Coriander's natal name is Lu Lin, and she also has a twin sister named Lu Lang.

It is said that when the mother first gave birth to them, there was no one around, so she took one from each of the two characters Linlang, the sister is Lin, and the younger sister is Lang.

Full of dazzling eyes, the two of them are the whole world of mothers.

......

It is hard to imagine that this prosperous and luxurious international city has such a dirty and dilapidated alley.

Because of the continuous rain, the traces of water on the ground have not disappeared. Heaps of garbage are everywhere and give off a disgusting smell. From time to time, you can still see dirt on the ground, which has turned black because no one has cleaned it for a long time.

Lu Lin lives here.

Where there is a home, there is no work, and where there is a job, there is no home.

The hometown can't accommodate the body, and the other country can't accommodate the soul, so there is wandering.

Lu Lin never thought that she belonged to this city, and she had always been very clear that she came here for the purpose of just eating a meal.

Indeed, there is the charm of the ten-mile ocean field here, the flow of people and traffic here, and the bustling city that never sleeps.

But none of this ever showed her, not even once.

At least that's what Lu Lin thinks.

Don't try to take shortcuts. This was the last thing Li Yu said to her.

But how can you become famous if you don't take shortcuts? How can you make a lot of money?

She didn't know what else she could do?

Do you really want to go out and sell it, as they say?

"What should I do?" Lu Lin murmured.

All this seems to be attributed to Li Yu's unkindness, why does he have to understand the amorous feelings, why doesn't he tell himself his identity?

But all this seems to be blamed on him, he is too anxious and self-inflicted.

She wants to make money and become famous, and she has really reached a crazy level.

Being slapped in the face, ridiculed, and even abused every day, she can accept it.

But she couldn't accept being terminated and banned, because it deprived her and even their whole family of the right to live in this world.

Did she do something wrong?

She didn't know, but what she did know was that her mother had to endure too much alone.

For her, the word mom will also touch her heartstrings just by calling it.

She never had the impression of her father in her mind from birth, and her mother never mentioned anything about him, and her understanding of her father was pieced together from the words of her neighbors.

They told themselves that their mother was a well-known beauty in Shili Eight Villages, and when they reached their age, everyone who went to the house to propose relatives would step on the threshold of the family.

Among them was my father, who was still the director of the town's supply and marketing cooperative.

At that time, for my grandfather's family, the director of the supply and marketing cooperatives was a big official in their family's cognition.

So my grandfather, a submissive countryman, seemed to have encountered a great blessing and readily agreed.

He thinks that his daughter will never suffer with them as she does now.

But after my mother got married, I found that my other half, who I had never met, seemed to be a bit of a drinker and a lot of gambling.

How dare my mother dislike it, three from four virtues, etiquette often belonged to the basic lessons of girls in that era. In this way, the diligent and smart mother won a lot of praise.

Especially when the pregnancy test came back and learned that it was twins, the whole family was happy and harmonious.

But God likes to make a joke on you, telling you what "unpredictable circumstances are".

On the day he and his sister were born, when my father heard that they were two girls, he went out of the door with a gloomy face.

The patriarchal thinking of grandparents is even more deep-rooted, and before they came to the hospital, they heard that it was a girl, and they carried it back as they were.

The mother who had just given birth was left alone on the sickbed wiping her eyes and tears, and the pain of being pregnant for ten months was not as good as one ten-thousandth of the desolation in her heart.

The helpless mother could only ask the doctor to call her grandfather, and her grandparents, aunts and uncles rushed to the county seat overnight.

My grandfather, who was called "the second old wrong" by the villagers, squatted outside the ward, smacking a cigarette bag and pot endlessly, sighing.

The pungent grandmother scolded, shouting "There is no one like their family" and "looking for them", and scolded the eight generations of the ancestors of his father's family.

The young aunt also burst into tears when she watched her sister and child crying on the hospital bed.

The honest uncle is still thinking about how to make his sister not angry at her in-law's house, and is ready to visit her grandfather with --- grandfather, the pillar of the family, the next day, to apologize for the big mistake of "giving birth to a girl" to her sister.

Perhaps it was my grandmother's curse that took her life, as my father was killed by a whizzing truck on his way home on his motorcycle after getting drunk at night.

From that night on, all the burden of the family fell on my mother, and I heard them say that my mother smiled beautifully.

It's just that in my impression, my mother laughs only a handful of times, and the most recent one is the day my sister's admission letter came down.

The supply and marketing cooperatives were banned, and the grandfather became an ordinary farmer, farming to make a living, making the family even worse.

There is not much left of tens of thousands of yuan in compensation after completing my father's funeral and paying off foreign debts.

I still remember that during the Mid-Autumn Festival when I was six years old, my mother took me and my sister to visit my grandfather's house, but they were kicked out of the door.

Inside the closed door, I listened to my grandmother, who had always been very good to my mother, and said viciously to her: "You still have the face to enter this house? Don't you know how my son died? You are a dead star, you hurry up and take your daughters to get away, you killed my son......

