Chapter 103: Let's Go
He's a personal doctor now, so he's coming to see me as a friend.
And he was wearing a white shirt, and when he came to my room without much noise, he knocked on the door three times, and after I shouted in, he sat down on the stool next to my bed.
"At the hospital, they also invited me, a personal doctor, to come over, so that the medical staff could see it, and they thought they were not taking good care of it. Dr. Lu smiled and shook his head.
He and I are old friends, so I don't need to say much polite words, I asked him straight to the point: "How are you doing?"
Doctor Lu nodded: "It's okay, it's not difficult to eat in S City." ”
When he said this, I couldn't help but feel a little guilty in my heart, because I had some inexplicable entanglements with him back then, so Su Yunan directly got rid of his work irrationally, to be honest, this Doctor Lu is a good person, so much so that I feel guilty about him now.
If it weren't for the big deal, I really didn't want to trouble him.
Seeing that my face was a little bad, Dr. Lu raised his eyebrows, as if he was teasing me, and said, "Why, that possessive man in your family is not by your side today?"
I chuckled, "Don't make fun of me." ”
Some reports on the TV about the Deng family and the Su family have gone to heaven, and Dr. Lu must have known that Su Yunan and I are not ordinary 'husband and wife'.
But presumably he also sees through it.
Dr. Lu lowered his head and laughed a few times, and turned his gaze to the TV that was still playing, his gaze complicated.
I whispered, "Look at him, he died of his wife, and he may not know how relieved he is, but he is playing a five-good husband on the screen, which is really disgusting." ”
Dr. Lu said: "It may be sincere grief. ”
I sneered: "No, he has no intention, otherwise how could he cheat in marriage again and again?"
This kind of topic is a bit sensitive, but I subconsciously blurted it out, and after saying it, I felt that it seemed a little inappropriate, and I was embarrassed to say the wrong thing, so I could only snap and turn off the TV, and then coughed twice.
I came back to my senses, put my hand in front of him, and asked him, "Dr. Lu, can you help me take the pulse?" ”
Dr. Lu's thoughts were pulled back, and he didn't continue the topic just now, but he was obviously puzzled by my move, "What's the matter?
I said, "If you feel unwell and find a hospital, you can solve it, but this discomfort may not be diagnosed by this hospital, so you can try it." ”
Maybe it was because I talked too much and Dr. Lu didn't understand it too much, so he didn't say much, but put his hand on my pulse.
In fact, there are very few such methods of diagnosis and treatment, which seems a bit primitive, but I think it is the most effective.
After his diagnosis, he frowned lightly and said, "It's not a big deal, and your pulse is not disordered, are you not feeling well?"
I nodded, and a slight smile curled up on my lips: "That's right, they say I'm pregnant, is that true or false?"
After hearing what I said, Dr. Lu's expression changed, and he asked, "That must be a diagnosis error." ”
"Did you diagnose it wrong?" I looked at him amusedly.
Dr. Lu's expression froze, as if he felt that this matter was not simple, so he used his index and middle fingers to place on my pulse for a long time, and the warmth was transmitted directly to my wrist.
The air was so frightening that I knew it in my heart, but I still wanted to hear the healer tell me about it.
After about two minutes, he put his hand down again and said, "I'm sure I don't have a happy pulse, I have been practicing medicine for so many years, although I can't say how exquisite my medical skills are, but this point will not be wrong." ”
I nodded and said to Dr. Lu, "Thank you, please make a trip for such a trivial matter." ”
Dr. Lu was obviously puzzled, this conversation sounded strange, and he couldn't help but ask, "You're welcome." ”
I remembered my reaction before the accident and asked, "How do I explain that if I'm retching, my lower abdomen is uncomfortable, and I like to eat sour and spicy food?"
Dr. Lu smiled: "Not all retching is a precursor to pregnancy, you may have an upset stomach, a cold body, or a change of season, a change of environment, resulting in physical discomfort and causing you to have those behaviors." ”
My heart slowly began to chill, remembering that I had those reactions for the first time at home, when I named the baby with Su Yunan, and compared it to now, it seemed so funny.
At that time, I didn't come to the hospital for examination, and I was distracted by Bai Jing halfway through, and then I directly forgot about the physical examination, if I had gone to the hospital at that time, I would not have been deceived by Su Yunan for so long.
Later, after chatting with Dr. Lu for a long time, I sent him out of the hospital room, and I slipped and fell on the floor weakly.
But his plan is really bad enough, because by three or four months, sooner or later it will be exposed.
