Stick to the promise of marriage Zhang Baotong 2019.3.18

The promise of marriage can be expressed in many ways, but marriage itself is a promise made by the person. This commitment is made in body and mind, for a lifetime and for eternity. This kind of commitment is to give one's body and mind to each other completely, and to love each other and never abandon each other, regardless of life and death.

Whenever a couple gets married, we are all moved by the scene of them holding hands and answering the wedding celebrant's question about the marriage vows. However, whenever someone parted ways because of a quarrel or because they didn't want to be patient, one can't help but wonder how their vows and promises at the wedding were so fragile and unable to withstand the wind and waves.

Whether it's because of a quarrel after marriage or a seven-year marriage, the divorce rate has been on the rise, and the momentum is unabated. With the exception of a few exceptional divorce cases, the vast majority of divorces actually do not have much significance. Divorce itself is a violation and violation of our pre-marital promises, and it makes our commitment so sacred and important in this life and this life seem so pale and powerless. If such promises can be broken, then what promises can we make in the future?

Such a promise may only be made once in this life, and if this promise is not fulfilled, then when the promise is made again in the future, the confidence will be insufficient and the heart will be empty. The ancient Chinese called a man who keeps his promise a gentleman. When Han Xin was down, a drifting mother gave him food, and when Han Xin left her, he told her that he must come to repay her in the future. Later, Han Xin became the king of Chu, did not forget the old kindness, and offered a thousand taels of gold to drift his mother. Jing Ke agreed to Prince Yan's request to assassinate King Qin, risked his life, and went to the soup for Prince Dan without hesitation. You can see how great the power of commitment is.

Robin Sharma, author of the international bestseller The Monk Who Sold Ferraris, said, "Neither your intellect nor your circumstances will ultimately determine your success in life; "Commitment is a signal sent by the energy precipitated and accumulated in our hearts, and the fulfillment of this commitment requires us to stick to the belief of the heart, the goal of life, and keep fighting, to adhere to self-discipline, cherish time, be kind to others and be based on the present. These rules of success all involve keeping promises. And the power of commitment will lead us on a journey to discover our hidden strengths, to discover the gifts we must share, to reveal the lives we are destined to experience.

The person we promise to love and protect should be the person we are inseparable from each other in life and death. Although we have quarrels, irritability, resentment and anger when we get along, it is like after a rainy or stormy day, the sky will get better, the wind will be beautiful, and the sun will be shining. Whether we marry him or her, we have promised that we will not leave him or her because of poverty and sickness, and even less divorce because of quarrels and anger.

Interestingly, the richer the place, the higher the divorce rate, and the more developed the place, the more divorced people. The main cause of divorce is not rich or poor, but emotional incompatibility; the characteristic of divorce is not that the man abandons the woman, but that the woman voluntarily wants to leave. This exposes the drawbacks of divorce in modern society. Women's demands on men have increased significantly as a result of their improved social status and stable economic income. A man can't abandon a woman just because she's in a weak position, and a woman can't empathize with her because she's in a strong position. The commitment to marriage is two-party, the commitment of marriage is unconditional, and the stability of the marriage can only be guaranteed if both parties keep their promises.

There are indeed many worries and helplessness in marriage, and when two birds fly together, the two birds may be inseparable. However, when one bird flies far away and the other bird stays where it is. The two birds will inevitably be separated from each other. The two crickets fought together all day long, and after a long time, they became enemies. There are also birds like cuckoos, which always lay their eggs in other people's nests and let others help hatch them. It's not a headache. There are also dislikes of the poor and loves the rich, flashy vanity, likes the new and hates the old, red apricots out of the wall, etc. People don't focus on commitment, they focus on pleasure. Because of pleasure, people become selfish, impatient, and treat marriage as an electrical appliance, and once something goes wrong, they don't repair it slowly, but simply replace it with a new one. They only want the other party in the marriage to be the one who is good for them, not the one who is not good for them. Because self-interest is important, promises become dispensable.

People's commitments have become weak because social integrity is no longer valued. In the past two years, there has been a wave of "guarantees" in society, with the promise of abnormally high returns to deceive investors to join, and more than 200 million people have been victimized. This example shows how far integrity has come in modern society. Even if there are thousands of problems encountered in marriage, they should not be a reason for divorce, nor should they be a reason for breaking promises and breaking promises. A person's integrity is related to a person's character, and the commitment of marriage is related to the integrity of both parties to the marriage. Why did the bride refuse the wedding because the groom's family did not send a sports car to greet her? Why did a man want to get rid of his wife just because he had some money? Didn't they promise and promise to be on good terms with each other for a hundred years? When they fell in love with a young and beautiful woman, they wanted to change their wife, and when they fell in love with a rich man who was rich and powerful, they wanted to divorce their husbands. Why is this kind of breach of promise and conscience so common? On the one hand, it exposes the sadness of social integrity, and on the other hand, it also exposes the low moral conscience of some people.

Commitment is not only a kind of integrity for us, but also a guiding light for our life. It drives us to do what we should do, to work hard and be responsible for life. We must make solemn promises for ourselves and for others, and solemnly fulfill our promises. If we fail to deliver on our promises, we should not.