Time flies, and in a blink of an eye, it is the thirtieth year of the Chinese New Year's Eve. At about 10 o'clock in the morning, I wanted to take my son to the grave of my grandfather, but he had to buy a cannon, so I gave him 100 yuan and said, "Do you remember what happened to buy a cannon last year?"

"Dad, the price of the cannon will be on sale until five o'clock in the afternoon. The son suddenly changed his mind for some reason while speaking, and said, "Let's go to the grave of the grandfather first." ”

Taking the offerings, we rode on our bikes and headed north. On the road, colder than winter are a large number of dead date palm trees on the side of the road. I said ten years ago the roadside was full of trees. The son asked, "Why are all the trees dead?"

"Mainly for the development of the big factories, people are trying to pump groundwater, so that the surface water level drops so much that the roots of the trees can't absorb water. ”

"I see. I understand why I need to save water. It seems that there will not always be water in the pipes. ”

The son quickly had his own associations. I sighed and said, "Joy, you are so wise. ”

After sacrificing to the ancestors. I watched the cold sun shine on the wavy sand dunes all around, and those who love desert scenery could not find anything more unpretentious. Everywhere is bright and bright, and the yellow and clear sand waves are fixed there like a scene of the sea, which makes the monotonous desert more gorgeous. I subconsciously asked, "Joy, why do we go to the grave?"

"In memory of a loved one who has died. ”

"What is the place of the deceased loved one in life?"

"This, this, what place can there be if the person is not there?" the son could not answer.

"Joy, look at the date palm tree in front of you, you imagine the date palm tree as our home, what are you equivalent to on the tree?"

After being inspired by me, the child understood the meaning of my question, and hurriedly said, "I am Shajube." ”

"Yes. You are very smart. ”

"Where's your lord?"

"It's the trunk. ”

"Well done. Joy is getting more and more thoughtful," I said, "what is the equivalent of a dead grandfather?"

My son said this and that, but I didn't say it was right. Truth be told, a child at such a young age can't answer these kinds of questions at all. He hurriedly said, "Dad, what do you say Taiye is equivalent to a tree?"

"Roots. ”

"Roots! Why?"

"For it is from the forerunners that all things that come after them. There is something invisible about the ancestors that will secretly encourage the descendants to meet the challenges of life. ”

"Dad, I don't understand what you're talking about. ”

"Joy, in the big picture, the words you are studying now were not created by dead people?"

"Yes. ”

"Did these words make you knowledgeable?"

"Yes. ”

"Do these words provide nourishment for the living like the roots of a tree?"

"Yes. ”

"Do you say that the dead nourish the living like the roots of a tree?"

"Yes. ”

"Joy, since childhood, does everyone have an old man?"

"Yes. ”

"Would you be happy if I treated your grandfather badly?"

"No, it won't. ”

"This is called 'filial piety', it is the invisible thing left by the predecessors, people only have the strong culture of "filial piety", their own strength will be upgraded to your game, day by day. ”

My son seemed to understand something, he looked away from me, stared at the grave of the grandfather, and said, "Dad, let's kowtow to the grandfather a few more times." ”

When we went back, we saw a lot of people worshipping our ancestors on the side of the road. The son asked puzzledly, "Dad, there is no grave on the side of the road, what are they sacrificing, isn't it a white sacrifice?"

"How can you sacrifice in vain. What are we going on?"

"On the way. ”

"Worshipping their ancestors on the side of the road means that their ancestral graves are not in Gilanta, but their affection for their ancestors will stretch in all directions along the road. ”

"I see. ”

When I returned to my mother's house, "Oh, my good grandson, I have come back from the grave!" said my mother lovingly.

"I'm going to go to the grave every year from now on. The son said.

The grandparents looked at their son's face that was red from the cold. Grandpa asked, "Xixi, did your father teach you this?"

"It's not. That's what I think. ”

"What a great grandma grandchild. Other people's dolls don't follow them to the grave when they give money. Grandma kissed her grandson and said.

My mother's words made me sigh very much. In order to "learn, learn, and learn again, score, score, score, score", local children can even prevaricate such a top priority as ancestor worship, so will this kind of learning be valuable in the future!?

"Dad, I'm going to the cannon market. ”

My son's words interrupted my thoughts. Looking at his bouncing figure, I had a new feeling about him, as if I had been soaked in the aura of my ancestors.