It's ridiculous to say, did he fool me like a fool?
yes, I was like a fool with him, I didn't even have a test sheet, I had a car accident, how could I believe that man's nonsense.
But if I had begged to be cautious, I would not have been teased by him for so long.
Why did he lie to me that I was pregnant, when he didn't have any children? Give me hope and drive me into despair?
This man just likes to laugh at me in such a way, me?
……
He lied to me so many times that when I think about these things occasionally, I even feel like I'm immune, but my heart is colder and more thorough.
Sure enough, my body still can't conceive for a long time.
When I think of this, my heart is still astringent, like being pressed into a pool of bitter water, and I can't get out no matter how hard I struggle.
When he came back to the hospital, it was evening, and I was playing with the knife in the drawer, and the bandages on my arms were ripped off by me, and I didn't care if the blood was oozing out.
Su Yunan came in and saw such a scene, his face was a little bad, he hurriedly swept over, grabbed my arm directly and asked, "What's the matter with you?"
I cried out in pain, and he looked bad, but he methodically pulled out the bandage and alcohol from the cabinet, and then tried to press my arm and help me with the medicine.
I looked at his face and got angry, grabbed the bottle of alcohol, and slammed it to the ground.
The glass bottle shattered and there was a bang, and all the alcohol flowed out, and I then ripped the gauze away and threw it in his face.
His face instantly sank, staring at the broken glass bottle on the ground, and asked me in a cold voice, "What the are you crazy about?"
I picked at my wound and said, "I heard a joke today, if you want it, I'll tell it to you." ”
Su Yunan directly grabbed my hand to stop my self-harm, and said, "I'm not interested." ”
I couldn't break free, so I went with him, but I just laughed a few times and said, "I asked a doctor to come over today and ask him to help me check my body, but guess what he said? Isn't it funny that he actually said that I am not pregnant?
When I said this, I pretended to laugh out loud in surprise, this laugh was unbearable, and he grabbed Su Yunan's hand and trembled, and his face became even heavier.
But after a few seconds, he reacted again, pinched my face and said, "That's just a joke after all?
When I couldn't breathe with my laughter, I finally gradually suppressed my laughter, looked at Su Yunan, he also put away his hand, and wanted to take the knife in my hand, but I got up faster and directly pressed the knife against his throat.
He looked at me, a little puzzled, with a hint of danger in his eyes, staring at the cold tip of the knife, and asked me, "What are you doing here?"
My hand holding the knife trembled a little, but I pretended to be calm and said: "Now I ask you a question, you can answer, and if there is any truth in the words, I will ......"
"You're going to cut my throat with this knife?"
He took it for me, raising an eyebrow and looking at me as if he were looking at a clown.
My palms were already sweating on the hilt of the knife, and I felt a little embarrassed, but he spoke more smoothly than I did, even though it was me.
But I still calmed down and said word by word: "Yes." ”
As soon as I finished speaking, he burst out laughing, as if mockingly.
The smile on the corner of my mouth disappeared, and when I heard him laugh louder than the other, I was furious in my heart, and the knife against his throat deepened: "What are you laughing at! Do you think I really don't dare? It's not like I haven't stabbed you, so I don't want to die, so I can stop laughing!"
I was extremely corrupt, and I said it was a threat rather than a clown jumping off the beam.
But Su Yunan actually put away his laughter, and a hint of banter crossed his eyes: "Okay, if you ask, I will definitely know everything." ”
Seeing that he was not afraid at all, I even wanted to break his face now, but after weighing the pros and cons, I endured it.
I asked, "Did you kill Deng Qing?"
He chuckled, as if he had heard something funny, and the knife I had cut his throat tightened again, and I said, "Answer me!"
He said, "No." ”
I asked, "Really, not?"
He said: "No matter how many times you ask, I have only one answer, she is a suicide." ”
I said, "......."
"Okay, then let me ask you, why am I not pregnant, but you want to lie to me, what kind of heart do you have?"
He was silent for a while before he said, "I won't let you go." ”
Me: "......"
I looked at him, he completely suppressed his smile, and even changed to a slightly serious look, I thought he was going to say something, but his next step was to touch my hand holding the handle of the knife, and I shuddered, and almost fell off the bed.
He looked at me, looked at me, and this time changed it to one by one: "I don't want you to go, so that you think that if you have a child, you will be temporarily separated." ”
He added one more word, but the latter was deeper than the first, and even he grabbed my hand and grasped the hilt of the knife, and went a little deeper into his neck.
"I answered all according to my heart, are you satisfied with this answer?"
