Chapter 285: The Parting Letter

1.

The next day, the sun rose and spring before I got out of bed.

Rubbing his temples with a splitting headache, Spring slowly recalled the experience of fighting with Sun Xiaofei last night, and couldn't tell what it was like in his heart. What was the purpose of the two of them drinking so desperately last night? to hide their emotional confusion? Or was it a vent after emotional frustration? Or was it a kind of nostalgia in the subconscious of the other party who was about to lose? Spring couldn't figure it out.

In the spring, he went down to the ground with his slippers, opened the doors and windows to ventilate, and released the smoke and alcohol that filled the house.

According to the school plan, an all-teacher meeting will be held at half past nine in the morning. Seeing that it was still early, Spring lazily went back to bed.

After lighting a cigarette and smoking less than two puffs, Wu Xiao suddenly broke into the dormitory.

"Give, Sun Xiaofei wrote to you..." Wu Xiao said and casually threw a tightly sealed envelope that looked heavy onto the bedside table in the spring.

"What do you mean by writing it to me?" said Spring, confused, turning over and sitting up.

"How do I know about the matter between the two of you?" Wu Xiaobai glanced at Chunchun, and his tone brought out a little dissatisfaction, "Wang Li said that Sun Xiaofei slept until midnight last night and got up to vomit wine, and after vomiting wine, she lay on the bedside table and wrote a letter to you, crying while writing, so that Wang Li didn't sleep all night. Alas, isn't it a fatal thing for a girl to drink so much beer?

"Get out, what kind of infatuated woman is a negative man?" Spring yelled at Wu Xiao, "Do you still have a serious word in your kid's mouth?"

"Hehe, then I'll tell you seriously," Wu Xiao turned his head to stare at the spring, and said seriously, "Just now Sun Xiaofei's boyfriend drove to pick her up, this young man is Sun Xiaofei's junior high school classmate, and he is the secretary of the 'number one' in the Lushui Town Party Committee." Don't say it, the young man is personable and talented, and he has been chasing Sun Xiaofei for some days, but unfortunately Sun Xiaofei has always looked down on him. Alas, this is really 'grass in your own hands, treasure in the eyes of others', what you don't want, maybe many people rush to get it, love is really unpredictable..."

"Roll the calf, don't pretend to be a love expert here, you haven't achieved the right result yourself, so you're here to point fingers!" Wu Xiao frowned and pretended to be deep, making Spring cry and laugh.

"Get out, get out!" Wu Xiao grimaced at the spring, "Sun Xiaofei made a mess of the house after moving, and I still have to help my Lily clean up, I don't have time to grind my teeth with you here, hehe!"

"Get out, Sun Xiaofei is just as you wish when she leaves, you can live a young husband and wife life with Wang Li with peace of mind..." Spring shouted at Wu Xiao's back with a wicked smile.

Sent Wu Xiao away, and Spring set his eyes on the letter on the bedside table.

2.

After pondering for a long time, Spring opened the envelope with a mixed feeling.

The letter paper is a sticky note from Toyama Middle School, and the letter is written with a blue ballpoint pen, the handwriting is sloppy, the size is different, and there are many modifications and smudges, it can be seen that the writer's mood at that time was very unstable, there are spots of water stains on the letterhead, and some have been soaked in the handwriting, which may be the tears of Sun Xiaofei that Wu Xiao said.

Spring let out a long sigh and unfolded the letter and read it from the beginning.

Although Sun Xiaofei wrote the letter hastily and looked a little disorganized, she still read the letter in the spring with her skills in studying calligraphy on weekdays.

The letter is written as follows: (basically reproduced in the original format below)

Xiaotian:

Please forgive me for calling you so affectionately, this is the first time, and it should be the last, although I have called you this countless times in my sleep! I have also called you silently in the bottom of my heart in countless lonely nights!

I am a girl full of longing and thirst for love, and I have always dreamed of having a vigorous, earth-shattering relationship to accompany my flower-like youth. At the same time, I am a woman who is demanding about love, every woman wants her boyfriend to be a personable prince charming, and I am no exception, although since I was a child, there is no shortage of men around me who pursue me, but, before you, I really have not met a man who makes my heart move. Until the graduation assignment in the summer of 1993, I met you for the first time in the Education Commission Office, I never believed in love at first sight, but this time, I believed.

