intellectuals go through the final formality of returning to the city – to collect their files. He had to stamp their sealed file bags and relocation cards for the last time he would perform his duties for them.

When he saw that there were many people, he stood up and said in a loud voice, "Now, I will go to work." First of all, you must be divided into two rows, as I have requested. So saying, he came down from the side stairs, walked among them, pointed to them, and said, "Stand on the left." You, stand to the right. You, on the left. You, on the left. You...... I go to the left, too. You, right. Left, Left, Right......"

They were quickly divided into two rows by him, one with more people and the other with fewer people. He looked around at the two rows of people and said, "The left row has priority." He put the word "priority" in a big way. With that, he turned around and strode towards the stage. "What do you mean by that? Is there one who came first and then came? I've been waiting here for you for a long time. "Someone in the right row shouted. "Yes! "Don't think that if you hold the official seal in your hand, you can act arbitrarily......!" The people in the right row chimed in, protested, and even threatened. The military chief stood on the side stairs of the stage, turned slowly, stared at the right row, and said in a cold tone: "Keep your eyes open, look at everyone in the left row, and then look at each other!"

The men in the right row cast their suspicious and indignant gazes on the left row - their faces were all black and dirty. There are also scars. Their trousers and shoes were hung with ice that had frozen after getting wet. Their clothes are full of burnt holes here and there...... They all looked so embarrassed.

The people in the right row, one by one, seemed more embarrassed than the people in the left row, and they understood at each other that they had not put out the fire last night.

It's a contrasting permutation. Brothers, sisters, good friends, and young intellectuals who were in the same class, row, and company, and who had various relationships with each other were separated by this arrangement and combination. The people in the right row are not allowed to stand in the left row, and the people in the left row will never want to stand in the right row, they can only look face to face.

In the midst of this silent and continuous look-at-you-go, the head of the unit stood on the stage and said loudly: "I ask you to remain quiet. If anyone yells, I propose you, just blast him out!" he sat down at his office, picked up a card, and read word by word: "Continuous...... Li Qingfeng ......, "The people in the right row, no one can stand the loneliness of waiting and the gaze of the left row, and they have exited the auditorium one after another. When they exited, everyone lowered their heads and looked ashamed.

The people in the left row, they maintain a long-lasting, almost ** silence. Even the coughing sound was controlled, and no one was talking. Whether they are familiar or unfamiliar, they express a faint respect and ...... with their eyes to each other Glad. At this moment, how could they not feel great relief that their spontaneous firefighting operation last night had received such a special form of attention? As soon as someone entered the auditorium, they cast their eyes on that person. If there is a resemblance to them in him or her, they will nod their heads and gesture for him or her to come in line. If his or her face is not dark and his or her clothes are intact, their gaze is unbearable for him or her to look at it squarely. That gaze is extremely complex, with questioning, condemnation, lamentation, and even sympathy.

If he or she is not sluggish, he or she will realize something and withdraw ashamedly.

The little bricklayer standing in the queue looked at the happy appearance of those who had received the quasi-relocation cards and files, and a faint melancholy and dissatisfaction arose in his heart. He thinks they shouldn't leave like this, how should they?...... He himself didn't know.

He felt that he needed to talk to others, and he would feel more relaxed about what he could talk about. So, he asked a young man beside him, "Which company are you?"

"Three-in-a-row. The other party seems to have the same needs as him.

"You guys are ...... They're all gone?"

The other party nodded affirmatively: "Clerk, accountant, hygienist, elementary school teacher...... More than 30 young intellectuals, one pot served. ”

"What year?"

"I've been six or eight years. June 18 is the Great Northern Wilderness that '618' indicates that day. We asked the team leader, Chairman Mao's instructions to the Corps were only conveyed, how could you have flaunted the banner of the Corps when we were propaganda and mobilization more than a month in advance? The team leader replied: 'Propaganda is for the purpose?' He was not afraid of being accused of fabricating the chairman's instructions!

"Then you are the first batch to go to the Great Northern Wilderness?"

"Of course. Our group of educated youth veterans in the Great Northern Wilderness all signed up voluntarily. I kept it a secret from my parents until the day before I left. My mother was crying in the dark, but I was gone...... I am an only child. Later, I couldn't go back to the city even if I wanted to. What about you? What year?"

"Seventy-one years. ”

"The year of 'a piece of red'?"

"Yes, my mother was paralyzed in bed at the time, and the people from the mobilization group in the countryside were beating gongs and drums to deliver glorious flowers to our house one day. I said to my brother, 'We didn't sign up!' and they said, 'We didn't sign up!'"

"'A piece of red', 'a piece of red', from the city to the clean, but also from the Great Northern Wilderness...... More than 400,000! I wonder how many will remain?"

"I can't believe that we will leave like this. Let's not talk about anything else, take our regiment as an example, 90 percent of the agricultural machinery and implements in the regiment are young intellectuals, and they are all gone, and I am afraid that we will not even be able to sow wheat and soybeans in the spring of this year...... If you think about it, I really feel a little sorry for the Great Northern Wilderness!"

"Yes, the political commissar also said that he was going to give us a farewell party, but I think it's better not to hold it. ”

The little bricklayer suddenly saw his younger brother enter the auditorium, and the younger brother was wearing a military coat, which was too fat and too long, and the younger brother was too inappropriate to wear. The face, the younger brother's face - is clean. Why is it clean?!why not dirty?!

The gaze of himself, all these people with filthy faces on their faces, was projected on his brother. The little bricklayer felt very sorry for his brother, and he turned around. But his brother had already discovered him. The younger brother ignored the gazes cast on him. The younger brother walked up to him, walked up to him and stopped, and called softly: "Brother......" Everyone looked at the two brothers silently. The little bricklayer turned sharply and yelled, "Don't call me brother!" the younger brother glared at him in surprise. "You...... You're not my brother, get out of here!" "I'm ......" "I'll beat you!" The little bricklayer grabbed the collar of the military coat he was wearing on his brother.

