"What else can I pursue" -

World, I still don't understand why you let me come to your arms. Pen | fun | pavilion www. ｂｉｑｕｇｅ。 infoDo you want me to protect you, or do you want me to hurt you? Do you want me to be the main character, or do you want me to be someone else's supporting role? Time has not yet been decided, it has been almost twenty-one years.

If it weren't for those two heart-wrenching accidents, I wouldn't have been able to exist at all. Perhaps, I almost became the third accident. But with him and her, love has given me new health and the happiness of the world. I can understand nothing, as long as there is his and her love, I am content. This is how I didn't understand the adult world at the beginning.

You have brought me to this ordinary small rural family and felt the happiness of nature that many urban children cannot feel. Sooner or later, I will be able to experience the life in the city, but the life in the countryside may not be able to be experienced by the city people. I have never complained that I was born in the countryside, and the joy of rural natural life is sometimes incomparable to technological life.

Rural areas also have pursuits, and the direction is urban living standards. Both he and she gave me a dream --- to go to university. I didn't object, but I would have loved to. As long as it is his and hers' wishes, I am willing. This was the purest me at that time.

Growth, full of everything. The three of them have cultivated me, and they will really accompany me for the rest of my life. A lot of what I'm doing now, the hobbies and the specialties I have, will be connected to them. This is the kinship of sister and brother. The family is supported by him and her, beautified and enriched by the three of them, so that I can enjoy the love of the whole family alone. I was really a happy kid at that time!

If there is love in a small family, everyone will have it too. My grandfather before his death really loved me, but I couldn't repay him anything. Now my grandmother, who is alone in my hometown, also loves me too, I hate myself for learning badly, and I can't always be filial to her. And cousins and cousins, although there are occasional conflicts, but the family affection remains the same, everyone is still everyone.

Friendship and love are the chaos that I can't tell the difference the most. Sweet and sour, sour and sweet, and in the end there is only the bitterness of pain.

I want to escape, but I can't! The shackles lock my heart together......

I put it down, but I picked it up stupidly. Later, he threw it away, but he secretly found it back. I really don't understand this......

Today, everything has changed.

It's been a year since I was admitted to university, and the dreams he and she gave me are gone, and the three of them have their own things to do, and they have their own worlds. What else can I pursue? I've read so many inspirational books, but I always won't use them, what's the use? I don't know when my outlook on life has quietly deteriorated! The simple and simple me has long since disappeared, and the numb and ignorant me can't leave......

"Live for yourself, not for others. Every time I see this, I think, if I really did this, what kind of person would I become? Maybe not human, but demonic!

The world, what does my existence mean to you? I'm just a fantasizing person. In my imagination, nothing is impossible. However, when it comes to reality, it is almost impossible. I really can't think of anything else I can pursue......

But when I looked at him and her who were still working hard for me, my sadness seemed to tell me what I was really pursuing......

"So, One Day" -

Yesterday, it was complicated.

In the morning, it wasn't interesting. But this Mao Zedong Thought class touched me a little.

Because, the teacher taught a lesson about Marx. Of course, I have already experienced his spirit in junior high school and high school. Knowing that he had a great friendship, it was Engels. But I didn't know that his love was so great!

I was shocked by the love poems he wrote to his beautiful wife, Yanni, and suddenly it dawned on me that my infatuation at this time was nothing! I was just exaggerating how good and perfect it was. Actually, it's all about deceiving yourself. Cover up your hypocrisy with this outwardly beautiful but inwardly absurd excuse. This lesson, I wasn't sleepy, it was really good!

In the afternoon, there are no classes. But I'm busy because I have to review the knowledge of the retake.

The problem, however, is that I don't necessarily review. It's all a consequence of poor self-control, and I play the game of buckles. I thought the afternoon would be spent like this......

However, there are many variables in life.

Suddenly, a part-time job came up. I struggled and didn't know if it was good to go.

The salary is eight yuan an hour, which is not much. It's just, I'm going to play a game.

Thinking about it later, I haven't done a part-time job yet, so it's not bad to experience it. Anyway, I'm not in a good mood, so I might be better off with a part-time job.

So, at half past two in the afternoon, twenty people gathered together, squeezed into a small van, and rushed to what I thought was Nanhai, Foshan.

On the way, there was a traffic jam......

In the traffic jam, I couldn't resist the sleepiness, so I dreamed.

When I woke up, it had been more than an hour, and I could go to Guangzhou! Finally, it was smooth, but who knows, I really arrived in Guangzhou...... I'm dizzy!

Finally, at five o'clock in the afternoon, get off at the entrance of the Garden Hotel.

When the person in charge of the hotel came out and said something, my heart beat faster and I was a little afraid.

Because, the anti-Japanese march in Guangzhou the day before yesterday had a great impact. Therefore, there are a lot of armed police patrols in the hotel, and you can't talk nonsense. Moreover, the people from the Japanese consulate are also in the hotel. Hey, in short, very nervous!

Inside, there are too many rules.

You have to cut your nails, you have to glue the bangs that cover your eyebrows with gel water, you have to wear black socks, and if you don't have them, you have to buy them there for two dollars, etc.

After eating and changing into the overalls there, I don't feel cool anymore. Because there are no pants that fit!

The leg of the pants was only at my heel, and the person in charge asked me to loosen the belt to barely fit. This kind of shape makes me see myself crying in the mirror. Forget it, part-time job, that's it.

Then, the person in charge assigned each person to a different position and began to experience the part-time job life.

I was assigned to a place that dealt with the sorting of after-dinner dishes. Here, there is happiness and helplessness.