It was almost six o'clock, and my son rushed into the house with a large bag of cannons. He called me over and took out the cannons one by one and laid them on the bed, proudly telling him about the situation before and after the price reduction of each cannon and his bargaining experience. The son knows everything about the cannon market. If this attitude of taking the initiative to care about things becomes his attitude towards life in the future, he can expect lifelong self-improvement in life.

After the son introduced the cannon, he said as if he had done something wrong: "Dad, I also made a mistake today." ”

"What's wrong?"

"I went to the cannon market for a while and saw that other children were firing guns, so I couldn't help but buy the five yuan first, but I bargained. ”

"Joy, if Dad hadn't stopped buying guns last year, you would have spent all the money in one go. Today, if you are alone in the cannon market and can wait for the price of the cannon to be reduced, it means that your self-control has improved a lot, and Dad admires you too much. ”

I kissed him the forehead. I thought to myself, it is really not easy for children to dare to speak out about their mistakes in front of adults.

The pace of reform is too profitable and too fast, making education an issue of great anxiety for all families. But the fact that interests are linked to education means that money will determine the future direction of education, and money is the product of the Jews' "practical needs, selfishness" and "business" of secular idols, but their secular god "money" makes the Jews the only nation to destroy the country. Now in the face of the tide of profit-oriented reform, no one can avoid the confusion in their hearts.

On the first day of the Lunar New Year, the whole family is reunited, and the issue of children's education naturally becomes the most topical topic. When it comes to children, people are accustomed to high scores, and only with high scores can parents feel at ease about their work. I said that from the perspective of the development of European and American society, the kind of score-only learning will not only have nothing to be nostalgic for in the future diversified network society, but will also have an adverse impact on children's future adaptation to the changing life due to the singleness of personality.

"Wang Xile is playing fiercely and can still catch up with the front, I think there must be a reason for it. My sister is only in her second year of junior high school, and she has been studying from morning to night, and she has no free time at all, and I don't think I have much stamina even if she is admitted to university!" said my second father, who is an engineer.

"Now the national exam standards are like this, otherwise, you will definitely not be able to pass the exam, because the exam is dead, and there is no room for choice. As a teacher, my aunt said helplessly.

On the second day of the Lunar New Year, I asked if my son should go to Mr. Liu's house to pay a New Year's greeting, he didn't say a word and picked up a small carton of milk from the ground and went out. Not to mention anything else, he was so scared that he didn't even dare to go to the teacher's house during the Chinese New Year last year.

After my son left, I had a hard time concentrating, and my wife asked me, and I said, "I have an idea, which may not be close to people, but I think it is right." ”

"What's the idea?"

"The day after tomorrow is Wang Xile's birthday, and I don't want to give it to him until I graduate from high school. ”

My wife was shocked by my sudden suggestion, and there was no smile on her fair cheeks. Her face was full of confusion and puzzlement, and she said, "Your Wang family is such a male grandson, Wang Xile's birthday is a matter for the whole family, I don't think it's right not to celebrate the child's birthday." ”

"It's not wrong for a child to celebrate his birthday, but it's wrong that everything in society is dominated by money! If you think about it, how do some students spend their birthdays now? I think it is also a kind of exercise for Wang Xile to give him 50 yuan to live according to his own interests on his birthday. ”

"That is. Now the child's birthday has turned into a drinking party. The wife said, "All right, but you have to do the work of your father and your mother and son." ”

"That's fine," I said happily.

When my son came back, he gestured with his hand to tell me about his visit to Teacher Liu's house, and while he was proud, I said, "Joy, Dad wants to discuss something with you." ”

"What's the matter?"

"The day after tomorrow is your birthday, Dad gives you fifty yuan, you go by yourself, what you want to buy, what you want to play, who you want to play with, where you want to play, it's all up to you, and the family won't give you a birthday. ”

"Dad," the son said in a tone of surprise and uncertainty, "you mean that I will decide how to spend the fifty dollars, and I will decide where to play!?"

"Yes. ”

"Great. I'm celebrating my own birthday!" My son jumped up.

It was so unexpected. Every year on birthdays, adults often do their children's things in the way others do things for the sake of their children, so that they think they are equal and satisfied, but they ignore the more important connotation. In retrospect, adults are often busy with their children's affairs from one thing to another according to their own wishes, and are unwilling to think about what their children need to grow up. Adults often like to stay at home, take others as the standard, are accustomed to satisfying their narrow vision, and always want to do things they don't like for their children according to their own wishes. As a result, the child has experienced too many things that he does not like, and has forgotten the meaning of his life.