The young man he had just spoken to put his arm around his fist. He gave him a hard push, and his brother fell to the ground. The young man stepped forward to help his younger brother, glanced at his elder brother, and said to his younger brother, "Those who go through the formalities now have all put out the fire last night." You...... Come back later. ”

The younger brother's eyes stared at the elder brother, and with one hand, one by one, he unbuttoned the military coat. The fat military coat fell from the thin and narrow shoulders of the younger brother to the ground. The younger brother has completely changed into a different look, the surface of the cotton jacket and the cotton are almost burned out, and all he wears on his body is a torn cotton jacket. Trousers, burned above the knee like a padded jacket, a foreskin wire in the trousers, barely hanging the padded pants on the belt......

The little bricklayer froze. Everyone was stunned.

The younger brother's eyes staring at his brother gradually filled with tears of grievance.

The head of the military affairs unit stopped working at some point, stepped down from the stage, and walked to his younger brother's side. He picked up the military coat, patted off the dust, and gently draped it on his younger brother's shoulder, saying, "This is the coat of the commander of the horse, right?"

The younger brother nodded and muttered, "He ordered me to wear it." ”

"Get dressed, don't freeze. The head of the military affairs put his hand on his brother's shoulder, but looked at the elder brother reproachfully.

The little bricklayer went up to his brother and, like a child, put the general's coat on his brother, and buttoned it for him.

"Come with me, I'll take care of the formalities for you now. The chief took one of his brother's hands and walked onto the stage with him......

In the party committee office, political commissar Sun Guotai turned his back to Cao Tieqiang and Zheng Yaru, and said in a very low and heavy tone: "You can go......"

Overnight, he had aged so much! his eyes were bloodshot, and every wrinkle on his face deepened.

Grief is like a pair of invisible hands, squeezing the heart of his veterans who have been very strong during the war years and in the arduous period of agricultural reclamation.

Many people have sacrificed their lives for the development and construction of the Great Northern Wilderness. Some of these people's names he still remembers, and some of them he has forgotten. There are more than two intellectual youths who bury their bodies in the land of the Great Northern Wilderness. But the death of two intellectual youths last night caused in his soul a grief mixed with guilt.

They're dead. A girl from Shanghai and a young man from Harbin. One is thirty-one years old. One is twenty-five years old. One, not yet married, not yet in time to be a wife, and maybe even - not yet in love. He guessed. The other, leaving behind his young wife, and her unborn son, perhaps a daughter, in her womb. One, who had just been discussed and approved by the regimental branch of the company as a member of the Communist Youth League. But for some reason, the regiment has not officially approved it. In their view, the approval of a Communist Youth League member seems to be stricter than the approval of a member of the Central Committee! While the other one, who urgently wants to join the party organization and did not become a member of the Communist Party of China during his lifetime, is only because of his own casual remark: "For the question of an intellectual young man like Liu Mike joining the party, the examination should be strict and the test should be long." ”

In one sentence, the report on the development of party members submitted by the party branch of the engineering company to the regiment three times was suppressed by the head of the regiment organization unit for a long time...... His prejudice against the regimental guard platoon commander in those years was so deep! It was so difficult to change before today......

Who will be held responsible for their deaths? Is it the blizzard? Or is it the chaos of last night? Is it the regiment commander Ma Chonghan? Or is it their company commander and instructor? Or is it ...... Himself. As a political commissar, he felt that he had a responsibility that he could not shirk. Liability...... Even if every living person is willing to bear any responsibility, even punishment, they ...... Lives were lost.

One died ...... Tragic, one died ......**. One died ...... Hero, one dies ...... Sacred. The death of one was exchanged for a visible price, and the death of one sublimated the title of a soldier of the Corps......

Cao Tieqiang and Zheng Yaru walked into the party committee office together without saying a word. The deaths of Mike Liu and Pei Xiaoyun made his heart numb from grief. It was Zheng Yaru who answered all the questions raised by the political commissar. The commissar asked, and she replied.

Seeing that the political commissar didn't ask anything anymore, Zheng Yaru slowly stood up and walked outside. She walked to the door, stood still, and suddenly threw herself on the doorframe, and burst into tears. The old commissar walked up to her and whispered, "Be strong." Zheng Yaru suddenly pounced on Cao Tieqiang, knelt on her knees, and cried bitterly: "I'm guilty! I leaked the content of the meeting, and I caused the chaos." Mike Liu's death was caused by me. Pei Xiaoyun's death was also caused by me......! I didn't appoint someone to change her post...... I ......" She suddenly jumped up and rushed out of the party committee office like crazy.

Cao Tieqiang suddenly fell on the table, his forehead against the table, and his fists kept pounding the table. Soon, a ** erupted with his cry. "I ...... Why didn't I tell her plainly and clearly a day earlier...... I...... It's the ...... who loves her" This sentence seemed to burst out of his broken heart, with the blood of the wound of the soul.

Only then did the old political commissar truly understand that the grief of the young company commander of the knowledge was far greater than he had expected! However, he could not find a word to comfort the young man and make him cry bitterly!

He walked out of the party committee office and stood outside the door. Tears flowed from his eyes and overflowed into the deep wrinkles on his face. Seeing two cadres of the Youth League Committee walking towards him from afar, he took out a handkerchief and wiped his eyes.

