When I first started killing, I always thought that those people and things were arrogant in my head, and I couldn't do it if I didn't kill them. Moreover, he is very skeptical that his ability can be killed. My mother is here, my family is here, my dreams are here, my laughter is here, can I really kill myself?

But now, I find myself unable to seem to keep these things. At the beginning, I was thinking about how to kill while retaining my humanity, and how to kill my parents' influence in my head while retaining my intimate relationship with my parents. But now, I don't want to let my parents into my mind anymore.

I can't keep my former self, and I can't keep my close relationship with my parents. After killing the influence of his parents in his brain, he naturally no longer wants to continue to have anything to do with his parents.

If something happens to my parents, if my parents are sad because of me, can I still be heartbroken like I once was? Can I still hold on to such feelings?

The avenue is ruthless, and who knows what kind of ruthlessness this ruthlessness is? Is it like a stone?

Not at all, it didn't come to this point, and the so-called ruthlessness of the avenue is just a guess of the characters. I see it now, even if it's just a little bit, but it's also a presence that I can't believe. At the same time, it feels like a matter of course.

For me, parents are no longer synonymous with warmth, nor are they any warm harbor or anything like that. Even if I go back once in a while, even if I don't live with my parents, even if I used to look forward to going home. But now, none of that is there.

Or rather, these things are disappearing. I grew sick of this emotion, because it was false, and filial piety was not something sacrosanct. Falsehood is falsehood, and even if the whole world agrees, it cannot change the nature of falsehood.

It is useless to say anything, such as the benefits of filial piety, the virtues of society, the traditions that have been passed down for thousands of years, filial piety makes society harmonious, filial piety makes a family feel at ease, filial piety makes the empire prosperous, it is useless to say these things. Like a puppy on the verge of death, he uses all means to survive on his own.

The more you say, the more you prove it to be false. Real is real, I don't know, but I certainly can't get rid of it. It's just self-righteous to get rid of, like you can not know where you are, but you can never change where you are.

I keep falling in the lake, can I change that I am not in the lake because I don't know that I am in the lake? I can hallucinate that I am in the sky, that I am in the Empire, but just "I think".

Yuan Changwen felt like a long rod that had been bent, and he didn't know when it would "snap" and break. The discomfort kept coming, and the things I once cared about gradually began to dissipate. Despite the fears, I know it won't be long.

Or, you can end your life. It's just false, there's nothing to care about. Even if you care, it's just the presentation of the picture elements. What is there to believe in your own thinking? Perhaps, it's okay just to kill, but what about the rest?

I haven't finished the slash yet, and the rest is just a distraction. Maybe there are a lot of reasons, maybe they make a lot of sense, maybe the whole world agrees with them, but it's still just a distraction for me.

I don't know when it began, the word "companionship" seems so warm, as if a thousand words can't compare to silent companionship. Whether it is the company of a partner, or the company of parents and children, it seems to be another thing that must be repaid.

Love, this thing itself is artificially distorted, and it is forcibly loaded. It's just that I have been taught like this since I was a child, and I have gradually become accustomed to it. The inherent goodness of human nature is nothing more than wishful thinking, and there is no such thing as human nature at all.

Trees don't grow because they love life. Letting trees die is likewise not loving death. Ruthlessness is not the opposite of human nature, but it doesn't care about anything at all.

I just do it, and I don't feel proud of anything because I conform to affection, and I don't feel ashamed of anything because I betray human nature. I just go with the flow, just letting things happen through my hands.

Too many ideas, too many opinions, it's not that the character of Yuan Changwen shouldn't have these ideas. It's to see that these are just the thoughts of Yuan Changwen's character, and they have nothing to do with me. Often when you see this, those thoughts will dissipate on their own.

Of course, I don't seem to be doing that. To kill, to see the distortions in your own mind, to see how those distortions are real, and how to believe in the distortions in your head. When I see a distortion, I naturally don't want to believe it, at least I do.

Or rather, I remember me like this.

What else is there to keep? This world does not exist, all the thoughts are just "I think", and even this "I think" is just a picture element.

There is no movie comic that makes a character doubt his existence, and it is all natural to think that he is real. Even if there is, it just makes the character jump out and become another false existence. Killing the author is a victory? As long as it is a limitation, it is a falsehood.

What you see with both eyes is false. Nothing is not false, and in this world, everything in this world, whether it is the universe or the planet, whether it is morality or affection, or the elusive mind, is false.

It seems that his slash seems to be remarkable, but it is also only a false existence. Every thought is just killing its corresponding thought, and if it is used, it will be thrown away. Whatever the idea is, it's just a picture element. Even if I know that the thought is an element of the picture, the idea is also a picture element.

I am not the character of Yuan Changwen, nor am I this thinking. Body, mind, view, etc., nothing is mine. These are only the elements of the picture that I perceive, what belongs to me? On the other hand, there is only that awareness, and what is not that awareness?

There is nothing but that awareness, all of this is that awareness, and that awareness is everything. So, what doesn't belong to me?

A distortion in the brain is a piece of shit, whether measured in terms of money or happiness, believing that the distortion in the brain will only divert from success. The ship of life has not yet set sail before it has hung up.

Yuan Changwen knew that he hadn't gotten rid of the distortion in his mind yet, but it wasn't long before he could die soon. When the time comes, the distortion in my mind will naturally no longer be able to manipulate me.

The character has to die, how can a fake thing control my life? These fake things are not qualified to be arrogant in my head. It's not a discussion, it's not a trade-off, it's just a killing.

Go on, my slash, it's not done yet. Even if you never finish it, you won't re-believe the distortion in your head, even if it will seem more gregarious.