I closed Tang Xi's notebook.I couldn't bear to continue reading.I'm afraid I'll be as uncontrollable as I suddenly cry and wake up Tang Xi.I'm afraid I'll be uncontrollable to call to say hello.I'm afraid I can't control the panic in my heart.I'm afraid I can't help but care about him as before.

I'm afraid, I'm afraid of a lot of things, there are too many people or things that make me afraid, a person's heart is so big, and I can't hold it anymore when it's full.

I finally endured the pain of half death with all the strength of my body.Dig him out of my heart.Tang Xi carefully entered.Until I filled all my holes.I can't and won't.I want to use all my strength to protect this little happiness.

Song Cheng doesn't know.One of my favorite songs over the years is actually Faye Wong's "Forgiveness".I love the lyrics in it.I love this paragraph the most:You are a hero.You need ambition.But you owe me happiness.What to make up for?Is love more difficult to forgive than hate??

That's right, Song Cheng, you owe me happiness, what do you make up for, how can you make up for it, can you make up for it with your life?

Alas, I can't think about it, I can't hold back my tears, my heart hurts like a pinprick.

The best painkiller is not to want to, not to see, not to smell, not to ask, to be a fool, blind, deaf, dumb.

Looking at the world map hanging on the wall in a daze.I don't know when Tang Xi woke up.Walked behind me with a blanket and wrapped me in a blanket.

His chin rested on top of my head, and his voice was soft and gentle." What's the matter, they're all crying."

I was stunned and reached out and touched my face, and sure enough, I touched tears.

"Did you read the book, Jia Baoyu said that you women are made of water, and you really didn't talk nonsense, whether you are hungry or not, let's go eat?"

I nodded, took his arm and stood up, leaned into his arms and walked to the living room. Sister-in-law Lin had already gotten up, and was busy in the kitchen in an apron at the moment.

My mother glanced at me curiously and asked me, "Why do you get up so early?"

I shook my head and smiled, "I can't sleep, I just wake up and feel refreshed."

My mother put down her hand suspiciously, walked over and reached out and touched my forehead, and said, "You're all right, are you okay?

"I'm fine, it's really fine, besides, with Tang Xi here, there's something that can't be solved."

"That's right, then you guys are going to eat, your dad and I are going to bring food to Gu Yan and them." Since Gu Yan and my eldest brother reconciled, my mother usually mentioned Gu Yan, not my eldest brother, who had fallen out of favor for more than 30 years.

Tang Xi took my hand and sat down next to the table, and after a while, Sister-in-law Lin brought breakfast up, holding a spoon, and I didn't have any appetite at all.

Tang Xi took my hand and squeezed it vigorously, and when I looked at him, he asked me, "What's wrong, what's going on, I'm always so upset."

"It's fine, I just don't want to eat it."

"I don't want to eat, don't I have it?"

I slapped him on the shoulder in amusement, and said speechlessly, "It's just that I don't want to eat much now, and when I'm hungry, I'll want to eat after a while."

Tang Xi nodded knowingly, and said with a smile: "Okay, if you are not hungry now, you will not eat, and you will eat when you are hungry later.

"It's really fine."

"It's okay if you're just trying to fool me, but if you're trying to fool yourself, that's a shame." Tang Xi said to me solemnly, those eyes were full of heaviness.

"Song Chenghe said he wanted to see me one last time, and he said he was dying."

"What are you going to do?

"I don't know, if he really dies, I'm going to see him one last time, but what if he lies to me again, I don't want to be deceived again."

"Usually no one jokes about life and death, you go see him, even if he doesn't die, think it's the last time."

"Aren't you angry.

"Angry, why should I be angry, you can't let go of him in your heart, this shows that you are a loving and righteous person, my wife is a loving and righteous person, why should I be angry." Tang Xi asked me with a smile, and finally sighed and said, "But, I'm going with you."

I was slightly stunned and asked him, "What about the company, come with me, does it matter?"

"It's okay, the company has Tang Jun, it's going to be fine, you go to the UK alone, I'm not at ease."

"How do you know Song Cheng is in England." I asked him strangely, but he just pursed his lips and smiled and didn't answer." How do you know he's in England?"

Tang Xi pushed the salted duck eggs in front of me and said, "Mom said that you like to eat salted duck eggs, come and I'll peel one for you."

"Tang Xi, have you always been in contact with Song Cheng?"

"Yes, I've been in contact with him all along, and he told me before that he wanted to see you one last time, but I think it's better for him to talk to you about this kind of thing, so I didn't promise him to be the microphone."

After receiving Tang Xi's affirmative answer, the spoon in my hand fell into the bowl and jingled with a crisp sound." He's really dying."

"Well, the brain cancer is in an advanced stage, the cancer has spread all over the body, and he went to England to treat the disease."

"That'...... When did he get cancer?"

"Four years ago in the spring, it was found that he had a shadow in his brain, and the final thorough examination was that he had early brain cancer."

"Brain cancer was detected four years ago in the spring." I broke out in a cold sweat, and suddenly I began to wonder if what I had thought was wrong in the first place." Why do you know this?"

Tang Xi also put down the spoon and sighed: "Song Cheng told me, he begged me to take good care of you instead of him, even if he didn't say it, I would take good care of you."

It's a covenant between them, and even if it's all about me, I'm not in a position to say no.

"Then he ran away because he had cancer, and he didn't want to drag me down."

Tang Xi nodded solemnly and said clearly: "Yes."

"What about the junior."

"He deliberately came to lie to you, and that junior really likes him."

"Then why didn't he just tell me."