March 20, 2004 Light rain

I actually envy Meng San.

Because everyone understands injuries differently.

Meng San's understanding of injury is the feeling that the world collapses in an instant. There will be strong winds, there will be torrential rains, and there will be apocalyptic despair.

And my wound is like a magic knife, no matter the sky is clear or the rain is pouring, no matter whether everyone is reveling or in the dead of night, it will always come out of nowhere and cut me. It's shallow, and it won't hurt your heart.

That faint sadness can even make you want to stop.

I don't know if I'm a masochist like this, but honestly, it's an amazing feeling.

Because it always reminds me that I'm still alive......

However, I still think that the heart-rending pain is more able to make people wake up in time.

And I, like this, can only be slowly cut by it.

So when I saw the drunken Meng San lying on the ground, my heart also became sad.

A week ago, I completely understood that it was not love between me and Shen Sijia, it was just my wishful thinking.

A week later, Meng San also completely understood that the relationship between him and Fang Yiran was also not love, but her temporary need.

Fang Yiran's breakup words to Meng San were not "You are a good person", but "You are a stupid".

Utter stupid, this is my evaluation of Meng San, but I didn't say it in front of him.

All Fang Yiran needs is a "fool" who can help her get through the difficulties.

The senior sister who had been bullying her changed schools, so Fang Yiran no longer needed a "stupid" to protect her.

So Meng San was "stormy".

This night, I accompanied him to drink, accompanied him to scold by the river, accompanied him to lie down on the river beach, and accompanied him to drench in the rain......

Meng San's face must have been tears instead of rain, because he cried quite really.

For a moment, I thought that this big man I had thought was lying about his age to go to school was really just a big boy.

Taking advantage of Meng San's earth-shattering cry didn't attract Uncle JC, I quickly pulled up the big boy.

Gone, back to school. I say.

Not back. Meng San wiped a handful of snot and said.

Where are you going if you don't go back to school?, I asked.

Let's go, go to the Internet café at night!" Meng San took out a handful of change from his trouser pocket and said drunkly.

I don't even know how to go online!I said.

Neither will I, MD. Meng San scolded and said, don't be afraid, you won't go to school!

So the two of us moved from the river beach to the Internet café.

Seriously, this is the first time I've been to an internet café by myself.

Growing up so big that I had never been exposed to a computer game, it was as if I had discovered a new world.

One night with Meng San in the CS LAN against people until dawn.

Maybe the boys are really talented for this kind of game.

The two of us, who just learned how to turn on the machine, actually learned how to play CS in one night, which is not amazing. Especially Meng San, who was drunk, suddenly sobered up as soon as he started playing the game.

But what's even more amazing is that we also found that the chat software interface in the Internet café computer can be replaced with an "indescribable" background image.

So while the night was not over, the two of us stared at the picture called "GIF" for nearly an hour.

It wasn't until the eyelids really couldn't be raised, and somewhere really couldn't be lowered, that the two of us walked out of the Internet café in a daze.

March 21, 2004 Light rain

Meng San's injury is estimated to be better.

A night of play therapy seemed to make him completely forget about a woman named Fang Yiran.

So he came to me again to go to the Internet café for the night.

I'm not going, I said.

I don't want to drag my tired body through the fence behind the school tomorrow morning.

Don't you want to watch "GIF" anymore? Meng San's eyes lit up.

I swallowed, then looked at him and said, ......

What "GIF"?

Zhen Songni suddenly appeared next to us and asked.

We both turned our heads to look at her, then at each other again.

Nothing, nothing...... We both spoke in unison.

Li Muyang, can you come over for a moment? I have something to tell you. Zhen Songni didn't ask anymore, but said to me.

Meng San walked away with a sense of humor.

You don't have to tell me about Shen Sijia, I'm not interested. I say.

What about Ran Chongshu? Zhen Songni said.

Chongshu?

I'm a little happy, what's wrong?

He wrote to me yesterday.

