In the third hospital, Han Xiaoguo reported the company's reply and had already communicated with the hospital.

Hearing the news, Bu Fan was excited with a trace of apprehension, and only after experiencing despair did he know what it was like for leukemia patients.

Healthy people don't understand, except for one exception among healthy people in the world, that is, Bufan, who felt the gloom and despair in the hearts of leukemia patients through the system.

This time, he has to communicate with the leukemia patient from the perspective of a third party, talk to the Grim Reaper, disrupt himself and then reorganize himself to become a "real leukemia patient".

Han Xiaoguo secretly took Bu Fan to the hospital that had been contacted in advance, and found the contact doctor, who asked that he could not take pictures and record recordings, but could only chat.

After several negotiations, Bu Fan finally met a young patient, who had just been diagnosed with leukemia.

Refusing to be accompanied by Han Xiaoguo and the doctor, Bu Fan came to an open space in the hospital alone and had close contact with a leukemia patient for the first time in a real sense.

"You're an actor?"

After listening to Bu Fan's introduction, the patient Xiao Tian looked at Bu Fan curiously and asked, "Why are you chatting with me?"

Bu Fan sat next to him, without the slightest concealment, and simply introduced the movie to be filmed, and said sincerely: "The director hopes that the whole society can pay attention to the problem of difficulty in seeing a doctor, especially for serious patients, my character is also a leukemia patient, I took the liberty to talk to you today, and then integrate it into my performance, I want to act more naturally." ”

Xiao Tian's eyes lit up, and a rare smile appeared on his pale face: "I like Director Qu Zheng's movies very much, since this is the case, don't hesitate to ask!"

Bu Fan took a deep breath, pondered for a moment, and said, "I'm sorry, I may have to unravel your scars again, if you have any discomfort in the process, tell me directly, okay?"

Seeing Xiao Tian nodding, Bu Fan said seriously: "Then start with you knowing the condition, right?"

Hearing this, Xiao Tian's bright smile shook his hands slightly, and after calming his mood, he said quietly: "I remember that it was May 8, when I was close to the age of twenty-five, and I was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia M5 for the first time. Speaking of this, Xiao Tian suddenly fell silent, silent for a long time, and then slowly recalled in a low voice: "I only saw this disease on TV before, and when the doctor told me the results that day, I couldn't figure it out when I was killed.....

"Isn't it just a cold and fever, why did it become leukemia!"

"Doctor, did you make a mistake?"

Xiaotian smiled bitterly: "This sentence may be my most instinctive and powerless way to save myself at that time, but the miracle did not happen, the doctor's answer is yes, and the cancerous cells have invaded the bone marrow, and the transplant is my only hope to live." ”

"I remember vividly that 15 days later it would be my twenty-fifth birthday..."

Bu Fan stared at the other party's face, although he couldn't record it, but he felt the change in emotion with his heart.

When I first entered the scenario simulation experience, when I knew that I was sick, the situation was basically the same, mainly shock and anger.

How is it possible? How can I get sick?

Why? Why does God play such a joke on himself? Why is it that among the thousands of people in the world, it is he who is sick?

Why did I not steal or rob, I worked hard every day, and I was full of kindness to life, so why did this disease fall on my head?

After accepting the reality, emotions must find a change, and this is the point of experiencing life.

"To this day, I have done my 8th chemotherapy treatment. After speaking, Xiaotian slowly took off his hat, his original black hair is now thinning and thinning, and the few remaining likes are also yellow and forked, and after a while, Xiaotian put on his hat as if he was resigned to his fate, and said with a wry smile: "If you want to come to the next chemotherapy, you will be completely bald!"

Bu Fan was silent and couldn't open his mouth, he wanted to speak but really couldn't think of comforting words, at this time not only was his mouth blocked, but he also felt that something was blocking the blood flow in his heart.

Bu Fan could only listen calmly....

Xiao Tian put on his hat again, a little cold and flu can be fatal, and said calmly: "Every time I pack my luggage and go home to recuperate, I say goodbye to my patients, when I will see you next time, and whether I can see you or not, in fact, we don't know." ”

"The oldest person in the ward was in his 70s and the youngest was 11 years old. Since last year, I have sent 12 patients away, two of whom I watched people go...."

