011 Suffering from love
Hamand paused for a moment and accentuated his tone a little, "And if I hadn't waited here, you'd probably never remember who I am." I have the impression that you've always been just a nasty man who harasses ladies. ”
Caiyue didn't plan to be more polite to this man just because she recognized him as Hamander.
"Do you think that if you are waiting here now, you are not a person who harasses ladies?"
Caiyue's coldness did not affect Hamander's calm and confident face at all.
"If you were willing to give each other a little time to get to know each other, you wouldn't think so. Trust me, I didn't mean to harass you. And, having a friend like me, you'll find it interesting. At the very least, you can take a moment of relief from your present worries. ”
"Why do you think I'm in trouble right now?" said Caiyue, looking suspiciously at Hamand.
"With your skills, you shouldn't hit a punching bag like a raw hand, so you must be in a bad mood to do this, am I right?"
It turned out that she was in a bad mood just because of this.
"I'm a stubborn person, and if you don't promise me back today, you'll find that the rest of your time will be wasted because of me, and it's not good for either of us, right?" Harmand continued.
Cai Yue thought about it for a moment and nodded.
Rumor has it that this Hamander has had an eccentric personality since he was a child, and either likes to spend all day in his castle or to travel the world. It is said that once he was chatting with a friend on the street, and he talked about an interesting anecdote about a certain country, and he did not return home immediately, but went directly to the airport. On the way, he asked the butler to drive his car, delivered his luggage and passport to the airport, and then went straight to a certain country in the anecdote.
Such an eccentric person, Cai Yue really became interested in getting to know him.
The two went directly to the second floor of the hall. There is a quiet relaxation area where you can relax quietly and chat over a drink.
"Do you like white chocolate Martini?" Hamand asked as soon as he sat down.
When Caiyue sat here last time, he asked for Bai Qiaoli Martini, and he still remembered that Caiyue was quite surprised.
"No, once in a while, I don't like it. Under the influence of Xiao Tian, she doesn't like to expose too much of her preferences in front of people now.
"And now what do you want to drink?"
"Didn't you say you wanted me to have coffee with you? ”
After working with Qiu Yan for a short time, she tasted the real so-called Blue Mountain coffee. It turns out that the authentic Blue Mountains are not so bitter, but a little sour. Influenced by Qiu Yan, she also slowly fell in love with Mocha. While she still prefers the Blue Mountains, she likes a cup of mocha when she wants to relax and rest.
Hamand also asked for Mocha.
"We all have problems, but we shouldn't solve them in a way that hurts us. It's better not to have it anymore like today. ”
This is already Hamand's many references to Caiyue's boxing sandbag behavior today, regardless of protecting himself.
"Actually, I do have to thank you for stopping me in time. I was really in a bad state at the time. At this time, Caiyue is not as emotional as she was just now.
"Well, if you can say that, then I didn't waste those twelve minutes today. Hamand nodded with some relief, "I was also very unhappy when I was a kid, you know how I did it?"
"How did you do that?" was indeed a little curious about this strange man, Caiyue.
"I sank myself into the pool of my own home. Even though I could swim, I suffocated myself until the butler found me and rescued me. ”
Caiyue's eyes widened. A person who can swim can still sink himself to the bottom of the water until he suffocates, is this suicide or anger? Isn't it human instinct to survive? How can he drown himself alive?
Hamander smiled indifferently, "Don't you think I'm weird?"
Cai Yue nodded truthfully.
Hamand's charming blue eyes looked out of focus.
"Miss Caiyue, do you occasionally have the feeling that you are a superfluous person, an outcast from the world?"
Cai Yue smiled and didn't answer. Since her mother passed away and Xiao Tian woke up, she often felt this way. Not being needed, not being cared for, being deceived by the people you love the most, being hurt by the people you love the most.
Hamand didn't seem to be expecting her answer, he was muttering to himself.
"When I was a child, I was always alone, and my parents were busy and playing their own games every day, ignoring me and my brother. My brother is a very noisy kid, and I'm a quiet person. So I'd rather not be with him and prefer me to be alone. I didn't know what love was, and no one had taught me what love was. I also don't know what normal family affection should look like. All I know is that in my home, not interfering with other people's freedom is love, and respecting other people's right to be alone is love. ”
Caiyue couldn't help but sympathize with him when she heard Hamand say this. It's no wonder that people who grow up like this have those strange behaviors.
