After Song Qingran finished entertaining, the assistant drove him back to Song's house, and he suddenly said, "Turn around, don't go back to the house, go to the temple." "

When the assistant heard this, he hesitated slightly: "Now?" at 12 o'clock in the morning.

"Hmm. Song Qingran closed his eyes, and his voice was low, calm and affirmative.

The assistant glanced at Mr. Song from the rearview mirror and sighed silently, he could see Mr. Song's tiredness, and he hoped that Mr. Song could get what he wanted.

*

This night, she couldn't fall asleep after tossing and turning, and as soon as she closed her eyes, everything was playing silently in her mind like a black-and-white movie, even her temples twitched faintly, and there was a faint noise in her ears.

She forcibly closed her eyes for a long time, and finally sighed helplessly, got up, found the headphones, and played a soothing music randomly.

"I don't hate you anymore. Even forgive you for your cruel reasons, when I understand that I don't love anymore, even memories are a load......"

For her now, the memories of the past are really loads, but if there is a button to clean the memories with one click, does she really have the courage to choose to forget?

In the end, she didn't know what time she fell asleep, but when the sky was only slightly bright, she suddenly opened her eyes when she was very sleepy, and she couldn't sleep at all, obviously because she didn't have enough sleep time.

She simply got out of bed, stepped barefoot on the soft carpet, opened the curtains, and looked at the foothills in the distance, misty and green hills.

She was in a messy mood, and she thought of a place where she could calm her emotions.

*

The weather in London is always wet with fog, clouds and a light breeze. Even if there is a lot of traffic on the road, there is a little less urban irritability.

On the corner of London's busiest Oxford Street, a dark red house sits quietly with a plaque at the gate that reads in sleek Chinese: "London Foguang Temple".

The temple stands out from the rest of the world, and this is the base of Master Xingyun when he preached the Dharma in Europe in 1990.

Nanbei didn't drive, and after getting off the subway, I stopped and walked along the road, and it took a while to reach the temple gate.

The door of the temple is open, the novice is sweeping the fallen leaves in the courtyard, and the distant bell is faintly heard, blowing away the fog accumulated in the early morning, and the heart slowly falls silent with this silence.

Seeing the north and south, the little novice stopped the movement in her hand, folded her hands, bowed slightly, and returned the north and south salutes, she wanted to go to the palace to ask for a lot.

Nanbei asked, "Is the master there?"

Xiao Shami said calmly: "The master is here, but the master is busy at this time. "

Nanbei planned to go to the temple first, if it wasn't for the fact that time did not allow. She also wanted to stay at the temple for a while.

The temple was very quiet, and after walking around the north and south, she didn't see anyone, so she turned around and walked towards the hall.

The wind passed through the hall from nowhere, the prayer flags moved with the wind, the bell rang softly, Nanbei raised his eyes, and without warning saw the man kneeling on the round cushion with his back to her. The man was dressed in black, with a straight back, a slight hanging head, and a slight curvature of the neck.

Nanbei never thought that she would see Song Qingran here, her eyes widened slightly, what is Song Qingran doing here?

Nanbei subconsciously took a step sideways, and saw a book spread out on the low table in front of Song Qingran from the side, which should be a scripture, he lowered his eyelids, stared at the book intently, his thin lips moved slightly, and he read in a low voice.

Nanbei stood still for a while, not moving, she remembered that Song Qingran did not believe in Buddhism, and the few times she had come before, it was under her entanglement that he would accompany her with a blank face.

I didn't expect him to take the initiative to appear here now. What is he here for, seeking a career, or is it marriage?

Song Qingran's voice reciting the scriptures was small, she couldn't hear it clearly, and she didn't want to see him, so she didn't hesitate, and immediately turned around and walked out of the hall.

She just walked to the corridor, and the person she bumped into was the master, the master had kind eyes, he had been teaching the Dharma in London for more than ten years, and he had come from the north and south many times before, so even though she hadn't seen her for many years, the master still recognized her at a glance.

The master folded his hands and greeted: "Good donors from the north and south." "

Nanbei took a deep breath and smiled: "Hello master." "

"I haven't seen you in a long time. The master lowered his eyebrows.

"Hmm. "

The master glanced at Nanbei behind him, and knew that Nanbei should have met the benefactor inside, and the master knew about the entanglement between the two people, but he didn't say anything, but Nanbei hesitated and asked, "Master, what is Song Qingran doing here?"

