The battle did not go as expected. It looks like the alliance of the Ou-Etsu clan is about to collapse. Aizu is about to be abandoned by everyone, and Shimada, who succeeded Yamazaki after his death, has brought this news to everyone.

It is said that the Governor of the Navy, Takehiro Enomoto, had led the navy and ships of the old shogunate north from the Edo coastal road. Keisuke Otori, the infantry commander of the old shogunate, had announced that he would lead the remaining army to the Sendai Domain, where he intended to regroup and concentrate his superior forces to fight the new government forces to the death.

At first, the Turkish side opposed this decision, believing that it was necessary to respond to the Shido and loyalty of the Aizu Domain and stay behind to defend Aizu. However, Otori was emboldened like never before, and as the governor, he ordered the Shinsengumi to go north together in search of an opportunity to make a comeback in order to better respond to the loyalty and sacrifice of the Aizu domain.

And, he finally said, this is the final decision of Aizu Komatsudaira Yoho. Aizu had already planned to stay and live with the Aizu Domain, but he did not want Aizu to be the last battle before the fall of the shogunate.

"It is your duty to inherit the loyal, unyielding, and proud samurai spirit of Aizu and continue to carry it forward. "It is said that Aizu said so.

After learning the news, the Shinsengumi cadres reacted differently. Among them, the most active is Shannan, who was originally born in the Sendai domain.

He volunteered to go to Sendai first to make a front stop for the Shinsengumi. Although he is already "dead" in the eyes of others, he thinks that he still has some ways to use in Sendai, and the news of his death is not unexplainable and round. After some negotiations, the Turkish side agreed to Shannan's Tiyì.

On the eve of Sannan's departure for Sendai, Yanagizumi, who had trouble sleeping, unexpectedly met Sannan standing under a tree in the garden.

"Oh, oh. Shannan smiled as if he was a little troubled.

"I always seem to be able to meet you at times like this......"

Liu Quan was speechless for a moment.

Indeed, it seems that they have met by chance several times in the courtyard at night. And each experience was hardly pleasant – starting with the first one, on the night of the Ikedaya incident.

At that time, Shannan thought that Liu Quan, who was still in confinement, would not be able to participate in the mission that night, just like him, who was seriously injured and could not play. In the end, however, Yanagiizumi was summoned by Hijikata and assigned to his own team, and on the road near Shijo-dori Street, he and Hijikata beautifully stopped the soldiers of the Aizu domain and the men of Kyoto Shoshidai, who were trying to steal the credit of the Shinsengumi.

It's all a lot of good memories...... Liu Quan smiled bitterly.

"Mr. Shannan is leaving tomorrow night, right?" she asked knowingly.

Shannan jaw head.

"That's right. His voice was still gentle, as if he had never been corrupted by the madness of the rakshasas, and was still the approachable, wise, and kind chief of the Shinsengumi back then.

...... But they all knew in their hearts that the poison of the water was eroding what little sanity he had left. It may not be far off when he will finally lose his reason completely and go bloodthirsty. What's more, in the eyes of the outside world, he has long been a "dead" person. Under such circumstances, it was an extremely risky thing for him to lead the Rakshasa team to Sendai alone.

...... Why did Hijikata agree to this proposal? Is it because there is no other way to think of the Shinsengumi at the moment?

Liu Quan looked sadly at Shannan, which was still calm.

“...... Please take care, Mr. Shannan. She said in vain.

Shannan's smile looked slightly cold for some reason. Maybe there was something else on his mind, and he looked a little absent-minded.

"We're going to have a tough battle ahead...... It's you who should take care, Kiyohara-kun. He responded.

Liu Quan didn't know how to respond for a while, and after a pause, he said, "...... I've been aware of this for a long time, so I'......"

"You're such a strange person. Shannan unexpectedly interrupted her, a strange smile on her face.

Liu Quan: ?!

"Other women, at such a time, would have turned around in fear and fled...... But why don't you run away?" he asked in an unusually gentle and cold voice.

