"What diploma?"

"College College. ”

"What? With this diploma, you are embarrassed to come to our company for an interview? Young man, I suggest that you donate the corners of your eyes and membranes to those in need. Can't you see our recruitment requirements? Not even an undergraduate, what are you doing here?

-------

"What major?"

"Hands... ”

"What? Walk-behind tractor major? Damn! Is there really a second major to choose this major? Hurry up, we're hiring programmers, not cleaners. Next!"

-------

"Hey, young man, you are quite discerning! You actually chose to come to our company for an interview, you can rest assured, as long as you serve my brother and me well, you can say anything!"

"Wait!"

"What do you have to say?"

"Honestly, I... There's AIDS, the late-stage kind... ”

"Hey, what a coincidence? I have it too! Come on, comrade, let's talk about life!"

"Let go!"

。。。

For a whole morning, Qin Lang interviewed twelve companies, and there was no doubt that none of them took a fancy to him.

Of course, the last one doesn't count.

In order to be a salesman in a sex toy store, he still has to be unspoken by people! If it is a beautiful woman, it is okay to endure it, but the key to him is that the object is still a lewd man with a full beard and a fat pig!

Qin Daguan has always been clean and self-conscious, and even the small movies of the Japanese Kingdom are just hiding in the quilt and peeking at them every once in a while! How could he do such a dirty and shameless deed? If it weren't for the security guards, he would have to vomit on his stinky face... Uh, saliva.

Who is Qin Lang?

The famous prince of fake medicine at the top of Suzaku Street.

The number one target of the urban management brigade.

is 1.75 meters tall, emaciated, as if he has been malnourished for a long time, with a knife-and-axe-like face with a half-rimmed glasses, although his appearance is not as good as those Goryeo sticks with excessive plastic surgery in idol dramas on TV, but he is still handsome.

At least, he thinks it's okay for himself.

After graduating from college at the age of 25 this year, he was framed and imprisoned for two years. After he was released from prison, he has been languishing, and because he has a criminal record, no regular company is willing to accept him, so he has to make a living by selling fake drugs on the ground.

I don't know if the group of grandsons in the urban management brigade have irregular menstruation or indigestion after eating too much stool recently, and they hold Qin Lang every day, which makes Qin Lang stunned for seven days.

M's, isn't it just a little rat to trick them into a big tonic and take it back to stew soup and drink it?

In order to avoid the limelight temporarily, Qin Lang had to choose to be someone else's grandson, of course, this grandson was not yet a grandson.

Finding a job is actually no different from finding a partner, and there is often a phenomenon that the high is not low. Don't want to apply for too high-level positions, and don't want to settle for low-wage jobs that are heavy. One morning passed, and the suit bought from the stall on his upper body had been torn and crumpled by Qin Lang, no different from a rag, and he still hadn't found a suitable job. Distraught, he simply took off the suit that made him very uncomfortable and threw it into the trash.

It was the middle of June, the scorching sun was in the sky, and the heat was unbearable.

Touching his shriveled trouser pocket, as if feeling the reluctant struggle of the last ten yuan, Qin Lang hesitated in his heart, and finally walked towards the newly opened coffee house on the fourth floor of the shopping mall behind him.

Qin Lang is a real dick, and the cash he can take out in his pocket will never exceed three digits when he struggles with food and clothing all year round, and the same is true for WeChat Alipay. Today, of course, is no exception, in normal times, coffee is simply a luxury for him, but now it is different!

Because of his sharp eyes, he found that the newly opened one is not only discounted, but also refilled!

What does it mean to refill?

To put it simply, as long as you are thick-skinned enough, it is completely reasonable to close from other people's businesses.

Obviously, Qin Lang is this kind of person.

Dim candlelight, soft music, and the enticing aroma of coffee mixed with the refreshing scent of flowers wafts in the air. I have to say that the decoration of this house is not luxurious, and even some overly simple coffee houses make people feel good.

Qin Lang sat cross-legged on the chair of the elegant seat very indecently, the beauty magazine in front of him did not arouse his interest at all, he looked out through the window with half-squinted eyes, holding a cup of the cheapest coffee without sugar in his left hand, and holding a spoon in his right hand, I don't know whether it was intentional or unintentional, touching the coffee cup "ding".

With a gloomy face, a stubble on his chin, and a melancholy look, people who don't know will definitely think at first glance that this is a middle-aged and down-and-out uncle in his thirties.

"Waiter, refill the cup! By the way, help me get two more tarts of egg tarts, the free kind!"

Yes.

Qin Lang felt that the owner of this shop was simply too young! The coffee could be refilled and poured even if it was folded, and there were even fragrant egg tarts that could be tasted at will! No, it was made special! In just ten minutes, Qin Lang had refilled the cup for the fifth time, and he had eaten a plate of egg tarts, and he was still unsatisfied.

