Qin Zeyang looked at me with tears in his eyes, and I proudly reached out to wipe them away, smiling more ugly than crying. "What are you doing in the hospital? I hate the smell of the hospital the most, I always want to vomit when I smell too much, and I turn the river and the sea upside down, so you better let me go." ”

"Wanjing, don't be like this, treat it well, it's not hopeless. Qin Zeyang grabbed my hand and increased his strength. It felt like trying to say something.

I patted the back of his hand and said indifferently, "Look, you are so unconfident in what you say, how can you convince me? Qin Zeyang, you know what kind of character I am and what my own physical condition is, I know better than anyone else. ”

Qin Zeyang rose up to refute me, "Gu Wanjing, when did you become so pessimistic and desperate? What do you know well? The pain in the abdomen in the advanced stage of stomach cancer will continue for a long time, and it will become more and more painful, accompanied by nerve or periosteal pain. You fainted in pain last night, and you still said that you knew it? Do you really know it?! In severe cases, it may also cause jaundice, hepatomegaly, chest and ascites, and in severe cases, pleural fluid compresses the lungs and causes poor drainage, resulting in lung infection, or septic shock in severe cases. Your doctor has told you all this, have you? But have you remembered? You don't know that you can't smoke or drink because you don't know that you can't smoke or drink when you go out without any medicine?

I haven't told Qin Zeyang yet, but now I have a blurred vision. It stands to reason that stomach cancer patients rarely have this condition, but I do, am I more serious than them? When the pain intensifies, the pain is dim and my vision is blurred.

Maybe I'm stupid, looking at Qin Zeyang's anxious and uncomfortable appearance for me, in addition to being sorry, I still have a trace of warmth in my heart. I don't have any relatives in this world, and although I am a close husband and wife with Lin Cheng, we are strangers. It's been almost two months since we got married, and between us, we tried our best to torture each other, and it was only in the past few days that he wanted to let go with me.

"Alright, don't count me down. Go sleep for a while, it's almost dawn, and even though it's the weekend, I'm embarrassed to ask you to stay up all night for me. I looked at it, and there was still a sofa in the room, so I had to aggrieve Qin Zeyang to rest on it temporarily.

"Gu Wanjing, I solemnly tell you, you have to take care of yourself now. Qin Zeyang said to his mouth, and then he choked up, and he could hear the sour taste in his nasal cavity.

I smiled at him and thought this man was still quite cute. When you get along as a friend, you can always see many good things in others.

Because people are always picky about their lovers.

"Because you're not alone anymore, don't be too willful. As he spoke, Qin Zeyang took out a few pieces of paper from his trouser pocket, looked at them, and then handed one to me. As if the verdict was announced, Qin Zeyang's tone was filled with indescribable helplessness and regret. "You're pregnant, two months at the time of the medical report. ”

It's obviously a festive thing, but when you come to me, it's six gods and no owner. The news of the airborne arrival caught me off guard.

I stupidly looked at the circle of patterns on the ultrasound report, because I had experience in prenatal check-ups before, and I quickly found the dot on the pattern that represented a small life. Looking at the report, I was completely confused.

How can I describe that indescribable emotion? Joy is mixed with sadness, sadness is mixed with despair.

How can I conceive this child with a body like mine? I can't protect myself, how can I fulfill my obligations as a mother?

I now eat less and less day by day, and the time for each meal is getting longer and longer, although I chew and swallow slowly, I always have indigestion, and many times things are eaten and discharged directly, and I don't digest them at all. Sometimes, even if I don't eat, I don't feel hungry and my body is getting thinner and thinner. The feeling of being light and fluttering in the body is clear only to yourself.

"The doctor said you probably didn't know you were pregnant. Because you know that you have stomach cancer and vomit frequently, you may mistakenly think that your morning sickness is due to the stomach and have not been checked carefully. Qin Zeyang looked at me sadly, as if he was brewing something, but it was always difficult to speak.

I looked him in the eye. This man has a pair of eyes that are completely different from Lin Cheng, Lin Cheng is big and bright, and when he is indifferent, it is like a cold pool, deep and mysterious, revealing a cold light, which is terrifying. As for Qin Zeyang, it is always clear and bright, without that deep feeling, like a puddle of clear water, you can see the bottom at a glance, when you are sad, there is a layer of fog in your eyes, like dense water vapor, it looks forbearing, and it is a little sad.

Just like now.

I was so overwhelmed by the sudden news that I couldn't say a word. I asked myself like a drum in my heart, what should I do now? What should I do? Can I give birth to a child with a body like this? God knows how sorry I am that child left me three years ago.

Thinking about it, tears soared. All my strength, disguised or genuine, collapsed at this moment, and I didn't hear my own cries, all of them were drowned out by the worry of my inner doubts.