Outside the door, her mother's lips were tightly closed, tears flowed down her face, and she and her sister were at a loss, so they could only help their mother wipe and wipe it.

Divorce, find another one?

At that time, it was regarded as the most deviant thing, how could the strong mother endure the gossip of the village people and point fingers.

I had a big fight with the matchmaker who came to the door to propose marriage for the lame man in the village, and after throwing out the gifts I brought, no one came to the house to talk about matchmaking.

Since the age of 22, the year she gave birth to herself and her sister, her mother began to work day and night: before she was confined, she put herself and her sister at her grandmother's place, went to work in the cotton factory during the day, and pasted lanterns for others at night.

Now in her 40s, her beauty has long been eroded by the years, leaving the most beautiful traces: her temples have spotted gray hair.

It's not the crystal clear silver hair described in the book, but it's full of withered and old age.

The sorrows of life often make her frown, and the furrows on her forehead are the marks of the wind, frost, snow and rain of the hard years. The face is full of wind and sun, and there is no radiant and red face, and some are just yellow and thin.

The hands are full of thin cuts, and when they are slightly touched in cold water in winter, they will turn into terrifying blood channels.

When people reach middle age, their bodies have been slightly blessed, and they can't see the lovely shadow of Fang Qing back then.

Yes, Mom has endured too much.

On the day my sister received the notice, she had actually received one in advance, but she chose to hide it.

Mom can't afford it, and she, as an older sister, should help share some of it.

After coming out, I found out that she was really useless.

Where have I seen the strangeness in society since I was a child, money is everything to them, life is thinner than paper, it is their family.

With money, my mother doesn't have to work hard, with money, my mother can eat and dress well, and with money, my mother and sister can really live.

Lu Lin was sad.

She didn't know if she was right or wrong, and she knew she needed money when she saw her mother screaming silently at night because of the pain she had left behind when she was younger, and she desperately endured it.

Otherwise, my mother could only endure the pain and sweat, reluctant to take a little pill, reluctant to get sick, and reluctant to rest.

She clearly remembers the only scene she had since she was a child that made her mother angry.

The village chief's daughter lost her expensive pencil case and framed her sister, and the arrogant girl called her companion to block the two sisters in the toilet.

Looking at her sister Lu Lang's swollen face, she was still so stubborn that she couldn't say a word, and Lu Lin didn't know where she had the strength to break free and kick the stunned girl into the dung tank, almost drowning.

Afterwards, the village chief came to the door, and the mother made herself kneel on the ground and whipped herself with a slender willow branch, and she didn't cry, she cried.

The pot-bellied man shouted hideously: "Li Yuexia, you stay with me for one night, let me be the cheap father of these two rabbit cubs, and this matter can be settled!"

My mother was crying, and I and my sister were crying, and the three of them hugged each other, helpless.

In the end, my grandfather, who had always been aggrieved and honest, carried a kitchen knife and blocked the door of the village chief's house, and the matter was over.

She wanted to share some of the burden for her mother, from handing out flyers to waitresses, from shampooing girls to mall sales.

Step by step, where there is more money, take a little more.

She has no academic qualifications, and her high school diploma is really a useless blank sheet of paper in today's society, what can she do?

I have also met a young man with clear eyebrows and beautiful eyes, and I have a past of "the mountains have trees and branches, and the heart is happy and you don't know", but she seems to be lively but has low self-esteem, and she has never mentioned it to anyone. That sunny boy may also like himself, after all, he never dares to look at himself, and the only time he communicates with himself, he and himself are both blushing, but what does it matter.

Love is the most expensive luxury for yourself, and you don't deserve it.

Every time she knows a luxury brand, it is her heart's desire for a better life, every gift she receives is a pill from her mother or a little living expenses from her sister, every makeup, every hot dance, is a big gamble on her future.

This accident has nothing to do with right or wrong, there is only the girl's ambition or ideal.

This is a big gamble, a gamble with a back-to-back battle, she can't tolerate herself to lose, her mother's body can't tolerate herself to lose, and their family can't tolerate themselves to lose.

Therefore, she would rather leave behind her morality, her dignity, and the basics of being a human being, so that the balance of victory will tilt slightly in her favor.

But God joked again, and she lost.

To lose, is to have nothing.

She hesitated, she was confused, she was helpless.

It's true that she was in too much of a hurry, but she really didn't want to wait any longer.

She needed money too much, and then lost herself,

Die of desire, probably.

She regretted it, regretted it.

You shouldn't be in a hurry, you shouldn't fall, you shouldn't forget your roots.

That's it. She thought, in fact, it's good to be a waiter, and the live broadcast is too easy for her to lose herself.

It wasn't until after hitting the south wall that people realized that it really didn't work.

Now Lu Lin is like this, she finally really understands what the teacher taught them before: the result of rushing is failure.

The road must be taken step by step, the meal must be eaten one bite at a time, and you can't always think of eating a fat person in one bite.

At this moment, she realized that she was wrong.

No matter what the reason, she should not let go of her conscience as a person, and she should not let go of her minimum dignity.

If she had the chance, she would like to tell that person in person, I'm sorry, I was wrong.