Seven years of itching Zhang Baotong 2017.1.13

The "seven-year itch" generally refers to the fact that people may feel bored and bored in the seventh year of their love or marital life due to the dull regularity of love or marital life, reach the burnout period, and experience a crisis test. Pen @ fun @ pavilion wWw. ｂｉｑUｇE。 info Extramarital affairs, affairs, and stealing may occur. Once the crisis is passed, the relationship can develop in a benign and healthy direction, otherwise, it may cause the two to part ways, fall apart, or even separate. But a United Nations statistical yearbook involving 62 countries, regions and nationalities shows that the fourth year of marriage is the peak of divorce. A survey conducted by a university in Pennsylvania, USA, interviewed a total of 4,000 couples and followed them for 20 years, the results showed that 14 years after marriage is an important juncture in the love life of couples or couples, and many men and women parted ways after living together for 14 years. As for those couples who have successfully survived the "fourteen-year itch", many of them have thought of divorce, but because of their children, financial problems and a sense of responsibility for marriage, they have stayed in married life.

In our lives, not only marriage and love have a "seven-year itch", but also our work careers, hobbies and ideals. Looking back, I have had three ideals in my life, one is to be a middle school teacher, the second is to become a professional table tennis player, and the third is to become a writer. Of the three ideals, a middle school teacher is at the top of the list because it is a profession that not only allows me to earn a living from it, but also allows me to play ball and write while teaching. In other professions, it is difficult to guarantee that I will be able to play and write, because some units don't even have a table, let alone play and play. And some jobs make you work shifts day and night, how can you have the heart and energy to write quietly?

Under the conditions at that time, it was impossible to become a professional table tennis player, and to become a professional player, you had to start learning to play from the age of five or six, and you had to have a high-level coach to guide and train. But I was just learning to play from a book. Therefore, this ideal is completely wishful thinking and cannot be realized at all. But it became a hobby for me.

I wanted to be a middle school teacher when I was just starting secondary school. At that time, I was in my second year of junior high school and started learning to play. Our homeroom teacher is the person who plays table tennis at the highest level in the school. He used to play with us, so I thought that the middle school teacher was really good, and he would be fine after class, and he could play, unlike other jobs, where he worked eight hours and was not allowed to play during eight hours. A teacher's job is to prepare lessons, teach and revise assignments, all of which I enjoy. Unlike in a factory, work is purely a kind of manual labor, and there is no meaning at all. Later, after graduating from high school, I went to the countryside and became a laborer again, but in my spare time, I read books and wrote about things I liked. Later, when the college entrance examination began, I applied for the teacher college and studied English. After graduating, I worked as an English teacher in secondary school.

When I first arrived at secondary school, I was full of enthusiasm and enthusiasm for my work, and I had the energy to make a career and achieve a lot of success. However, after working for less than a year, I felt that it was difficult to be a middle school teacher, because of the pressure of the college entrance examination and the year-end assessment, and the competition and struggle between teachers were fierce. I can't teach high school because I graduated from an English major, but if you can't teach high school in middle school, you're inferior. Therefore, I studied hard, passed the high school teacher professional examination, and obtained the professional certificate of high school teacher. At that time, the professional qualification examination for high school teachers was very difficult, and hundreds of secondary school teachers in our district took this kind of examination, and very few of them finally obtained the certificate. I was the only one in our school who had obtained a certificate. Then, I studied at Shaanxi Normal University for three years and got a bachelor's degree. I'm not worried about the competition at the business level, but it's hard to teach students in ordinary middle schools. In particular, the school gives you one or two bad classes, and almost all the students in the bad classes don't like to learn English. There is a British proverb that says: Teaching those who don't love to learn is the hardest thing in the world. Therefore, English teachers are most afraid of teaching ordinary classes and poor classes, because the main energy of your class is not to teach, but to maintain classroom discipline. Every time I finish a class, my throat hurts, because you have to keep scolding and reprimanding to make the class quiet. Even if you are assigned a good class, the polarization of students is severe, with one student wanting to learn and another already giving up. The students here are too long-winded, the students over there shout that they don't understand, and some of the students keep talking. It makes you feel very bad and feel a little powerless. So, I really don't want to be a middle school teacher anymore. So, I started to practice writing in my spare time, trying to become a writer. Seriously, I think being a writer is my true ideal and goal in life.

So, I started practicing writing in my spare time. Actually, I don't know much about literature and writing, I just read some books, and I write something in imitation of other people's article formats. For about three or two years, I started contributing to literary magazines and newspapers. Fortunately, the first time I submitted a short novel called "Naming" to "Chang'an", it was published, and then, I submitted a very short manuscript to "Xi'an Evening News", which was also published. So, I set myself a goal of submitting one long article and two to three thousand-word articles a week to newspapers and magazines. As a result, many manuscripts were published. After an article titled "The Scenery Is Picturesque" was published in the "Xi'an Evening News", it was published as the first article by the "Reader". Soon, I was transferred by the Railway Education Commission to the Propaganda Section of the Party Office to be responsible for news reporting. In the past seven or eight years of working in the Education Commission, I have written hundreds of articles on news reporting, published nearly 100 short stories, essays, essays and translations, and written two or three long stories, but they have not been adopted.

