After school on Thursday afternoon, Wang He returned to his dormitory, packed his things, and went home in the back seat of his father's bicycle.

Saturday is the wedding day, so why did Wang Xiangyu return two days earlier? This is because on Friday, the groom's side will send someone to do the work of picking up the bride in advance.

The process of getting married by the Hakka people is complicated, and most rural couples in this era are not free to love, but are introduced through matchmakers.

After the matchmaker ran errands between the two families, it was the first step to "peek", and the two parties met after agreeing on a time and place.

Of course, this meeting was not met by two young people alone, but each accompanied by relatives and elders. Pouring tea and the like, women are often more shy, some come to the scene to show off or sit for a while and leave, and some may not be at the scene, may be secretly watching the boy outside, some shy boys often don't know that the girl has seen themselves, and when they ask about the girl, they may have left, this situation is relatively rare, after all, the boy has not seen the girl, and this family business can not go smoothly.

After the man and woman have met, if there is no objection from both parties, then the second step can be carried out to "say goodbye". The man prepares the gift and asks the matchmaker to come forward and go to the woman's house with the gift to say goodbye. If the woman's family does not object, the gift is accepted, and if she is not satisfied, the gift is not accepted. If you accept the gift at this step, and later regret it, the woman will return all the gifts.

If the pro-family goes well, the third step is to agree on the date and place, and the man and the elders invite the woman and the elders to be present, which is called "looking down", and the two parties preliminarily agree on the dowry, material and other matters. At this step, the girl may not be present, or the boy or girl will not be present, because it is a very real problem to agree on the bride price, and it is best for the two people who are married not to participate directly, so as not to embarrass the girl to her father-in-law and mother-in-law when she marries and visits relatives with her in-laws and boys after marriage.

The biggest problem with underestimating this step is the gift money, if the negotiation is not proper, the woman can only return the gift received before when she goes back. Before this step, it mainly depends on the work of the matchmaker, and the experienced matchmaker will discuss this sensitive topic with both parties when making an introduction at the beginning.

If it goes well, the next step is to "look big". The man agrees on the date, prepares the banquet and transports it to the woman's house, and feasts the woman's relatives and friends. After the feast, the man will give the bride price to the woman's parents.

After reading it, it is "sending the day". After the man chooses the date of the marriage, let the matchmaker or the man go to the woman's house with the rooster, pork, fish, etc., and inform the woman of the set date. Generally, if there is no accident, the woman will agree to this date. Because before that, the girl's birthday will be given to the man, and the man needs to find a fortune teller to choose the date of the marriage, and put the birth date of the man and woman together to calculate, and only after calculating can he choose a good day. This is called a combination of eight characters.

As the old saying goes, it is sometimes said that two people do not get along, and it is generally unlikely, unless you have never met before marriage, or you have found an unreliable fortune teller.

It is the practice of the older generation, and many people in later generations have gradually omitted this step.

After sending off the good day, the next step is to "return to the door".

The day before the woman's marriage is called "to the sedan chair", the man will send more than ten people to the woman's house to pick up the bride under the leadership of the matchmaker, and in the old age to carry the sedan chair for the bride to ride, so it is called "to the sedan chair".

The man went to the drummer band, some set off firecrackers and burned incense, some carried the sedan chair, some carried the burden, the burden was loaded with poultry, wine, meat, cakes, candles, cigarettes, etc., and there was also a woman called "Negative Phoenix Ruren", who was responsible for carrying the bride's clothes over, and the next day the bride went out of the house, and she was also responsible for leading her back to the man's house.

The man usually does not come to the groom, and one of the people sent is a plenipotentiary, such as the person who sets off firecrackers, and this person is called "Xie Langtou". Xie Langtou and the people who were negative were not appointed casually, but could only be elected if they met some conditions. Xie Langtou should prepare at least a dozen red envelopes in advance and give red envelopes to the women in all aspects of the connection.

After the person who picks up the relatives arrives at the woman's house, they first drink tea and eat snacks, which are generally steamed eggs, boiled meatballs, etc. When the woman's family receives the wine, meat and other things sent by the man, they will send red envelopes to the person who bears the burden to express their gratitude, and then take these things to the ancestral tablet in the ancestral hall to worship and explain the reason.

At noon, the woman's house held a banquet to entertain relatives and friends.

In the afternoon, the people who picked up the relatives left Xie Langtou, the Yingfeng Ru and the band, and the rest of the people went home with the heavier things in the bride's wedding dress, such as cabinets and the like. At the dinner, the woman's cook, bridal and other people congratulated the man's family, and Xie Langtou would give red envelopes to these people when he received the blessings, which was called "Qiaoli City".

The next day, when the bride gets married, she will have plastic surgery (face twisting).

Twisting facial hair, also called "twisting face" and "opening face", that is, twisting off the hair on the face and cutting the forehead hair and sideburns, is a custom of unmarried women in rural areas before marriage. After the girl twists her face, she is no longer a "yellow-haired girl", so an unmarried young girl must not twist her face.

Like Xie Langtou and the people who have a negative phoenix, the person who twists the girl's face is also particular, and must be a woman with both children and daughters, and this woman must have a harmonious family, abundant food and clothing, and a prosperous person, so that the girl who has been twisted by her face can add wealth and family harmony in the future, and it is taboo to complete this work with widows, mothers, and women with incomplete children or women who are compatible with the girl.

The bride wears a red shirt dress, a red head cover, and in some places will wear an "old" dress inside the new dress, which is called a "soul shirt".

After the bride is dressed, she bids farewell to her parents, brother and sister-in-law in the room, and the elders say blessings to the bride and give them "sedan chair money", which is the bride's private money, so that she will not be difficult to open her mouth after she has just married and reach out to her husband to ask for money.

After saying the words of blessing in the room, the bride was led by her parents to the ancestral hall to burn incense and pay homage to her ancestors, informing her ancestors that there were offspring girls to marry, and asking the ancestors to bless the girl from marrying a good family and having a smooth life.

After these processes are completed, the bride will be led out by the woman's parents or brothers, out of the ancestral hall, the door, and then "on the sedan chair" after handing it over to the negative phoenix people.

"On the sedan chair", the bride has to cry and marry, make a sad and reluctant to leave home, and since then leave the home where she has lived for more than ten or twenty years, away from her parents, brothers and sisters, many brides can not wait for this time and have already cried into tears. If the married husband's family is very close, or he is in free love, he can't feel the pain of leaving home, and he can't cry, and the older generation will regard him as unfilial, and his parents will signal the bride's sister-in-law and sister to come forward, pinch and twist, and you can't help but cry. Some smart brides can't cry, so they will secretly wipe their faces with the ginger they have hidden before or chew the chili pepper raw, so that they can squeeze out tears to show it.