Liu Quan: "...... Huh?!"

Shannan gently pushed the glasses on the bridge of his nose, and because of this action, a strange light slipped over the lenses.

"When I saw my opponent who was difficult to defeat, I rushed forward bravely...... That's you. His gaze fell down on Liu Quan's wrist, and for a moment his expression was a little complicated.

Probably thinking that she was also injured in the arm, although she was also wrapped in bandages, but after recovering from the injury, she could return to the battlefield immediately, and she didn't have to be like him, if she didn't drink the water, she couldn't swing the knife again?

Liu Quan coughed a little embarrassed.

"Well, this is my responsibility as a member of the Shinsengumi. It doesn't matter if I'm a woman or not—"

"Wouldn't it be nice to leave like Yukimura-kun. Shannan interrupted her suddenly, "Be a gentle and good woman, live well in other places, and stop doing this kind of life-saving thing every day...... Well, but it's in vain to tell you this. You're not the kind of girl who would be happy with a hairpin, a mirror, or something cute and pretty, right?"

Hairpin?!mirror?!

This description is familiar. Yanagizumi's brain creaked for a while before she could vaguely remember what Harada had said when she declined Ikedaya's bounty.

At that time, everyone gathered in the hall to discuss this matter, and Xinba was rarely clever, and everyone who received the bounty raised money to give Liu Quan the same gift as compensation. At that time, everyone had their own opinions, and Okita even mischievously wanted to extort a high price of 50 taels from Hijikata to buy a wakasha and give it to Yanagisen, while Harada, who had always been very sympathetic to the mood of girls, said, "To give gifts to girls, you have to buy those cute and beautiful things like hairpins and mirrors."

Of course, after Liu Quan once again sternly declined, everyone later gave her a lot of delicious fruits, candies and other small snacks. One of the most unbelievable is the cherry blossom cake for ten people in Primary One. However, Shannan didn't give her anything at the time - this is normal, Shannan was unable to participate in the two battles of Ikedaya and the Forbidden Gate because he was injured, and his name was not on the list of bounties, so he did not receive a bounty, so naturally he did not need to participate in the mischievous compensation activities of these people.

But did he remember it, and what was his point in bringing it up now?

Liu Quan barely smiled.

Something she had stumbled upon suddenly popped into her mind.

"Hairpins?ah~ Speaking of which, Mr. Shannan once gave a hairpin with Chizuru-chan. She smiled and said in a casual tone.

"Sorry...... I've heard Chizuru say before.,Everyone insisted that she was in trouble during the Shimabara internal exploration incident.,She's not a regular team member.,So they each bought cute condolences for her afterwards.。 Later, I saw the hairpin, and Chizuru-chan said that it was given by Mr. Shannan, and it was really beautiful——"

Shannan:......?!

“...... Well, you really know about it. ”

Shannan was slightly stunned, then laughed and said.

That expression made Liu Quan's chest uncomfortable for some reason.

“...... I understand Mr. Shannan's feelings at that time. She said with a hint of eagerness, "That's why I'm even more reluctant to see the toxicity of the water ......erode away the gentle and attentive Mr. Shannan at that time."

The smile on Shannan's lips suddenly froze slightly.

"Gentle me...... "He said to himself.

Then, his gaze fell sharply on Liu Quan's face for a moment.

“...... That is not the gentleness that is given to you. You don't have to worry about that. He said softly but coldly.

For some reason, this sentence seemed to hit her heart, and Liu Quan felt a little sad. There was something in that sentence that seemed to make her feel a little difficult to breathe.

"It's good for anyone......" she whispered, her voice rising more and more uncontrollably.

"What I don't mind is not who Mr. Shannan's kindness will be released to, but whether such a gentle and kind Mr. Shannan will still exist in this world...... That's the most important thing, Mr. Sannan!"

She said aloud, stepping forward, her eyes eagerly gazing at his surprised face.