At this time, the wind began to wind on the lawn unconsciously, for Xiaotian's safety, Bu Fan helped him back to the hospital corridor, and after the two of them sat down again, Xiaotian continued: "Thank you! I remember the first time I was hospitalized, I was arranged in bed 13, and an old grandmother was in bed 15, and my face was pale and I didn't eat or drink. ”

"I was so overwhelmed by the environment in the ward that I never dared to look at this old woman, so I could only cry and apply for a change of ward. As a result, as soon as she came out of the ward, the grandmother left the next day. ”

A wave of despair shrouded Bu Fan, in front of him was just a young man in his early twenties, the same age as himself, life had just begun, but now he was about to face death?

At this moment, Xiaotian finally couldn't help it, his eyes were red, and he choked up: "The first time I was discharged from the hospital and went home, the streets were full of people, and there were people in a hurry everywhere, and everyone was working hard for the future." ”

"I look at the world outside the car window, and compared to them, I don't dare to think about where my future is, and maybe even no future at all!"

"Why me?"

"I'm just an ordinary peasant kid!"

At the end he cried out loud.....

Bu Fan hugged each other tightly, words no longer had any effect, he only hoped that the warmth of the hug could give him a moment of comfort.

For a long time....

Finally calmed down, Xiao Tian patted Bufan with his hand, slowly stood up and said, "I'll take you back to the ward to sit down." ”

Room 18-35 on the fifth floor of the inpatient department, 24 beds, to be honest, Bufan's first feeling when he entered the ward was that the ward was very dark, the curtains were tightly sealed, and the air was filled with a certain pungent smell of medicine. There were also three patients who were very curious when they saw outsiders coming.

"Are you really an actor?"

"Is there really a director who wants to film us with this disease?"

After listening to his intentions, everyone was very excited, for them, Bufan's visit was like a force, so that the dead silence was forgotten for a short time.

Xiao Qian, who was only eighteen years old, was the most excited, and said excitedly: "Don't look at my young age, I have lived for five years from the age of thirteen to the present!"

"It's a pity that I'm not an actor, otherwise my experience would definitely be a good movie to tell!"

Everyone burst into laughter, and Bu Fan had a rare opportunity to contact more patients, so he hurriedly asked.

Xiao Liu drank saliva and said with great interest: "A chemotherapy treatment takes four to seven days, two bottles of medicine every day, one bottle takes six hours, and the number of grams of medicine is also selected according to the patient's height and weight. ”

"After my first chemotherapy treatment, I didn't listen to the doctor's precautions, which led to esophageal and lung infections, and large ulcers in the mouth, gums and tongue. In order to eat, I can only ask the doctor to prescribe anesthetics, and after paralyzing my mouth, I can only drink some liquid food while crying, which hurts!"

Then I slowly got used to it, and after the third chemotherapy, the body's reaction suddenly became obvious, nausea and retching, hair loss and peeling, and the nails would inexplicably break off when they were halfway long. ”

"At the beginning, the indwelling needle became PICC, which simply means that a tube is implanted from a vein, 6 cm is exposed, and 49 cm is implanted to reach the major artery of the heart, so that the damage to the blood vessels of the whole body is relatively small. ”

After speaking, he pointed to the thin arm full of needles, and laughed at himself: "At that time, it was as if something had taken away the strength, and the whole person was like a frosted eggplant..."

"Completely wilted!"

Bu Fan carefully wrote down, this is a very important mental state, Lu Chuanjun in the movie is also an old patient who has been fighting for many years, he must have experienced this treatment process, and his body directly affects his mental outlook, this time it was not in vain.

Xiao Tian interjected: "It hurts the most when you are doing chemotherapy, it hurts so much that it makes you cry, and hundreds of needles are directly pierced into the bones, and the feeling is worse than death." ”

"Every time I wake up, I spend every day in giving up and persevering. I really want to live, I don't want my parents to send black-haired people...."

"An 80-year-old grandfather, a 70-year-old grandmother, a 55-year-old father and mother, plus a girlfriend who has been inseparable from me for less than a year..."

"Although we will slowly accept the final result in our hearts, in the face of family affection and love that we can't give up, I..."

At this point, everyone fell silent, and the entire ward fell silent. Bu Fan didn't speak, and quietly experienced, the most intuitive feeling is two words:

Despair!

Although you can face death head-on, but when it comes time to see you, why not?

People are sometimes strong, sometimes they are fragile, and they are more helpless, nostalgic, and reluctant.....