Since when did Ou Ruoxi be alone, when she was living alone, or when she couldn't vent the bitterness in her heart.

What she likes to record in this way is a kind of inner action, so she opened her laptop at this time and opened this Weibo.

Sometimes she really needs a way to vent a very unhappy feeling in her heart, or an emotion, whether it's true or not.

She likes to use words to express herself, and she feels that after using words to express herself, she can make this mood more calm.

And some people forget some things that should be forgotten, if they really follow their own situation, if they don't forget and don't give up.

So is there a lot of unnecessary trouble, of course, this kind of thing you will think that this kind of thing may appear a lot of possibilities, but this kind of thing is not what you want to get.

If there are some such words, why do you need to be so careless to have more cranky thoughts about this kind of thing, what else can't you put down except the people in the family?

At this time, when I need myself the most, my mother is now in a bad state in all aspects, shouldn't I be able to do more to accompany myself at this time?

And the companionship is actually the best confession of the longest love.

Ou Ruoxi wrote a few words on her Weibo.

"I don't know why, if I love her, why I never get any memories, maybe when the vicissitudes of life have passed, we will no longer go back to our youth, the best time of that year, maybe it's really like a child I know very well, it's like really eating a string of lollipops, a string of rock sugar gourds, and I can't find the sweet feeling of the past, maybe all this is just a thought in our own imagination, when these all happen into stories, is it really a sea of water？”

Ou Ruoxi was thinking nonsense, she didn't know what she was writing, she was making up these words to type.

And.

It's all written and deleted, deleted and written.

Neither knew what she was writing in the process, or for herself, or for the current situation, she had more ideas or more of a possibly more understanding and commitment to it.

But I don't know what I should do better, but my mood is like this after all, and sometimes she really wants to shoot a cathartic more emotions in her heart.

But sometimes you feel that this kind of monologue of inner emotions or inner emotions is like a kind of text, and it will be difficult for you to understand.

She clasped her hand tightly, and she suddenly felt an inexplicable feeling of loneliness, and she was at a loss.

She naively thought that all these things could be rewarded, and she thought that these things would become many things.

But a lot of things really disappeared imperceptibly in this process, and when it comes to reality, it is not what I imagined it to be, because what kind of reality it is, it is obviously a loud slap in the face.

What you give is not rewarded at all.

Ou Ruoxi may have been like this again, simply thinking that if she puts all her efforts and enthusiasm in this entertainment industry, she will be rewarded for all her work.

But this is not the case in real life, many things, there are too many unspoken rules, there are too many rules of a game, and it is not that you can make a molecule that you will not be in the rules of this game.

I don't have any right to decide by myself, so I am a very lonely person in this situation.

It is as if I am walking on this road like a lonely heart, drying up and finally thirsty and wanting to drink water.

But I just can't find that oasis.

And then his enthusiasm for Fei Yan, this kind of affection for her, it seems that there is no way, and with the disappearance of the years, Fei Yan should have her own life and the woman she loves.

I am nothing, is it because of the emergence of ideas, should I be re-energized in the process to pursue her? Do you think there is any point in this pursuit?

Will they all still exist here?

No, no, no, the identities of the two of them form such a big difference.

How could there be more of an idea at this time, or more understanding at this time, how could these things be there and not be there.

All kinds of miracles that I once expected had to get all kinds of rewards, but those things were all stories in fairy tales, those were all lies, and everything could not be done according to what I envisioned, just like the stupid self in the gentleman, how should I face Fei Yan?

And like Fei Yan's current development, today's position has completely doubled, and its traffic and reputation are completely not the same level as himself.

They are like a galaxy in between, proving that Hexi is impassable, and if they follow this development, they will drift farther and farther away, and they will not be able to merge together.

This is inevitable, and they are already in their own worlds!

It's really that I'm too angry, it's really my own problem, if I meet him again, maybe I'll really sink again.

My own commitment has been obtained throughout the process, and there is no way to be so happy, is he really so stupid.

Is there really no way to start over? Is it true that you can't forget yourself, right?

Could it be that Fei Yan is still such an important existence in this inner world, and he can't have too many things for the flow of hands.

But knowing that this faith has really reached something that cannot be forgotten.

Sometimes the more you want to forget someone, the more you can't forget!