"Commissar, did you send someone to find us?" they asked in a low voice as they walked up to him, showing that they had not lost their respect for him. He asked, "Are you done with your return to the city?" and "It's done!" and they replied in a low voice, as if he were asking about a certain job. He narrowed his eyes, stared at them for a moment, and said very calmly: "Now that you have completed the formalities for returning to the city, then I have reason now to announce that you are relieved of all your posts as the organizer of the Communist Youth League. They looked at each other, thinking that the commissar had brought them in order to announce it to them in person. They turned slowly, each with mixed feelings about to leave. "Wait a minute. The commissar stopped them. The old political commissar also said: "In the name of the Communist Youth League Party Committee, I order you to approve Pei Xiaoyun, an intellectual youth from Shanghai, who is a member of the Communist Youth League, before formally handing over the organizational work of the Communist Youth League. The two Komsomol cadres looked at each other again and nodded at the same time. "I'm not done yet. When they were about to leave for the second time, the old political commissar stopped them again and said: "I ask you to approve all the letters of induction of young intellectuals that have been approved by the regimental branch of this company before handing over the work, and handle the organizational relations on their behalf, and hand them over to themselves, without any mistakes!"

......

Some of the educated youths who had gone through the last formalities of returning to the city couldn't wait to rush back to the company as soon as they got the files and the relocation card. They need to plan all kinds of preparations for their return to the city. Many more did not return to the company and remained at the regimental headquarters, and they had to wait for a farewell party, because this was what the old commissar had said. They don't want to hold a grand and spectacular farewell party for them, they just hope that before leaving the Great Northern Wilderness, someone can say something to them on behalf of the Great Northern Wilderness. Each of them really wanted to go through a ritual, even the simplest one, to collectively bid farewell to the Great Northern Wilderness. Whether there is such a ritual or not, for them, it does not matter.

At this moment, they have a heartfelt nostalgia for the Great Northern Wilderness. Or to put it another way, they are sincere nostalgia for their youth, their enthusiasm for those years, their sweat and labor, and their most precious life that has passed away forever.

What a contradiction to be nostalgic but to leave! But this is the reflection of the contradictions of the times in a generation, ideologically and psychologically. Who can't objectively analyze the contradictions of the era we have passed, and can't draw correct conclusions, they can't understand their complicated feelings when they are about to leave the Great Northern Wilderness, and they can't understand their nostalgia for the Great Northern Wilderness.

Except for a few people in the engineering company, they didn't know that just last night, two young intellectuals had been put to rest......

At nine o'clock, the loudspeaker of the regiment headquarters sounded the sound of a rallying horn. The various companies lined up in the square outside the auditorium.

The door to the auditorium slowly opened from the inside.

As soon as they entered the auditorium, they were stunned. The first thing that caught their eyes was a banner -- intellectual youths Liu Mike and Pei Xiaoyun stood solemnly on the stage wearing black veils on their arms. He looked at everyone with eyes full of emotion, and then spoke for a long time: "Soldiers, this is the last time I will address you like this! I believe that in the future, in many years and on many occasions, this title will be mentioned many times by yourselves and by others. This is a title that you should be proud of, and it is also a title that deserves the respect of your contemporaries and future generations who have not shared your experience. Although you are about to leave the Great Northern Wilderness, and the history of the Production and Construction Corps is over, the achievements in developing and building the frontier have not ended, nor will they end! On behalf of the Great Northern Wilderness, I want to say to you loudly, thank you, the soldiers of the Corps! Because you have left the footprints of the reclamation people on the land of the Great Northern Wilderness! Because you have laid down millions of tons of grain in the past 10 years! Because you are going back to the city today, not to the other side of the Heilongjiang River! I believe that in the future, in the big cities of the country, when the society comments on the best young people of your generation, they will say something like this: 'They once lived in the Great Northern Wilderness!'"

Countless pairs of eyes, unblinking, staring at the old commissar.

The old commissar was so excited!

He continued: "I promised you yesterday that I would have a farewell party for you. I sincerely think that I want to send you off the Great Northern Wilderness with gongs and drums, just like you were welcomed to the Great Northern Wilderness. You have meritorious deeds, although this merit may not necessarily be written down in history, but it will be fairly recognized by history! In the past ten years, many young intellectuals have sacrificed their lives for the Great Northern Wilderness. Just last night, two of you, two young intellectuals, two of your comrades-in-arms...... Remember their names forever! Their names are ...... Mike Liu...... Pei Xiaoyun...... The Great Northern Wilderness will always miss them......"

The old commissar drooped his gray-haired head.

All the people hung their heads.

Mournful music was heard from the loudspeakers.

Cao Tieqiang, the small bricklayer, and the two soldiers of the engineering company, carrying the bodies of their comrades-in-arms in the corps covered with white cloth, slowly walked into the auditorium from the outside, walked onto the stage, and gently laid the bodies of their comrades-in-arms on the table. Put it so lightly, as if it was afraid of waking them up from sleep.

"Everyone, say goodbye to the martyrs!"

As soon as the old commissar's words fell, someone immediately broke out and cried. The cry rang out!

In recent years, these young intellectuals have wept bitterly for the leader, for the beloved Premier Zhou, for Chairman Zhu, and for the death of many revolutionaries of the older generation. Today, for the sake of the two intellectual youths and the two comrades-in-arms of the Corps, they wept bitterly again......

The funeral procession of hundreds of people, not wearing black veils, not wearing white flowers, and not even carrying a wreath, set off from the auditorium, along the Tuanbu Avenue, and slowly walked towards Hump Mountain.

The pickaxe cut through the frozen iron-hard soil, and a shovel passed through the hands of hundreds of people. The soil of the Great Northern Wilderness buried two intellectual youths. On the land of the Great Northern Wilderness, it was piled up again, and it also left behind the new graves of two intellectual youths.

Platoon guns rang out three times.

This is the burial ceremony of the soldiers of the engineering company, in accordance with the words of the company commander Cao Tieqiang. Pei Xiaoyun, a Shanghai girl who had just been approved as a soldier of the combat readiness detachment, had not had a chance to let go of a shot before her death. The sound of a row of gunfire shook the sky, and three echoes echoed between the valleys of the hump, circling the peaks, and continuing for a long time.

