My family, five brothers and sisters.

When I went to university, I relied on outsiders to help me get through the tuition and living expenses.

It has nothing to do with the state, and I have not applied for any money such as student loans from the state.

After graduating, the first thing I did was to send my sister to school, from high school to university and study abroad.

Then, help the family pay off the debt.

I have an uneasy father, and the prototype of the protagonist father in the previous book is my father.

After sending my sister to school and helping the family pay off their debts.

Okay, it's time for my brother to get married, in his thirties.

But with no house, no car, no money, no girlfriend, just 10,000 yuan of savings, how to find a girlfriend, how to find a wife.

What to do?

Find me!

How do I do that?

The wish of my parents, not for my brother, but also for my parents, all kindness and filial piety come first.

Anyway, my girlfriend has run away, and I'm already alone, so it's okay, so let's buy a house for my brother, and I took out all my savings.

Mom and Dad said it's okay, when you buy a house and get married in the future, your sister will help you, your brother will help you, and our two elders will also help you.

Then, my sister got a boyfriend after graduation and brought it home from abroad to meet my parents, passing by me who was still working in Guangzhou at the time. After seeing the parents, they left again.

But I didn't even know, didn't tell me, didn't come to see me.

As for my brother, when he gave birth, he still needed to ask me for money to go to the hospital.

After the birth of a child, there are expenses again.

After buying him a house, I can't remember how much money I paid again.

Every year, my family asks me to save money to buy a house and get married.

And then every year, they ask me for money to fill in this and that.

When I was unemployed, the company was dissolved, and my boss was nowhere to be found, I didn't dare to tell my parents: I had no job, I was asking for a salary, and I couldn't get it back.

I always say I'm at work and everything is fine.

However, in the meantime, my eldest sister called.

Your nephew is no longer in school at the age of seventeen, it's time to buy him a house, otherwise it will be difficult to find a girlfriend in the future, and it will be even more difficult to get married, borrow some money, and we will help you when you buy a house.

I said yes, and I agreed.

Then I called my parents, saved the money you had, and took it out to my eldest sister, I gave it all, and the fare for the New Year home was gone.

Mom and Dad said, we've lent it to your eldest sister.

Nani?

You didn't ask me and decided for me?

Okay, a man promises a thousand dollars, and he promises the eldest sister's things, and he has to do it, can't I take all the money I have saved?

Before hanging up the phone, they also comforted me, it's okay, when you buy a house and get married, they will help you, and we will also help you.

I couldn't help but say in despair: It's okay, as long as you are doing well, I'm fine.

What I couldn't help but say was that I was already wasted, and this life was like this, maybe one day I couldn't survive it, and people would go.

I have been cheated by classmates, deceived by my girlfriend, and even abducted and stolen by strangers.

Why is there an ice cream stalk, because once in the hot summer, I stood in front of the freezer, trying to eat an ice cream, but ended up empty-handed.

It's not that you can't afford it, it's that you can't afford it.

Is my life a failure?

Am I tired of living?

Since I was a child, I have brushed shoulders with death several times, but I have never died.

Living in such pain, and then pretending to be happy to the people around you, to the people who see my words, happy.

Because, in my heart, I still want to live.

Longing for love, longing for family, longing for not becoming a lonely ghost after death.

In my memory, people who have no family and no children will go to see the Qingming Festival after death.

The grave was unswept, and the grave was lonely and lonely as the years slowly smoothed out and disappeared. From the beginning to the end, no one will look at it.

No one is going to see a lonely ghost.

I'm so lonely in life, I don't want to be a lonely ghost after I die.

Even if you can't go to the heavenly palace and can't be reincarnated, you don't want to be lonely forever and wander night after night.

So, I'm going to keep trying to live!