Recently, a "child labor" has become popular.

A six-year-old boy went to the factory with his mother during the summer vacation to experience life.

The children did it well, and their movements were very serious.

It's just that after working for a while, the boy sweated profusely and said: It's really hard to earn money.

This mother's special education method has caused heated discussions on the Internet.

Some people say that using personal experience to let children know that life is not easy and making money is not easy, which is more empathetic to children than how many times they have preached "every grain is hard".

Whether it is necessary to carry out hardship education is a puzzle for countless parents.

In fact, the so-called hardship education is not eating bran in the traditional sense, starving and cold, and destroying physical strength.

Its focus is on education, so that children can understand profound life philosophies in different life problems.

During the revolutionary period, there was an old saying in China: If there are difficulties, you must go up, and if there are no difficulties, you must also go up to create difficulties.

Many parents in life will also deliberately create problems and let their children experience the hardships of life in advance.

But when the child really encounters a problem, he is afraid that the child will be harmed.

The so-called hardship education does not need to be too deliberate.

On the contrary, we should naturally face the various troubles that children will encounter in the process of growing up.

There is no need to deliberately beat and shake these "little saplings", but let the natural wind and rain give them natural tempering, so that they can learn to face the wind and rain and take deep roots in the ground.

We adults often lament that "life is really hard", and it is not easy to be born as a human being, and the same is true for children.

These kinds of hardships encountered in the process of growing up, no matter how distressed they are, let the children taste them for themselves.

Persistence of bitterness

From childhood to adulthood, no matter what we do, we will go through a stage from full of passion to fading enthusiasm.

When the enthusiasm is gone, and you persevere with perseverance, it is really painful.

But after going through the pain, you can reap the benefits of sudden enlightenment.

The "bitterness" of persistence must be eaten by children.

Persist in the rain to better appreciate the dazzling rainbow.

Last year, Liu Huan talked about his daughter's education in an interview in "Singer", and he regretted it very much.

He said, "My wife and I both pursue a happy education and do not force our children to do things they don't like.

She has a good ability to perceive music since she was a child, and her memory is also very good, and she can basically sing many complex intervals after listening to them twice.

However, she was often too lazy to practice, and we never deliberately forced her.

We adults still can't do self-discipline, and children who can rely on consciously insisting on practicing are even rarer.

Children's judgment and ability to control the future are very weak, and we as parents are to guide and help children learn to persevere.

Many parents will be the same as Liu Huan, they feel that they should respect their children and educate happily, so when their children shout bitterness and say that they are not interested, they all retreat.

There is no contradiction between respecting children and forcing them, we can not force them to take the exam, not force them to achieve any results, but ask them to do their best and persevere.

Jay Chou once showed off his piano skills in Nicholas Tse's show, and he could play beautiful music with all kinds of fruits.

The piano is with him, like a part of him, flowing smoothly and freely.

Nicholas Tse couldn't help but sigh: I regret not "listening to my mother" like you.

Jay Chou practiced the piano when he was a child, and he relied on his mother to force him with a rattan in the back.

He also wondered why I had to practice every day when others could play outside.

Now, he is grateful to his mother for her persistence, and he is also grateful for his persistence.

"You Bao Zen Mountain" said that the world's wonders, wonders, and extraordinary views often lie in the danger and distance, and people are rare, so those who are not aspiring can not reach it.

We let our children persevere, not so that they can suffer from flesh and skin, but let them experience the process of racing against themselves;

It's not about making them a success, it's about learning that everything will be rewarded.

Taste the bitterness of perseverance, let children be resolute and meet a better self.

The bitterness of frustration

Life is unsatisfactory, nine times out of ten. We need to teach our children to succeed, but also how to deal with setbacks.

In the 2010 college entrance season, there was such a sad news.

A top student from the No. 2 High School Affiliated to Shanghai China Normal University, with excellent grades, often participates in various competitions on behalf of the school. Before the college entrance examination, because he was not admitted to Tsinghua University in advance, he chose to commit suicide.

He was not admitted to Tsinghua University, but he was admitted to the Department of Psychology of Peking University.

