After my debut, my Weibo was handed over to the company to take care of, and I also accumulated some followers. It's good to be famous, and my work and will can be conveyed to more people. Of course, there is a price, my every move is noticed, and Weibo is not a place to speak freely.

Because I am Zhou Zhenan, there is a company behind my every move, there are fans in front of me, and I am a public figure.

But in a legal sense, I'm just getting out of the category of a minor. I often say that age should not be defined, but that people should give meaning to age. And my fans often praise me for my maturity.

Actually, I don't think so, it's just a little bit of personality made by different experiences, and what they see is just the tip of the iceberg of me, but I don't want them to pay more attention to me as a person than my work.

So I have a trumpet, a Weibo trumpet. The name is the most inconspicuous kind, and the avatar is an anime character with a very different style from mine. I use this trumpet to watch the news, like the funny clips of myself and my friends being put together by fans, discuss the NBA playoffs with ordinary fans, occasionally post some cats and dogs, favorite songs and movies, and occasionally shout like an ordinary teenager.

Hidden in the city, once in a while, I can be an ordinary person, which sounds good.

Then I met Liuliu.

To be precise, she found me. I don't know where she saw my comment, and I don't know why she sent me to my homepage, but she somehow came to talk to me when she came to the illusion that I was like-minded with her.

I started to think that she was a discerning fan, but later I found out that she was just a passerby in the entertainment industry who didn't even know who Zhou Zhenan was, and I actually gave birth to some frustrations that I was not popular enough.

She and I were fighting pictures, chatting about cats and dogs, and even discussing the news, and we were surprisingly compatible. The only drawback is probably that she shared the songs of her favorite band with me, and when I rarely dismantled and analyzed the melody, lyrics, arrangement, and harmony one by one, she would just say blankly: Ah, I just think it's good, Anan, you know a lot.

I only told her that my name was Zhou Nan, and she only told me that her name was Jiang Liu, and it was rare to get along with each other so isolated in the Internet era.

Most of the time I was very busy, and she was not always stationed on Weibo, so the two of us chatted for a year. But unconsciously, if I have the inspiration to send her a demo and she can praise it, or go online and see her "Anan Anan, you look at this is so funny hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha I'll feel happy.

She's a very good girl, usually she's so happy that she looks silly, and she's usually clever and cunning like a little fox when she fights with me, but she's essentially well-behaved and docile, and she doesn't mind even if I talk back once a month.

The first thing to mind was me, when I frowned for a long time and wondered why I had only been replying to the message once for so long and she wasn't angry. I suddenly remembered a meme made for me by a fan: no, this is the feeling of heartbeat. Then, my ears were red.

I couldn't believe I was so excited when I found out that her city was in my tour plans. The last time I did this was when I was participating in the draft, I received a phone call from a senior who I admired to encourage me.

At the end of the performance, I was lying in a hotel in the same city as her, still hesitating how to disclose my identity, but she boldly confessed to me, what a warm girl. My ears were red and red, and my agent Sister Li Mo saw the clues, I excused myself and said that it was too hot in the middle of summer, Sister Li Mo just smiled meaninglessly, and then my first love began.

When we met, I was so shy, I usually wore see-through clothes on stage and I could unreservedly release my charm, but now I felt helpless when she looked at me with her smiling eyes.

She's not good-looking, but she has a temperament that I like, and her eyebrows are very good, adding a three-point bookish atmosphere. Baby fat without powder and shoulder-length hair without grooming look well-behaved. Those eyes were also very smart, and they looked at me like a little fox and asked me to call her sister, and then they giggled and laughed.

I'm half a year younger than her, which makes me a little unwilling. In addition, the first meeting with my first girlfriend was shy in addition to heartbeat, and the first time I thanked my single eyelid that didn't look very friendly, hoping that it would help me save some face. I hope she doesn't notice my reddening cheeks and twinkle eyes.

She didn't seem to care about my appearance or profession at all, but she surprised me when we met me, and I was a little happy.

