_id="u1749455";

I cooked Xu Yi once, it was the last time he was sick, but at that time he was going to be delirious so he didn't eat anything, and I put the rest in a plastic bag in the refrigerator, and then I don't know if he ate it or threw it away.

Rarity goes grocery shopping and locks me in the kitchen when she returns, and the two of them continue to work outside.

As for what I'm busy with, I really don't know, I secretly watched, and then Xu Yi quickly reacted and looked up at me, which made me feel like I had done something bad and was discovered, but thinking about it, I didn't do anything wrong.

Getting along with Xu Yi is such a pattern, when he is bored, he will dig one trap after another around him, and then wait for you to jump in.

If you don't jump, he will greet you, and there is always a way to trick you.

But all this is not out of malice, to put it bluntly, he is too lonely. A person who is so omnipotent in the eyes of others can be lonely.

I made this meal very casually, not careful, the taste is average, not unpalatable, but not much better.

Xu Yi took a bite, and then put down his chopsticks.

Not to mention Rarity, who is a picky guy who would rather choose from imported supermarket cookies.

I did this mainly to distance myself from Xu Yi, and it was a big mistake to follow Rarity here today. I came to Beijing to find Chen Shi and accompany my boyfriend, but just now I realized that I had spent half a day staying at Xu Yi's house.

This thought made me feel particularly guilty.

I think that I can make Xu Yi understand that I really have no other thoughts about him, and I don't want that incident half a year ago to happen again.

Xu Yi is a lonely person, but he is also a generous person. He didn't say anything, he still picked up his chopsticks and ate all the dishes I cooked, but the atmosphere of those ten minutes was a bit weird.

He doesn't speak, and neither Rarity nor I speak.

But when he didn't speak, he often looked up at me.

I wanted to go but didn't dare to go.

Then he smiled, looked up and smiled at me, his eyes faintly reddened.

I accidentally put a lot of mustard on the plate of octopus he just ate, and I promise, this was really not intentional, but I didn't try to save it.

Then he left again, this is his home, and his departure like this is a very tactful mode of send-off. Rarity doesn't want to pay attention to me, but he can't leave me here and goes pack up.

As I go downstairs, I ask Rarity if I'm going too far, and he rolls his eyes and says forget it.

The two of us didn't get back to the office, but Rarity took me to the bus stop, and he gave me the address of the first bar where they performed the night and left.

Chen Shi worked very hard, spending time in the company during the day and rushing to three bars at night.

I called him on the way and he arrived earlier than I and was already waiting for me at the station when I got off the train.

Chen Shi wanted to take me to dinner, and I said I had eaten. He asks me where I went with Rarity in the afternoon, and I casually go to the library, but Chen doesn't ask again and takes me by the hand to the bar.

The bars here in Beijing are different from the ones we often go to, to put it bluntly, it is chaos, Chen Shi didn't agree to let me come over at first, but I really miss him, especially want to.

I came to him, in fact, I wanted to be together every second, and Chen Shi agreed when he heard me say that.

When they performed, I sat under the stage, and the specially arranged position, although it was remote, there were no people around, and it was very clean and would not be disturbed.

I watched Chen Shi from afar, and he would look at my side from time to time on stage, but he couldn't watch it for too long, and if he watched it for too long, someone would find out. We cherish every opportunity to see each other.

Really, at that time, I would feel that it was a very precious thing for two people to be together, and I couldn't compare with anything, and I couldn't exchange anything.

The second field was still on this street, and there was a break in between, and the four of us went for supper.

The food is also very simple, I didn't drink alcohol, when I looked up, I would find Chen Shi looking at me, probably because it was cold at night, the hot soup in the bowl would rise a layer of heat, the heat would spread, and Chen Shi's eyes would be foggy.

He suddenly reached out and touched my face.

It's a habit he's always had, but this time it's particularly light. Chen Shi asked me, "Isn't it hard?"

I shook my head and said with a smirk that I didn't.

It was impossible for the two of us to be so close to each other, and before we could say a word, Xonia said that it was too late.

Rushing to the scene, this is the feeling, at the beginning every day I feel very anxious, afraid of being late and afraid of making mistakes. Later, when I got used to it, I would squeeze out a little bit of free time in the middle, even if it would be harder later.

They're used to it, but it's the first time for me.

