Zhang smiled. Mu Chaoyang said very seriously, "Don't tell me because you have no feelings for me, I don't accept this reason." As if to warn him, he said it with great certainty.

Zhang Xiaoxiao's eyes blinked, and he slowly spit out a "good" word, "I'll give you a reason that can't be refuted." ”

So confident? Mu Chaoyang looked at her suspiciously, made a "please" gesture, and asked her to continue.

"I haven't been to the ropeway on Binjiang Road for a long time, and since we've come to N City, let's go and sit once. Xiaoxiao didn't answer him directly, but suddenly moved on to something else.

Mu Chaoyang raised his eyebrows and nodded, "Let's go." ”

"I'm not going to get married, so I don't plan to fall in love anymore. ”

The ropeway on Binjiang Road in N City is a famous tourist attraction in N City, built by the mountains and rivers, not for mountaineering, but more for viewing.

However, it is also quite clean when encountering this non-holiday, and there is no noisy crowd of tourists.

The two of them quickly and skillfully bought the tickets, sat in a separate car, smiled and took a deep breath, as if they had wasted a lot of strength, before slowly speaking.

"Why?" Mu Chaoyang asked her.

"In my country's marriage law, there are several situations that are not suitable for marriage, do you know?" said with a smile, "Guess what?"

What is the situation in the Marriage Law that is not suitable for marriage? Mu Chaoyang's first thought was that he had a genetic disease.

But he didn't want to say anything about it.

"Got the idea?" asked with a smile, "for example...... Psychiatric disorders. ”

"Which one?" Mu Chaoyang vaguely guessed, but he still wanted to hear Xiaoxiao say it himself.

"I have a history of depression. Xiaoxiao didn't shy away from answering him at all, as if saying a daily act like "I wore red clothes today".

Mu Chaoyang was stunned, he didn't know how to answer, whether to ask comfortingly or with concern.

"You're ...... now. I think ...... "He doesn't know much about this disease, only that he will have a misanthropic mood, but looking at Xiaoxiao's current situation, she is not like this."

He opened his mouth to say two words, but felt that it was inappropriate, and swallowed back silently, pretending that nothing had happened.

"What the hell is going on, and what is the situation now?"

After stumbling for a long time, Mu Chaoyang felt that he was still going straight and asked the question he was most concerned about at present.

"Alright. Knowing what he was thinking, Xiaoxiao took the initiative to relieve the siege, "To be precise, he has been cured." ”

"You want to hear it...... About my story?" asked him, even though the answer was obvious.

Mu Chaoyang nodded solemnly, even if he didn't like Zhang Xiaoxiao now, he wanted to know.

At this time, he was not sympathetic, not pity but really cared, he blamed himself a little, Xiaoxiao had such a big thing, and he didn't know it at all.

"It's a child's motherless – that's a long story. "Calling Mu Chaoyang here, Xiaoxiao was ready to tell him, if he rejected him, he would definitely give him a good reason.

But she still didn't know where to start, so she said: "I now have a friend in the unit, and the relationship is very good, named Yu Yan." ”

It sounded irrelevant, but Mu Chaoyang showed full patience and listened quietly.

"It's the girl who introduced Shu Ling's parents to a psychiatrist last time. Thinking of something, he added with a smile, deepening Mu Chaoyang's memory of Yu Yan.

"Well, I remember her. You continue. Mu Chaoyang had a little impression of that girl, as if she was a doctor who managed AIDS patients.

"She was interning in psychology at the time, and it was during my therapy sessions that I met her. Xiaoxiao explained, "Why did I enter the CDC later, she also proposed to take the exam." ”

Yu Yan is Xiaoxiao's assistant psychological counselor, which is equivalent to a volunteer, and needs to follow up on Xiaoxiao's situation.

The two have similar interests and slowly become friends.

Later, Yu Yan also left the clinical position of psychology and was admitted to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention, and Xiaoxiao's recruitment information was what she told Xiaoxiao.

And once Xiaoxiao's mood fluctuates, Yu Yan can always find out in time.

For Xiaoxiao, after her illness recovered, Yu Yan was not an exaggeration for her to be a "life-saving benefactor".

"After Qi Xiaofan's incident, I bumped into the graduation season again. Xiaoxiao continued to talk about her, "You also know the two elders in my family, you have to catch me and go back to Z City." ”

"Of course, there were other reasons at the time. ”

The house leak happened to be rainy, and there was something wrong with Xiaoxiao's relationship and family at that time, and Mu Chaoyang also found a partner at school, and she didn't want to bother.

But at this time, Xiaoxiao and her roommate who lived with her had an inexplicable falling out.

In Nanqi University, during the freshman and sophomore years, Xiaoxiao almost fell on Mu Chaoyang, who had no friends, and finally shared a house with friends in the junior year. At that time, Xiaoxiao's other classmates who had a good relationship were interning in their hometowns.

Xiaoxiao, who is alone in N City, has a bit of an emotional situation.

By the time she realized something was wrong, she had been eating only one bag of sliced bread a week for weeks, and her mind was so busy at night that she couldn't sleep all night.