Like a black arrow shot from a sentry post halfway up the mountain, it was the "Black Panther......

Zheng Yaru did not participate in the burial, she did not have the courage. She came alone to the Shijin River and sat under a large willow tree with a twisted trunk. Her mind is messed up. The quasi-migration card and file bag are placed in the school bag, and the school bag is carried on the body. But when she returned to the city and stayed in the Great Northern Wilderness, she was full of contradictions and hesitated. And the time allowed her to make a choice was so short, so urgent.

It's quiet here. Every time she comes to the regiment for a meeting or to participate in a cadre training class, she likes to come here alone whenever she has time to spend a little spare time, no matter winter, summer, spring and autumn. The old willow tree was adorned with hangings before last night, like a huge silver coral. The frozen river was as smooth as a mirror before the blizzard. It's a place that you won't want to leave. However, a blizzard destroyed the beauty of the place overnight. The branches of the old willow trees were bare like ugly porcupines, and the river was covered with a desolate thick snow. Looking at the camel mountain, which has shed a layer of skin, she is so at a loss about the path she wants to take in life in the future.

She understood that she was at a crossroads.

Before last night, she was confident in her life's path. She is one of only three female intellectuals in the regiment who have been promoted to the post of a regular cadre, and she is the only member of the party committee of the intellectuals youth league. She was ranked first in the list of young cadres at the regimental level. Although, like many intellectual youths, she can't help but feel attached to the city and urban life from time to time. But more often than not, she suppresses this attachment and does not reveal it anytime and anywhere like others. She didn't, she never did, she didn't allow herself to do that. After thinking about all kinds of ways and goings to leave the corps, comparing them, and secretly trying, she gave up the idea of returning to the city. As long as you cultivate silently, there will always be a harvest, she believes that. Who knew that in 10 years, she would not become the political commissar of the women's regiment of the Production and Construction Corps, or even the political commissar of the female division? At that time, she was only middle-aged. What about another 10 years? When she is 50 years old? The leaders of the headquarters of the Production and Construction Corps are at the ministerial level and at the level of a large military region. Everything is not a dream, nothing is impossible. Everything can only be achieved if you stay in the Corps and stay in the Great Northern Wilderness. No city can create such conditions and provide such opportunities for a young woman of 29 years old. But suddenly, she, like all intellectual youths, was pushed to the crossroads of going and staying. She didn't have time to think about it at all, so she made the latter choice, and it can even be said that it could not be regarded as a choice, but just a blind attachment that she couldn't help herself. Do you regret it? Maybe, yes. After returning to the city, what difference will there be between her and the more than 800 young intellectuals in the whole regiment and the fate of thousands, tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, millions, and tens of millions of young intellectuals across the country? Will the city embrace her with open arms like a long-lost lover? Unemployed and temporary workers...... Will she be able to endure this calmly? Yes, her parents will arrange for her a more desirable career as soon as possible, and in this respect she may be luckier than other intellectual youths. What about the future? Marriage, childbirth, good wives and mothers, and advanced producers. All kinds of honors and capital in the Great Northern Wilderness will be outdated records. Everything has to start again from a new starting line. She was tired of this kind of competition in life. She's been racing for 10 years...... What's more, she is twenty-nine years old, an old girl. The city will never be affectionate for a twenty-nine-year-old girl who returns to the city. She couldn't help but think of Cao Tieqiang and the relationship between her and him in the past ten years. She loved him, and still does, and can swear to heaven! But why doesn't he love her? She still doesn't understand. At one point, he wanted to dedicate his love hands to her, and he did not deceive her on this. She herself is not a girl who is easily confused by emotions and is easily deceived by people who pretend to be fake. No, no, he was not a man who played with a girl's feelings! though she could never get his love against, she could not allow herself to slander him, she could not allow herself to slander the love-like relationship that had passed between her and him, and yet which was cut off by something from love.

Love once surrounded her, but she didn't capture it. She had so much hope and tried to get it, but finally lost it. He gave love to others, to a girl who seemed to him completely impossible, but he really even gave it generously!

Was life itself wrong? Was he wrong? Or was she herself wrong?

When she visited her home the year before last, she began to realize that there was one of the most serious "crises" in her relationship with him. However, they did not quarrel! It should be said that the visit was very rewarding. She gently coaxed him, pleaded with him, and even played some small tricks, made up all kinds of excuses, and led him to visit her father's old comrades-in-arms, old leaders, and old subordinates one after another, from the commander of the provincial military district to the deputy mayor of so-and-so, from the director of so-and-so bureau to the head of so-and-so district. Yes, it's all purely courtesy. But is it not possible to accumulate intimate affection for such a purely courteous visit, and can the emotional ligaments forged with these characters be foolishly dismissed as unnecessary, meaningless, and worthless? No matter who wants to live with more confidence than others, to achieve greater achievements than others, and to excel among his peers, he must rely on the strength of others in his life. Who's life can get rid of the dependence of society? Who? Even extraordinary people. What's more, is she only for herself? Isn't it also for him? Not for her and his future together?!

If he doesn't understand her, despises her, despises her, is he just? He can not love her, but she has the right to ask for an answer. She can't be both lost and confused!

She thought of Kuang Fuchun, the attending doctor at the Youth League Health Center, and how anxious she was when he received his first reply letter from Harbin Medical University! From the words of that letter, she could see that he was deeply moved by her, and he was full of heartfelt gratitude to her. I am grateful to an unknown girl for her financial support and sincere encouragement. And she wrote to him and sent him to pick up the yuan, but it was just out of anger with Cao Tieqiang! Moreover, she forgot about it afterwards. Now that I've received a reply, I can't help but take it seriously. After some hesitation and reflection, the next month she sent him another letter and collected the yuan. Of course, she received a reply. Reply, send money, reply, send money...... Words of gratitude and "I hope you will study hard" are gradually eliminated from the correspondence. She felt that she had found someone who could confide in the other party her many worries and anguish. She also experienced being trusted by others, and from trusting to get a kind of friendship, and at the same time giving trust to others, and giving friendship to others is a beautiful thing in life! In the letter, he said that he hoped to meet her as soon as possible.