After settling the account, the three of them took the equipment and ran out, I can't do it, I can't keep up with the rhythm of these long-handed and long-footed boys, I can still catch up at first, Chen Shi also took my hand, and then I really couldn't do it, standing in place and panting.

I shook my head, "You guys go first." ”

Chen Shi wants to stay with me, just like every time we are separated, there will be a kind of reluctance in his eyes, but there is no way to give up, what should go is always to go.

That's the path he chose, and I chose, and I'm going to finish it crying.

On the most prosperous street in Beijing, I watched Chen Zhi and them run away little by little, standing in place to rest, at that moment, looking at his disappearing back, a feeling suddenly rose in my heart that I couldn't grasp.

Like flying a kite, we were together at first, then he gradually flew up, and then flew higher and higher, and all the lines in my hands were opened, but he still did not reach the height he wanted.

At this time, I can still take the thread back and get him back to me temporarily.

But one day, he can't just stay at this height, the line will break, and he will fly to a place where I can't catch up anymore.

I feel sad to think about that.

I said these words to Chen Shi in Chen Shi's arms that night, and he gently scratched my nose, "I am a kite in your hand, as long as you don't cut the string, no matter how far I fly, I can return to you." ”

But I said, "What if I cut it?"

What if one day, I can't bear to hold a kite that can fly very high and high in my hand?

We silently looked at each other and didn't want to say anything, Chen Shi and I always kept hugging this night, even if we didn't sleep very comfortably.

Chen Shi wanted to take a leave of absence to accompany me, but the people at the company wanted to make things difficult, so he took me to Rarity the next day.

Rarity looks at me and clears her throat, and I glared at him just in time to stop talking.

Rarity is still going to Xu Yina, I don't know what they've been busy with these two days, but I can't guess, there's nothing to guess, I'm not a particularly gossipy person.

Even if the two of them do get along, it's none of my business. In some ways, I really hope that Xu Yi can have a girlfriend or boyfriend who will make him pay attention, so that he won't always think about how to play with me.

Yes, it's fun.

I understand that Xu Yi's interest in me is definitely not distracted, but what I didn't understand is that Xu Yi really just wanted to tease me at first, but my repeated refusal made him more interested in this game.

Rarity and I say goodbye at the café, and he's busy with me, and I'm still on the agenda for today, I buy a cup of coffee, and I put on my headphones when I'm done, even if it's noisy.

I would be very attentive when I was doing the questions, and occasionally I would bring over the coffee and take a sip when I felt thirsty, but after a long time, the hot coffee turned into iced coffee when I drank it.

I don't remember the first time I raised my hand, and suddenly the cup of coffee was in my hand.

Then I didn't think much of it, took a sip, then let go of my hand and let the cup of coffee spill on my roll, and it spilled all over me. I don't have the heart to care about that, I just stick my tongue out.

It was a hot cup of coffee, so hot that my tongue was burned.

I guess I was embarrassed.

Xu Yi was similar, his expression was a little dazed. He also had a glass of water in front of him, and there were ice cubes in it.

I didn't have time to care about the rest, so I said with my tongue wide open, "Water, give it to me." ”

Xu Yi shook his hands and handed me the water. I took a sip of cold water, and I still felt like my mouth was on fire. I looked at Xu Yi, tears of pain came out, I felt that he was deliberately trying to fix me, he was retaliating.

But Xu Yi was also very helpless, he said that he came to the company to see me, and he felt that it was not good to drink cold coffee, so he bought it for me, and finally handed it to me.

My clothes were also dirty, and Xu Yi wanted to take me to buy clothes, but I said no. But I still took his car and asked him to take me back to the house where Chen Shi and they shared, there were so many people in the café, and if I talked to Xu Yi a few more times, maybe someone would find him here.

When I went out, Chen Shi put the key on me, and I opened the door, but I didn't let Xu Yi in.

He glanced inside and said wait for me downstairs.

I took a shower, and when I changed my clothes, I found that there was also a red mark on the side of my neck, which had just been burned, Chen Shi didn't have the habit of leaving marks on my body, and I had no experience with these, so naturally I wouldn't think much about it.

Downstairs, Xu Yi is really still there.

In fact, between me and Xu Yi, I was completely alone in the nervousness, at most I was really angry with him yesterday, but time passed, he still didn't take those seriously, and now he still opened the door generously to let me get into the car, and as before, he didn't shy away from turning sideways to help me buckle the seat belt.