In Ou Ruoxi's words, he kept churning, at this time he really didn't know what to say or do, and the notebook was in his hand, so that he really wanted to put all the emotions, all the moods, all the crackles.

When he liked these things, he seemed to get a kind of total relaxation in his inner world, and he didn't know why the world made him feel so miserable.

Why does he feel that he is constantly torturing himself in this process, he wants to be meticulous, he wants to return to the good life he used to have, he wants to make everything he has become the best thing he once had.

All the best things he ever had had have been completely dedicated to Fei Yan, can't all this move the heavens?

No, you can't go back to the best of the past.

At that time, he got up and went to the counter to get a glass of red wine, poured a glass, and went down to a well, and embraced all his emotions and all his unhappy moods.

His face is really starting to get drunk again, and the alcohol really can't give him his brain now, and he sometimes thinks how good it would be to be really drunk and happy.

But there is really no way to make yourself completely pure with these things, just like drinking that day and completely forgetting everything.

Ou Ruoxi sat back on the sofa at this time, drinking wine one by one, looking at the world of performances outside the window, all his thoughts had become completely confused in the process.

He was now lonely and immersed in his own world, and it would be nice if he could forget everything in this world.

Maybe these things should be like this alcohol bird, which has never seen anything, and how nice it would be, that everything went on as it should.

Ou Ruoxi felt that this time was really special, why was there an expectation, why was there a wish, hoping that Fei Yan would accompany him, as if he was drinking with himself by his side, he seemed to throw himself into Fei Yan's arms all of a sudden, and cried happily.

Let yourself tell some of the painful things you have experienced over the years, and let those processes be told without any intuition.

The cold world told him that he was the only one in this world, that he was the only one in this room, and that he could no longer find anyone.

But if it really happens, then everything should be great, but if those things really exist, how good it would be, he even called me God, and let him have Fei Yan once, just like when he was young.

Fei Yan was waiting for him that kind of surprise at his doorstep, how eager they were, at this time, it was exactly the same as what happened 8 years ago, and he would thank God for bringing him such a great opportunity and benefits!

Maybe you can only dream, only dreaming can have such an illusion.

At this time, I don't know why Ou Ruoxi's phone rang suddenly......

Ou Ruoxi opened a phone with tears, but suddenly saw a familiar name, saw that familiar phone, Fei Yan's!

Ou Ruoxi looked at it in a daze, his fingers didn't dare to move, he didn't know whether to pick it up or not, what he didn't know was real or fake!

It was when he was drunk that he saw this thing, he looked at all the comments on this phone seriously, yes, it was Fei Yan's phone, and there was no mistake at this point!

After his phone rang a few times, he thought it was really fake, so the phone suddenly stopped again.

When Ou Ruoxi wanted to answer, the phone stopped quietly, because she hadn't answered the call for too long just now.

Ou Ruoxi had a feeling in his heart that he didn't know what kind of thing he wanted to answer at this time, and when he heard the familiar call, he sank even more, and he was very much looking forward to Fei Yan calling again.

Let yourself sink down, even if it is like becoming a devil, you make any deal with the devil, as long as he calls again, you will not miss this opportunity, why didn't you take it just now?

I'm really a coward, why didn't you dare to answer the phone call just now, don't you even have the courage to answer this way? No wonder you don't deserve this relationship, now maybe someone else calls over, maybe it's a simple greeting from a strange friend, and that's all.

Do you think why are you afraid of this thing? The more you avoid it, the more afraid you become, the more afraid you are to face this feeling.

Then you will always be in this relationship, and you will never be able to be born again!

Ou Ruoxi is really looking forward to this call coming back at this time, how much he is looking forward to this thing really getting for himself, even if he has anything to do with it tonight, it doesn't matter, he wants to make himself really crazy about this matter.

Otherwise, the phone vibrated again at this time, and he couldn't wait at this time, Ou Ruoxi knew that the call he didn't answer again seemed to have missed a lot of things.

This matter was so important to him that he couldn't help but accept it, he felt that this matter had reached all the limits of what he could accept.

Ou Ruoxi closed her eyes and connected the phone directly.

"Hi, Ou Ruoxi......" Fei Yan's very gentle voice came from the phone.

Ou Ruoxi is heart is really pounding, he doesn't know how to use these restrained languages, he doesn't know if the rhythm of these words will be chaotic, and he can't wait at this time.