The tips of my fingers trembled, and I didn't even dare to look at his fiery eyes.
I can only change the topic and ask: "When are you going to sign a contract abroad?"
He said, "Tomorrow." ”
I laughed again and said, "How many days?"
"It's not certain yet," he said. ”
I asked, "Can I go with you?"
He said, "You didn't get a passport, trouble." ”
Me: "......"
He added: "Wait for me at home." ”
I said, "You lied to me again, do you know how much I look forward to the child? Do you know how much it hurts me to make such a joke so that I don't leave you?"
He chuckled: "After going around for a long time, I came back again." ”
I looked at his breezy appearance, and my heart was even more heartbroken, he couldn't understand my pain, he would never understand.
I said, "I hate you and cheat on my feelings." ”
He smiled and asked, "Really?"
Then he took my hand and went deeper into his neck.
When I saw a trace of blood on his neck, my hand trembled even more, and I subconsciously let go of the hilt.
But at this moment, he grabbed the handle of the knife with his backhand faster, pressed me back to the bed heavily, slashed my face with the cold blade of the knife, and then stroked my face with the other hand, and said, "You're done asking questions, it's my turn." ”
My heartbeat suddenly became faster, and he suddenly took the initiative, and I didn't even react to what was going on, he just looked at me and didn't say anything, my teeth trembled a little, and I half-pushed him and said, "What do you want to ask?"
His eyes suddenly flashed with a hint of hurt emotion, I didn't know what was wrong with him, and before he could react, he asked me, "Do you still want to leave now?"
This sentence directly made me a little confused.
He would never ask me that, and again and again he would just lock me up, threaten me, and keep me from leaving.
I've never followed my advice like this.
But I didn't let my guard down because of his words, maybe it was a new trick on his part, and I sneered: "Yes, I don't want to leave all the time, staying by your side has always made me sick." ”
"What other tricks do you have? I'm not pregnant now anyway, and you're going to England to sign a contract, so no matter how long you are, you can't control me, right? I always have a way to escape! Are you sure you want to spend your life like this with me?"
I raised my eyebrows, even more proud, I knew that I couldn't escape from his palm anyway, so I might as well be angry with him.
His face was surprisingly calm, but in the next second, his hand twisted around my neck, making my pupils widen and my breathing suddenly became difficult to breathe.
"I haven't done anything to you in a long time, have I? You don't like me like this, do you?" He strained his hands, and his expression even had a hint of hideous cruelty, and I panicked all of a sudden, and beat his hand hard, at a loss.
"But do you think I really won't touch you? I spoil you, just because you can always challenge my bottom line! I'll let you taste it today, the last thing you want to think about in the past!"
As soon as he finished speaking, he threw the knife away, and the next second he began to tear at my clothes, and I immediately realized what he was going to do, and screamed and beat him hard, but no matter what he did, he was like a mad lion, and he could not stop.
My clothes were quickly removed, he pinched my waist, and said with a smile: "Originally, if you didn't expose the fact that you were not pregnant, if you accompanied me to pretend to be stupid, I couldn't move you, but now that you have broken it, it is giving me a great opportunity, don't you say?"
I shook my head desperately, trying to refute something, but he covered my lips, so that I couldn't breathe out a single breath, and whispered: "Good, my Xiao An, you don't have to say anything, you just have to bear it with peace of mind." ”
I am like a prisoner waiting on the edge of a knife to be beaten by him, and like a hostage who is in the hands of a black-hearted gangster and can never escape.
The next second, there was a sharp pain in my body, I hadn't tasted such a hellish feeling in a long time, but it was still the same discomfort, the same pain.
Even, I haven't been like this for a long time, and if I try again, I'm like a fledgling girl, I don't understand anything, and I rely on him to guide me.
……
I've never felt pleasure in a relationship.
In terms of partners, there is no sense of equality.
I don't feel the happiness of girls my age, and couples are a ridiculous, cold term for me.
……
On the white sheets, I looked at him blankly, put on all my clothes, and then bandaged the blood that had just come out violently for me, and said, "The wound can't be wet again these days." ”
I closed my eyes and ignored the tear that flowed down my stream.
He patted my face and whispered in my ear: "You go, you can go to any country, I will ask the assistant to help you get your passport and air ticket, and we won't meet again after that." ”
As if stimulated, I opened my eyes again.
He was still saying these words lightly, and even unhurriedly arranging his tie in front of the mirror.
I thought I had misheard, and asked again in a hoarse voice, "What did you say?"
When he finished tying his tie, he looked at me unhurriedly and said, "Literally, do you need to repeat it again?"
