"I'm choking......"

"Choke...... Stay!"

Three words, it seems that it took a lifetime to kill a way out of the blocked throat.

As soon as the words fell, Jiang Zimu shrugged up, rolled his eyes, and directly snatched the bag of Coke in Xiao Da Idol's hand.

"Clams?"

"Oh, oh, I choked. ”

Xiao Lizao's eyes when he looked at Jiang Zimu were full of deep friendship like Comrade Ge. I was at a loss to swing my two arms blindly, I really didn't know what I could do to help, so I could only stretch out my two hands stupidly, and protect the side of the cola bag to protect my own bag of drinks.

"Slow down, drink...... Take a sip and go with the flow. ”

I don't care if this straw is new or not, and I don't think about whether this is an indirect kiss at all, Jiang Zimu only knows that his chest is blocked with a late rush hour after work, and if he doesn't guide it, I'm afraid that his life will be invalidated here.

Jiang Zimu's irritability made me panic.

I took a big sip with a straw, closed my eyes, and swallowed with my teeth.

"Boom. ”

Uh, no effect? I feel that this cola seems to have been absorbed by the circle of glutinous rice, except for making the rice grains more round and full, it has not played any constructive effect.

Too little water?

Straw efficiency too low?

Jiang Zimu smashed his chest with a small fist, opened his eyes, and simply threw the straw into Xiao Lizao's arms, carrying the handle of the plastic bag in one hand, pinching the corner of the bag with the other, leaning his neck, and then lifting the whole bag of Coke, ready to pour it directly into his throat.

Slow down, slow down.

As long as the mouth is wide enough and the Coke is poured accurately, two mouthfuls can be poured down, and the Hot Wheels can be washed away!

Slow down, slow down.

Seeing that Coke was getting closer and closer to the mouth of the bag, Jiang Zimu's two arms trembled uncontrollably, and his whole body involuntarily trembled slightly under the pressure of that big lump of glutinous rice meat.

Seeing Jiang Zimu's movements slow to the point that gif became jpg, Xiao Da Idol on the side thought for a while, and gave two explanations in a very four-dimensional way This goddess, is it that the bag has been lifted for too long and has no strength?

Oh my God, time is of the essence, and I'm glad I reacted fast. If you don't think of this layer, I'm afraid that if this goddess is directly choked on the corpse, she won't be able to drink a mouthful of life-saving Coke in her life.

His eyes rolled, and in the next second, Xiao Da Idol was full of angelic light, lifted the cola bag from the bottom with one hand, turned to Jiang Zimu's back with the other, and thumped it hard.

I thought that the addition of the two forces must be a solution. But it's a pity that Xiao Da Idol's European emperor physique is really only applicable to himself.

Because of Xiao Lizao's rough help, Coke was suddenly forced. Like an out-of-control flash flood, it crossed the safety barrier of plastic bags and came in a surge.

Jiang Zimu leaned forward, and his hand shook, and he heard a horn, and most of the bags of Coke and a few ice cubes mixed with it flew down, covering Jiang Zimu's face.

Even if the cola spills on the face and flows into the mouth, it still pours directly down the nostrils, which is unbearable.

Jiang Zimu's body folded down like a folder, and he coughed for more than a minute. Harazi and snot bubbled, mixed with fat house water, covered the little half of the face sticky.

"Vomit~~~uh~~~"

After a long hiccup, the crash restarts.

After being silent for a century, and after thinking about his past and present lives clearly, Jiang Zimu wiped the fat house water that was covering his eyelids, got up tremblingly, and stood in front of Xiao Da Idol without saying a word.

There is no lightness for the rest of the life, let alone the surprise of reuniting old friends, some are just the nasal cavities that have been fully washed by Coke, and the indescribable sour and swollen, gasping for breath, you can smell a strange fragrance.

Jiang Zimu raised his hand and wiped the tears from the corners of his eyes miserably, and the color on his face turned from purple to black.

Facing Jiang Zimu, who was close at hand, Xiao Li's desire to survive, which was already out of stock, finally woke up and got up slowly to open for business.

The strength of the tiger descending the mountain.

The murderous aura of the evil meow's eyes.

Although Xiao Da Idol didn't know what was going on, and I didn't know why it happened like this, but, as a beautiful man with a lot of eyesight, my sixth sense told me that now is not the time to laugh wildly.

Burst~~~

"Clam clam ~~~"

No, no, I can't laugh, I have to do something to make up for my mistakes.

"Clam clam ~~~"

Right...... That's right.

Jiang Zimu watched Xiao Lizao laugh like a wild horse, and then, as if the power was suddenly cut off, he froze motionlessly in place, and finally, he hurriedly groped through all his pockets and found something.