During another home visit, they met. At the end of the holiday, when he sent her on the train, he solemnly handed her a letter to whom he courted. It was the period when the relationship between her and Cao Tieqiang made her the most distressed and desperate. She stood in the aisle of the two carriages of the train, carrying strangers behind her back and crying. As soon as she returned to the company, she wrote a letter to Kuang Fuchun. In the letter, she told him that his chance to attend medical school was almost ruined by her. Tell him that she had loved another lad passionately...... How she was looking forward to his reply! There was only one line on the letter: Because you are such a frank girl, you are worthy of my love. ......

Today, she couldn't help but ask herself: Do I love him, and to what extent?

He is a generally respected doctor in the health center, and he is also good-looking. Compared with Cao Tieqiang, one is handsome and the other is Wenxiu. He loved his profession as much as he loved her. He is stronger than Cao Tie and can understand her, although he does not necessarily agree with her in everything.

Only he can heal the love scars caused by Cao Tieqiang on her soul. Only he can be on a par with Cao Tieqiang in her mind. Only those who can be on a par with Cao Tieqiang can replace Cao Tieqiang in her mind, and can finally occupy her entire heart!

Why should I think of love? Here, at this time? She looked up at Hump Mountain again. There, the burial is taking place, and here I sit...... How contemptible it is!" to stay or to leave, I must make a final decision within half an hour. She glanced at her watch and grabbed a handful of snow from the snow. The icy stimulation of the snow made her shiver and stabilized her mind. "In half an hour, if the snow in my hands has not melted, I will leave...... If it melts, I'll leave ......" A drop of snow trickled slowly down her fingers, and finally dripped on the snow, freezing into a small pearl on the surface of the snow shell. In less than ten minutes, the snow had melted from her hands. Hands, it's too hot. Remain?...... More than 800 of them are gone, 400,000 of them are gone, and they are staying? Choosing a life path that is contrary to most people, other people's experience tells her that it is too risky! A lonely female intellectual young man, does she have to experience countless violent snowstorms like last night in the Great Northern Wilderness?!

No, no, no! that's terrible. What's more, after her feet step on this land, her soul will feel restless from time to time. Because, here are buried Liu Mike and Pei Xiaoyun, today. The thought of this made her heart feel like it was being grilled over a charcoal fire. At the same time, she thought of an incident not long ago: Lian Li suddenly received an official letter from the Corps headquarters one day, on which more than a dozen lines were typed on a typewriter - the so-called suspected case that Pei Xiaoyun's mother was a foreign spy was purely a political persecution of patriotic returned overseas Chinese. Her father's political problems were also completely rehabilitated. Her aunt abroad asked for permission to go abroad to inherit the estate. If I agree to go abroad, the company will hold a farewell party. As a political task, the farewell party must be held......

When she showed the official letter to Pei Xiaoyun, Pei Xiaoyun cried. "I don't have a close one in the country, I need relatives!" With Pei Xiaoyun's words, Zheng Yaru presided over a farewell party. She said the opening remarks like this: "Today, we held a farewell party for Ms. Pei Xiaoyun to go abroad. We hope that Ms. Pei Xiaoyun will be able to become a red capitalist when she goes abroad. This is even if I represent Quanlian's parting message to Ms. Pei...... "This opening sentence was drafted and memorized with a pen. Why is there such a term as "madam"? Is there any sarcasm or ridicule in the words? She could not deny it.

After she finished speaking, Pei Xiaoyun stood up and said: "I need relatives, I need people who care about me and love me, but I don't want to leave the motherland, I don't want to leave the Great Northern Wilderness! I believe that in the Great Northern Wilderness, I will find someone who cares about me and loves me...... After speaking, he left the venue.

The farewell party did not happen, and people dispersed, and in the end, only she and Cao Tieqiang remained. Cao Tieqiang looked at her and wanted to say something, but he didn't say anything, just shook his head and left her behind. It was from that day that she realized that she had not only lost her love, but also her friendship. He would not say anything to repensure her.

Thinking of this, Zheng Yaru stood up and hurriedly walked towards the regiment headquarters. She was going to find Kuang Fuchun. She made up her mind to go. "There is no crossroads," she said to herself in her heart, "for me, there is only one choice left, to leave the Great Northern Wilderness." She understands that Cao Tieqiang will not leave the Great Northern Wilderness. Until last night, she and he were two collaborators leading a company and two contenders on the road of life. is like two race walkers on the sports field, comparing the endurance and perseverance to persist in the Great Northern Wilderness. Only love can change this relationship between them, and love has long since died between them. The rest is just resentment, and perhaps even more, hatred. Can anyone forgive the person who caused the death of the girl he loves? Even if he said the words of forgiveness to her with his own mouth, she could not believe it. Even if she believed him, she couldn't forgive herself. Leave, leave...... Never leave ...... behind I want to leave with Kuang Fuchun, with Kuang Fuchun. Halfway through, she suddenly slowed down. She finally ...... Stopped. She finally ...... Changing direction, she headed towards Hump Mountain.

She came to the place where Mike Liu and Pei Xiaoyun were buried. She stood for a long time in front of two new graves. She fell to her knees in the snow. She used her hands to peel open the hard shell of the snow, revealing the ground, and her fingers were digging at the ground. The snow that was picked up received sunlight and melted. The hard ground was a little wet. She finally picked up a tiny handful of dirt. Her nails were cracked and her fingers were bloody, but she didn't feel pain. She took the small handful of earth in both hands, stood up slowly, and reverently scattered the earth on the two graves.

