Yu Xiang slowly pushed the wheelchair to Tao Jingjing's side, stared at Tao Jingjing's eyes and said.

Tao Jingjing did not deny what Yu Xiang said, but she had doubted it, but because of her grandfather, and then what her father told her when she died, don't let yourself care about these things, as long as you live your own life and take care of your grandfather, anything else has nothing to do with you, you really don't care about these things, don't think about these things, feel that you just need to take care of yourself, take care of your grandfather, and then do what you do, even if it's over, what others have to do has nothing to do with you, but you ignore the desire in your heart to seek the truth, and your own unhappiness。

"That's right, because Xiao Xiche himself has already found out his doubts, I just don't know some information, and I will find some information to confirm my thoughts, or to confirm my doubts about the information provided to me by Xiao Xiche. ”

"In this way, you and Xiao Xiche, you have been in contact for a long time. Lin Ziyu stared at Tao Jingjing with a smile and said, as if he knew some special information.

As soon as Tao Jingjing saw Lin Ziyu's expression, she was really speechless, she definitely knew what this person was thinking, but she also knew that what this person was thinking was absolutely impossible.

"What do you want!"

"What do I think? I'm just telling the truth, did you and Xiao Xiche have been in contact for a long time, and that dinner was not me calling you to go, and your first meeting was the first time you met in years? Right? You tell me a positive answer. ”

Tao Jingjing actually couldn't figure out that she and Xiao Xiche had met after returning to China for so many years, and which time did they meet? Tao Jingjing recalled the only few times they met, but she couldn't remember which time they met or which date.

"Gee, I don't know which one counts which time. ”

"You don't know which time is counted, so you have been strong many times, do you often contact each other in private? You give me an honest explanation, and you talk all day long that the two of you have nothing to do with each other, and it doesn't matter, is this still okay?"

"It's all said, it really doesn't matter, at least I don't think we can have anything to do anymore. But I still thank Xiaozhuang, at least in the matter of my father's time, the information he provided was of great help to me, no matter where he got this information or other sources of information were legitimate or not, but the information he provided made me know the truth of some things, at least the true thoughts of things that I didn't understand before. ”

"What didn't you figure out?"

"Yu Xiang, Ziyu", Tao Jingjing looked at the two of them, and said very solemnly, "I used to think that what others told me was the truth, especially my aunt and my grandfather told me, I always believed in them, and now I still believe in them, but I feel that I have grown up, and I am no longer the child who hid under the wings of my father and grandfather all day long, I need to have my own judgment, I can't live in a mess every day, I need to know the real truth." ”

"What is the real truth?"

Yu Xiang's voice was ethereal, and he suddenly and silently pushed away the wheelchair, turned around, and stared out the window with his back to Tao Jingjing and Lin Ziyu.

In fact, when I talked about it today, when I talked about these words, Tao Jingjing was also very strange, how could she say these things at this time, especially when Yu Xiang was still in the ward, and she didn't understand some things at all, but since some things were said, since some things were mentioned, there was no way back for herself, and it was facing Yu Xiang and Lin Ziyu, Tao Jingjing felt that she had no need to hide it, after all, if she did something later, these two people would know sooner or later, not to mention that she didn't want them to feel that they had hidden it, let alone that they had betrayed them。

"Actually, I don't know what the real truth is. I only know how stupid I used to be, I fell in love with the people who loved me the most, the people who cared about me the most, and I also hurt those people, but although I am not strong now, and I don't have any ability, I also know that I can't be like this, and then what happened at that time has been kept in the dark, even I can't let myself live in chaos like this. ”

"It's not that you don't want to live a chaotic life, but Xiao Xiche is back again, right?"

Hearing this, Tao Jingjing really wanted to laugh, but felt that she might not be able to laugh either.

"Xiao Xiche is back, but what does it have to do with me when he comes back?"