"The Shinsengumi have lost a lot of important people so far...... If I could, I hope I never lost more people!"

Shannan's gaze flashed, and suddenly drifted to the other side, avoiding her gaze.

"Oh, did you say that for the sake of the Shinsengumi?" he asked lightly, as if there was a hint of indifference in his tone.

Liu Quan choked on this sudden question. After a moment, she gritted her teeth and replied in a low voice, as if it were extremely difficult, "...... I say this because...... Mr. Shannan is a very important person in every way......"

Shannan raised her eyebrows slightly, slowly turning her gaze back, scanning her face as if probing.

“...... No. He concluded, "I don't matter to the Shinsengumi anymore. ”

He laughed self-deprecatingly.

"Rakshasa is a failed work...... I've learned that a lot. So far, I can't continue to study Rakshasa with all my heart, in fact, I just want to find a reasonable reason and meaning for my own existence...... After all, who wants to really be a monster and continue their meaningless life......?!"

"For the Shinsengumi, the danger of Rakshasa is probably no less than its usefulness. I am ready to sacrifice or be discarded at any time, after all, no one from Hijikata-kun down to Rakshasa truly agrees with the existence and necessity of Rakshasa in their hearts......"

"For the shogunate, the Shinsengumi had become an outcast. And for the Shinsengumi, the Rakshasa has become an outcast......" he said with a sigh, "After seeing through this qiē, you still come to me and say that I am a very important person?!"

He suddenly took a step forward, leaned close to her face, and whispered word by word, "...... It's a pity that the person you are looking for and missing, that Shannan Keisuke, has long since disappeared from this world. So, don't mention him anymore and don't go to him again. ”

"He's long dead. ...... Didn't you know this very well? Didn't you witness his death that night?!"

He approached her step by step, the cold breath of his lips blowing on her face. She couldn't help but shudder.

Tears of grief poured into his eyes inexplicably.

He said that...... It must be a thousand times more painful than I am now, right?!

In this way, he denied his original choice and the whole meaning of survival after that choice......

Mr. Sannan, what can I do to help you?

Liu Quan looked sadly at Shannan's face, which was already close at hand.

Looking at him so closely, she realized that he was actually a very handsome and gentle person.

It's no wonder that in the days of the Guardian Museum, the children and girls in the neighborhood were more willing to get close to him......

Although Mr. Hijikata is more handsome, Mr. Yamanan, who is gentle and handsome, and is so considerate and patient with everyone, seems to make people feel more likely to want to be close......

...... When did you become a rakshasa, Mr. Sannan?

...... Was it the moment I drank the water, or was it even earlier, at the Gofuya in Osaka, when the "Naked Heart Rushing Light" broke?!

"No...... He didn't die. She muttered as if in a dream, as if she was sleepwalking, and reached out her hand in a ghostly way, and actually poked Shannan's chest with her index finger.

"I know...... He's living here. ”

Shannan's body stiffened and was stunned.

He had also changed into a dress with the Shinsengumi group, a long black collared coat, only the collar and cuffs were trimmed with yellow brocade ribbons and embroidered with gorgeous dark patterns, which matched his somewhat gloomy but still gentle temperament. At this moment, his eyes were wide open and he looked at her in front of him, who was also wearing a men's dress, from behind the lenses, as if she had suddenly become a stranger.

At this moment, they were standing very close. It wasn't the first time they had stood so close together—on the night of Obon in Keio 3, they had been even closer than they were now when they met Kashio Washio, who had defected from the Shinsengumi and joined the "Guardians of the Tomb" of the Ito Koshitaro organization, on the streets.

At that time, it was she who first discovered Ghana. When she noticed Garner, the fellow stared at him from an unobtrusive corner of the crowd, as if he had become a little suspicious of his presence.

Of course, Ito Kokotaro knew the secret that he was still alive. In fact, Ito also used this as a reason to threaten Kondo and Hijikata, and he retreated from the Shinsengumi and took some of the backbone soldiers with him to organize the Imperial Tomb Guards.