But I didn't ask him to help, obviously refusing.

That day, Xu Yi took me to see how many blockages there are in Beijing, from the West Third Ring Road to the East Third Ring Road, which took two and a half hours.

I didn't want to talk much on the way, and Xu Yi didn't talk to me, I secretly looked at him, and suddenly felt that I was thinking too much. When I was leaving, I solemnly apologized for yesterday's incident, and it was rare for Xu Yi to smile and say that it was even.

He asked me again if I had a habit of living.

I knew it was referring to Chen Shi's dormitory, and I nodded and said it was okay.

Xu Yi squinted at me, "You like him so much?"

I like it, of course I like it, and the degree to which I like Chen Shi sometimes makes me wonder how far away I am, and they were two people who were far away from the beginning.

But we came together.

I have been shaken by this relationship before, but gradually, I will find that I am reluctant.

I don't know if Chen Shi also thinks that I like it so much, and I like it very much.

But I like Chen Shi, I really like it.

I bought food downstairs in the company and brought it to Chen Shi, he was about to get off work at this time, and when he saw me, he was flustered, and then asked me, "How did you change your clothes?"

I said, "I just accidentally got dirty." ”

Regarding Xu Yi's paragraph, I didn't deliberately want to hide it, but I bypassed it unconsciously.

But at this time, two little girls happened to pass by, and one of them said that he seemed to have seen Xu Yi's car downstairs.

I looked at Chen Shi and wanted to tell him about being with Xu Yi in the afternoon, but he took my hand and said, "Let's go." ”

Then Chen Shi took me to the lounge to eat, I ate a little bit, and left more for him. I like to see Chen Shi eating, Si Swenwen is very good-looking, and boys of his age eat a lot, Chen Shi too, he eats very seriously with his head down, and his face will be bulging.

I look at it and think that he must be very tired this day.

I treasure him so much, but he will be bullied by others outside. Sometimes I also hope that I can be very rich, so I will pay for Chen to recognize the album and make him popular again.

But I knew that none of this was what he wanted.

There were still three performances in the evening, and this time Chen Zhi took me and Xu Nia to go their separate ways, and he told me that he didn't want to leave me there alone like yesterday.

In fact, if Chen Shi accommodates my rhythm, he will be more tired at night.

I feel sorry for Chen Zhi, and Chen Zhi also feels sorry for me.

The two of us feel sorry for each other like this, and in some ways, we are tormenting each other.

At the moment, the long-distance relationship that is not completely complete has tossed the two of us like this, about the future, we used to look forward to it, but now it has become a dare not think, and we can only force ourselves to move forward with the determination to take one step at a time.

Something went wrong at the last show.

Chen Shi was late for me, but in fact, it was only a few minutes, and most people were forgiving.

In fact, the first few minutes of each show were all three of them out of breath, and the guests at the bar knew that a band like theirs had to rush a lot of times a night, so it wouldn't be particularly difficult for them.

But there will always be some unusual guests, the one who asked Chen Shi to toast on the day I came.

I hadn't seen that person, and I only found out about it later.

Chen Shi was asked to toast after the performance because he was late, they drank foreign wine, I don't know how strong it was, but Chen Shi drank a glass and his neck turned red, and finally he drank a whole bottle and was helped by a few of us before getting into the car.

Back in the dormitory, Xu Nia and the others left.

I put Chen Shi on the bed to help him wipe his face, he grabbed my wrist with red eyes, "Xiangxi, am I useless?"

I shook my head, "No." ”

I'm not very good at comforting, and I tend to be quiet in times like this.

Chen Zhi fell asleep and woke up in the second half of the night. I was also a light sleeper, and I woke up as soon as he moved, and then turned on the light. I don't know what other people's habits are when they're drunk, but Chen Shi came over and gnawed my mouth when he saw me wake up.

With your eyes closed.

The strength was not particularly heavy, but I was burned at noon, so I felt a lot of pain, and tears of pain came out. But I didn't want to interrupt him, so I endured it silently.

Chen Shi didn't notice it, he still kissed very emotionally, and tore open my clothes by the way.

I still shook when it hurt, and then Chen Shi opened his eyes, and we slowly separated.

He glanced over me, and finally his gaze fell on the red mark that had been burned on me. He looked at it like that, very carefully, as if he didn't understand anything, and suddenly he looked me in the eye again.

