Guan Qinghan smiled and avoided Lin Chuchu's gaze: "What am I not used to, it is more comfortable not to train, I can sleep early for a while." ”

Lin Chuchu approached her shrewdly: "Really, don't you want to go for additional training?"

Guan Qinghan glanced at her: "What the hell do you want to say? ”

"Do you really not understand, or do you pretend not to understand? You two quarreled?" Lin Chuchu held his chin and guessed in a low voice.

Guan Qinghan's dark brown eyes darkened slightly, and he pretended to be calm: "No." ”

Seeing her like this, Lin Chuchu was even more sure of his guess, and said with relief: "Okay, what's the big deal? After the Cold War for so long, he can also be a little softer, after all, he is the captain and the instructor, he will definitely die to save face, and he will not take the initiative to compromise......

"Don't say it, it's not what you think. Guan Qinghan interrupted her.

"What was that like? Did he kill you? Did he beat you? Or did he ......?"

Guan Qinghan shook his head, rejecting all her speculation.

"Then what's wrong with you? You have to tell me, aren't we two good friends? You don't even hide it from me, are you going to hold back your illness before you can say it?" Lin Chuchu was a little anxious, put her shoulders on her shoulders, and asked.

"How can it be as serious as you said, I will be fine soon, I ......" said this, but his heart had already collapsed, Guan Qinghan's voice choked, and his eyes instantly turned red.

Lin Chuchu looked like a superwoman, who had always been strong, and Guan Qinghan was about to cry, and suddenly realized the seriousness of the matter: "You two, he ...... What did I tell you?"

Guan Qinghan bit his lip, suppressed his tears, and said in a low voice: "In the past, I went to the training to be able to see him twice, as long as I can see him, I will feel at ease, but now, I don't have any thoughts." ”

"What do you mean?" Lin Chuchu was nervous, his voice was raised, for fear of alarming other classmates, so he quickly lowered his voice again: "Did he say something that disappointed you?

Guan Qinghan smiled sadly: "I've been thinking about it for so many years, how can I die so easily? I just don't want to embarrass him anymore." ”

"What is he embarrassed about?" Lin Chuchu didn't understand, Guan Qinghan was so good, and he was 100% sincere, why was he still embarrassed?

Guan Qinghan stopped talking, frowning tightly between his eyebrows.

Lin Chuchu didn't ask any further, but asked her, "Then what are your plans?"

The military training is almost over, and when Lei Zheng retires, they will return to school, and it will be difficult to meet again.

remembered that Chi Jinghan and Lei Zheng drank that day, and talked about Lei Zheng's plans after retiring, it seemed that he also talked about another thing: the family was urging marriage.

Could it be because Lei Zheng's family did not accept Guan Qinghan, so Guan Qinghan didn't want to embarrass Lei Zheng, so he didn't see him anymore and endured the pain silently?

"The people in Lei Zheng's family, have they seen you?" Lin Chuchu asked tentatively.

Guan Qinghan looked at Lin Chuchu in astonishment: "What did he tell you?" Or did Mr. Chi tell you?"

"No, they didn't say anything, I guessed, I guessed right?"

Guan Qinghan took a deep breath and nodded helplessly, but quickly shook his head again: "They didn't see me, but they should know my existence, that day I heard Lei Zheng talking to his family, Lei Zheng and his ...... Said, I have never had feelings between men and women, and some are just promises to my father. ”

That night, it was just such a coincidence, as soon as she arrived at the playground, she saw Lei Zheng standing under the tree and talking on the phone, listening to the tone of someone in his family.

Lei Zheng had his back to her, so he didn't know she was coming.

When she got closer, she heard Lei Zheng say irritably: "How could it be involved with Guan Qinghan?" She is the daughter of my captain, the captain died to protect me, I promised him to take good care of his daughter, yes, just because of the promise, there is no relationship between men and women at all, I have promised my grandfather, after retiring, I will obey his will and find the right person......

Guan Qinghan couldn't hear the next words clearly, and there was only a blank in his mind.

At this time, Lei Zheng noticed that there was someone behind him and turned his head sharply.

The two looked at each other, Guan Qinghan's tears suddenly burst the embankment, she raised her hand to wipe it, turned around and ran back to the dormitory.

After that day, Guan Qinghan never dared to face Lei Zheng, and at the same time, she was also tormented in her heart.

When she couldn't bear it anymore, she secretly called Chi Jinghan, hoping that Chi Jinghan could tell her that Lei Zheng's words were to deal with her family, or if she really thought so.

If it's just to cope, then Guan Qinghan would rather have no name for the rest of his life, as long as he can accompany him.

But if it was his true words, then no matter how uncomfortable she was, she would never see him again.

Chi Jinghan has been hiding this matter from Guan Qinghan, thinking about what opportunity to tell her, but he didn't expect Lei Zheng to make a mistake on his side, so he can't hide it anymore.

White lies will only make Guan Qinghan continue to suffer, and the long pain is better than the short pain.

So Chi Jinghan told the truth: "That day in the ninth camp, I also asked him, and he told me very clearly that he has no love for you. ”

This sentence was like a basin of cold water, which extinguished all Guan Qinghan's hopes.

Her long-term efforts, the illusions she has had since she was a child, are all gone.

Tears finally burst out of his eyes, and Guan Qinghan's long-suppressed emotions were like the Yellow River bursting its banks, out of control.

"Chu Chu, do you know, I don't know what I'm doing these days, I'm so uncomfortable, I want to die, I tried to make myself die, but for so many years I have lived by the belief that I want to marry him, let me give up at this time, I can't do it, I really can't do it. ”

For the first time, Lin Chuchu saw Guan Qinghan crying like a child, and his whole body trembled helplessly.

It was also the first time that she realized that loving someone can be so unforgettable, and let go freely on the surface, but in fact, behind the scenes, it is piercing, full of holes, and it cannot be solved.

After the lights went out, Lin Chuchu coaxed Guan Qinghan to rest, and secretly sent a WeChat message to Chi Jinghan: "Why is Lei Zheng so hateful! If he hurts Guan Qinghan and doesn't say a word, won't he feel guilty?"

Chi Jinghan replied: "You know, you better leave this matter alone, let her think about it slowly, Lei Zheng will only cause more harm if she says more." ”

Lin Chuchu was still very entangled: "I don't understand, what's wrong with Guan Qinghan?

"If you want to see it, you can see it a long time ago, and if you can't see it, you can't see it ”

This kind of answer is very blunt and hateful, but Lin Chuchu understands that this is the reality.

To love you is to love, not to love you, to pull hard, is also not to love.

She didn't know how to persuade Guan Qinghan, so she could only accompany her more and respect her decision.

And her decision was to be silent and dashing.

The reason is very simple, she said: "I love him so much, I really don't want him to be embarrassed by me, so, knowing that he doesn't like me, even if I can't let go of this feeling, I have to give it up." ”

That's how she loves him.