I have to quickly remember the places where the person in charge took me, and after I remember, almost all of them are on two floors. Going down and up, up and down, none of this is a problem. The problem is, I am often blamed for making mistakes. However, it has also been overcome, and there is still progress.

When I work, it's actually night. It just so happens that the rich second generation got married tonight, and the bride is not good, but the four bridesmaids are really beautiful!

This kind of wedding is really enviable! In the future, when I have money, I also want to hold a drink in a hotel.

But when I see the dishes that I throw away without eating much, can I waste money like this? The poor people don't eat as well as the ones they throw in the trash. No wonder the rich get richer and the poor get poorer.

The work is also a bit of a mouthful. I was looking forward to the arrival of the Mid-Autumn Festival because I wanted to eat egg yolk mooncakes. Who knows, there are also egg yolk mooncakes there, and I eat them so deliciously. Finally, after a few hours, I finally returned to school. When I go, I hope that one day I can go in and eat in a different capacity. Uh-huh......

On the way back to school, one of the girls threw up. A boy sitting next to me happened to be eating candy again, and later, the boy was very concerned and handed the girl candy and told her to take a look at the bad smell and sweet mouth in the car. I think this boy really cares about people! Look at himself who is numb, speechless......

When I entered the school, it was already half past eleven o'clock in the evening, and the doors downstairs of the dormitory were locked. Alas, the dormitory manager also slept......

There just happened to be a couple who couldn't get in when they came back, so forget it, let them call the dormitory manager.

I sat on the ladder and played with my phone, and after a long time, I finally returned to my dorm.

It was late at night, and after another bath, it was already twelve o'clock.

Hopefully, it's still there, right?

And so, a day......

"Yesterday's Sense, Today's Sense"——

At this hour, it should be to dream in a deep sleep. However, there were so many thoughts that my mind forced my body to stay up all night.

It's early in the morning, and it's a new day. In other words, the feeling of last night has accompanied me into a future again. Call......

Yesterday, it was numb.

I slept in the early hours of the morning, the crazy alarm clock at seven o'clock, the bed for half an hour, the breakfast of soy milk at eight o'clock, the long queue for more than ten minutes in the examination room, the cold wind that blew my nose, the hearing of the god horse who didn't know what to do, the energetic clock above the blackboard, the pen that did not obey the call, the calmness after handing in the papers, the water blowing after the exam with classmates in the canteen, lending the meal card to the senior brother who was going to go to the internship again, the smirk after returning to the dormitory, the idol drama that I watched in junior high school for more than four hours, the evening sleep for two hours, and the stupidity for two hours。 Finally, it was ten o'clock in the evening.

Last night, the wind was really strong, and it made people feel suffocated.

I still habitually go out shopping alone, just want to buy a new pair of shoes to wear, and no shoes are healthy anymore.

I need healthy shoes to accompany me to play and meet the challenges of ups and downs.

Perhaps, the weather is too cold for many people to go out. Perhaps, it's a little late, and everyone is going to stay at home.

A person, looking at his own shadow, chatted with himself with feeling. The lights on the road did not embellish the beauty of the night, but only set off my loneliness. The wind blew my hair so messy. I didn't tidy it up, and let it blow as if it were rare......

Looking at the closed shops, I didn't complain, I just walked forward very calmly. Naturally, I feel at ease when I look at the people and scenery around me. This feeling is much better than the feeling of being in a daze in the dormitory, and I really don't feel any cold when I walk like this. I think it's a diversion of attention, but I believe that if the heart is relaxed, everything will go smoothly.

Almost all the shoe stores are closed, except for the Markor store, but I personally think the quality of this is not good. So, the purpose shifted from buying shoes to buying coats.

Walking to the place where the stalls often sell clothes, the sellers at those stalls packed up their things and went home, and there was only one stall left.

I just rely on the mentality of fate to pick clothes, and buy the right ones. I saw a brown and white mixed jacket with a lot of feeling, tried it on, and it really fit! However, the white part of this coat is a little dirty, and it should be stained by the frequent friction of the goods.

I asked the boss if there were any new ones. The boss said that there was only this one.

I was disappointed. The boss told me to look at the others, but I didn't feel anything else. Even if it's the same style, but the color is different, I don't like it either. In the end, I can only go to the meeting with a loss......

On the way back, I always felt that I had no fate with that dress. But as I walked, it seemed that I had given up on this fate. If I buy that dress, won't my relationship with that dress continue? It's a little dirty, but it can be washed, and I can buy it at a cheaper price.

The more I think about it, the more I regret it. It's rare to come across clothes that you like at first sight, and they fit so well. However, if you miss it, you miss it, and there is nothing to regret, which is also a good experience.

I've been thinking about what I'd do if that dress was like the girl in my life, in other words, if I met a girl I liked in the future, and after a while, I found that she would be a good fit for me. However, she has been in love many times, and she is no longer a virgin, and it is like the stain on that dress, which cannot be completely washed.

If there was such a she, would I give up on her as I did with the dress? I don't know......

However, if it is true love, it will not give up. is like the kind of true love of the heroes and heroines of the "ladder" who were very hot some time ago, regardless of the eyes of the world.

For the future, I can only guess.

And buying clothes is nothing at all, after all, women are not clothes.

Walk, walk, the wind is stronger. I just remembered that I hadn't eaten dinner yet......

Thinking of this, the other one made me feel sad inexplicably. Alone pacing full, his stomach growling with hunger, and the wind sarcastically mocking his body.

It turned out that he had pity on himself......

Seriously, I'm sorry for myself, I'm really sad! I didn't even let myself eat, as for it?

Go back to the dorm and get everything done. I started to feel sorry for myself again, and I didn't even let myself sleep.

It's written and written, and it's not far from dawn......