The master's voice was calm: "Atonement, Lord Song has been chanting in the temple for several years in a row. He paused, then added, "For his child, who didn't have time to come into the world." "

The pupils of the north and south shrank suddenly, and she was stunned for a while. He looked back at the main hall in a daze.

The master continued: "Most of the maintenance expenses of the temple over the years have come from donations from Lord Song, who was sincere, and he came to the temple in the middle of the night last night to stay and chant here before dawn. "

"In his early years, Lord Song had too many karma, was emotionally depressed, and was riddled with illness, and after taking refuge in my Buddha, he devoted himself to ...... Buddha."

Her eyelashes fluttered, her fingers hanging at her side curled down, her red lips pursed, and she didn't say anything.

The master's eyebrows were kind: "The female benefactor must have asked for something when she came to the temple, right?"

Nanbei came back to his senses: "Well, I want to ask for a signature." "

The master nodded, led the north and south to the side of the hall, the temple was silent, the fragrance was faint, the north and south knelt on the mat, closed their eyes, shook the stick holder, and their thoughts were disturbed, and after a while, a bamboo stick fell from the tube.

She opened her eyes, and the Master bent down and picked up the stick for her.

Nanbei stood up, and the master quietly looked at the words on the sign, his expression calm, and he was stunned for a while. He put away the sign and said quietly: "Female donor, you still need to tie the bell to the bell, if you can't forget, you won't forget, and if you don't forget, it's the best thing to forget, you don't have to be too entangled in the past, the deceased have already arrived in Elysium." "

Nanbei lowered his eyes, moved his lips, and didn't say anything.

*

The north and south received the sign. After putting on the incense, after asking for peace charms for Bo Yan, Bo Yue and Yan Yu, he was about to leave, passing by the corridor of the main hall, and saw Song Qingran standing under the prayer flags in the corridor, the prayer flags were moving, his black eyes were deep and far, staring at her quietly, probably due to lack of sleep, and the corners of his eyes were faintly scarlet.

Nanbei noticed that his legs were not as straight as usual, and the suit pants at his knees were slightly wrinkled, he should have been kneeling for a long time, and even his body was dyed with a strong fragrance.

Neither of them spoke, Nanbei pursed his lips, realizing for the first time that Song Qingran had also been burdened with guilt all these years.

He was a sinner, but also a victim.

There was a fog in front of Nanbei in front of her eyes, she sniffed lightly, not knowing what to say, these years have passed, and neither of them has stepped out of the past.

Maybe really, you can't get out.

Song Qingran asked, "Do you have a fast meal?"

Nanbei didn't answer, but just asked, "Aren't you not a believer in Buddhism?"

Song Qingran lowered his eyebrows, his thin lips moved, the lines of his eyebrows were gentle, and he said lightly: "Be in awe, I'd rather believe it." Not credible. "

Nan Nan seemed to pull the corners of his lower lip mockingly, Song Qingran was not like this before, he only believed in himself, and he didn't believe in these things that seemed completely ethereal to him.

Now he would come to the Buddhist temple in the middle of the night and get up in the morning to chant sutras.

Nanbei looked away and whispered, "Not all sins can be forgiven. "

Song Qingran knew what she was talking about, and his Adam's apple moved lightly: "I know, I didn't want to forgive myself." "

He just thought that if there really was another world, he wanted that child to be good.

He just thinks about it, to atone for his sins with his life, even if his sins can't be atoned for, he just wants to be by Beibei's side, as long as he looks at her, his chest will be hot, and his heart will be soft, he is so obsessed with this feeling, he wants her. Such thoughts have haunted him for more than twenty years.

When Nanbei met Song Qingran, she couldn't control the thorns all over her body, as if she didn't hurt him, she felt uncomfortable, she said lightly: "Mr. Song is ruthless, and he can be ruthless to his wife, he drove the Yue family out of England, and imprisoned his wife, why force himself to believe in Buddhism?"

Song Qingran didn't have any obvious anger, he sighed softly: "Beibei." You know, my wife is you, Jiang Sheng is not my wife, never has been. "

Nanbei raised her eyes, her anger was slightly obvious, thinking that this was a Buddhist temple, she suppressed her anger: "Have you asked me what I mean?

"I'm sorry. Song Qingran quickly admitted his mistake, "Beibei, I did it wrong before." It's me who is too selfish. "

"Selfishness" was originally a word that the north and south wanted to accuse him, but now he said it first, and she was speechless for a while, not knowing what to say.