This is also a height that countless people can't look up to, but he still chose to jump from a tall building.

Every child has a process of giving it their all, and if they fail, how do they face it?

What we need to teach our children is how to deal with frustration when things don't turn their way.

Maybe our children will not be saddened by something like Tsinghua University and Peking University, but the frustration of a child's growth often appears:

"Mom, kids don't like to play with me"

"Mom, the building blocks I built with great difficulty suddenly collapsed"

"Mom, I lost this game"

"Mom, I regressed more than ten times in this exam"

These small things are all times when the child is very lost in his heart.

Let children calmly face unsatisfactory and find new outlets for themselves is the wealth of children's lives.

Adler gave three small suggestions in "Insight into Human Nature".

First of all, be empathetic and understanding with the child.

Didn't tell him that it didn't matter if he failed, how could it be okay if he failed?

Instead, tell him that I understand you, I know you're sad, and if I were you, I'd be very sad, after all, you've put a lot of effort into it.

Secondly, after the child is emotionally stable, analyze the reasons together.

It doesn't matter if something fails, we have to learn from the failure.

It's not terrible to fail, it's terrible to not know why you failed.

Finally, take the kids to relax and unwind.

The emotion of failure may not be helpful for others to say more, so let them come out on their own, accept their frustrations, and realize that there are many interesting things in life, and many people who love him.

Joy, anger and sorrow are a complete life, missing and frustration is the normal state of life, learn to face frustration, face your own heart, in order to better understand yourself, know the true face of life.

The bitterness of "lack of money".

Not long ago, there was such a news.

A son who has returned from studying abroad has been gnawing at home for ten years, and the father and son often quarrel over this matter.

In a fit of rage, the father smashed the car and house he bought for his son.

The son also wanted to "retaliate with a tooth for a tooth", smashed his father's home, and wanted to hack his father to death.

In this news, we found a very interesting thing.

The "child" has been gnawing at home for ten years, but his father has bought him a house and a car.

This "child" never knew that he was short of money, and he may have always thought that his parents' wealth was his own.

I always hear the old man say that the living conditions of today's children are too good, so they don't want to make progress.

It is not wrong to say that everyone is beaten to death with a stick, but it is not unreasonable.

For many children, their parents have all the material items in place.

Let them not know what money is, and they don't know how much money can do.

Let children know about money, understand the relationship between money and harvest, know how to get it when they don't have money, and let them experience the excitement of self-reliance.

I have a friend who lives on the 6th floor without an elevator, and it is really a chore to go downstairs every day to throw out the garbage, and she thought of a way to let her son "earn money".

Housework is the obligation of every family member, and children will feel that it is their own credit if they are given money for every housework.

Then she chose two chores that no one was willing to do as the basis for the reward.

She came to an agreement with her son.

1 yuan for throwing garbage once, 1 yuan for washing dishes once, and the money saved can buy things you like.

This money has become his son's "heart", and he often saves 50 yuan and then goes to the mall to buy a favorite toy.

While taking out a piece of money, he sighed that "the money is too hard to earn, and I can't help but spend it."

Don't arrange everything for your child, and then think that when he reaches adulthood, he will naturally make money, spend money, and live.

From an early age, let them know that money is obtained by labor.

You can buy as much as you want, and when you don't have money, you restrain your desires.

Children's education is a systematic process, no child will automatically learn anything, it is all in the growth of continuous exploration, only to have the character of growing up.

Only when you experience bitterness can you know what sweetness is.

What we call hardship education is not to deliberately create frustration and trouble for children, or to make yourself a "trouble" for children.

Parents are always the strongest backing for their children, and when children "endure hardships", we should not stand idly by, but stand with our children, overcome difficulties with them, and find an exit.

There is no need to blindly engage in hardship education, nor can we blindly engage in happiness education, but let children learn to be themselves on their own life routes.

Hope for ourselves, as well as for our children.

can have a firm heart and a resolute character. Know how to build bridges when encountering water and building roads in mountains.

Where we don't have it, we can live our own wonderful lives.