"Hee, what if grandparents don't agree?" I said.

"Let's discuss it together, and we will definitely be able to discuss it. Anyway, it's not my birthday, it's too uncomfortable. The son said.

The grandparents were finally explained, and the decisive role was played by the son's grinding kung fu.

The fourth day of the Lunar New Year is my son's birthday. That day, he went out in the morning and played until after 11 o'clock in the evening, and as soon as he entered the door, he said, "It's so happy, it's like I'm celebrating my birthday." ”

My son couldn't wait to tell me how he invited his friends to roller skate, how he bought snacks and had fun in the building community, and that kind of joy that adults can't create no matter how much money they spend.

The emotions of people who are respected will also change quietly with life. On the evening of the eighth day of the Lunar New Year, my son took the initiative to make me a cup of tea for the first time, which made me very happy for a while. I watched him play the game with tea, but I saw the fire of conquest burning in his eyes, to be honest, I have always been very uneasy about the child playing games, and several times I wanted to drive him down was refused, I was unwilling to sit aside and said: "Your skills are too poor" Lin Pair' This level can't be beaten for a week!"

"Dad. You have no idea how hard this level is. ”

"What's so difficult about this, it's still your skills and tactics that can't work. If it were me, I would definitely be able to pass by dividing five by two. ”

"Don't blow it, you don't blow it out, come on, you don't know how powerful your opponent is if you don't fight." The son stood up excitedly, but immediately hesitated, and finally reluctantly said, "Dad." Above. ”

For a moment, "What's the matter, who won?" my son's words floated slowly in the air, and he didn't look down on my skills at all. Unconvinced, I said, "One more time." ”

"Don't say it once, even if you give you ten chances, don't blame me for not letting you play if you can't beat it then. The son said, "You can't." As soon as you look at the trading techniques, you will know the results, and you must not even touch the edges. ”

Every child is born with a super-strong sense of perception. No matter how hard I tried, I failed ten times. This was originally a ploy for me to compete for my children to play games, although I lost, but I felt a special joy in my heart, because this is a sharing, and it will have a second time if it has the first time.

Ousted from the stage by his son, watching him play games has a kind of thinking before doing, witty and changeable style, once he acts, he is very focused, at this time, I think the social significance and educational significance of education contained in the future world games must be very large, but we can't recognize it yet. Then I went to the fire room and added a few pieces of coal to the furnace, and the flames that were running up made me ambitious and hopeful. I came to my son again with joy, and he was still playing the "Lin to Er" level. He suddenly said, "Dad, don't stand, cooperate." ”

"How?"

"My technique is not up to date. You're in charge of these two keys. Just launch. ”

After many rounds of fighting, we finally succeeded, and my son raised his arms and shouted - victory!

Suddenly, I found that the game is a smart tool, which is helpful for the growth of adults and children. I asked, "How did you get through the 'Lin Pair' level today?"

"I fought with my dad. ”

"Dad is a bit dull in playing games, but as a small force, he overcomes the difficulties when added to your business. Joy, in the world, there is nothing more important than learning to cooperate with others. How to work with people, it's not in the book. Dad doesn't want you to play games in front of the computer alone, and hopes that there will be children who can share the experience of playing games with you. ”

"Dad, our classmates don't know how to play. ”

"What about students who are older than you? People should learn to actively ask for advice from those who are better than themselves. ”

"Dad, it's eleven o'clock, I want to play the 'Lin to Er' level again, and today is the first time I have passed this level. ”

"Then I'll be there to cheer you on. ”

Once anything is broken, it is not much difficulty, and the son defeated "Lin Pair" several times in a row and cheered for himself.

The time of the Chinese New Year seems to be shorter than usual, and it has reached the fifteenth day of the year in the blink of an eye. At noon, my wife and I were watching TV at home, and my son rushed in and said, "After a while, my grandmother and I got in my father's car and went to Yinchuan Second Aunt's house to watch the evening social fire." ”

"Is your brother going?" I asked.

"My brother wanted to go, but my aunt wouldn't let me go. ”

"Why?"

"I didn't finish my homework. ”

"Then you're done with your homework?"

The son heard the smell of the words and was silent, as if the breath was going on in his stomach. After a while he whispered, "I wrote as planned." ”

"Is it really going according to plan?"

"Really. The son was visibly uneasy, his face was serious, and his eyes were visibly timid, and he said, "You all saw it when I was doing my homework." ”

"It's good to persevere. I said, "A child with staying power, you can't go there!"