She begged in her heart: "Mike Liu, Pei Xiaoyun, you forgive me......"

She revealed the content of the emergency meeting at the regiment headquarters. Before the meeting, Head Ma talked to her alone, instructed her to speak first at the meeting, expressed her attitude, and promised her that if she wanted to leave the Great Northern Wilderness, all the procedures would be on him. While the head of the regiment was out for a while, she hurriedly grabbed the phone and told her cousin, who was a clerk in the water conservancy company, about this important situation related to the fate of the educated youth, and urged the other party to take countermeasures quickly......

When she turned around and was about to leave, she found Cao Tieqiang standing a few steps away, looking at her. The two faced each other silently for a moment, she met his gaze, walked towards him step by step, walked up to him, and said, "Punish me, I beg you to ......" He shook his head: "No, my fist has never fallen on a repentant person......" "Hit me, hit me, hit me, I beg you to ......" Tears flowed from her eyes. "No, I can't...... I know you're leaving. I hope that in the future, when you recall and talk to anyone about the ten-year history of our soldiers in the Great Northern Wilderness, don't complain, don't curse, don't laugh at yourself and ridicule, and don't ...... Denigrate...... We have given and lost a lot, but what we have gained is still more than what we have lost, and we have more weight than what we have lost. That's my ...... to you, too. Ask for ......" He said this, stared at her for a long time, then turned and strode away.

She looked at his back, then looked back at the two new piles of graves, her hands slowly raised, covering her face......

The daughter of the old Great Northern Wilderness was lying on the bed in the regimental health center, her face like white paper. Last night, she rode Pei Xiaoyun to the regiment headquarters on horseback, and miscarried on the saddle halfway. When she arrived at the health center, she fainted and rolled to the ground......

She was in tears, weeping over the loss of her unborn child and girlfriend. Emotionally and psychologically, she already has the characteristics of a subtle motherhood. And this kind of grief that she has never endured, like a great thunder and lightning that bombards the universe, violently swept across her inner world.

The educated youths of the engineering company came to the health center. They were stopped in the corridor by the doctor Kuang Fuchun, who prevented them from entering the ward.

"I can only allow two people into the ward. He put his hands in the pockets of his white coat and said in a non-negotiable tone, "Everyone else, please go outside." "It's as if he's a king and this is his palace.

"Can't you even stand outside the door of the hospital room and look at it?" muttered someone. He didn't answer, cocking his chin at the "Ward Order" that was attached to the wall. The little bricklayer exclaimed, "When is this still the case?" and he glanced at the little bricklayer and replied, "Now is my duty, I am a doctor, and I am doing my duty, and I am doing my duty." Everyone looked at Cao Tieqiang helplessly. Cao Tieqiang said, "Then please allow me to enter the ward." Kuang Fuchun looked Cao Tieqiang up and down and recognized him. The little bricklayer hurriedly said, "He is our company commander." He said to Cao Tieqiang again: "Company commander, shall I go in with you?" Cao Tieqiang nodded. Kuang Fuchun dodged away and said to the two, "Ten minutes." I looked at the watch. As a reminder, don't talk about the event that was unfortunate for her. "Everyone, it's all ...... Is it gone?"

When Cao Tieqiang and the little bricklayer walked into the ward and walked to Xiumei's bed, she asked, looking at them with tearful eyes. "No, not all of them. I stay, I don't go. Cao Tieqiang said, "Everyone wanted to come to see you, but the doctor stopped me." "Company commander, I thank you. Mike has a young man to keep him company. Xiumei said, and asked, "Why didn't he come to see me?Where is he?How much do I need him to come and see me......" Cao Tieqiang couldn't help but hold one of her hands: "He's doing something very important...... He wants me to tell you, don't be angry with him for it. Xiumei smiled slightly, turned her face to the little bricklayer, and said kindly: "Little bricklayer, when you go back to the city, don't forget to write to me and the chief of affairs, and write often, otherwise he will definitely scold you to me." He ...... you like a brother."

The little bricklayer bit his lip tightly and nodded.

......

In the duty room of the health center, there was also a conversation between Zheng Yaru and Kuang Fuchun.

He asked, "Have you completed all the formalities for returning to the city?"

She nodded and asked, "What about you?"

He shook his head.

"Why? Why don't you go for it?"

"I ...... The original decision, even today, has not changed. ”

"You...... Don't play such jokes with me, I'm afraid, I'm afraid I'll hear such things from you!" her eyes widened as she looked at him, and fear flashed in her eyes.

He shook his head: "No, not a joke. ”

"You...... Why don't you change your decision? You can't do that, it's too rash, and you'll regret it for the rest of your life!" she threw herself at him, her hands grabbing the hem of his white coat.

He sensibly parted her hand, took a step back, smoothed his coat, and said, "Perhaps, but that will certainly be in the future." But I haven't regretted it yet, so I can't shake my decision yet. It was the XPCC that sent me to a medical university, and it was the XPCC that created the conditions for me to pursue a career as a doctor. By the time I graduated, I could have stayed in college. It was only because I thought of this that I returned to the Great Northern Wilderness. After I came back, how I hoped that a very decent hospital would be built on the land of the Great Northern Wilderness where I lived. Now that such a hospital has been built, I am satisfied with the conditions here. I've always been proud to realize that I'm an important doctor in this hospital. More importantly, I developed feelings for everything in this hospital......"

"No, no, I don't listen! I don't listen......" she cried out in despair, her hands over her ears.

Glancing at her, he continued: "Don't cover your ears, you should listen, otherwise, you won't be able to understand me...... I was on duty from last night to this morning. When I made my rounds around the ward, I could see in the eyes of the patients that they wanted to keep me with that silent gaze, and I was touched by them. I suddenly asked myself, why did I leave here and leave my patients and go back to the city? Shouldn't a doctor work where doctors are most needed? Isn't the Great Northern Wilderness one of the places in China where doctors are most needed? After I asked myself such a question, I was determined to stay in the Great Northern Wilderness forever. When you first arrived in the Great Northern Wilderness, haven't you heard that women die because of general dystocia and men die because of appendicitis?...... I can't admit that my decision was rash......"