I had no idea what was going on, so I shook his arm, "What's wrong?"

Chen Zhi was still not fully awake, he rubbed his eyes, still looked at me, and finally said, "Sleep." ”

With that, he was lying down again, only this time with his back to me.

I whispered his name again, but there was no response, and then I gently put my arm around his waist from behind. He used to hold my hand, but not this time.

On the third day, Chen Shi still asked for leave, and he asked for leave the day before, wanting to accompany me well before I left.

But he had a cold, and he had drunk too much alcohol the night before, so he was not very well, and he was in bed all morning.

I don't know if he's awake or not, and I can't bear to call him when he looks so tired. In the morning, I make breakfast and put it next to him, and like every girl, I want to help my boyfriend tidy up the room at a rare meeting.

Chen Shi's room was actually very clean, except that there were some books and magazines on the table, and then there were clothes.

In the summer, he had to change his clothes every day, and Chen Shi didn't like to share the washing machine with others, so he washed his clothes by hand.

I was afraid of disturbing his sleep, so I took my clothes out and washed them. I'm really not very good at washing clothes, and I'm afraid that I won't be able to wash them clean, so I washed everything carefully for a long time, and it was noon when everything was done.

When I returned to the room, I saw that Chen Shi was still in the same position as in the morning, lying on his side on the bed, and his breakfast had not moved at all.

When I got closer, I realized that he had actually opened his eyes.

I squatted down in front of Chen Shi, took one of his hands, and tested the temperature on his forehead again.

"Are you feeling unwell?"

Chen Shi didn't speak, turned around, and changed his direction with his back to me.

I went to take his hand, but he ignored me.

The rare time to get together seems to have been delayed for a whole morning. If it was before, I would have lost my temper, but now looking at Chen Shi, I actually don't have a temper at all.

I just wanted to do something for him.

All I'm afraid of is that he doesn't need me to do anything for him.

When I went out of the room, I saw Xiao Lei and the musician with pigtails, they hugged at the door, and then the musician kissed Xiao Lei's neck.

I had already turned my head at that time, but Xiao Lei greeted me with a smile, and I had to turn my head to look at her again, and only after seeing the red mark on her neck did I understand why Chen Zhi was like this.

After lunch was ready, I still put it in the same position, and I don't know if Chen Shi would eat it, because I was leaving in the afternoon. If no one sends me, I have to go to the train station very early.

I began to pack up the two clothes I had brought with me, as well as the food I had brought for Chen Shi.

After putting everything in order, I saw the box of condoms I had brought that day, which we had only used for the first day. I still remember the way Chen Zhi smiled evilly and said twelve.

In the end, we only used one.

I put it in the drawer next to the bed, and for a moment, I felt the urge to cry.

I remember someone saying that if they could do it all over again, they would most like not to have that torn condom, but the truth is that there is no real restart in this world.

What can't be restored to the original state is not the torn condom, but the heart that has been really giving.

I have given Chen Zhi, I have no regrets, and I have never thought of regretting it.

Because I know he won't regret it.

Before leaving, I put away the key that Chen Shi gave me, and took out the lunch that had been cold and warmed it again. I still hugged him from behind, the temperature and feeling that I was familiar with.

I said, "I didn't want to lie to you, I was indeed with Xu Yi yesterday." I was burned by coffee and he was there at the time, so he sent me back to change my clothes. ”

Chen Shi still didn't speak.

"Then I'll go, you take care of yourself. I'll take a leave of absence next week. ”

The way back is different from when you came, because it feels different. When you come, you will feel that the time is very fast, but when you go back, it will only feel that the road is very long, as if you can't walk anywhere.

There was no traffic jam on this day, and I quickly arrived at the train station, but after waiting in the waiting hall for a long time, I thought that Chen Shi would still come.

I still looked at my phone before checking the ticket, but Chen Shi didn't call or send a text message.

It's still impossible not to be sad at all.

Follow the crowd to the platform, the radio has already begun to urge, but I just can't seem to go fast, not only because of the heavy luggage on my hands, but also because something seems to be dragging down.

Chen Shi still came to me.

I heard him call out to me, but we were a long, far apart by that time.

The radio reminds you of the departure time again.

I waved my hand at him, very hard.

He shouted my name and was still stopped outside.

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