It's another winter, and when I return to Qingmei Town again, Xiaoli almost doesn't recognize its appearance.

It's been five years, five years ago, she buried her father, every year Qingming, she only went to the monument to pay respects, but never came back, kowtowed in front of his grave, she didn't come back, she didn't dare to come back, afraid to come back, it would be painful to live without extricating herself.

Pushing open the dilapidated wooden door, the yard was covered with snow, the green plum tree was left with a lonely trunk, the room smelled of damp and moldy everywhere, and the picture of my father was placed in the center of the living room, with a straight suit and smiling eyes.

Pushing open the door of his room, the small bed, the quiet bookcase, everything, familiar and unfamiliar, Xiao Li put the luggage away, came to his father's room, and lay on his hard bed, the whole person curled up together, the room was cold and damp, but she felt warm and reassuring.

It took a morning to clean, and finally she was able to live in, she pushed out the worn-out bicycle, took out a towel and wiped it carefully, cheered up, and rode to the town supermarket, which was very tightly wrapped, and no one recognized her along the way.

After a simple lunch, and went to worship his father, Xiaoli walked out of the door, subconsciously went to turn over the bricks at the door, the key to the family mansion was quietly placed there, a little rusty, but still opened the heavy lock, pushed the door in, weeds from the growth, desolate, to the backyard, the grape trellis has long collapsed, only the swing standing in the cold wind is left, carved out of mottled traces by the years.

Gently dusting off the snow above, Xiaoli sat up, swaying, making a squeaky sound, accompanied by this harsh sound, Xiaoli finally couldn't help it, and burst into tears.

She suddenly remembered the figure of the young man, the laughter of those years, his sweaty face, his smiling eyes, and the kiss he had with her on that sunny afternoon.

All the memories came back, and the little centrifugal pain squatted down, and in this lonely and desolate courtyard, too many of the past surfaced.

Year after year, once, they ran here, laughing and playing, from being young and ignorant, to growing up later, I remember that I still had a birthday party for Cheng Zimu in this yard, at that time Cheng Zimu was wearing a white shirt and suspenders, Qu Qing and Xing Mo were wearing beautiful little skirts, Fang Yi was wearing a shabby school uniform, and he was wearing a white sportswear, several people formed a circle, I once thought that the circle would never disperse, and everyone in the circle was a lifetime.

Back in the summer of that year, Cheng Zimu gave her fifteen yellow roses, hoping that she would always smile, and they went crazy in the playground, laughing on the merry-go-round, eating cake in the sun, and it was one of her happiest birthdays.

And that night, chatting in the ruins, under the starry sky, they talked about good wishes, made naïve promises, five teenagers, dangling their legs on the high dirt slope, laughing extremely innocently.

I vaguely remember that hot afternoon, they sweated, riding bicycles, Cheng Zimu's car was running in front, they chased in the wind, and then said goodbye, on the way back, singing "I will remember your face,,,

And the face that Xiao Li dreams of every night, he stands in the sun, stands at the bottom of the stairs, stands in the fireworks, smiles at himself, and says to himself, "Xiao Li, come here." ”。

"Xiaoli, I've always been there. ”。

Cheng Zimu, time is not old before the old, you see, for our past, I already need nostalgia to comfort myself.

Cheng Zimu, if time has an ageless face, I hope it can stop on November 9, 2005, I didn't go to you, I didn't feel sorry for you, I didn't leave with you, I left my Qingmei Town, if I didn't leave, everything, will it be different, if we don't leave, will the ending be better.

There is no if, but if everything can be done again, I hope that we will always be ordinary teenagers in a small town, no identity, no mission, no sadness, no past, I love you, he loves her, we love each other, plain as water, and have no worries in our lives.

Cheng Zimu, we are not wrong, we have no intention of hurting anyone, but, there are still too many people in this world who are hurt by you and me, they are still our most cherished friends, these years, we learn to let go, learn to smile, we learn to mature, bear, and work hard to live, but after all, pain is pain, and the sequelae it brings are too great, how can we not eradicate it.

Xiaoli closed the door of the family, locked the key in the door, she didn't want to walk in again, in the future, it won't be, Cheng Zimu, let me lock everything in that door, let time bury it, but also retain its original appearance.

Put on clean clothes, take out a bag of gifts, Xiaoli rode away, passing by Fang Yi's restaurant, the door was closed, but it was clean and tidy, there was a brand new couplet pasted on the door, Xiaoli smiled, she parked the car at the door of Qu Qing's house, took a part of the gift, and handed it to Qu Qing's mother.

"Happy New Year, Auntie!".

"Is Xiaoli ,,,, Xiaoli?"

"It's me, Auntie, Xiaoqing is busy with work this year, she asked me to bring back some things, I hope you are all right. ”

"I'm busy with work, you don't have to comfort me, Xiaoqing her, I haven't been back for the New Year for many years, I know, she blames me, blames me for sending her away, Xiaoli, you see her, tell her, I ,,, now, I just hope she can be well, her happiness, in her own hands, I will no longer interfere, let her have time to come back and see. The old mother grabbed her hand and choked up.

"I will, I'll tell her. ”。

"Stay and eat, you are alone, how to eat well. ”。

"No need Auntie, I still have something to do, I'll come to see you another day, come in, it's cold, goodbye." ”。

The car continued to walk forward until it came to the door of Xing Mo's house, in the low courtyard, outside the mahogany gate, Xing Mo's younger siblings, Xiao Ze and Xiao Ya were squatting on the ground to build a snowman, Xiao Li's face was red and frozen, Xiao Li walked over with a gift, and the two children ran over excitedly when they saw her, for their father and Xing Mo's affairs, they didn't know when they were young, and the adults didn't say much, in their eyes, Xiao Li was still their good sister, like before, good to themselves, with their crazy sister.

Xiaoli handed them the gifts, there was a smile in his eyes, and he was about to speak, but he heard a familiar voice, "Ozawa Xiaoya, come in and eat cake." ”。

Xiao Li was stunned in place, Chen Yan, why is he here?