She slowly lowered her hands covering her ears. She stared at him in a daze, motionless, completely frozen, like a sculpture. Her eyes suddenly turned unusually gray.

"I know it's going to make you very sad for me to make that decision. I...... I feel guilty and feel sorry for you. I hope to be able to get your forgiveness......" The way she looked made him feel very uncomfortable. He took a step closer to her, took her hands, looked her in the eye, and whispered but affectionate, "Forgive me!"

She suddenly hugged him tightly, raised her face, and pleaded with the last ray of hope: "Don't make me sad, don't make me despair! I need you to leave the Great Northern Wilderness with me! I can't lose you, I love you! I can't lose everything in the Great Northern Wilderness! I have paid so much in the Great Northern Wilderness, I have lost so much, I must leave here with something! I want to take you, I want to return to the city with love......" Her voice trembled, her words were so urgent, and the pleading look in her eyes made him unbearable to look at.

But he still gently pushed her away, shook his head, and said, "The people of your company are outside......" He suddenly remembered something, glanced at his watch, and said, "You wait for me for a while, and I'll be back." With that, he left her and walked out.

He politely "invited" Cao Tieqiang and the little bricklayer from Xiumei's ward, and immediately hurried back to the duty room. She's gone. He stood in the doorway for a moment, then slowly walked to the table, sat down slowly, and slowly supported his forehead with one hand...... He uttered two words very lightly and with great pain: "Aru!"

At noon, a small jeep drove out of the regimental headquarters and headed for the road. Sitting in the car were the head of the regiment, Ma Chonghan, his lover and two daughters. When the car drove to the entrance of the highway, the driver first saw the political commissar Sun Guotai standing on the side of the highway, slowed down, turned his head and asked, "Commander, do you want to say goodbye to the political commissar?" The driver didn't say anything more, sped up, and the jeep drove past the commissar. Captain Ma suddenly patted the driver on the shoulder: "Stop ......" The jeep leaned to the side of the road and stopped. Commander Ma opened the car door, jumped out of the car, and strode towards the political commissar.

The old political commissar had just sent away a group of young intellectuals from the companies directly under the regiment headquarters, who had taken long-distance buses, and some of them had even discarded their covers and boxes. The journey lasted for nine hours, and after the appearance of the fixed watch star tonight, they would leave the land of the Great Northern Wilderness from now on. A kind of infinite attachment to them welled up in his heart, and a kind of ...... Loss. After all, the Great Northern Wilderness needs them so much! Regiment Leader Ma walked up to him and shouted: "Old Sun ......" He turned around and saw that it was the regiment leader, and he was a little surprised. The regiment commander's brand-new grass-green military uniform also left flaws everywhere that were burned during the firefighting last night. Captain Ma stretched out a hand to him: "I have also decided to leave." A report on the application for transfer of jobs has been sent to the division headquarters, requesting him to return to his hometown...... Send your family away today. The old commissar didn't say anything and silently shook his hand. Captain Ma smiled bitterly and said, "I won't pass the buck to others for my mistakes." I accept any disciplinary action given to me by the organization...... My checks have already been written and placed on my desk...... "The old commissar still did not speak. "Lao Sun, in the past ten years, we have not cooperated well in our work...... Reflecting on many of the past, I'm ashamed. I...... There are some things that the lessons accumulated over the past 10 years often do not make people realize their mistakes all at once. But a grim state of affairs can be a source of drama. Last night's chaos didn't get to the point of unimaginable, I ...... Thank you!" He shook the commissar's hand vigorously, let go, and turned to leave.

The old political commissar fully believed that the other party's remarks were sincere and sincere. But he didn't know what he should say to the other party at this moment. When the regimental commander walked back to the jeep, he called out, "Old horse!" and strode over.

"Old Ma, I have something to say to you, and I hope you will remember it. He walked up to the regimental commander and looked at the other with deep eyes. "Whether in summing up experience or summing up lessons, we should not overestimate the role of the individual, and it may be more objective to understand our personal mistakes in light of the mistakes of the times. ”

Captain Ma sighed heavily.

The old political commissar also said: "The wave of intellectual youth returning to the city is by no means something that our personal will can stop. Whatever our intentions are good...... Still is...... The ultimate obligation and responsibility of you, me, and every cadre of the Corps should not be to try by all means to prevent young intellectuals from returning to the city, but to conscientiously sum up the experiences and lessons of various factors in various fields and record them in the history of the development of agricultural reclamation in the frontiers. He was silent for a while, as if he felt that he should say a few words of farewell, but he felt that the most important words had been said, and that the words of farewell would seem very inappropriate at this moment, so he remained silent.

Head Ma took out a cigarette case, took out a cigarette, and handed it to the old political commissar.

The old political commissar didn't want to take it, he seemed to have just chewed absinthe in his mouth, and it was very bitter, but seeing that the other party's face was a solemn expression of "parting respect", he realized that this cigarette had extraordinary value at this moment, so he took it in his hand.

Commander Ma himself took one in his mouth, then took out a lighter and lit a cigarette for the old political commissar first. For some reason, the regiment commander himself didn't want to smoke it, so he took off the cigarette in his mouth and put it in the cigarette case. His slow, contemplative movements made the old commissar feel as if he had closed the cigarette case this time, and might never open it again.

The lips are not only bitter, but also dry. The old commissar took only two puffs of cigarette and then snuffed it out.

The old political commissar opened the car door for the regiment leader, and the head of the regiment Ma stared at the old political commissar's face for a second for the last time, and the tall and burly figure got into the small jeep very inconveniently.

