Reconciling Zhang Baotong 2018.8.5

People know that family affection is more important than money, but in front of his father's inheritance, the sixth child still can't help but want to monopolize it alone. Although he knew that once he did this, he would become enemies with the first five brothers and sisters, but he also thought that he could take some measures to slowly resolve the conflict with them afterwards and reconcile again. So, after his father was buried, he picked up an axe, smashed his father's cabinet, took away the passbook and ID card of more than 400,000 yuan that his father had accumulated in his life, and transferred the money to his own name.

After the five elder sisters found out about this, they were extremely angry, scolding the sixth brother for doing too much, not a thing, and vowed on the spot to cut off the relationship with the sixth brother, as if there was no younger brother. In fact, the sixth couple are both railway employees, with salaries and houses, and the 400,000 yuan is dispensable for them, and it does not affect his life at all. However, offending their brother and sister made them feel a little uncomfortable, first, a kind of immoral psychology has been pressing on their hearts, and second, the brother and sister often gather together and do activities, which only excludes their family, making them feel very lonely and embarrassed.

So, they dug out their hearts and tried to reconcile with them. However, no matter what they did, everyone refused to forgive, and later, they had to make some sacrifices and privately give each of their five brothers and sisters 20,000 yuan, so that everyone finally forgave them. In this way, he was finally able to go to his father's grave with everyone, and he was able to spend festivals, meals, and gatherings with everyone. However, although everyone reconciled with their family, they always kept a lukewarm and not close distance from them in terms of feelings and attitudes, which made them feel very uncomfortable and incomprehensible. Moreover, it seems that this estrangement and distance cannot be eliminated at all.

Whether it is in the family or in the workplace, there are many things that fight for power and interests, and turn against each other one after another. However, because after fighting and turning against each other, we still have to live and work together, so we still have to meet and smile and reconcile. It's just that this reconciling is very different from the previous feeling of reconciling.

In the past, there was a section chief who transferred me from the school to a department of the Education Commission, and I was very grateful to him, worked diligently, and served him. However, when the organ was adjusting the cadres, he secretly pressed me in order to promote another person in the department, and reported to the secretary that I was not thinking properly and refused to write a report for the secretary. As a result, I was left behind by that cadre adjustment. At that time, I was angry and had an emotional relationship with him in front of everyone. However, we all worked in the same department, and he was the section chief, so we were reconciled again. However, this kind of reconciliation is only a superficial phenomenon, in order to let the leaders and colleagues see that the people in our department are still united and harmonious, and we all know that the result of contradictions can only be a lose-lose situation, which is not conducive to mutual work. However, there are contradictions and resentments hidden in our hearts.

I'm never divorced, so I can't remarry you. Some of the people I met and knew were divorced, but most of them did not choose to remarry, but married another woman. Two or three of them were divorced for two or three years, and later, I don't know if it was because of their children or for other reasons, the two remarried. I asked them why they were thinking about remarrying. They all sighed, saying that they were not very satisfied with the women they met, and because of the child, the woman had been waiting for him, so they had to remarry. When they say this, they show the helplessness and sadness that they have seen life through. In fact, they regret remarrying, but since they have finally remarried, they can't divorce again. Regarding remarriage after divorce, I still have a preconception that if two people can divorce, there must be very serious problems, indicating that there is serious or obvious discomfort and incompatibility between the two people. Since there is a serious or obvious misfit and unsuitability between the two people, they should no longer live together.

Some people refer to remarriage as "reunion after breaking the mirror", but the original meaning of reunion is that separated couples are reunited and reconciled as before, and it does not refer to the remarriage of divorced couples. The reunion of a separated couple is fundamentally different from the remarriage of a divorced couple, and it feels very different. The reunion of separated couples is an unexpected joy and sorrow, while the remarriage of divorced couples will have some hesitation and helplessness. Originally, there was no similarity between reunion and remarriage, but now people use this idiom in remarriage, so it makes remarriage have the meaning of reunion.

The biggest difference between reconciliation and reconciliation is that one is out of true affection, the other is out of helplessness, one is intact and the other is rift. For example, the two best friends who grew up together have been inseparable day and night for many years, and the two are as good as one person. One day, A brought her boyfriend in love to show B. The boyfriend is not only handsome and chic, but also very talented. However, the boyfriend and B fell in love at first sight and felt that B had snatched his boyfriend away. But B thinks that her boyfriend is in love with her. The two turned against each other for this. However, later, B felt that her boyfriend was distracted, so she broke up with her boyfriend. Soon the two girlfriends reconciled again, thinking that if it wasn't for B's intervention, she would have married that boyfriend a long time ago. And B felt aggrieved, thinking that her boyfriend was chasing her, and felt that A was a small-bellied chicken intestine. Although the two often bump into each other and talk and laugh, they are only at odds with each other.

I know a middle-aged woman who divorced her husband because she was secretly in love with a boss. However, after the divorce, the boss never divorced his wife, she kept urging the boss to divorce, but the boss always made up all kinds of reasons for her. In the end, she saw that her boss didn't really want to marry her, so she had no choice but to beg her husband to remarry. Although the two remarried, the two parties are no longer the same feelings of mutual trust and love.

There is an old Chinese saying: The major events in the world must be divided for a long time, and they must be divided for a long time. There is another famous saying in China called "After the calamity, the brothers are here, and when they meet, they smile and enmity and enmity". But after a long period of reconciliation and reunion, feelings and feelings are definitely no longer the original brotherhood and husband and wife love. Two people can be brothers or husband and wife, completely relying on a pure and true emotion. This kind of brotherhood and husband and wife love are interdependent and intimately connected. If there is no major conflict of interest and conflict, it will not be easily dismantled and interrupted. If this conflict of interest is greater than brotherhood and conjugal love, then they will turn against each other because of it. Even if they are reconciled later, it will be the same as a broken mirror reunited, and even if the two lenses coincide together, they are still fragments separated from each other, and the rift can no longer be bridged.

Therefore, two good friends or colleagues, or a couple who love each other, must not conflict because of some interests, if this conflict of interests is really unavoidable, the two can be harmonious and fair and just to do a gentleman's dispute, and must not use those calculating means to secretly cross the warehouse or take advantage of it. As a husband and wife, it is even more important not to damage the relationship because of certain interests and conflicts. Human feelings are very pure and transparent, and they are also very sensitive and fragile, and they cannot tolerate a little deception and harm. Therefore, it is completely undesirable to insist on seeking benefits regardless of the hurt feelings. Think about it, friends and husbands and wives are often our confidants and lovers, and the source of our joy and happiness. And usually taking a small loss or getting a little cheap will not affect our daily life, so there is no need to tear up face with friends and lovers for a little benefit. If you want to lose them for some benefit and turn against them, it is to pick up the sesame seeds and lose the watermelon.

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