Nanbei didn't want to entangle with Song Qingran anymore, she wanted to leave, Song Qingran also followed behind her, and a little novice chased after her and shouted softly: "Master Song stayed, you forgot to bring your scriptures." "

Nanbei glanced at the scriptures, only to find that this was a manuscript, the handwriting on it was too familiar to her, Buddhism embodies sincerity, and she usually copies the scriptures by herself, but she didn't expect that Song Qingran was so busy that she even found time to copy the scriptures by hand.

She probably unconsciously asked the doubts in her heart, Song Qingran lowered her eyes and said, "Well, there is time." "

Nanbei smiled: "This was not the case with Mr. Song in the past. When she said this, she regretted it a little, and she was sour by the sourness that she had mixed in her words.

Song Qingran glanced at her sideways, there was a little smile in his dark eyes, the smile on his face was not a smile, nor was it a ruffian, his eyes seemed to be bright and dyed with deep light, he sighed, and his tone was helpless: "Well, I was wrong, I'm sorry." "

Nanbei was sullen, pursed his lips, and stopped talking.

*

Out of the Buddhist temple, the assistant had already parked the car aside, just waiting for Song Qingran to get in the car, Song Qingran didn't expect to meet Nanbei here today, he looked around, didn't see Nanbei driving, he asked the assistant to get out of the car, and then he drove the car slowly and followed behind Nanbei.

Nanbei noticed the movement behind him, and wrinkled his brows, a little irritable.

At this time, Song Qingran drove the car to her side, lowered the window, and said, "Let's have a lunch together, is it okay?" "

The north and the south ignored him. Song Qingran didn't say anything more, just followed slowly, Nanbei was going to take the subway, Song Qingran quickly parked the car on the side of the road and followed into the subway.

The subway line in central London at this point is still relatively congested, and the north-south speed is accelerating, wanting to get rid of Song Qingran, and although Song Qingran is from a wealthy background, he is not without common sense. He quickly squeezed into the subway as well, and the subway doors slowly closed behind him.

At this time, the carriage was even more congested, crowded with people, and the figure swayed slightly.

A smile appeared in Song Qingran's eyes, he dragged the handle in his hand, lowered his head, and Nanbei was in front of him, as if he was surrounded by him.

Nanbei felt very uncomfortable, Song Qingran deliberately changed her position, she was squeezed by the person behind her, almost the whole person leaned into his arms, the familiar and unfamiliar breath on his body jumped into her breathing, making her feel that it was a little difficult to even breathe, and the soft fabric of the neckline of his suit rubbed the tip of her nose from time to time.

She could feel his burning gaze, but she didn't even have the courage to lift her head, she was afraid to see his affectionate and persistent eyes.

Song Qingran's low and hoarse voice came from above her head: "Beibei, I miss you very much." "

North and South ears are a little hot, scalp slightly numb, he approached her, the people around him are buzzing, their bodies are crowded, obviously not so intimate that it is difficult to see people, obviously they have had more intimate behavior between them, obviously they are not the first time to hug.

But this time, Nanbei couldn't control the faint trembling, she pushed Song Qingran suddenly, Song Qingran didn't stand firm for a while, and accidentally bumped into the person behind him.

The foreigner had a bad temper, frowned, and when he saw Asian faces like Song Qingran and Nanbei, he pulled the corners of his lower lip, his voice became louder, and he directly attacked the nationality: "Don't push on the subway!"

Song Qingran twisted her eyebrows, her thin lips pursed, Nanbei felt embarrassed, and apologized in a low voice, it was because she pushed Song Qingran that it caused the dispute.

After the foreigner finished scolding, he put on his headphones again, the subway people were still so crowded, and the two were still so close, Song Qingran protected the north and south in the corner, and used his generous back to open up a world for her.

Nanbei lowered his eyelids and didn't look at him, but he didn't push him away anymore.

Song Qingran's Adam's apple moved slightly, lowered his eyes to see her slightly trembling eyelashes and faintly reddened earlobes, silently hooked the corners of his lower lip, he narrowed his eyes, and restrained himself with all his strength to hug her.

He told himself that he was going to take it step by step and that he was going to give her a safe enough distance.

Of course, if he could, he hoped that the brother in the back could squeeze him hard, well, he didn't mean to hug him, and he blamed too many people on the subway.

*

After getting off the subway, Nanbei didn't take the initiative to talk to Song Qingran, she almost ignored him, but she couldn't stop Song Qingran from following her cheekily and casually.

The two of them are handsome men and beautiful women, and they are both conspicuous Asian faces, and when they walk one after the other, they will naturally be recognized as a couple who are having a temper.