The next day was Sunday. We were having lunch. Someone outside suddenly shouted: "Wang Xile, come out, come out." The voice couldn't wait. The son stood up excitedly and said, "I'm full." I'm going to hang out. ”

"I've only eaten a few bites of rice. Go again after eating. The wife hurriedly said.

"Which line, can't speak doesn't count. The son was afraid that we would say something more, so he made a "shhhhhh As soon as the son left, the table lost its original laughter. The wife stood up, straightened her clothes, gathered her hair, and said:

"As soon as the child ran away, the food was no longer tasteful. ”

My wife's words make me feel that God has given the child the fresh life to everyone's family, and only when the child's spiritual life helps the family can it catalyze the happiness of the family.

"Why, do you feel that the child's activity is the root of the family paradise?" I asked.

"Sort of. ”

"Children are the continuation of a family's life and a source of happiness. Nowadays, many children live like slaves, and it is difficult to see laughter every day except for studying, and we must avoid this happening. Speaking from the heart, there are 10,000 problems in a child's growth, but there is only one essence. ”

"What?"

"Happiness. ”

"What's this problem?"

"This is the hardest and most recent question. ”

"Why?"

"Because many Chinese are talking about happiness, but not many people have broken it down. ”

"Look at what you say. It's like you know!"

"Then what do you mean by happiness?" I asked my wife.

"Happiness is a feeling. The wife said half-jokingly and half-seriously, "Such a simple question, who doesn't know that you still need to ask it." Answering you is just to spoil my IQ and give you face. ”

"So how do you tell me how the feeling of happiness comes about?"

"That's how it came about. Is there such a nonsense thing in the world that you ask questions?"

"That's the problem. There is a particularly bad and extremely powerful power in Chinese culture, which is to put problems under the concept, to feel that there is everything, but there is nothing. I said, "Happiness is a very real thing, it is developed one by one, the happiness of children is the safety of the growth environment, the happiness of youth is the goal achieved, the happiness of middle age is the mentality of not being confused, and the happiness of old age is to be able to enjoy the old age." Today, Wang Xile was called out to play by the children, was this the case before?"

"Nope. ”

"It shows that my son is getting something safe, it could be a reliable playmate, it could be a clever way to play. These are the happiness of children. Don't always think about the happiness of your children, that is, the aspect of parental care, and understand that the happiness generated by parental care will become smaller and smaller as you get older. To tell the truth, happiness in life is omnipresent and omnipotent, and happiness can turn the world upside down and dominate the sun, moon and stars. Happiness walks past everyone at all times, even standing in front of you and waiting for you, but not everyone can find and enjoy happiness. My education is to improve the child's ability to discover happiness and pursue happiness, once the child has his own direction, he will continue to take the initiative to improve himself from things, and get the support of kindness, bravery, friendship, children have these things that belong to their own hearts, and they will have a sense of responsibility to love their parents and family when they grow up. ”

"When you talk about your son's problems, you never talk about how to manage your son's studies well and how to improve his test scores. ”

"Education is a kind of life that renews the human race, and only by experiencing reality can the child drive the inner evil out of the heart, and when he grows up, he can put his heart right, and he can be an upright person. If a child's heart can be shaped into a beautiful seed before the age of twelve or thirteen, then he will have the mental strength to challenge the confusion and failure of adolescence, which is known as self-correction. In this way, the life of the family will be as warm as the midday sun. ”

"But what about the college entrance examination scores, that's the most important thing!"

"The score of the college entrance examination is important, but before the age of twelve or thirteen is a critical period for cultivating a sense of responsibility, and if you miss it, you will have a lot of rebellion for a lifetime. ”

"When you think about high school students these days, this phenomenon is really getting more and more obvious. The wife replied thoughtfully.

"Reeds can't do without water, and when they run out of water, they wither immediately, and trees can be cut down, but when they do, they sprout. Some people can be reborn after repeated failures, while others are in the world, and their hearts are like the sea is exhausted and the rivers are dry. I want my son to be a person who can withstand failure and be willing to accept reality. ”

"However, now that my son has improved, there are fewer people who mock you. Yesterday, Mr. Chen asked Wang Xile how many points he scored in the mathematics test in September, and I said 97 points, and he said that he tutored every day and studied Olympiad mathematics, so he scored 95 points. For the first time, I felt a sense of happiness and contentment. ”

In fact, many parents are in order to get this useless satisfaction, unknowingly hurting their children with learning, so that some children lose the ability to achieve happiness, the bigger the worse, and finally nothing can be lifted. ”

"No matter what you say, but a child who gets good grades in exams and surpasses others is real happiness. The wife said, "Oh, it's past two o'clock, I won't talk nonsense with you, I'll go to the beauty salon." ”

The wife is gone. I was at home and fine, and when I went out of the house, I saw my son in the corner of the house playing with five or six children. A child named Menmen said, "Wang Xile, your father is here." ”

"It's fine. The son didn't raise his head and said casually.

"You're not afraid of your dad?!" said another child in exclamation.

"What's there to be afraid of. I play games at home. ”

"You dare to play games at home! Menmen said in surprise.

"My dad still helped me fight!" said the son, smugly.

The son used a braggart tone to ridicule him for his freedom in playing, and the child asked this and that enviously. The rules they play are different from what we used to play when we were kids, but everyone plays very clearly, and when there is an argument, they have to obey the rules. Think of these eight- and nine-year-old children who can resolutely uphold the rules of the game, if education does not produce good people who are good at abiding by the rules, then the government will not have good leadership, and it will not be able to solve problems. If the government itself is the source of the problem, such a government can only create the country into a human desert, thinking of this, he walked over and said:

"Joy, I'll go to my grandmother's house to do some work, and don't forget to lock the door when you go to play far away. ”

At four o'clock, I came back from work at my mother's house, and when I entered the house, I saw my son playing a game with the door. He hurriedly explained: "Dad, Menmen doesn't believe that I dare to play games at home, nor does I believe that I have so many games, saying that I bragged, so I turned on the computer." ”

"Joy, you have the courage to prove that this is a good thing, but what to do when you prove it?"

The son turned off the computer and went out to play with friends with a happy face. I sat in front of the computer and thought about what was the essence of my son's act of proving himself, which was essentially the child creating a new self, an independent self. But this independence needs to be recognized by others in order to grow. This has many similarities with the truth in what adults often say, "to give face".