"Wanjing, do you want this child?" Qin Zeyang reached out to wipe the tears from my face, then patted my face gently, and asked me with some hesitation, "Do you want this child?"

I looked at Qin Zeyang with blurry tears, nodded without thinking about it, determined and persistent, "Qin Zeyang, I want it, I want it." ”

"However, your current physical condition is not suitable for ........ I asked the doctor, you have a problem with the nutritional support of your body now, what should you do with the child in the future? It may be a bit cruel to say, but Wanjing, you and Lin Cheng have come to a long time, you have to cure your own illness first, do you say yes? The child will have it in the future, but you, there is only one!" Qin Zeyang said with a serious taste.

I knew it.

I kept shedding tears until Qin Zeyang went out to buy me breakfast. He didn't sleep all night, he was just slightly tired.

After he left the room, I got up to wash up and looked at the mirror in the bathroom in a daze. Against the backdrop of the white hospital gown, my face became more and more pale, and it was pale with a dull yellow. Maybe after a while, it will turn yellow.

Above the left clavicle there are a lot of large, hard, inactive fused metastatic lymph nodes. Although I can't see any big changes on the right side of the drink, I can feel it as long as I reach out and touch it.

These are all indications of an exacerbation. I ignore it every day and force myself not to think about it, because just thinking about it makes me feel terrible inside.

Fighting with Zhao Suyun was the only time I could feel happy in that home. The rest of the time, except for reading books and surfing the Internet, I always sit on the balcony, thinking about what will happen when I die.

When I found out that I had stomach cancer, I wasn't afraid of dying at all. At that time, it was a difficult time, and I even thought, it's better to die, and I don't have to look at the disgusting world anymore. But everything has changed, since I reunited with Lin Cheng. He tried his best to take me back to Nanjing, get married, and share a bed. Even if we torture each other, I think that my incompromising body can last a little longer.

I don't know when it started, but I became afraid of death. Maybe it's the day when the vomiting gets worse.

Actually, I often ask myself, Gu Wanjing, is it really Lin Cheng who forced you to come back? Even if he uses all his means, you can't obey whether you live or die, what can he do to you?

After all, you have expectations in your heart, but you don't want to admit it.

Before Qin Zeyang came back, I packed myself, because I had no clothes to change, I had to wear yesterday's evening dress. I didn't eat breakfast, low blood sugar made my head a little dizzy, and my feet were fluttering on high heels.

When I got out of the hospital, I was hungry and wanted to buy food at the stall, but I found that I forgot to take my bag. If you go up to get it, you will definitely meet Qin Zeyang at this time, and you won't be able to leave when the time comes. I stood at the intersection and flagged down a taxi to go home.

On the way, I have thought about everything.

After arriving home, the driver was waiting outside, and I went into the house and asked Wu's mother to take the money out.

Zhao Suyun and Lin Cheng were both in the living room, as if they had just gotten up. Lin Cheng glanced at me dejectedly, and the indifferent light in his eyes swept around me, only to feel cold.

Zhao Suyun sat in a wheelchair, looked at me with sharp and vicious eyes, full of filthy words and sarcasm, counting Luo Lin Cheng married a water-based poplar woman and came back all day and night as if he had picked up a treasure.

"Do you know that you will come back? You don't return at night, and you are embarrassed to say that you are a wife? Which man did you go out with?" the cold snort came out of his nose, with a hint of irony. Zhao Suyun is sarcastic, I think she is farting, but Lin Cheng said this, I don't feel good in my heart.

I guess Zhao Suyun had already discussed with him before I came back, and I was fooling around with wild men last night.

"Lin Cheng, keep your mouth clean, you have read books, don't be virtuous with your mother, and spew feces all over your mouth. Lin Cheng threw the newspaper in his hand and walked towards me, angry.

"What do you want? "Domestic violence?" I looked at him sideways, not the slightest fear.

The problem with both of us is that neither of us will back down, neither of us will admit defeat.

Wonderful ♥ Pen ♠ Court

"Gu Wanjing, I thought you were a woman from a good family, but I didn't expect to be the same as your sister, all of them are cheap. Heh, no matter what reason you use to prevaricate me, I won't believe you, because you think that when you come to Qin Zeyang's shoulder, I can see it clearly!"

Without hesitation, I raised my hand and slapped Lin Cheng.

Seeing this, Zhao Suyun rolled out of his wheelchair and came over, pointed at my nose and scolded me, "You are embarrassed to beat my son when you go out to steal people and come back? Gu Wanjing, you have a little conscience when you are cheap! Why, where do you want to know the company's secrets in Qin Zeyang? Seeing that he is the legal adviser?"

I stared at Lin Cheng with an expressionless face, pointing at Zhao Suyun and telling her to shut up.