"Dad, you agreed to let me go to Yinchuan. My son immediately took my words. Actually, he didn't understand what I meant.

"Yes. ”

My son threw himself on top of me and hugged me tightly with his hands, as if trying to get something. I touched his head and said, "Okay, get ready to go out." ”

The son let go of his hand, and like a little ghost, he floated from one end of the house to the other and back again, turning three times and five times, and then he sorted out his school bag, towels, toothbrush, etc.

"My son has gone out and become an old fritter," the wife said, "Can you stick to your homework alone at your second aunt's house?"

"Mom, I'm not Wang Xile in the first grade, I'm Wang Xile in the second grade, don't you believe in my ability to write homework!" said the son in a humorous tone.

"Joy, last semester, Teacher Liu said that your holiday homework was made up, and this time Dad didn't want the teacher to criticize him anymore. I said.

"This homework must not be improvised," the son said solemnly.

"When I came back from Yinchuan, school was about to start. You have to finish your homework in Yinchuan. I said.

"Okay. The son replied very simply.

"Have you finished reading The Story of the Cold Star?"

"It's coming. ”

"That's your award-winning book, be sure to read it. I said.

In the next ten days, the weather became more and more ambiguous, and classmates and friends gathered on a large scale, eating, drinking, playing and having fun, and the days were full. But when I go home, I always have nothing else in my heart, because when the child is at home, the house feels full, and when he leaves, everything seems empty!

"What's the matter, do you miss your son?" said the wife.

I smiled astringently and said, "Seems like you don't want to! ”

The next day, at half past five in the afternoon, the shuttle bus from Yinchuan arrived on time. When he saw his son, the whole family laughed, and he seemed to have grown taller again after leaving for more than ten days. During the conversation back at his mother's house, the son was extremely enthusiastic about the fried lamb skewers, and he tasted a little hungry. I said, "Lamb skewers are easy to say." School starts tomorrow, is your homework done?"

"I'm done. ”

My son pulled out his homework from his bag and showed it to me.

"Good quality. ”

"That is, the second aunt tightened it, if it weren't for a day of crazy play, how would I write your homework. Grandma said.

The son's face showed embarrassment and grievance.

"When you finish writing, you make progress, and you manage yourself. I touched his head and said, "Why do you suddenly want to eat oil-pressed lamb skewers?"

The son's face turned back and he said, "Yesterday, my second aunt and I made oil-pressed mutton skewers, which were very delicious." ”

"So that's the case, I'll buy two boxes later, and then go home at night and ask your mother to squeeze it for you. "I paid for it and told my wife what I was saying.

When he came back from his mother, the son shouted that he wanted to squeeze the lamb skewers himself, and said that he had squeezed a lot of skewers by himself at his second aunt's house. I was moved by the "fire" in my son's eyes, and said to my wife: "My son often helps the family, and he believes in himself, so why should we not believe him." ”

My wife, persuaded by me and my children, came to the living room with me. I was watching TV when I heard a special sound coming from the kitchen, and when I looked back, the kitchen was blazing, and my wife and I rushed over but the scene in front of me made my heart freeze instantly. I saw my son holding the handle of the fried scoop tightly with a pair of small hands, and the oil was burning violently inside, but he didn't seem to panic, and he moved out with a confident demeanor. My eyes have forever kept the incredible images in our brains.

I went crazy. The heart is like a volcano being frozen and erupted in an instant by a super cold snap. I couldn't control my frantic heart, the sound of boiling oil burned all over my body, and I prayed to God that you must not let go, son, you are in extreme danger. I whispered, "Joy, don't be afraid, Daddy is here to help you." ”

"Dad, I'm not afraid. ”

I was taken aback. In the face of the burning fried scoop, the son was able to say such a thing. Suddenly, I felt my own presence in my heart, and I hurried over and carefully took the fried scoop from my son's hand.

"Scared me to death, scared me to death!" the wife took a while to come to her senses, holding the child and saying the same thing incessantly. When she sobered up further, she said angrily: "It's all lazy for your dad." Completely half-. It's too irresponsible for children. ”

"Mom, don't talk about my dad, it's okay, I'm not afraid. Yesterday at the second aunt's house, it was squeezed with a gas stove, and the size of the fire was easy to control. The son said.

"Our gas stove is in a small cool room. In winter, the fire of the gas stove is much more powerful than that of the gas stove. Most of the fire lid underneath the fried-up must be sealed. "I showed my son and explained at the same time.

