It was very hot and humid, and the sound of the waves crashing on the beach could be heard in the distance, ringing in my ears.

"Tell me, what are you thinking?" asked me.

I nestled in the crook of his arm, struggled to lift my head, looked into his inquiring gaze, and hid my head around his neck.

"Is there something uncomfortable?" he wrenched my body over and looked at him, his eyes so gentle that it was addictive.

Yes, it's really choking to think about what has happened in recent days. Lin Yue's appearance, the rumors, and Lemis's unpredictable request to meet......

"Musa," I asked him in an air of warmth and weakness, "will you not be uncomfortable, to your family, and ...... To Lemis. ”

Mosa looked at me and said, "This is the first time you've asked me about Remis. ”

"Yes. I took a deep breath, my voice barely audible, "I didn't dare to ask before, but now I think I should." I leaned close to him and pressed it to his face, "Why are you always so positive?

"Don't you think I will?" he asked rhetorically in a calm voice.

"I don't know. I whispered, "Won't you feel awkward every time you come back to Lemis after you've been with me?"

He was silent.

"Mosa, I have come to accept the fact that my whole being belongs to you, but you have never been fully mine. I spoke quietly, and said in a trance, "I share a lover with someone else, and Lemise shares a husband with someone else." What does it feel like to be caught in the middle? I don't understand. ”

He froze, his breathing becoming sluggish. Hesitation and hesitation, struggle and struggle, and then, almost suddenly, he grabbed my hand and placed it in the place of his heart.

"Do you really want to know?" the tenderness dissolved instantly, and he stared straight at me with that frightened and dejected gaze.

"Every day, every time I pray......" he choked up, forcing himself to hold back and try to keep his composure, "and every time I prostrate, the guilt and self-blame go deeper. I kept asking Allah for forgiveness from Allah, but every time I finished my confession, I couldn't help but continue to sin...... "He bowed his head on my 'naked' and 'exposed' shoulders, and his skin was warmly wet, and the wind blew, which cooled quickly, and was immediately stained with new warmth," Allah forgive only those who have done evil in ignorance and have repented soon." But you are the poison I have committed again and again, enough to push my whole life into hell, so that I can only keep repenting, but I can't get rid of it. ”

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Singh waved his hand: "I can't say that, in fact, at that time, although I was advising you, I faintly hoped that you and Mosa could succeed, which can be regarded as a regret in my heart." ”

A bitter smile appeared on my lips, my eyes dimmed, and I lowered my head and used bangs to hide the loss and self-deprecation in my eyes: "But still, it has become a regret." ”

Singh reached out and patted me on the shoulder, trying to soothe me, but accidentally caught a glimpse of the necklace around my neck and asked curiously, "What is this string?"

I hesitated, didn't think it mattered, and took the necklace out of my collar, revealing the shiny ring.

"This ring 'spent' a lot of money. He said casually.

I 'licked' and 'licked' my lips, but I didn't answer: "You are a man, how can you understand this." ”

"Indians, both men and women, like to wear jewelry, why don't I understand?" he replied with interest, "Do you know what it means to have a ring on the necklace?"

I just thought it was a commemoration, and I didn't think too much about it, so I asked him in a daze, "What does it represent?"

There are two meanings, one is to represent the lost love, this ring will never be worn on the hand, but can not be forgotten, and the other is the love of waiting, when you find your other half, give him the ring on the necklace, and the two will love each other for a lifetime. ”

Lost love, waiting love.

My heart pounded, and I wondered if Moses had ever thought about it when he sent me? Am I his loss, or is he waiting? Or is he wishing me to find the other half of my love soon?

Ten fingers twisted and twisted, and I could restrain myself from seeing Moses again, but I could not seem to restrain the thoughts that germinated. After a while, I took a deep breath, shook my head secretly, and responded casually: "It's just that I'm just playing around casually, and I've never thought about it so much." ”

Hearing this, Singh laughed twice, looked down at the shape of the rock in the microscope, and regained his concentration again.

A week after the start of the school year, the school outings began to be registered, and the venue was in Ain.