"He came back, and it just gave me a stronger reason not to let myself be like this anymore, not to care about anything, not to think about anything, to live without thinking all day. ”

Tao Jingjing couldn't help laughing at her ignorance and cowardice.

"Did your grandfather know about it?"

Yu Xiang said the key point of the problem at once, and when it came to this, Tao Jingjing couldn't help but feel a little lacking in confidence.

"I didn't tell my grandfather, I'm going to look into these things. Tao Jingjing said very frankly.

"Don't you know, then, if your grandfather knew, he wouldn't agree?"

"I know he will disagree, at ten o'clock when he can not discuss with me, hide from me, and secretly make decisions by himself and my aunt, after a few years, it is even more impossible for him to take the initiative to tell me why he did an autopsy for my father in the first place, and even my father once did an autopsy, I don't think he wants me to know. ”

"Then why do you have to look into these things, don't you know that your grandfather is hiding from you for a reason? He probably doesn't want you to be in any danger, or to worry about anything. ”

"I just know he's hiding it from me for a reason. And this reason must be that he thinks about me for the sake of me, so he will do this, but Yu Xiang Ziyu, you also know that I have been chaotic over the years, in fact, it is not that I have no ideas in my heart, I can tell you very frankly, I have a lot of doubts in my heart, a lot of I don't understand, but it is because I am afraid that my grandfather and they have made those decisions for my good, aunt, the decisions they made are for my good, even my father, everything they have done is for my good, it is because they are for my good, so I don't know how to deal with this good, and then I can only work in the direction of their good for meBut I'm not happy, I'm not happy, I'm constantly thinking about it, I'm constantly anxious, I don't know what these things I do today, what will happen tomorrow? I don't have any concept of life and goals. ”

"Then you have a concept now, you know how to live now, do you know what to do?"

"Nope. Tao Jingjing said and couldn't help laughing at herself, although in the past she always felt that she was living in a daze, and always wanted to figure out some things by herself to make her life simpler, but when she made up her mind to figure out some things, she didn't know how to live in the future, and what direction some things would take.

"Then what's the point of doing this? Why do you have to go to the trouble of finding some unpleasant memories of the past, every day, peacefully, don't think about anything, don't do anything, isn't it also good? Isn't it good to find someone to marry and have a well-behaved child, and find a husband who loves you, and then the last thing is like this? So that your grandfather will not have to worry about it, and your father's wish can be fulfilled, and you will live a very peaceful and stable life, isn't it good for everyone?"

"Yes, how good is this kind of life, isn't this the kind of life I once dreamed of? Get married early, have a handsome husband, give birth to a well-behaved child, my parents are by my side, my grandparents are also by my side, I can go to my parents to eat on Monday, go to my grandparents to eat on Tuesday, change every day, and wait until the weekend to take my children and my husband to find a quiet rural life in the past few days, this is the life I once dreamed of. ”

"Once upon a time?"

Yu Xiang looked at the lights outside the window alone, and muttered that his dream was also like this, the years were quiet, and his family was healthy, but the world has changed, who would have thought that he was now accused of being in this small world, what he wanted to do, what he wanted to do, was limited to this world.

"Isn't it possible to realize your dreams now, why do you have to find out everything that has long passed, why do you have to carry heavy shackles now that you can have the happiness you could have had?"

Yu Xiang turned around and asked Tao Jingjing word by word, in fact, he also asked himself, why, why, why......

"Why?", Tao Jingjing smiled bitterly and smiled, "Actually, I also want to know why, why I don't let myself go, why so many people tell me that it's okay to live your own life, but after so many years, I thought I could, I did it myself, but I found that in fact, I couldn't do it at all, really, Yu Xiang, I can't do anything, don't care about all this, in the past few years, Yu Xiang, you don't know that every time I wake up in the middle of the night, I always feel inexplicably frightened, unknown fear, and panic...... I want to ask you, if it were you, Yu Xiang, what do you think you would do if all these things happened to you, would you be able to treat everything as if nothing had happened?