Beijing's subway, as always, is a sea of people, and He Dukang is just an ordinary drop of water in the sea.

He Dukang is Chinese New Year's Eve five today, and he hasn't bought a house yet, but he bought a car early. He said that the days are still long, so why be in such a hurry.

Tian Hui was an accident.

Thirty years ago, in a mountain nest, in a mining disaster, the boss ran away, He Tianzhuang's work injury was not treated, his wife ran away with someone, and He Tianzhuang kept drinking all day long. Ten years have passed, and He Tianzhuang was unable to extricate himself from immersion in the wine jar and suffered from liver cancer. Knowing that he would die soon, he took pesticides in the most comfortable sleeping position in the middle of summer when he was so quiet that there was no frog chirping. At the age of fifteen, he changed his name and admonished himself.

He Dukang doesn't drink, the only nightclub he goes to is a company party, and he orders a glass of orange juice, which is particularly conspicuous. He doesn't have any special hobbies, he never gets cigarettes and alcohol, he goes home from the company's vegetable market every day, three o'clock and one line, and he doesn't go to the party if he can, but he has a very strange habit, looking at the map. He has a lot of maps, provincial, municipal, map of China, map of the world, maps of various countries, he said, he is no longer like me can go out and explore, he also said, he is very envious that I can choose my own future. He said that he collected so many maps to find the woman he loved and hated. I'm not good at comforting people, but I always inadvertently provoke others to grieve. He saw my guilt and always asked me to drink, but he only drank orange juice, and I was always drunk by him. He doesn't drink, but he always has a lot of wine at home, white, red, yellow, all sorts, but I prefer the boiled wine from his hometown.

In order to make up for my mistake, I specially invited him to a meal and brought Tian Hui with him. They were like blind dates, and the three of them didn't like that kind of restrained scene, so they just sat there straight, and the atmosphere was very awkward for a while. I'm as drunk as ever, Tian Hui and I are childhood sweethearts, and she has the key to my house.

I woke up in the middle of the night and the living room was still brightly lit and they were chatting. Tian Hui was also a little drunk, propping her head on the sofa with her hands, constantly adjusting a comfortable posture. It was the first time I had seen him say so much. When he took out his map, Tian Hui stopped moving. He pointed to a point on the map: "This is my home, it used to be." Tian Hui used a blue pen to mark a particularly conspicuous point on the map full of red dots: "It will be the same in the future." ”

After that night, their relationship was a little ambiguous, and when we went out to dinner together, I sat alone. When I went shopping, I became the one who walked behind them. When I went to the supermarket, I was in a cart.

22 July 2016

In autumn, the weather began to get cooler, Du Kang found me alone and asked me to Shichahai, where he asked me why she didn't agree to him. I was stunned, he thought I was thinking about how to answer him, I thought he would have a lot of questions to come, and then we were all silent. He confessed to her on the twenty-first of July. On July 20, Tian Hui "disappeared" that day.

On July 20, 2016, the weather was cool in late summer and autumn

She went to the hospital for a follow-up, she had a bad heart, it was inherited in the family, and her mother didn't live past the age of thirty, I know that. Later, at her house, they met, and Du Kang waited at her door for a day, in fact, I knew, but I didn't tell him, because Tian Hui wanted me to keep it secret. But what I don't know is that he confessed.

"Where have you been today. "I don't need to report to you where I've been. ”

"Come in. ”

"I'm sorry. ”

"Hmm. ”

When she came home, he was spread out in front of her house. The moment he saw her, he must have been very excited, I had this experience, when I was a child, I looked for a toy all day, and then crushed it when I went to bed.

"Drink water, I'm sorry. "Tian Hui looks haggard, this is also my guess, but it should be, she is like this every time she comes back from the review, I am used to it, so I didn't accompany her to the review later. Du Kang said that it was him who should say sorry, but I don't think they should say it, none of them are sorry for anyone, he is worried about her, she is in a bad mood and is yelled at. Du Kang didn't leave that night.

The next morning, Tian Hui went to work early, and I asked Du Kang for a leave, I thought he was still in Gentle Township. He got up and looked at the quilt beside him, and he knew it wasn't a dream. After seeing the text message that I helped him ask for leave, he stayed in bed for a long time, probably with a smile on his face. I walked to the kitchen, finished eating the breakfast left by Tian Hui, and went to buy gifts. Because the night before he saw her ID card was today's birthday. He asked me what Tian Hui liked, and I said Tian Hui liked to sleep. Later, I also thought that it was her birthday, and I was worried that Du Kang would buy her a bed for her.

I forgot to tell him that Tian Hui never had a birthday, and that when she was eight years old, the doctor gave her death verdict, saying that she would not live to be thirty years old, and she would never have a birthday, and she said that her birthday was a countdown to her death.

This year, she is twenty-eight.