Al Ain is the largest oasis in the UAE, belonging to Abu Dhabi and just over a hundred kilometers away from Dubai. Unlike other emirates where the desert stretches out, Al Ain is surrounded by green trees and springs, making it the most natural shade of green in the desert.

Almost all the Chinese students in my grade quickly registered, but I kept dragging my feet and didn't express my position.

Lian Pian's eyes widened, and he was a little surprised: "Xixi, you won't go, right? for a whole week, if you don't go, how boring it will be to be bored at school." ”

I soothed her surprise and said, "It's not that I'm not going, but I want to wait until the end to sign up." I had to make sure there wasn't anyone I didn't want to see on the outing......"

Lian Pian looked at the ring around my neck and sighed.

"Xixi, why are you so stupid......"

Reason is as relieved as hers, and the advice given is to remove the necklace, and it is also free from sadness.

I shook my head, weakly refused, and convinced myself, "It's just a necklace, a goodbye commemoration, a good etiquette to get together and disperse." In the end, it's just an accessory. ”

She looked at me steadily, a look of pity and pity. After a while, the look crossed me and looked behind me, with a look of surprise.

"What's wrong?" I followed her gaze and looked back, only to see Mosa and Jia Yi walking out of the library side by side, talking and laughing.

"What's going on? It's noon, so I won't be so diligent in self-study. Lian Pian asked me.

I shrugged, puzzled: "I don't know, maybe it's a group discussion, there is just one person missing, and there are only two of them." ”

Lian Pian suddenly 'revealed' a sympathetic expression: "It's just the beginning of school, and your teacher has assigned the topic?"

I thought about it, and it was true that there wasn't any homework or material to discuss lately, so what were they doing? As far as I know, Moussa was not an academic material.

As soon as he finished speaking, he saw Jia Yi and Mousa say goodbye separately, and the two of them walked in opposite directions. And Jia Yi was walking towards me and Lian Pian.

"Hi. Jia Yi was obviously in high spirits and quite happy, "What are you two doing here?"

"I happened to pass by, and I caught a glimpse of you. Lian Pian pouted, Jia Yi has been lukewarm to her recently, and there is no deliberate pursuit, and the relationship is much more natural than before. Lian Pian no longer deliberately avoided him, but calmly faced each other, less of the panic he had before.

I was filled with curiosity to ask him what he had done with Moses, but I pursed my lips and felt that I should not ask again, lest I have any more waves.

I was hesitating, and Lian Pian asked straight for me: "You and that white robe, studying in the library at noon?"

Jia Yi laughed heartily: "Yes, love to learn." ”

"I don't believe it. Lian Pian raised his hand, "In the past, when Xixi and the white robes were in a group, I saw it in my eyes, and I never discussed, how could I sacrifice my time at noon to study? ”

"I don't lie to you, I'm really going to learn. Jia Yi raised his eyebrows and showed off a little proudly: "It's just that there was no discussion, but I unilaterally tutored him." Of course, this reward is also very high!"

I finally couldn't help the sleepiness in my heart, and still asked: "Is he working so hard now?"

Jia Yi waved his hand: "It's not a professional class, and he doesn't know which tendon is 'messy', but he wants to learn Chinese, and he doesn't let me tell others." He laughed and said, "But tell you you you should be fine." His purpose in secrecy is certainly not against the two of you. ”

I was stunned, my lips pursed into a line, and before I knew it, I fell into the quagmire of longing again. I remembered the meaning of the ring necklace that Singer told me, and I couldn't help but think nonsense.

Is he still trying to try?

If not, how could he devote himself to investigating China's geology, and how could he hide that others were learning Chinese? When I wanted to get away from him step by step, did he still want to get closer to me little by little?

The light in his eyes and the fire in his heart were extinguished in an instant, and they could not fully express this chaotic despair.

I want to love him, but I have no luck, and I want to hate him, but I have no excuses.

I want to hide, but I have no place, and I want to accept it, but I don't have the courage.

Either way, you can't get rid of the stupid 'desire' that you hold deep in your heart.

It's just that this stupid 'desire' moves, can't say, can't say, and dare not say.