The old commissar found that the faces of the woman and the two girls sitting in the car showed a slight uneasiness. He smiled at the woman and stroked the little girl's head. Seeing that the little girl was not wearing a headscarf, she took off her scarf and put it around the little girl's neck.

The old commissar gently closed the car door for the family. He stood on the side of the road for a long time and watched the little jeep speed away, then turned a corner and disappeared at the foot of the hump mountain......

He turned around and faced the direction of the regimental headquarters, from which the avenue leading to the regimental headquarters area left the remnants of confusion: the scattered footprints and intersecting ruts on the snow, the felled and chopped poplars beside the road, apparently the various things that were thrown off the carts or discarded by the unwanted intellectuals......

He suddenly felt so melancholy, so empty!

The old political commissar returned to the regiment headquarters and had just walked into the office, when the head of the military affairs unit also walked in, holding a stack of files in both hands.

The head of the military affairs unit said: "Political commissar, these are thirty-nine files, they took them from my hands and handed them back to me...... Seeing that the political commissar did not understand his words for a while, he said: "Thirty-nine educated youths said that they want to stay in the Great Northern Wilderness." ”

The old political commissar took the thirty-nine file bags with both hands, like the world's largest gold nugget with both hands, and felt that no matter what kind of scale he had at this moment, he could not weigh the precious weight of these thirty-nine file bags.

He wept.

He said: "It's not thirty-nine, it's forty-one, it's forty-one intellectual youths, who stayed on this piece of land in the Great Northern Wilderness. I want to rebuild the field history museum of our farm, and the two archives of intellectual youth should be placed in the field history museum, and the relics of the martyrs who sacrificed their lives for the development of the Great Northern Wilderness should be placed together. After a moment of silence, he continued: "I would also like to propose that a monument be erected for two young intellectuals, decorated with stone symbols, crossed ears of wheat and guns, and holding a tractor. This is the design of the cockade of the Corps' soldiers' uniforms, which more than 400,000 young intellectuals hoped to realize but never realized, and it is also the promise that the Corps made to more than 400,000 educated youths. In the past 10 years, many promises made to young intellectuals have become empty words, and I would like to fulfill one of them for two young intellectuals. ”

The chief of the military affairs unit said: "Commissar, I am the first to agree with your proposal. "You, on my behalf, are deeply grateful to these thirty-nine young intellectuals. "They also want me to tell you, they thank you, thank you for the evaluation you gave them......" At this moment, the phone rang. "It's me, I'm political commissar Sun Guotai. I, yes, I obey the decisions of the organization......"

The old commissar slowly put down the telephone receiver, turned around, and looked at the head of the military affairs unit. "Where's the call?" "Corps headquarters. "What's the matter?" "Transfer me to the Third Division to serve as the division commander, their division commander ...... Back to the troops. "That'...... Then our regiment ......" "Now it is not usual, I appoint you as acting head and political commissar. "I ......" "Now is not the time to excuse myself. From today onwards, you will take over the work of me and Commander Ma! Soon, the Corps will be restored to the farm system. You, probably like me, are going to bury your bones in the Great Northern Wilderness, right?" the chief nodded silently. The two first-generation entrepreneurs of the Great Northern Wilderness said many things to each other with their eyes......

The "28" tractor trailer of the engineering company left the regimental headquarters at the end. Before leaving, they cleaned up the chaotic remnants of the regimental area. The little bricklayer's brother found him and asked him when he would leave for the city. He replied, "Why do you want to go with me? Can't you go first by yourself? You're not a three-year-old child, and I need to take care of you on the way." "When I was a younger brother, I couldn't understand why my brother was angry.

Cao Tieqiang pulled the little bricklayer's younger brother aside and said, "I ask you one thing, my adoptive father is now very seriously ill and is living in the No. 1 Municipal Hospital, and my sister is taking care of his old man's home. Although they are not my own father or sister, they love me very much, and I love them very much. When you get off the train, don't go back to your own home, go to the hospital first, tell him about the old man, and say that I ask him to stay at the old man's house, and I will be back to his old man in a few days. But I can't leave the company now, I'm the company commander......"

"Do you need me to tell them, have you decided to stay in the Great Northern Wilderness?" he shook his head: "No, they will only understand if I tell them myself." ”

......

The "28" tractor trailer drove on the wasteland, like a barge on the sea at night. Everyone, speechless, pondered. I don't know who asked, "Hey, what about our instructor?" and no one answered. Zheng Yaru was sitting on the coach at this time. She didn't want the bedding and the wooden box that had been with her for ten years in the company's dormitory. Before she boarded the long-distance bus, she loaded a jar of snow from the land of the Great Northern Wilderness. The snow had turned into water, but she was still holding the toothbrush jar in both hands.

Oh, the snow in the Great Northern Wilderness, this is manifested in the Great Northern Wilderness prints, it is so beautiful and charming snow, but as soon as it leaves the land of the Great Northern Wilderness, it melts so quickly! Isn't the temperature in the car as cold as outside? She doesn't understand that it was the warmth of her hands that melted the snow.

Can't I even take a handful of snow with me? Since I can't take it away, let's return it to the land of the Great Northern Wilderness! Let this snow water freeze into ice again, let this ice melt again in the spring, and seep into the land of the Great Northern Wilderness! She gently rolled down half of the car window and sprinkled the half of the snow water out of the window, along with a few tears that she fell into the snow......

The "barge" is still moving on the moor at night. If you also have thoughts and words, what would you say about the ten years and the two unquiet nights? The night "sea" of the wasteland is so silent! The little bricklayer sitting in the car took something out of his pocket and quietly tore it apart with people on his back. Several pieces of white paper fell from his hands on the snow. On the hump, there was another desolate barking of a dog - it was the voice of the "black panther". The wasteland is so silent, so silent, so silent......