Since the killing, I have been gloomy, depressed, uncomfortable, and angry

With only a few intervals, you can experience incredible ecstasy, such as the urge to dance, or some relaxed and natural fearlessness.

But most of the time, it's the pain of wanting to commit suicide.

Killing is not meant to be happy, but to destroy the unreal, and if you need to be happy, then you must keep the pain.

There are also those weird feelings, such as feeling that someone else is not a real person, such as the loneliness of being alone in the world, such as the feeling of seeing that you are not yourself.

I don't have to grasp these weird feelings, even if I don't feel anything at the moment, it still doesn't affect everything in front of me that is unreal.

What you are aware of doesn't change anything because of something, and it doesn't mean anything because of something.

As much as I'm tempted to say that those weird sensations represent the way forward for my slash, it's just wishful thinking.

The character of Yuan Changwen is not real, so all the relevance is also unreal.

Let's die, let's talk about it after all.

It burns and shatters, and it can't be stopped, even if there is no end.

There is too much excitement, and everyone seems to be different, but it seems unreal.

My concern is getting less and less, especially the so-called shame or embarrassment of the hell, which is getting thinner and thinner.

It was as if I knew that if I did this, others would look at it differently, but it didn't seem to make a difference.

All the things that make up the role of Yuan Changwen are dissipating, and there is no need for me to continue to grasp it.

I don't have any interest in how anyone can do this, the world is not real, what else is there to say.

Let me die, the feeling is pervasive, repeated, words that have been said countless times.

I don't know if this repetition is going in circles, or spiraling, I don't know anything.

The role of Yuan Changwen has nothing to do with me, so it's good to die, all kinds of related things are just nonsense.

Even if the character can't be killed, even if the character is just a waste of time, or even if it's just that I'm mentally disturbed and crazy, it's not a big deal.

The character of Yuan Changwen wants to make a profit, wants to stand at the so-called peak of life, and it is my business.

All of them have to die, and it's not a bad thing to die.

The funny thing is that very few people die, and even very few people kill them, so why do you think that killing is a bad thing?

I don't understand the point of creating this atmosphere.

However, that's how the stuff is presented, and for "no characters", the experience is worth it.

Even though I don't have the feeling that "everything is perfect" at the moment, I know that the so-called right and wrong are just distortions in my head, and I don't want to believe them at all.

No matter how obvious the feeling of right and wrong is, it is still only what you are aware of.

What if you can't feel the so-called gratitude and perfection?

Indeed, it is possible to feel that perfection and gratitude all the time, and it does sound very masterful, as if you can feel the kindness of the universe from very small things.

It's a pity that it's still not real, it's still just to flesh out the characters.

Of course, it's not a mistake to stop, and grabbing those feelings can already make the character look attractive and still have no fear to surround it.

However, unreal is unreal.

It seems that I have lost these feelings, as if I can no longer feel that "everything is perfect" or be grateful for everything, that means that I have failed.

These judgments themselves come from a distortion in the mind, and those feelings have been taken as character attributes.

What I'm looking for is not some magical feeling, not something weird about gratitude or loneliness, it's just destroying the unreal.

So after these magical sensory experiences, it's gone, it's gone, and it doesn't matter at all.

The characters don't matter, it's just what they're aware of.

What kind of bullshit magic does the dead talk about, unreal is unreal, even if you can be grateful at any time every day, you can touch "everything is perfect" at any time, it is still not finished.

Perhaps, some people like this, and even, everyone's definition of a master is like this.

It has nothing to do with me, these are still just characters, and the characters in the magical state are still just characters.

Even, the definition of the so-called magical state and normal state still comes from the distortion of the mind, and it is still just a game of numbers.

There is no difference in the state of the character, and it is nonsense to define state A as high-level and state B as low-level.

It's all just what you're aware of, and there's no difference.

Die, nothing can hinder my death, none of it is real.

There are no constraints, and I have to admit that it has nothing to do with me if I don't finish the killing at this moment.

Reality is always there, and whether or not the content of the realization presents the character waking up has nothing to do with the mind.

I've always been awake, or rather, I've never been asleep.

All the interests are just about the characters, nothing can hurt the truth, and nothing can bind the truth.

And the characters are not real, so there is no interest relationship at all, just an emotional product under the whip of fear.

No matter what you want to catch, you can't catch it, it's just in vain.

The worries are only role-related, either for life or for character attributes.

The role of Yuan Changwen is nothing, just die.

If there is nothing, all the character attributes will disappear, and anything that can be proud of will be killed.

Think of the state of being dead, none of me is alive, nothing is left.

Those magical feelings, those words on the way to kill, are just for the sake of killing.

None of this is real, and there is nothing real about this world.

If that awareness exists, I can't stand in that position at all.

What to do when you're worried that it's all just a lie, what to do when you're worried about facing the dark truth, what to do when you're worried about seeing yourself unreal.

Let's die, after all that has been said, it's still the characters who are talking, and they still just want to keep the characters.

Nothing can be saved, the character is dead.

The character of Yuan Changwen likes, cherishes, and fears, all of them will die.

My mother is no longer an old mother, my wife and children are just NPCs, and I myself am just actors on stage.

What happened is just what you are aware of, and it's not real at all.

There is nothing to hesitate about, or rather, the hesitation itself is just a pictorial element.

The whole world is not real, look at others and look at yourself, these are not real.

The continuity of time is only an illusion, and no matter how clever the illusion is, it still comes from "I believe".

Sit back and wait to die.

Think about it, too, this world is not real, so it has always been unreal, there is nothing to cross that chasm, that awareness has always been there.

I'm sure I'm going to die, because that's the only awareness.

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