However, he didn't know if Ito had told the secret to his men.

As if she were equally reluctant to take the risk of confirming the matter, once she noticed Garner's unusually suspicious curiosity about him, she wasted almost no minute in pretending to be an unusually enthusiastic female companion, and took him into a corner without a trace.

It was a very small gap between the two houses, and I thought that if I made this kind of tryst between a man and a woman, Garner would be discouraged and leave, but I didn't expect that the guy would come with him and continue to spy around them.

...... It seems that Ito really didn't tell anyone else that Sannan was still alive. Maybe he thinks that this secret is firmly in his hands, and he will have a chance to use it to blackmail the Shinsengumi one day. A well-known secret is worthless.

But at that time, that annoying Ghana seemed to think the same way. So in order to get rid of that nasty and clingy Ghana, they had to continue acting.

He remembered her frustrated sigh, her hateful glare at the traitor who had squeezed through the crowd, and then the next moment she made a very unexpected, almost momentarily calm gesture that he was so shocked that he did not know how to react - she threw herself into his arms quickly, and at the same time whispered in his ear: "Mr. Sannan, it's rude—please bury your face in my shoulder. 】

Like the determination with which she did not hesitate to make such a bold sacrifice, she spoke in a tone as calm as the businesslike tone that Yamazaki or Saito would use on a secret mission. But he soon noticed that she was trembling slightly, and was obviously very nervous and overwhelmed, not at all as calm and composed as her tone suggested.

...... No matter how much battle and bloodshed she has experienced, the woman in front of her is just a young girl.

Such an exclamation appeared in his heart for a moment.

Then, on some psychological basis, he obeyed her command without saying a word.

The Garner probably saw the hugging figures in the shadows between the yashiki from the hideout, perhaps finally reassuring that they were not the chief of the Shinsengumi and the captain, but just a pair of lovers who looked a little similar—in short, he quickly sensed that Garner had lost interest in them and quickly left.

After that, although they separated more quickly, and then came out of the darkness of the house, and continued to walk through the crowd on the street, there was always an indescribable awkwardness flowing between them. Later, they unexpectedly met Chizuru, who was also wearing a women's yukata and looked fresh and cute, so he invited Chizuru to watch the Obon night festival with them, also to avoid the awkward and unspeakable atmosphere that would continue to cause trouble and ruin the mood of the two of them.

With Chizuru joining, she really seemed to be relieved, and used a clumsy excuse that was not very clever, and left quickly.

Chizuru is a lovely girl who can't help but want to be treated gently and kindly, and who tries to protect her, and wants to see her smile. In stark contrast to her, Liu Quan is a woman who does not know how to deal with it, a woman full of contradictions and secrets intertwined with darkness and light, maturity and innocence.

Sometimes he thinks he can get to know her a little bit, but sometimes he feels like he'll never really know what she's thinking, like now.

Sendai is his hometown, and even he doesn't know what kind of fate he, a dead man, will face when he returns to his hometown as a dead person.

That's why he wanted to say something when he met her again in the courtyard tonight.

Maybe if he met someone else here, he would have been desperate to say something to them. This kind of strange affection is not particularly due to the fact that the person he is facing now is her.

...... It's not because he finally realized that she had always known about the hairpin she had given to Chizuru, so she would have this strange feeling.

Moreover, she continued to say those disgusting things that would make people feel strange.

“...... When Mr. Sannan made his decision, did he think it was the best time, or that he had to do it?"

Shannan was stunned. “...... What do you say?!"

In the moonlight, he saw a strange glow slowly rise in her eyes.

"Didn't Mr. Shannan teach me this?" she said, staring at his somewhat distorted expression, in a tone of calm and hope, "and you said to me then, 'If it is...... No matter how reckless it may seem in hindsight, it must be done without regret.'" So...... Since Mr. Shannan made that choice in the first place, then that time must be the best time...... What you do must be done......"