As for me, I turned out to be a somewhat famous singer, and she only found out about it after she went home, which scared her. Ignoring me for a long time, I could feel that my profession had caused her some distress and tension. But I believe I can do a good job and make her happy to be my girlfriend.

Except that I'm busy and she has to keep things secret from us, we're a cheesy and loving couple. She enrolled in the university in City B for me, and I was overjoyed. I try my best to spend time with her, although the time is still too little, she is alone most of the time, and all I can do is be as considerate as possible when we are together. I am also grateful to her for her unconditional support for my love of music.

We've been good, at least how I think, at least until I was nineteen that year.

The day before my nineteenth birthday, she visited my home like a happy bird with cake and beer. The sound of joy made my heart soften and collapse.

She poured me wine with her rhetoric, but I couldn't refuse her naughty look, and she was always too well-behaved and preoccupied during that time. Anyway, I didn't have a job the next day, so I just had to talk to my parents on the phone. He laughed even more indulgently.

She did a lot of daring things with the strength of the wine, pinched my nose and forced me to call her sister, angrily saying that I was almost lighter than her, and chased me and tickled until the two of them lay on the bed together and laughed. We scolded each other, exposed each other's bad things and had fun. I really feel that in this circle, only she can cancel out all my negative energy, even if she is just smiling in front of me, I have strength pouring out from within.

Most daringly, she said she was going to give herself to me as my birthday present.

I never thought that this day was so early, so early that I didn't dare to say responsibility, I didn't dare, I was afraid of hurting her. But she was coquettish at me, and smiled at me silly.

For the next six years, I often wondered if the story would have taken a new direction if I hadn't accepted the gift at the time. Will she stay, or will I be able to forget about her. It's a pity that there are no ifs.

In fact, I don't remember the process very much, it seems that she is in pain, because she cried, very aggrieved, I hurriedly coaxed her, but she just hugged me tighter. At that moment, I thought I must treat her better in the future.

Afterwards, she obediently leaned on my arms, played with my hands, lovingly brushed the cocoons from the piano, and then sighed: "Your hands are so beautiful." "I didn't think so, my hands are short and thick, but I feel lucky to be kissed softly by her.

"My Anan looks good everywhere. She looked at me with a smile.

"What color will you decorate your home in the future?" she asked me.

"Blue, I replied casually. ”

"I think the blue and gray are quite compatible, the sofa should be fabric, put a few pillows, the bed should be big and soft, there must be a piano, I like you to play the piano......" she said and lowered her voice, tired and fell asleep, I couldn't help pinching her cheeks, my heart was satisfied.

Later, before I could set up a house like that for her, she disappeared, for no reason, without leaving a word, so suddenly, she disappeared. I missed her so much, only to suddenly realize that she had always come to me, I didn't even know what her name was, and I realized that I had always been too confident, and I let go of her at every intersection and strode forward, without looking back. I always thought she would always be there, but this little fox didn't behave once after all. I turned to my agent and she didn't seem to be able to do anything about it. We didn't have any friends in common, and she protected me and stayed in a quiet corner.

I had no choice but to leave her a message in despair. She never replied. My messages were brief, but they spanned several arcs of anxiety, anger, panic, and despair, and finally played into a desolate chord.

In the end, I almost gave up, and I just hoped that she hadn't had an accident and that her fox-like eyes were still bright. "I forgive you," I sent the long-silent dialog.

Since then, I have never posted on Moments, and I have also sealed my account, and I don't want to read Weibo private messages anymore. For the first time, a phrase came to my mind: loneliness is the norm of life. I don't know where I heard this sentence, but at this moment it is so profound.

I chose to go to the United States, the university I have always wanted to study. If I can exchange waiting for the chance to meet again, I hope to make the wait less long with my work, and I also hope that one day she will be able to see me. In a better posture, on a bigger stage. That's when I can tell everybody that this is the girl I like.