The most important thing is that at that time, Xiaoxiao's favorite drama suddenly started its second season, and Xiaoxiao found that she didn't even have the desire to open it.

At that time, the most correct decision she made was to go to the school counseling room to ask the teacher for help, Xiaoxiao still remembers that she called at 3:00 in the morning, crying hoarsely alone in the room.

Later, the teacher politely advised her to go to the hospital, and the diagnosis was moderate depression.

"I don't know if depression is a mental illness that is not suitable for marriage. Mu Chaoyang had been listening quietly, and suddenly he interrupted the smile.

"But I know that even if it is a mental illness that is not suitable for marriage and children, it is not recommended to marry only during the onset of the disease. ”

The implication is that now that Xiaoxiao has recovered, he does not accept this reason.

His reaction Zhang Xiaoxiao didn't expect, at least she thought that the name "depression" could scare off many people.

Or, Xiaoxiao later came into contact with similar patients at work, and their families simply didn't understand what the disease was, and only felt that "depression" was caused by the patient, which was just hypocritical.

"Depression relapses are high. Xiaoxiao explained, "It's like, if you look at me well now, you may not see me in a few years." ”

Hearing this, Mu Chaoyang, who had been straining his face, suddenly grinned, and he asked, "Zhang Xiaoxiao, are you rejecting me, or are you holding me firmly?"

"I can't even rest assured that you're fine, and you still tell me about such a situation. His eyes were very sincere, with a burning heat, so that Xiaoxiao couldn't avoid it, "How can I rest assured that I will keep you out of my sight?"

What would he do if he knew about Xiaoxiao's situation in college? Mu Chaoyang didn't like to think about ifs, but when he heard what Xiaoxiao said, he really felt as if his heart was being pinched.

When he was happily falling in love and doing projects, Xiaoxiao was experiencing such pain, and he didn't even know it?

Mu Chaoyang did want to back down, but not because of Xiaoxiao's body, but because he boasted about how to take care of Xiaoxiao, but in the end he didn't help anything.

Then what qualifications does he have to be sure, and Xiaoxiao will agree to his pursuit?

"It's not just that. Xiaoxiao shook her head, "The medication I have taken may have some side effects, and I am worried that starting a family will be a burden on the new family after that." ”

"Family members have to support each other. Mu Chaoyang said, "Instead of you taking it alone, won't it be less stressful to drag one more person into the water?"

As if joking, he continued: "What's more, there is an active receiver in front of you, and you don't strike while the iron is hot." ”

However, there are other things that Xiaoxiao cares about more.

She turned her head sideways and thought about how she wanted to explain to Mu Chaoyang, "For example, normal people have a 1 percent chance of getting depression, but a child born with a history of depression may have a 1 in 30 chance. This is genetically determined, high risk. ”

"This means that your decision could pose a great risk to your future child. Mu Chaoyang's life in Xiaoxiao, she knew that Mu Chaoyang was telling the truth just now, and he probably didn't care about Xiaoxiao's drag.

But what about his children, is this choice fair to future generations?

Sure enough, Mu Chaoyang was silent for a moment, his brows furrowed slightly, it was no longer his business to involve future generations, and he needed to think more.

Of course, this is not without a solution.

She knew that it was only a matter of chance, and that such a negative outcome could be avoided by paying more attention from a young age.

But she couldn't afford to take the risk, and when she gradually learned about her situation, she secretly decided not to have children, and not to get married and drag down another family.

It's just that she doesn't know that Mu Chaoyang doesn't think much differently from her.

Mu Chaoyang didn't know if this could be avoided, but this matter was not unsolvable, such as ...... He can decide and smile and not have children.

The decision to become a Dink family is a bit bold in Mu Chaoyang's eyes, and the principle he pursues is: what cannot be done, he will never make promises.

Even if the balance in his heart has slowly tilted towards this solution at this time, as long as there is still resistance and possible failure, he will not rashly promise Xiaoxiao.

Mu Chaoyang's silence was expected by Xiaoxiao, she didn't know that at this time, he had a thousand thoughts in his mind, and all he thought of was a solution. Thought he had finally backed down.

This is also human nature, although Xiaoxiao has a trace of loss, but he is very satisfied with the result.

"Okay, I've recruited such a private matter, you have to help me keep it secret. ”

Xiaoxiao once got sick, and even her family didn't know about it, so it was all up to Yu Yan to help her back then, and then she carried it alone.

Of course, she trusts Mu Chaoyang and won't shout everywhere, just to ease the solemn atmosphere after the two chat.

"Well, you should have told me a long time ago. Mu Chaoyang complained a little, not only blaming himself for not knowing earlier, but also a little annoyed that he didn't tell him such a big thing.

What can I do, Xiaoxiao smiled bitterly, Xiaoxiao's guilt at the onset of illness was enough to destroy her, and everyone's concern could be the last straw that overwhelmed her.

What's more, it's the person in front of her - she has always felt that she has caused too much trouble to Mu Chaoyang.