She choked up suddenly, paused for a moment, and then continued, "...... That's what I think. ”

Shannan was silent for a long time.

She seemed to be expecting something to say to cheer her up. But now that he could say what she wanted to hear?

“...... Please stop, stop now. ”

Words that are not under their own control slip out of their mouths.

Liu Quan's eyes widened in disbelief. Yamanan Toshixiu's face tightened, as if he hated seeing her again.

"I don't need you to be presumptuous, and I don't need you to care. If it was because I was in Osaka...... I've said it many times that it has nothing to do with you. In fact, if the people present were the same team members as Tamura-kun at the time...... I guess I might have been hurt a little harder. You've done what you can do a qiē. Please don't look at me with that disgusting, pitiful face......!"

A large number of harsh words burst out from the bottom of my heart. Shannan seemed to be unable to stop, and kept staring at Liu Quan, speaking step by step.

"Please care about the people who deserve your attention. ...... That person wasn't me. As a rakshasa, I probably don't have much time to survive...... So I'm going to use my life to clear the way forward for the Shinsengumi. That's what I'm going to do in Sendai. ”

He spun awkward, as if intending to leave, and did not seem to intend to continue to heed her futile persuasions.

"So, we don't need to say anything about each other. Only by holding the attitude that 'every goodbye is a farewell' can you survive in the Rakshasa team. I've always thought so. ”

"It's you who should take care. Your life is much longer...... One day, you'll be able to dress up again. As a woman, live well......"

"By that time, I might have been long gone. ”

"By that time, I hope you've forgotten about jì as well. ”

"Because, I don't need your sympathy or pity. ”

Shannan strode away.

Liu Quan was cold and stiff, and he felt like he couldn't say a word.

Under the moonlight, Shannan's back has passed through half of the courtyard, and it seems that it is about to disappear into the darkness.

Liu Quan suddenly came to his senses, rushed forward a few steps, and shouted, "...... Mr. Shannan!"

Shannan's footsteps froze, but he immediately tried to take a step forward, as if he didn't mean to stop to listen to her.

Liu Quan took a few more steps forward. An unspeakable impulse rose from the bottom of my heart.

"Mr. Shannan is still alive...... For many people, this fact is better than anything else!"

【...... Please take a look at this. 】

What Shannan had said to Chizuru came back to mind.

...... Why do you happen to this every time......

"Even if you drink the water, Mr. Shannan must still be the same Mr. Shannan. The original Mr. Shannan must still be alive. This has nothing to do with whether or not it becomes a rakshasa or whether it is affected by madness...... That's what I believe. ”

[In the future, when you restore your original dress, I hope you can decorate it in your hair.] 】

[At that time, I didn't know if I was still with you. Therefore, I want to give you this meager heart now. 】

He just said that one day you will be able to dress up again.

She can also hope that one day she will regain her identity and dress as a woman, and truly live as a woman, but she will never be able to change back to the original person...... Even if there was some way to suppress Rakshasa's madness, his body had been eroded by the water for too long......

Tears welled up weakly. Liu Quan's voice changed a little.

As a member of the Shinsengumi, in fact, she has already been ready to draw her sword at any time to kill Shannan, who is irretrievably saved, and has fallen into the madness of Rakshasa and cannot extricate herself. But even so, so what? Even so, it could not make her lose her last sincere hope for him, hoping that he could finally defeat the poison of the water and the madness of the rakshasas, and even in the form of a rakshasa, he would be able to live sober and dignified.

"Please live, Mr. Sannan! In any case, I firmly believe that Mr. Shannan is alive because of important reasons and significance...... Even as a rakshasa, I firmly believe that Mr. Sannan, even if he is deeply influenced by the power of the rakshasa, will also play a role that no one else can replace......"

For the most part, he has become worrisome and fearful. This kind of affection arises precisely because of the irreplaceability of Shannan. Everyone fears losing him in the battle for the power of the rakshasas, because the loss of him will cause pain that cannot be erased......