He regained his composure, and the lightness in his eyes seemed to tell me that the fierce affair that had just happened here was all my dream.
I couldn't speak, my voice was hoarse, and I couldn't open my mouth for a long time when I wanted him to confirm what he said.
He rubbed his eyebrows, took out a mobile phone from his trouser pocket, put it on the table, and said, "I have a new mobile phone for you, and I will use it in the new city in the future." ”
I stared at him blankly, thinking it was still a dream, but the tingling in my body reminded me that I was going through these things firsthand.
What I had fantasized about for a long time came true at this moment......
He actually took the initiative to let me go.
But my heart is not as relaxed as I imagined, but there are some complicated things in my heart, I don't know if it is real relief or new doom.
Finally propped up his waist, looked at the brand-new mobile phone on the desktop, took it in his hand, looked at Su Yunan, and smiled bitterly: "You came prepared today, right?"
He snorted, but didn't retort.
Suddenly, I noticed that the way he looked at me seemed to have become much stranger, and I grabbed the sheets tightly, and before he was about to step out of the ward, he said, "I'm going to Sichuan." ”
He stopped his steps, tilted his head slightly, and replied to me without any warmth: "You can go to the moon." ”
……
I went home that day, Xiao Rong walked behind me, didn't say a word, and we were both the same silence.
When I got home, I began to pack my clothes and personal belongings without saying a word, without explaining to Xiaorong, she witnessed the strange silence of me and Su Yunan, and didn't dare to say a word.
The servants all looked at each other, Su Yunan just sat in the hall on the first floor, drinking a cup of tea unhurriedly, and let me send the servants to pack my luggage for me.
Assistant Li stood beside him, looking in my direction uneasily.
I could even hear Assistant Li asking Su Yunan.
Assistant Li asked, "Do you really want to send Miss away?"
Su Yunan lit a cigarette, I haven't seen him smoke for a long time, no, to be precise, he hasn't smoked in front of me for a long time.
He took a puff unhurriedly, then put his hand in the ashtray before saying, "Well, now that the matter is over, I can only let it go." ”
Yes, he has deceived me so many times, and I am not pregnant, which is a fatal blow to me, although I have long been suspicious and mentally prepared in this regard, but when the truth comes, it is still so painful.
Assistant Li nodded: "Okay, then I'll ask someone to apply for a passport for her." ”
Su Yunan chuckled: "No need, she's in the country, change cities, Zuo just doesn't want to meet me, besides, her English is not good, and her self-care ability is like that, it's too far away and it's really unnecessary." ”
I was angry when I pulled the zipper, but then I thought that what he said was really not unreasonable.
But I always felt that Assistant Li seemed to be a little smiling: "Yes, I know." ”
The smell of his tobacco came straight from the hall to me, and I could smell it from afar, and it stimulated my senses one by one.
This is his favorite brand, he has been smoking since he was very young, I remember clearly, when his father found out, he was locked up and beaten, but he still did not repent after being beaten to the point that his head was broken and bleeding.
His father couldn't control him, so he had no choice but to give up in the end, but strongly ordered him to pretend to be well-behaved when outsiders came.
This is probably the root of his well-dressed beast.
I cleaned up for about an afternoon, cleared all the things that should have been packed, sat on the edge of the bed and was stunned for a long time, looking at this house, and there was a dull ache in my heart.
There are so many memories left for me in this room.
In the evening, he knocked on my door, and I opened it for him, standing in front of him without a trace of defense.
He said, "Change your clothes and come down and walk with me." ”
When I stood still, he smiled and said, "It's the last time we broke up, okay? ”
He walked first to the courtyard, and I thought for a few seconds and smiled indifferently.
Then I just put on a coat and followed, for me, even if it was a ceremony to break up with him, it didn't need to be grand.
Our beginning was an accident, and the end was better than silent.
We kept a distance of one meter from each other, and walked the courtyard of the Su Mansion over and over again, walking very slowly.
It's so slow that I think this yard can't be finished at all.
As far as I can remember, it was the first time I had walked with him so patiently.
The courtyard of the Su House, I remember that it was incomparably large in my memory when I was a child, and now I look at it is just like that, probably because people have grown up and their mood is different.
"Do you remember that you always like to pull the flowers and plants in this yard, put them in a vase, and say that you want to take them home and raise them?" Su Yunan suddenly spoke, taking the lead in breaking the silence.
He pointed to some of the wildflowers and weeds in the yard, and a smile appeared on his lips.
Like to have an old dream with you, please collect: () has been with your old dream update speed is the fastest.