I believe that my vision will not be wrong, and sure enough, in a short period of time, your efforts and diligence, your sincerity and kindness, your achievements and the charm you have shown, once again let the people around you know a new you, and once again touched my heart.

So, my young, hopeful heart full of love often waits in a longing for anticipation. Waiting for your attention, waiting for your favor, waiting for your caresse...

However, you are like a kite that cannot be caught, I can only look up to you soaring in the sky, but I cannot grasp the thread that can pull you. As a result, I can only live in the constant entanglement and entanglement of hopes and disappointments...

After the New Year in 1995, the opportunity finally came, I didn't expect that I would become a "soldier" under you, you don't know, when Zhao Zhiqiang told me the news, I was excited and stayed up all night. I know that from now on, I can stay with you justifiably, I can watch you smile, I can feel your warm breath, I can fight side by side with you...

I can't forget our perfect performance and tacit cooperation at the New Year's Day party in '95; I can't forget the joy of completing the task hand in hand when we sweep the tomb on Yuntai Mountain on the Qingming Festival in April '95; I can't forget your childlike cute smiling face when the school newspaper was launched after many days of hard work; I can't forget it... Can't forget... Too much to forget...

Xiaotian, you don't know, how much I want to be with you all the time, even if there is no communication, no words, as long as I can feel your existence, it is a kind of happiness for me.

But you never seem to have looked at me squarely, am I not good enough? Or am I not good enough? Or do you already have another woman in your heart? I want to know what you really think, but your indifference to rejection of people from thousands of miles away makes me afraid to inquire.

In April this year, there was news on campus that you were dating Xu Dan, you don't know, the heart-rending pain I felt when I heard the news. Later, I secretly went to Xu Dan's shop to see her, Xu Dan is indeed a good girl, but I am confident that I am more beautiful than her, more knowledgeable than her, I don't believe that you will choose a rural girl with only a beginner Chinese as your lover. So, my restless heart was ready to move again, and I decided to continue to wait, waiting for you to find me who has always loved you affectionately, waiting for you to make the last choice in life...

Xiaotian, you don't know, in those days, I lived in pain every day, endured the rumors and rumors of you and Xu Dan, and suppressed my desire to take the initiative to get close to you.

I am a lively and cheerful girl, but in terms of love for you, I don't have the courage to take the initiative to pursue it, because I have done the most wrong thing in my life. Like most young girls at that time, I chose to commit myself to my college counselor for the sake of materiality, for the sake of prestige, for the sake of that poor face. As the saying goes, "one misstep becomes a thousand years of hatred", I really hate myself, hate my youth and ignorance, hate my love for vanity, hate my easy pay... You don't know, just that once, my body is already broken, and I can't leave my best things to the people I love the most, this is the most eternal pain in my life!

In front of you who are so perfect, I am broken, not only in body, but also in mind! I really don't have the courage to pursue you, and I don't know what kind of attitude to face you... If one day, you know the truth of this matter... I don't know, I'm really scared... There can be no deception in love, deceive you, deceive myself, I can't do it!

This summer, I struggled with a whole vacation, I even made two sets of action plans for myself, and I had already written a courtship letter to confess to you, in which I honestly revealed everything about myself, I want to give you the right to choose, whether you want me or not, I will not regret it! However, fate is such a trick on people, I heard the news of your marriage on the first day of school, this is a bolt from the blue for me, this thunderbolt blew me up, and also blew me up, I know, I should leave···

Xiaotian, I'm leaving, I'm really leaving, maybe, in this life, I will never see each other again!

People are gone, but the heart is left here, in Hushan Town, in Hushan Middle School, and by your side...

People are gone, but love doesn't leave!

My love will always be with you!

Xiaotian, I wish you happiness!

Forever!

Xiao Fei

On the night of August 27, 1996

Holding a few thin pieces of stationery in his hand, after reading it, spring was already in tears.