Later, because the railway education department was to be transferred to the local management, I was transferred to the local school as a secretary. During this time, because there has been no big breakthrough in writing, and the secretary's work is trivial and complicated, he has no heart to write anymore. After a thirteen-year hiatus from writing, I took a back seat from my post the year before last and took a break before I started writing again and signed a contract with Qiqi Chinese. When I first signed the contract, my writing mood was still relatively high, and I spent the rest of my time writing except for two or three hours in the afternoon. However, after writing for a while, the mood and interest slowly became low, because I started writing without pay, and later became a VIP contract writer, but because I wrote a short essay, I have to write one every day, and there are some difficulties in terms of subject matter and quality, and there are not too many people who like to read short essays, and the click rate is not very high, plus I have a fixed salary every month, and I don't live on it, so I often have contempt and slackness. Sometimes I really don't want to write any more. At this time, a voice will sound in my heart: persevere, this is your life's ideal. Even though I knew I wouldn't be a well-known writer and wouldn't make a fortune, I had to stick to my ideals. If I give up on my last ideal, what value and pursuit will I have in life?

I had three ideals, one that was shattered early because it was unrealistic, and one that I gave up voluntarily after 14 years of pursuit, and only writing keeps me going. Looking at each and every one of us, who does not have their own ideals and pursuits, but how many of them can be successful and famous? This is the case, because of various reasons, many people's dreams are either shattered or they give up, and in the end they are only left with a dream and a sigh, empty-handed.

Yes, there is a "seven-year itch" in our marriage and love, as well as in our careers, hobbies and ideals. When I was in school, I often heard young teachers who had just started working sigh and say that they wanted to retire as soon as possible. As soon as one of my students entered the train station and started selling tickets, he shouted that the ticket sales work was too hard and tiring. But these jobs are all chosen by themselves, and some are even their ideals. Not to mention teaching and ticket sales, every job in all walks of life will produce boredom after a long time. People desperately want to be the boss and the president, but when they really become the boss and the president, there are a lot of annoying things. This is in line with what we often say: what to bother. For example, if there are two retired professional table tennis players in our unit, their level is really much higher than ours. If they want to compete, they can win the championship casually. And there are a lot of games in Xi'an, and some of the games have a prize of thousands of yuan, but they don't say they don't participate in the game, they usually don't even play the ball, every time the unit plays a game, it is the leader who sends a message before they start looking for a racket to find shoes, and they don't practice, they play directly on the field. This is in stark contrast to those of us who practice every day and often play games.

I remember when I was a child, I learned a fable, about an animal to learn to fish with the osprey, after learning for a while, I felt that this work was too difficult to do, so I went to follow the magpie to learn to build a house, but I didn't learn for long, I felt that this work was too simple, nothing to learn, and then I followed the hound to learn to hunt, but I felt that this work was too dangerous, and finally went to follow the rabbit to learn to make holes, but I felt that this kind of work was too tired, and I didn't want to learn. In the end, nothing came of it. In fact, many of us are like this, no matter what we do, we only have three minutes of calories, and we have to change jobs before we have been doing a job for a long time. In the end, I don't know what expertise and specialty he has.

We are amazed when we see the expertise of ordinary and great craftsmen, but who knows how much time and effort they put into this work? Whenever we see the wonderful competition of the athletes, we are amazed, but who of us knows how much they have paid for it? Picasso struggled to the death without seeing his own success. Before Wang Xizhi wrote "Orchid Pavilion Preface", he dyed a pool of clear water into ink. This is the power of the iron pestle into a needle, dripping water through the stone, no wonder Edison would say: success is 99% sweat and 1% talent. Some people have done surveys and statistics, and those scientists who have won the Nobel Prize are not because of how talented they are, but because they can study and research tirelessly for decades.

It can be seen that most of the reasons why people are unsuccessful are because of the lack of iron pestle into needles, perseverance and endurance to drip water through stones, and give up pursuit and ideals. Similarly, the real reason for the "seven-year itch" is not entirely because the marriage went wrong, but because people are tired of their marriage, and have the idea of liking the new and disabling the old and abandoning the old love. This is a genetic emotion inherent in human emotions. In this way, if he can become an emperor, who would not want to have three palaces and six courts? If he can choose without any consideration, how many people will love his wife again? People give up their pursuits and ideals because human beings themselves have a strong inertia, are afraid of hardship and tiredness, are indulged in leisure and hard work, and indulge in pleasures. If a person can enjoy himself, who will endure hardships and stand hard work and work hard? In fact, there are many people who are angry and strive for pleasure, so once the situation changes, they will give up their ideals.

The "seven-year itch" is an excuse and reason that people make up for themselves to change their marital status, and similarly, there are all kinds of excuses and reasons for us to give up our ideals and pursuits. With excuses and reasons, we can have peace of mind and a clear conscience in whatever we do. However, it only takes the blink of an eye to give up an ideal, but it takes a lifetime of perseverance to stick to an ideal. Why do people live? They should live for their dreams. If we live just for the sake of living, what is the meaning of living? Therefore, we should stick to our ideals and persistently pursue them to make people's lives more exciting. (To be continued.) )