There is food, drink, air conditioning, and girls! The key is that it is very cheap!

Where do you say to find such a feng shui treasure?

Qin Lang secretly decided: Come back tomorrow!

"That... I'm sorry, this handsome guy, the egg tart is gone, look, do you want to refill the cup?" came the crisp and sweet voice of the handsome service girl in Hanfu in her ears.

This boss is stingy, isn't it?

Qin Lang touched his stomach and said unwillingly: "That's it! ”

The waiter breathed a sigh of relief, and Qin Lang replied coldly: "Give me a bigger cup, the bucket is fine, fill it full! I am a big man, and I am not a sissy, I am impatient to drink the small cup!"

Qin Lang's words were high in decibels, and he instantly offended a few guests, and immediately a guest took the case: "Boy, who is the sissy to scold?"

"Whoever admits it will scold whom!" replied Qin Lang Ah Q without raising his head.

As he spoke, he intentionally or unintentionally rolled up his sleeves, revealing a scar on his arm that was about seven or eight centimeters crooked like a centipede-it was a gift from a cellmate in the number when he entered the prison on his first day, of course, Qin Lang naturally would not give up, although there were many of them, he still desperately bit off a large piece of meat on the shoulder of a certain unlucky ghost! Since then, he has an additional nickname in the number - Desperate Saburo!

"You... Forget it, I'm a cultural person, and I don't have the same knowledge as you!"

People are like this, the fierce are afraid of the horizontal, and the horizontal are afraid of death. The scars on Qin Lang's hands were full of intimidation, and those guests immediately chose to be shrunken turtles.

"Hmph! All of them are dressed like dogs, dressed up in fancy manners. At first glance, you will know that your stomach is bad! The man is a thief, and the woman is a prostitute! Lao Tzu loses his appetite when he looks at it, and he has no education and still learns how to keep a Mediterranean hairstyle? Phew! Don't want Bilian! Knock you Ma De, and you are embarrassed to come out to swagger and deceive, and you are simply ashamed! You just hang yourself naked -- shameless to die!"

"Why are you so unqualified... ”

"Quality? You also deserve to talk about quality with your father?" Qin Lang sneered, slapped the table, stood up and pointed his hand and shouted: "Lao Tzu is frank and open, a representative of the new generation of righteous men and gentlemen, one of the top ten outstanding young candidates in Tianlan City, and the first of the three key protected animals in Huaxia Kingdom, how can you birdmen slander casually? What do you see? Look like a, look at your father's dry hair? Believe it or not, Lao Tzu poked your dog eyes? Look, it's you old turtle calves!" Get out of here and watch your dad and exercise!he-tui!"

"It's a shame to be with people like that!"

Under Qin Lang's artillery attack, the few guests who were already small instantly lost interest and got up and left, where can the waiter's little sister be persuaded to stay?

Suddenly, there was only one guest left in the café of Nuoda, Qin Lang looked at the unfinished egg tarts on the other tables, Qin Lang was in a good mood, and he smiled at the traditional virtue of not wasting food.

"This handsome guy, they... ”

"It's okay, I'm not going to see them like ... Qin Lang smiled, revealing a row of white teeth.

“。。。 ”

The young lady found out for the first time that people can still be so shameless.

It is said that coffee can refresh him, but Qin Lang is getting more and more sleepy, after drinking a large pot of coffee brought by the young lady, Qin Lang's upper and lower eyelids fought, and after a while, he actually fell asleep on the table.

"Click, uh... ”

I don't know how long it took, bursts of piercing screams and palpitating screams pulled Qin Lang back to reality from his dream, rubbing his sleepy eyes, Qin Lang looked up and looked out the window.

I don't know if I don't see it, but I'm shocked when I see it!

It was supposed to be a blue sky, but at this moment, it was a strange blood red.

The scenery downstairs made Qin Lang gasp, only to see that the originally neat and immaculate Global Plaza was full of stumps and broken arms, internal organs, and blood flowed all over the ground, and all around were people with hideous faces and strange looks, wandering aimlessly like puppets, once they found a living person, they would frantically pounce on it to bite and eat, and for a time the whole square was as miserable as a slaughtering scene.

What's going on?

Could it be that the coffee is filled with sweat drugs and stimulants?

Qin Lang rubbed his eyes again, and at this moment, his phone rang suddenly: "I don't answer the phone, because I'm sick, what's wrong with me, I have a neuropathy... ”

Seeing the caller prompt, Qin Lang hurriedly pressed the answer button, and before he could speak, he heard someone's stumbling voice on the other end and said, "Lang... Brother Lang, save... Help me! I'm special.,Surrounded by zombies.,I... I'm stuck! What the hell is going on with this Nima? I don't want to die! Brother Lang, help!

Zombies? Is it that the fat man didn't wake up or that he didn't wake up?

"Bang Bang"

Qin Lang raised his hand and gave himself two big ear scrapers, which hurt very much! It seems that he is not dreaming.

