Chapter 110: The First Step 410
Is it so hard to settle for "I don't know"?
What kind of distortion is it that I have to know?
There was a lot of talk, a lot of theories, a lot of ideas, a lot of thoughts, and a lot of stench.
Why do you feel so disgusting?
Noise, all are noises.
Luckily, no one could force me.
Countless baseless affirmations are clearly just personal preferences, but they are preached there as if they were true.
There are so many things to care about, to be busy, and it seems that without these things you will die.
I didn't know what to kill, I didn't know how to continue, and the devouring sensation never stopped. When I shift my attention, I don't experience devouring for a while.
Once I calmed down, the devouring sensation enveloped me again.
Whether it's good or bad, I don't know.
The twists in my head kept grabbing me and making me think and weigh in, and this is the way I've been using it for so many years. It's not too effective, but it looks pretty good, at least I didn't pick up the junk because of the twist in my head.
And the fear of discarding the brain, as if it is impossible to ignore it at all.
What kind of person I am, and how normal I used to be to introduce myself, now sounds extremely uncomfortable. There's nothing more disgusting than a character, but I can't get rid of it.
How cowardly, how sad, how embarrassing.
Yuan Changwen didn't know what else he wanted, but he didn't finish the killing. Lonely in the depths of this lake, in the darkness looking forward to something even darker.
Talking about the past, talking about their glory, but never thinking about whether all this happened. I know it's a weird idea, but it doesn't go away when it comes to it.
What is friendship, is the existence of friends still a product of fear? I don't want to talk about these things, how characters are constructed, what are the mechanisms of characters, this kind of stuff based on causality and time assumptions, shit isn't.
If it's not true, it's over.
If this world is not real, then everything in this world is over. There is nothing to discuss, and the so-called discussion is just a kind of procrastination.
I'm not real, I don't have a me, I don't have a mind.
The price of truth is everything, and all of it will dissipate in the face of reality. Because there are no characters in reality, and everything I know is based on characters.
What will happen, what will happen, I don't know.
Only at this moment, I am standing at this moment, then this is this moment. As ridiculous as it sounds, everything is a visual element that is perceived at the moment. There is no such thing as the next moment, although the existence of the next moment is very reasonable, but a person who is deeply embedded in the present moment will not think of such a thing as the next moment.
Nor will I think that the last moment, what is the real existence.
Why can't I fly? What's impossible?
So, can I fly? I don't know.
I'm not saying "I can't fly", I'm not saying "I can't fly", it's just so unreasonable.
Sadness and gloom gripped me, and the sunshine seemed to me to be a disservice. Because of such a wonderful sky and white clouds, I couldn't experience it at all, but a wave of devouring permeated my surroundings.
It's not true.
Although nature is magical, it is still unreal.
Twelve or thirteen-year-olds are no different from adults, and the future is just a fear. In fact, human beings should still be able to grow up and grow up to be not afraid of life.
Perhaps, the picture element I perceive is the whole thing, that is, the presentation of the picture element. Whether it is the scenery in front of you or the thinking in your head, it is the presentation of the elements of the picture.
What do I know?
Obviously, everything in my head is speculation, and I know that the distortion in my head is not 100% affirmative, but it will still be directly regarded as true.
Where is the probability, it's just that I don't know enough.
These distortions in my mind have built the character of Yuan Changwen, and I am still in it. What else is there to say? Kill or not.
There is a stench of falsehood, and one day I will not be able to bear it. Keep fearing, keep deceiving, and one day I'll burn it all down.
Reason is already on the verge of collapse, and it won't be long before the whole character burns ablaze. Burn the role, life, and life all clean.
What are you doing when you sit down? What are you doing when you stop? Are you protecting your sanity? Are you trying to keep yourself a qualified member of society?
I was shaped by the times, and all this was not my choice at all. Falsehood is perfect, and although falsehood is the goal, falsehood is falsehood.
What are you?
Who is qualified to dictate to me? Are you omniscient? Do you exist?
It's all because of you, it's beautiful because of you, it's wonderful because of you. However, unreal is unreal, and although your deception is good, I will wake up.
Who's going to wake up?
I never seem to be able to understand this problem, thinking is just the presentation of the elements of the picture, how can I understand things beyond the elements of the picture, and how can the character imagine the state without the character?
Old, young, beautiful, handsome, it seems that the world is great, beautiful and exciting. Your means are superior, and I respect you only because I exist because of you.
But the greatest respect is contempt. Because you don't exist, and I don't exist.
I have a lot to say, and it seems that I can't die yet. However, it is not oneself who dies at all. This is not my own role, let me manifest in your presence.
In chaos, Yuan Changwen seemed to be unable to control his thinking at all, obviously there was no block, but he couldn't move forward.
This thinking is not me, how can I get rid of the elements of the picture? The point is, I don't need to get rid of it at all, because I've never been bound.
How far is the distance between the mind, and that awareness?
What was missing to keep me in the way of non-existent obstacles?
The sense of devouring is strong, or the reason is stronger. There has never been a time when I have been so disgusted with my own sanity. That kind of analysis is just nonsense, and since it is not omniscient, then it is bias.
What a simple truth, how else to tell it?
Thinking that the mind is omniscient in a certain area is still just a reassurance, a compromise with the distortion of the mind.
Death, why are you so far away from me? Could it be that the Grim Reaper cutie has also abandoned me? No, it is I who have abandoned the Grim Reaper cutie, I have chosen to ignore it, and I can't feel the existence of death.
Yuan Changwen wanted to smash his head like smashing a watermelon.
Nothing is true, such a simple truth, but I have protected myself with emotions for so many years. Even, after seeing that he used emotions to protect himself, he was still defeated by emotions.
Throw away the twist in your head, throw away the character, throw away yourself.
There is no me in this world, nothing is there. ()
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