"You're back. Dukang jumped up to her like a child, and the moment the door opened, he jumped out of the couch where he had been there for an afternoon. In fact, he is a very stable person, at least I have never seen his impetuous and childish side, in the three years I have known him. When Tian Hui told me, I kept making up for his childish side in my head. He took her bag and put it away, took her hand and walked to the kitchen, making her close her eyes.

"Happy birthday!" The moment she opened her eyes, Tian Hui saw the gifts on the table and the cake with candles, and she was stunned. Called me: "How old am I?" "Twenty-seven eight, what's wrong. "I vaguely guessed. She gently put down her phone and looked at Du Kang, she was very strong and rarely cried, but I often got drunk and crazy in front of her. Du Kang later told me that it was the first time he had seen her cry.

That night they were lying flat, and when Du Kang lay down, her tears fell even harder.

If you don't explode in silence, you perish in silence. Calm as Du Kang could no longer endure this silence with a faint sob: "Let me take care of you in the future." "I bet it's the best love thing he's ever said, because I can't think of such a dumb man saying such things to a girl. She sat up and looked at him with a hint of mockery in her eyes.

22 July 2016, morning

I had just eaten breakfast and was about to go to work, and I received a call from Tian Hui: "He will look for you today, let him die." "We don't like crap, our exchanges are very brief, for example, I don't know what she meant by the second half of the sentence, but I didn't ask, and when the time comes, I'll know.

Time returned to Du Kang and asked me to Shichahai, and after silence, I ordered a glass of "Demon", which is the recipe of bartender Lin, which is very soft in the mouth and strong in the aftertaste. Du Kang looked at me, waiting for my answer, Lin gave me the wine, I played with it in my hand, Du Kang also moved his eyes from my face to mine, I smiled playfully and tilted my head to look at him, he snatched the wine, and took a sip. I asked him, "Don't you never drink?" "The glass of wine was ordered for him, and I'm as confident as ever. He put down his glass, coughed a few times, looked up and continued to look at me, and I said let him die. He was silent.

Someone downstairs was drinking and making trouble, he was still staring at me, I also looked at him playfully, and Lin also calmly lowered his head and mixed wine. After a while, the police car came, the ambulance also arrived, and carried away the one lying on the ground, there was a woman next to me who had been crying, I quietly took the second glass of wine handed by Lin and took a sip: "See, she is afraid that you will be like that woman, she is afraid that you will be the one who is carried away when you see her." "I decided to tell him anyway, otherwise it would be too unfair to him.

His pupils narrowed, and he returned to the same way he had been for 10,000 years. That's right, we're all very lazy people, and we'll die if we're too lazy to say a word. He continued to stare at me and motioned for me to continue, I put away my playful expression and took a long sip of the liquid in my hand: "She's running out of time, yours is running out of time." The first sentence was told to him, and the latter sentence was a reminder to him.

He looked down and thought about it, then looked up and asked me, "How much does it cost?" "The operation will cost about 15 to 250,000 yuan, the famous hospital will cost about 500,000 yuan, and the postoperative surgery will cost about 8,000 such rejection drug treatments every month, don't think about this, she won't agree." ”。 He didn't even ask what time was running out, but it was expected, if it was someone I liked, I would have thought about how to make the final struggle, and I wouldn't care why. Tian Hui told me that when the time was almost up, she would go on a trip, and if she felt that she couldn't do it somewhere, she would call me and ask me to collect her body, donate all her organs, and scatter the ashes from the plane.

I never thought I'd be crazy about anyone, and maybe neither did Dukang. But God is always joking with us, every game has its own rules, and we are all participants in the rules, being played by the rule-makers, from what we gain to what we lose, when we meet each other, different games, the same rules, and the ending is roughly the same.

23 July 2016, morning

Passing by the street corner that I have to pass by every day, I bought the same breakfast: "Boss, today's sugar pancakes are not as sweet as before." "Joked to the boss, sitting in the position where he sits every day, the boss smiled and asked me to go early tomorrow and leave me a special polysaccharide with a special polysaccharide. "It's so cold, it's just autumn, and this winter should be very early. "The boss brought me a bowl of bean juice and said something in passing. I sniffed and nodded. yes, it's really cold today.

"She resigned, the lock on her house was changed, and the landlord said that she left those things as a memento for the landlord, and the rest of the rent was reserved for the next tenant, you must know where she is, right, you must have a way to contact her, right, I beg you. "I went out on the balcony and he followed me out. I took a hard puff of my cigarette, snuffed out the cigarette butt, and patted him on the shoulder: "Die." "As soon as I turned to leave, he grabbed me and punched me, his eyes were red, and I could see that he hadn't slept well last night, or that he hadn't slept well. It's a good thing he didn't have a white head overnight, otherwise it would have scared me to death, but I really want to see if the legendary white head is true.