"But what you just did to me is completely different from what you just said. Not only did you not respect my right to be alone, but you kept on..."Cai Yue paused, she wanted to use the word "harassment", but after hesitating for half a second, she replaced it with "disturb me".
Hamander smiled, "Doesn't you have an idiom in China called 'things must return'?"
Cai Yue nodded, "Then what is it that makes you have to return?"
Hamand fell into the memory again: "Because I met a woman." ”
Cai Yue held her chin with her hand and looked at Hamand with great interest: "So, your first love began, right?"
Hamand nodded: "She is the most beautiful and best woman in the world." As he said this, Hamand's face showed tenderness.
"Well, it is conceivable that the person who can make a character like you must return must be a very beautiful and very good woman. Did she become your wife?"
Hamand shook his head: "She loves me in another world now. ”
Cai Yue's eyes widened: "How come?"
"She has had heart disease since she was a child, and doctors say it will be difficult for her to live past the age of 30 and that she must never get pregnant. But she insisted on carrying a child for me. And then she left me like that. Hamand's hand shook slightly, and he could see that he was still sad and excited about his lover's departure.
"But are your children also..."
Harmand nodded: "Well, her body can't bear the load of pregnancy, and the doctor advised her to remove the baby, but she wants to hold on to it until the end." But the result was that the child was not saved, and she herself..."
Cai Yue felt very apologetic, "I'm sorry! I didn't expect it to be like this." Your lover really loves you, that's why she can change you. ”
Hamander is still stuck in his memories: "When she was with me, she never knew how to care for me, but she didn't know how to care for herself. I was very selfish and cruel to her at first, but she was always tolerant of me and loved me as she always was. So, because of her, I slowly learned to love. I also know that loving someone and being loved by someone is actually a very happy thing. ”
Cai Yue listened a little intrigued, "Your lover is really great!"
Hamander's face became more and more gentle: "When I want to be quiet, she will stay with me in the castle and never go anywhere." When I want to wander around, she will accompany me everywhere, wherever I want to go, whenever I want to go. If I didn't want her to be with me, she would leave me alone, and wouldn't ask me where I was going, how long I was going, and I wouldn't be able to come back. ”
Cai Yue thought, the weirdo who said to Hamand and walked away like this, it is true that only such a woman can stand it.
She remembered that when she and Xiao Tian were still together before, she didn't know how many times she was depressed because of Xiao Tian's so-called "business trip" that never said the specific time and place. Now comparing his lover mentioned by Hamand, Caiyue can't help but sigh that Hamand's lover can do that to Hamander, and that is really possible only if you have complete dedication and trust in him.
"You are really lucky to have such a person who loves you no matter what. Cai Yue said very sincerely, she didn't have such love. She thought she loved Xiao Tian very much, but she couldn't do it to him like the woman in Hamand.
"So, she changed my life. I have also learned to show care and love to others. Hamand put away his look of remembrance, and his face changed back to seriousness.
"But I've heard a lot of weird things about you. Cai Yue hesitated when she said this.
"For example, I'm bisexual, let's say I'm a quirk. Right?" Hamander smiled nonchalantly.
Cai Yue pursed her lips slightly embarrassed, but nodded anyway.
"I didn't value my lover much when she was still with me. I've had many women and she was just one of them, and the least known one, because I kept denying her access to my world. At that time, I refused to love and refused to be loved. So I'd rather be with other women. Later, when she left, I realized that I had lost the most precious thing in the world. So I was very remorseful and refused to be near all women. Because of this, some people suspect that I am tired of playing with women and have switched to playing with men. ”
Caiyue suddenly realized. It is rumored that this rich Hamand eats both men and women, and he does have a face that eats both men and women, which makes this rumor even louder.
So, people with quirks of personality are not without special reasons. It is not surprising that men who have had such emotional experiences have such quirks. Speaking of which, in fact, he is also a person who suffers from love, is trapped by love, and regrets love.
"Do you regret it? regret that you shouldn't have done that to her?"
Hamand nodded lightly, "That's why I sank myself in the pool." ”