"Yes, maybe the shogunate doesn't need a Shinsengumi now. In fact, the shogunate itself is probably going to die, and no one can save it......" Yanagizumi gasped violently, and for the first time told the truth that had been buried deep in his heart for a long time, in front of others.

Sure enough, a clear look of astonishment appeared on Shannan's face.

It's not that he didn't deduce such a result, but he didn't expect her to say it so clearly and frankly.

“...... However, the Shinsengumi will definitely need Mr. Yamanan. Whether it is a rakshasa or not, Mr. Shannan will not be an outcast. Because none of the Shinsengumi would give up on Mr. Yamanan. ”

A strange expression slowly appeared on Shannan's face. He tilted his head slightly, and turned to look at the willow spring that was more than a dozen steps away from him. It seemed like a long, long time had passed, and he suddenly smiled faintly.

"You've always been so stupid that you can't stand it. He said lightly.

"No matter what you say or do, it's so unbearable. ”

"I see, you've forgotten how to be a woman, and you're doing things that aren't cute at all. ”

Liu Quan looked surprised and injured, his mouth opened slightly, and all his sharp teeth just now disappeared, and he stood in place, as if he didn't expect him to say such a thing at all.

"You are nostalgic for a character who does not exist at all, and that's the saddest thing. He said indifferently.

"Your gentleness will only bring pain to others. That's why everyone treats you completely differently than they treat Yukimura-kun. He dropped the last sentence with a sharp but cruel blow, and without looking back, turned and strode away, the figure quickly disappearing into the shadows of the corner.

Liu Quan stared at the corner of the wall where Shannan's figure finally disappeared, and the hands hanging at his side unconsciously clenched into fists, and he didn't know it when he was trembling all over.

...... I see, is that ......?

She has long realized that she belongs to the female side, which has been gradually forgotten by herself in the repeated fight with the knife. She also understands that in such an era and such an era, a woman like her, who has no feminine consciousness and the essence of gentleness and weakness, will not be recognized by this society and loved by others.

However, in the end, this cruel truth was actually told by a respected senior and boss whom she valued very much and who had spent several years with her, and it was undoubtedly a heavy blow to her.

Although in the Shinsengumi, in addition to the same team activities as the male team members, she also undertakes some daily household chores such as cooking, laundry, cleaning, etc.—well, these things are always undertaken by the Shinsengumi members in shifts, and even joining a Chizuru has not been able to completely free everyone from the heavy household chores—in the end, is she still defined as a woman who has forgotten her true self as a woman?

When she first heard Shannan say this, she thought that she would be so sad that she would not shed tears in her eyes. But now that I think about it, I feel that I really have no tears to shed.

He just told the truth. Those worries that have always been entrenched in the depths of their hearts, the fears and realities that they dare not face tenaciously suppressed in their hearts, that's all.

It was only the last time he met her before he set out on a dangerous road full of unknowns, and he honestly told her what had failed. In the final analysis, if it weren't for Shannan, maybe no one would have pointed out to her so frankly why she had reached such a point and was still in danger of being abandoned at any time.

A wry smile slowly appeared on her lips.

"But now...... Isn't it too late for me to rediscover true tenderness, Mr. Shannan? ”

She said to herself, knowing that no one would answer her question in the empty courtyard.

“...... Like, I'm going to have to go on like this without being cute. She whispered in a slightly exclamatory and joking tone.

"After all, as a member of the Shinsengumi, cuteness can't make me live one more day. Her tone gradually changed from low at first to a little brisk, and the last sentence even came out with a certain overly brisk tone.

After saying this joking remark, she even tapped her forehead lightly with her right fist, as if she couldn't do anything about it, she looked up to the sky, smiled self-deprecatingly, and then took a step and left the courtyard.

After she was gone, there was a dark silence in the courtyard, as if no one had ever been here, and no one had ever left a deep sigh here.