"Now I know. ”

"Joy, mom squeezed it for you. ”

"No, I don't. ”

My son's mouth was so bad that he persuaded my wife and me to go back to the living room.

"Your son is really good," said the wife, who would believe me when she said this, "and I was so frightened that I was cooking and screaming when I got oiled." From the last time I got lost with my son in Dalian, to now my son is walking out by himself with an oil pot, I clearly feel that there is something other than learning growing in my son's body. ”

"It is not surprising that this quality of daring to deal with problems is an inevitable result of play and nature education. Over the years, my son has had many arguments with children while playing and learning to deal with them, but I didn't expect my courage to rise to this level. I said.

My wife and I were talking, but our eyes were glued to the kitchen door, for fear that something would happen again. The sound of shritori kept coming from the kitchen. The son is alone on his way to his recent dream. In fact, when talking is talking, my heart has been flying like a frightened bat, for fear of hearing something other than fried lamb skewers.

"My son is so young, let him do such a dangerous thing alone, if something goes wrong, then don't let others laugh to death. The wife said a little sadly.

"Yes, what does today's child do besides studying, and if the parents don't intend to create opportunities for him to do something, where does his courage come from?"

"You just believe in yourself. If book knowledge doesn't bring bravery, what do students learn every day?" retorted his wife.

"There are so many things that books can't bring. Don't dare to say, it's certain that book knowledge will never bring bravery. Only through practice can people have a stronger courageous ability for self-improvement. ”

"I have no reason not to believe you in the child's progress, but you are also too bold, say you don't care, you talk to the child from time to time about growing up, say you care, the child runs like a madman all day long. Speaking from my heart, my son is really worry-free after the second grade, but I always feel that he is too free, and if this continues, what will the adults do when they grow up in the future?"

"You see you're back to the old problem. If the child has self-control in the future, he will have peace of mind, and he will not care what he will do?

The wife smiled. In a nervous and hesitant mood, when my son learned the tone of the shopkeeper and put a pot of fried mutton skewers in front of us, our hanging hearts landed safely.

My son first gave me and my wife a skewer for each of us, so that we could eat first. We can't praise him enough for his craft. Then he happily picked up the lamb skewers and ate them.

After eating the lamb skewers, the son drove his well-proportioned limbs, walked nimblely, and cleaned up the coffee table back and forth. He said, "Dad, the oil pot is still on the stove, and the oil is still hot, help me put it in the oil bottle later." ”

"Joy, your behavior today is so admirable to my father, and before you realize it, your original dependence and indecisiveness are gone, and you are no longer the original Wang Xile! But while appreciating you, I would like to ask you a question from an intellectual point of view. ”

"What's the problem?"

"What's most important to you right now?"

"Play and learn are the most important things. ”

"Wrong. I said, "The most important thing is to learn to protect your own life." Today you faced a burning oil pan and dealt with it bravely and steadily, but this bravery has nothing to be proud of. ”

The son's face turned pale at once, and his mouth opened and closed in confusion. He looked at me solemnly, and his whole expression was "I don't understand".

"Dad, why is that kind of bravery not worthy of pride?" the son moved his mouth, but his body sat on the sofa like a statue.

"What happens if the pan falls off?"

"I was burned. ”

"Is there anyone in the family who can help you in case of danger?"

"Yes. ”

"When you encounter danger, you should first ask for help when possible, so that the danger will diminish quickly. I said, "If you see a bad guy doing something bad on the road, don't you go up and fight him?"

"Yes. ”

"Wrong. ”

"That's what the books and teachers say. ”

"The book and the teacher are not right. You are too young to have the physical ability to fight with others, and that action is not brave but ignorant, and your best option is to first hide and then quietly call 110 for help. Let me ask you again, if someone is drowning in swimming in the summer, will you save it?"

"Not true. ”

"Why?"

"It's the same as the previous example of fighting the bad guys. I can't swim, so I said I could swim, but my strength was too small to save people, and I was sent to death in vain. ”

"Joy, you are so wise. If you are alone at home today, your actions are right, and you must have the courage to overcome difficulties alone. But we're also at home, so what you're doing today is a mistake. ”

If a person has a correct understanding of bravery, he will constantly change his temperament in solitude, and after a long time, he will develop a sense of truth. "Be a wise person and do things reasonably" is the fundamental aspect that determines the future of life. If Wang Xile had this kind of heart when he was 12 years old, no matter how high or low his studies would be in the future, he would have a permanent basis for life.