Or maybe he wants to slow down the pace of his language, but he can't help it, his language rhythm is sometimes filled with all his feelings just by answering it.

"Hmmm'...... I'm here. ”

"Today's weather is good, and it's rare to have more time today, there shouldn't be a lot of things in your crew, do you want us to have a cup of coffee, I want to meet you......"

Fei Yan's voice is still so gentle and full of sexiness, that people really can't refuse.

Ou Ruoxi really doesn't know how to deal with his heart, he doesn't know what decision he should make, he wants to do a fierce struggle, but all his examples are defeated by this Qashqai class teacher, and everything he does now is not important.

And he only wants to see a man now, he wants to be with a man, he wants to have coffee with him, even if the weather doesn't matter, there is no one case in all the examples he has now.

He was now filled with an indescribable passion.

"Good...... I'm at home, you'll have to wait a minute. Ou Ruoxi said.

Fei Yan was obviously very emotional at this time, and there was an emotion that he didn't know, so he said to him gently.

"Do you want me to pick you up? I'm near your house right now, not very far away?"

Of course, Lean Meat was careful when asking this question, of course he would give Ou Ruoxi more time and space, he didn't want to ask too much of him too much in this world.

Or there are more of these restrictions on him, and he wants them to go with the flow in the process.

And without letting the authenticity without too many surprises, it will frighten the other party.

At this time.

Ou Ruoxi didn't expect that Fei Yan was really near home, he felt that this thing seemed to be like the beautiful time of youth ten thousand years ago, he would have his own, and he felt that this was a very beautiful feeling, so he blurted out.

"It may take some time, can you wait for me to come down in half an hour......

"Okay, I'll wait for you, just under the banyan tree downstairs in your house. ”

"Hmmm......"

The call was very short, and it seemed that the point was over, and both of them seemed to be cautious, as if they were worried about what the other party would suddenly regret.

Or if there is an element of rejection, they are very afraid, this kind of feeling, just like the first love of their youth at that time.

If this is not the case, how could the whole thing suddenly have so many possibilities and accidents in the process?

Fei Yan was very excited at this time, he didn't know why, he suddenly felt that he was really not so difficult in all the successes of all this,

Ou Ruoxi, a woman, really made herself feel that she had paid too much in this matter, but it didn't matter if she was willing to pay, because this was the biggest dream in her life!

After Ou Ruoxi hung up the phone, he walked to the mirror and looked at the red and swollen eyes of crying, and smiled bitterly, really all this, isn't it because he prayed to God after getting drunk to get this opportunity?

Maybe it doesn't matter who God gave me such a chance, these things don't matter, as long as I can see this man at a glance, I will be satisfied.

The man felt like a tide in his mind, and he felt an ebb and flow.

Ou Ruoxi seriously painted a makeup for herself, and let herself wear it to make her feel the most beautiful side, I don't know why she would let men see the most beautiful side, for so many years, it can be regarded as their more formal relationship with a single disciple, no matter what, anyway, I sold myself to the devil tonight.

When Ou Ruoxi came downstairs half an hour later, Fei Yan could really describe this kind of thing, and looked at Ou Ruoxi very affectionately, and suddenly had a feeling of being like a dream.

Eight years ago, that is, eight years ago, Fei Yan didn't also come to his house to wait for him? At that time, he was very excited, just like the feeling now, although he had experienced 8 years in this process.

But the first love that suddenly feels like a dream and the heartbeat is still so hard to forget!

Ou Ruoxi walked towards Fei Yan step by step.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, where are we going now? What do you want to drink?"

Fei Yan looked at the lady in front of him affectionately, it really seemed like the old times in the past, maybe all this really never passed, why is his heart still so difficult to beat, maybe all this really hasn't happened......

"Let's go have a coffee, remember when we went to that place? That place is still there, and it's an old café now, and the proprietress isn't there, and his kitten is also there, and the dog is there, shall we go there?"

"Good ......"

Fei Yan walked in front Ou Ruoxi walked behind, and they went to the parking lot to get the car together, this feeling really couldn't be figured out, nothing happened.

In fact.

Fei Yan really wanted to hold Ou Ruoxi's hand gently, but he controlled it, he knew that the time had not yet come, maybe it would be when everything fell into place......