Jiang Zimu just looked at it coldly, as if it was none of his business. didn't speak, but in his heart he sneered and muttered Don't think, you take out a tissue or handkerchief now, pretend to be a gentleman and wipe your hands and face for the old lady, and this matter can be over.

Hehe.

Of course not.

Because Xiao Da Idol didn't think about that at all.

Ten seconds later, this strange man with abnormal brain circuits and weak desire to survive finally took out his mobile phone from his ass pocket.

Whatever, no matter what, you have to take a picture first!

"Click!"

Crisp and clean.

"Click, click, click!"

Xiao Lizao held his mobile phone unconsciously, admiring the beautiful picture on the screen.

"Tut-tut, look at this composition!

"And this ray capture!"

"Hahaha~~~"

Colorful moments, embarrassing to outstanding!

Jiang Zimu glanced at the mobile phone that Xiao Lizao handed over, well, it's very good.

The tall one of 1.7 meters was photographed by you as 1.5 meters, and half of his face still had white scum after his snot was dried, and his bangs soaked in cola were wispping wildly. The most unmissable thing is that the stall at the foot looks like vomit after a hangover, hehe, with Jiang Zimu's desperate and empty eyes, it is simply a masterpiece of postmodern deconstruction.

What is this? Death capture from the perspective of a pseudo-boyfriend?

Jiang Zimu's dark eyes almost rolled over his temples.

The heart is like ashes.

"Huh, why is it so cold?"

Xiao Da idol's body shook after realizing it, his eyes squinted, his ears moved, and he felt that he heard a strange sound.

"Huh, the phone comes with a camera sound?"

Xiao Li had already carried his mobile phone, put it to his ear, shook it, and listened.

Jiang Zimu's detached movement of his wrists and ankles, his hands clenched, and his joints clicked.

Hehe, you stupid old man, can the sound of a bullet being loaded be the same as the sound of a flash snapping?

Before the formal dinner.

Jiang Zimu's single-family cottage.

Gu Suixin had a puzzled expression, "What are you two doing here?" on his face, and stared at the two little pot friends sitting in rows on the sofa opposite.

"Gu Ma ......"

"Don't look at me like that. It's none of my business, okay?"

said so, but Xiao Da Idol's two hands were still honestly on his knees.

"I thought that this goddess was choked and about to suffocate, so I thought about helping her and help her squeeze the Coke into her mouth. ”

Am I wrong? Saving someone's life is better than creating a seventh-level floating slaughter!

Gu Suixin didn't speak, but Jiang Zimu snorted after him.

"Big brother, if you do this, I will not only be choked to death, but also choked to death, okay. ”

There are two ways to die, there is always one for you.

"What are you talking about? You don't want to sit here upright. ”

Jiang Zimu turned his head coldly, pulled his lower eyelids, and stuck out his tongue.

"Dead. Tonight is the night of the soul. ”

"You can hide alone, don't be found by my three souls and seven spirits. ”

Knowing that it was a joke, Xiao Da Idol still shivered very appropriately, raised his hand, and swept at Jiang Zimu, "Divine woman...... Don't make a fuss, hehe, don't make a fuss. ”

As soon as he finished saying this, the room suddenly became cold.

Xiao Li had already felt the cold wind swishing behind him, and he took out his mobile phone very uncomfortably, trying to liven up the atmosphere, and by the way, dispel this inexplicable and eerie atmosphere.

Sure enough, as soon as I saw the photo I just captured, no matter how terrifying the ghosts were, they all seemed to use ten-level beauty.

What is not dead, laugh first and then talk.

"Clam clam ~~~"

"Gu, Mom, look...... Clams clams clams ...... The expression of this goddess is really ...... It's really contagious, hahaha~~~"

"Oh my God, that's funny......"

"I'm laughing to death. No, my abs hurt. ”

Jiang Zimu felt the sofa shake like electricity, glanced at Xiao Lizao, who stomped his feet from time to time and smashed the wall from time to time, sighed, and exchanged a "caring for the mentally handicapped" look with Gu Suixin.

"Goddess, hahaha, look at your expression, seriously, you debut, the proper king of comedy, you are simply a bright comedian, okay?"

Xiao Da Idol didn't see Gu Suixin's eye knife that had been floating past at all, and he was happy to be an emoji again without realizing it.

Jiang Zimu blinked, and turned the wise saying "murder and breaking the law" back and forth in his mind eight hundred times, and actually started such a vicious thought in Langfu, a place full of temples, it was blasphemous.

"Hehe, no matter how dazzling my comedian is, I can't fight your blind dog-eyed-sweep-handle-star!"

。