What did he say? I couldn't wait to ask.

What's the matter, are you interested?" Zhen Songni suddenly laughed.

That's for sure, that's my brother. I say.

In the letter, Takaki first expressed his thoughts about us, and then talked about his current situation.

He and his mother have settled in City E, and he is already studying at City E No. 2 High School.

Takaki said that this world is like this. When you think you already have happiness, there will always be various accidents that will take it away.

The happiness in his heart is to have a group of brothers who are good with him, with wind and rain but also laughter.

Of course, it would be even happier if he could have a girl he liked by his side.

I don't know if he is referring to Zhen Songni, but the "sister-in-law" in his letter must be Shen Sijia.

"You and your sister-in-law should be well, and I will come to see you when I return to L City. Just give me a big hug when the time comes, man!"

The last sentence of the letter reads.

If it weren't for Zhen Songni on the side, I would have cried when I saw this sentence.

It's not because he still thinks Shen Sijia is my girlfriend, but because of his brother.

But on second thought, this kid is not authentic, and it's not that he doesn't know my home address, even if he writes me a letter and sends it to the school.

Zhen Songni saw my dissatisfaction and pointed to the back of the letter.

So I flipped it over.

"I know you'll say I'm a friend who is heavy on color, haha, save paper, save stamps. I want to say to you what I want to say to you on a piece of paper, isn't there no way......?

The letter also states his current address and the classes at the school.

Needless to say, this kid is still waiting for our reply.

So I returned the letter to Zhen Songni, and I started to write a reply when I picked up my pen.

But after thinking about it for a long time, I didn't hold back half a fart.

What I wanted to say to Chongshu in my heart, I forgot it all as soon as I mentioned the pen.

"You big Shabi!" I just wrote these five words, and I didn't know how to write them.

When I looked up, Zhen Songni was still sitting there looking at me.

She burst out laughing.

I thought you were so eloquent? What's wrong?

I...... I just forgot to write a pen......

I also said look at what you write, it's not quite what I imagined. Zhen Songni said with a smile.

I was about to argue when I suddenly remembered that I had written her a love letter in the first place.

So the words stopped.

Zhen Songni also seemed to notice something, so she blushed and stood up.

You write it, and I'll go back and think about how to reply to him......

Watching her go back to her seat, my heart suddenly felt a little sour.

Zhen Songni, Shen Sijia, Chongshu, and me, the four of us have happened so much in more than a year. To this day, I don't know how to deal with my relationship with Zhen Songni.

We are friends, the most ordinary kind.

That's all......

March 22, 2004 Sunny

The reply to Takaki was finally written.

It's nothing special, it's just to scold him first to show my dissatisfaction with him for not saying goodbye.

Then I explained to him what happened between me and Shen Sijia.

I said, I don't blame Shen Sijia. It's just that I blamed myself for being deeper than she was......

Eventually, I told Chongshu that I had inherited his will and had become true brothers with Brother Kaede. Meng San, Fart God and others also asked me to tell Chongshu to let him find time to come back early, my brother has always been ......

My letter was dropped into the mailbox at the school gate along with Zhen Songni's letter.

To be honest, I'm curious about how Zhen Songni replied to Chongshuxin.

What did you write? So I asked her.

You want to know?, Zhen Songni asked me rhetorically.

I looked at her, thought for a moment, and nodded.

Zhen Songni suddenly approached.

I told him, I like you.

She looked at me and said with a smile on her lips.

I looked at her, not knowing what to say.

Hahaha...... Tease your ......

She burst out laughing.

You...... I was by her.

Don't worry, I won't tell him. Zhen Songni said.

I don't know if what she said is true or not, I hope she raises her noble hand and doesn't make any more trouble.

I'm not going to break with Chongshu from now on.

Those men and women things really annoy me to death.

Love is afraid of hurt, hurt is afraid of love......

I don't want to hurt anyone anymore, and I don't want to be hurt by anyone anymore......