Re-registered, found a specialist in this area, looks young, but studied abroad, and has a lot of clinical experience.

I gave him X-rays and a bunch of results reports that I couldn't understand at all, and he looked at them very carefully.

I cautiously asked, "How long will I live?"

The doctor who was drinking almost squirted the water out, "Are you a patient?"

I immediately nodded, and he asked me, "What about your own family?"

"I don't have any family, just tell me, I can take it!" Maybe he has never seen such a direct patient as me, close to death, but he has to face death alone.

This made him pay more attention to me, "I tell you, you are in a very poor physical condition now, and the deterioration will be accelerated, you should eat reasonably, don't smoke, drink, and do those things that are harmful to your body." ”

He tried his best to avoid the question of how long he could live, and I was also in pain, my hands dragged my forehead and fell into thought, I had been living a very messy habit, and I felt stomach pain many times, and I didn't pay attention to it, until it became more and more painful, and these signs became more and more obvious.

Vomiting, not being able to eat, and fatigue ate my life little by little, and I thought I was pregnant, really......

The young doctor could no longer avoid my question, "If chemotherapy is used, the survival may be prolonged, and if you choose conservative treatment, it may not be so painful, but correspondingly, the survival may be shortened, which also varies from person to person, you ......"

I stretched out my hand to interrupt him, I was very calm just now, but this doesn't mean that I can really accept this calmly, in fact, I am very scared, and it is so painful, while listening to the cruel reality, I can no longer control it, with a crying voice, "But I am so young, how can I be like this, you tell me, this is fake." ”

It was so sudden that I couldn't believe it.

Doctors are accustomed to these misfortunes, "There are many triggers, and your condition, if not other factors, is most likely to run in families." ”

I don't know what to say, I never knew who my father was, he only cared about his own momentary happiness, but he never took responsibility for me, he was careless and let me fall into darkness, and now he gave me a sudden end, I wanted to hate him, but I thought that he might not still be alive in this world.

I eased my mood, and I still didn't know what attitude to use to face it!

There's still a long time to live, right? Or a little more than I thought.

What the hell is going to be, I said I'll think about it, and the doctor agreed, "It's okay to go to a better place, and it's okay to be here, but it's okay to treat it as soon as possible?"

He also told me not to skip meals all the time, to rest and not to be too tired.

I listened, I should listen, there was nothing to say, I turned away, the sadness continued, in fact, I kept telling myself, this is nothing, don't be afraid, adjust your mentality.

But when I think about it, I know who it happened to and who would be desperate, and it wasn't like I could get rid of it in a few words.

There was a huge haze that made me, who had lost all hope, and then completely lost hope.

I even thought that I shouldn't have been born in the first place, that I hated to be alive, and that being alive was an ordeal for me.

Very irritable, I got into the car, habitually touched in the car, touched a box of cigarettes, smoked one and lit it, temporarily let me relax my mind, shed tears in the car for a while, let's leave it at that.

I went to another hospital and looked at Fan Da, and I saw that he was already conscious, with bandages all over his body, and even two of his arms were wrapped up.

He was sitting on the bed while I was standing outside the door and saw him turn his head to look out the window at the sky, the sun was surprisingly bright today.

It's just that his face is very dark, and I don't know what he's thinking.

I just took a look, my hand was on the glass, I touched the cold, and immediately retracted, I don't know what the point of my coming is, I just feel that as an old friend, I don't know when I will probably not see him again.

After reading it, I left, and I was in a hurry, and some people who saw me didn't understand, but they didn't dare to stop it.

Ah Leopard is finished, there was a short silence around him, and after he went back, he gradually felt a little pain in his stomach, which may be psychological, or maybe he was really hungry.

I made a little food for myself, ate it alone, seemed to be a little better, found a bottle of wine and poured a glass for myself, drank it and rested for a while, I was really tired.

In my sleep, I heard the phone ringing, which woke me up suddenly and found that it was Li Tingting calling me.

A good sister, she still refuses to forgive me.

What happened between us, suddenly I didn't know very well, I picked it up, she told me that the matter last time was not dealt with, those people were still looking for her, those people were originally bloodsuckers and social dregs, they didn't understand what Xiaowei was doing, they wouldn't stop if they didn't squeeze Li Tingting dry.

Li Tingting asked me, "Can you help me again?"

"Okay!" I said yes, and she said thank you, and then she was silent for a moment, maybe she wanted to say something, but now she had nothing more to say to me.

Before she hung up, I said to her, "You come to me now, I'm going to talk to you!"

My tone was a bit stiff, which caused her disgust, I can't tell why, in fact, I think her biggest misunderstanding of me is not a misunderstanding, but rebellion, and the more I desperately try to explain, the more rebellious she becomes.

Just like if I am good to her, she will think that I can't stand her.

Li Tingting was really unhappy, "What, are you going to preach to me?"

"Ha, it's funny, Li Tingting, you have to understand, now I'm helping you, you're begging me, I want you to come and see me, is it too much?"

My words made her pause on the other side of the phone for a moment, and then replied hatefully, "Okay, I'll come now, where?"

"Come where I'm staying!" I told her the address.

She came, she pushed the door and came in, I specially left the door for her, I suddenly felt that I understood Hu Mei a little, in fact, not locking the door during the day is not careless, no sense of security, after all, people like us, what will really happen, a door is unstoppable, just lonely, I want to hear someone come to see my voice.

The injury on Li Tingting's face was much better, and after she came in, she glanced at me who was lying on the sofa, resting and waiting for her to come, I asked her to sit, and she sat there.

I got up, saw that it was already dark outside, and I had made up for some sleep, but my head hurt a little, and I pointed to the cigarette on the coffee table, "Help me get it!"

"Aren't you pregnant?" Li Tingting took the cigarette, I laughed, clicked softly, and spit out a faint smoke in my mouth, "You tell me the other party's origin, and I'll find someone to help you settle it!"

Li Tingting told me the other party's name, and I nodded, "I know, it's not a big deal." ”

After speaking, I looked back at Li Tingting, Li Tingting felt that I seemed to have changed a little, so that she didn't know how to deal with it, she was like a dumb person.

I asked Li Tingting a question, "Li Tingting, tell me honestly, do you really hate me so much, or do you treat me as a friend and then can't get down the steps?"

I looked at Li Tingting and twitched the corners of her mouth, "Actually, I couldn't think about it at the time, I told you clearly, don't do this, don't do that, but you just don't listen, I hate you, you're too selfish, I treat you as a sister, but you don't think about me, I've been rectified once, and because you have been rectified again!"

"I hate that you're too self-righteous. ”

I understood, she had her own reasons, like a child making trouble, "There's no need for you to ignore me forever, I also have my own difficulties, I'm sorry, can't you stop blaming me?"

Li Tingting's willow eyebrows raised, "Don't blame you for the reason is so simple? I can't do it, I think I'm with you, I'm good to you, but you're like this, it's not fair!"

"Then I'll go first!" Li Tingting stood up and was about to leave, I stopped her with one hand and told her to sit back, because she had something to ask for, and she didn't dare to say that she would leave, endured her unhappiness, and looked at my hand on her face, I wanted her to look at me.

"I'm not begging you to forgive me, I'm just trying to tell you that I don't want to be further and further away from you. I watched her blink and put my forehead against the tip of her snow-white nose, in pain, "I have to tell you, if I don't tell you, I'm afraid I won't have a chance to tell you again, because I have a terminal illness." ”