In the past few days, I have been looking back to revise my work, and the past is like smoke, and I have once again fallen into a homesick plot and can't extricate myself!

I regret that I have traveled so far, that I am far away from home, away from my parents and relatives, that my youthful ambitions have not been realized, and that I have become a duckweed in this foreign land......

Looking back on my life, the past scenes are like a movie playing, which makes me understand that I have gone through so many years!

The years of complacency are gone, and all the efforts and dedication have been fixed in today's situation. Pen ~ fun ~ pavilion www.biquge.info

Unwilling!

But now the years have long stripped me of my ambition and elegance, and the last time I saw a sentence: one of the characteristics of people who are old is probably that they are not interested in anything......

Think about the old days when you were gluttonous, your eyes glowed green and your saliva flowed when you encountered delicious food, you can think about the days when you were not afraid of trouble and were willing to be tired of being a dog for a momentary interest, and you can think about letting go of all the worldly for love, and being willing to be poor and white and have nothing to accompany the world.....

Now that life is no longer so difficult, it seems that everything is there, and there is no need to worry about life anymore, and I am no longer interested in anything.

I miss the steadiness and security of the days when I had nothing, and I miss the ambition of the time when everything was safe and the future is long......

Looking at the bright sunlight outside, the ventricles were still gloomy.

Where do I go from here for decades to come?

When all ideals are sealed in the vicissitudes of time, and all the good things are gone, when you face the hideousness and unbearable reality, how should you be good?

Speaking of which, it seems that there are still decades to work hard, and the old and weak of life are approaching, and at that time I always thought that there was countless time and strength to realize the dreams in my heart and be happy for a lifetime.

Now, the indomitable soul has to bow its head high to cater to this undreamed situation.

Cry - it's useless!

Fight - the heart is already exhausted and the fighting spirit is gone.

Conform - so unwilling!

If you hadn't wronged yourself at the beginning, you wouldn't have been admitted to a university or major you didn't like, if you hadn't worked hard for love and wouldn't have gone far away, if you hadn't chosen comfort and actively forged ahead, if you ......

And life is a journey with no return, and all the ifs are just ifs......

I often think that many things can be done again, but I wake up from time to time, and I have to face the reality and survive.

Was everything meant to be?

If I can uncover the mysteries of my past and present lives, make me understand that the circumstances of this life are my karma for many lifetimes, and let me know all the debts I have to bear and need to pay off, I am willing to devote my life to clearing zero, and in the next life, I just want stability.