The end times are coming! What is this hell about?

Qin Lang lit a cigarette to calm down his restless mood, took a deep breath, pressed his trembling thigh with his left hand, and pretended to be calm and said into the microphone: "Don't panic, tell me, where are you now?"

"In ... At home. ”

"Hide first! Wait for me. Be sure to hold steady ... ”

Hanging up the phone, Qin Lang calmed down again, and dialed his father's phone, but no one answered, which made Qin Lang's heart sink uncontrollably. I didn't have a mother when I was young, and it was my father who worked hard to pull me up, so what if he had three longs and two shorts? But fortunately, my father had been a soldier for a few years, and his reaction ability and physical fitness were not bad, and he should be able to cope with emergencies.

There is also Yiwen! Her own sister, although she was only picked up by her father, has always been the pearl of her father's palm, and she can't have anything to do with the pistachios in the family. I dialed it, but it was turned off. Fortunately, I happened to pass by the fat man's house when I went to Yiwen's school, and I happened to save the fat man and go to Yiwen's school together. Yiwen has been clever since she was a child, and she should be able to protect herself.

As for the fiancée who had never met or been in touch, there was still no news, Qin Lang couldn't help but shake his head...

"Bang bang!

It was dark in the coffee house where the power had been cut out, Qin Lang accidentally kicked down a trash can, and at this moment, a scream came from the bar, Qin Lang trembled all over, and almost didn't pee on his crotch!

"Who's over there? old ... I can see you! Tell you, Lao Tzu has a knife in his hand! No, a ten-meter-long machete! Are you afraid?" In the dark, Qin Lang said inwardly, but his legs trembled uncontrollably.

What kind of knife is a knife?

A knife for cutting nails (or the blunt kind)!

"Uh... Save... ”

The voice was slightly hoarse but somewhat familiar, Qin Lang had the courage to use his mobile phone to illuminate and walk to the bar, only to find that there was a young lady squatting under the bar wearing Hanfu, holding her head with both hands and motionless, isn't this the waitress of the café before?

"Are you alright?

For this young lady, to be honest, Qin Lang doesn't have a good feeling, but he can't say that he is disgusted. From beginning to end, this young lady smiled strangely at herself, and the blind could see the disdain in her eyes, but after thinking about what she had done, it was reasonable for others to be like this.

"Huh. . . Scold... I should... How... Thank you?" the girl slowly stood up under Qin Lang's support, and the moment she turned around, Rao is Qin Lang had always been bold, but she was also so frightened that she stumbled and almost fell to the ground.

Originally, the little face that could not be said to be alluring but at least barely considered exquisite, at this moment only half of it was left, and the other half seemed to have been gnawed by a wild beast, and the other half was drenched in blood and pitted, the shriveled skin and green tendons burst out one by one, one eye was dripping with blood hanging outside the eye socket, and the other had long since disappeared, holding a piece of flesh in his mouth that he didn't know what part of the human body was, and the blood overflowed along the corners of his mouth, "tick tock", the sound of blood dripping on the floor was particularly clear at this moment.

"Uh... Whew!"

The young lady wore her hair scattered, stretched out her hands and pounced towards Qin Lang as if Sadako was asking for her life.

"Hold the grass! We have no grievances, why don't we drink more coffee, we can't hate me like this, right? Eat your grandfather's kick!"

Qin Lang is also a person who has been in it, what scene has he never seen (this kind of scene has indeed not been seen)?

Lifting a leg is a kick, I never thought that this kick was too strong, the head was low, and the person didn't kick it, but poked it into the wooden cabinet behind it, and couldn't pull it out for a long time.

"Quack!" The young lady did not hesitate, and took a hard bite at the base of Qin Lang's thigh.

it! What about this film?

The title of the film is "My Affair with the Zombie Lady"?

It's exciting, isn't it?

Qin Lang almost didn't surrender directly, but fortunately, he was determined, and when he said it was too late, Qin Lang easily touched a palm-sized calculator at the bar, and at the moment when the young lady opened her mouth, he slammed it into her mouth, grabbed her neck with his right hand, and pushed it back vigorously, while she staggered back, Qin Lang grabbed a screwdriver in the corner of the bar, and after 0.01 seconds of hesitation, he plunged it into the young lady's neck.

"Whew!"

The moment she pulled out the screwdriver, blood splattered from her throat, like a small fountain, sprinkled Qin Lang's head and face. Afraid that she would not die, Qin Lang raised the screwdriver again.

Once, twice... I don't know how many times I stabbed it, until the zombie lady under him didn't react, Qin Lang put down the blood-stained murder weapon in his hand.

"Whew... Damn! Don't blame me for being ruthless! It's your mouth that moves first. ”

With difficulty, he pulled out his uncontested left foot, Qin Lang wiped a handful of blood from his face, and collapsed to the ground panting.