I didn't feel sleepy this morning, which is unusual for me as someone who wakes up at sunset and sleeps at sunrise.

I washed my face and flipped through the calendar, today, it is the second day of the second month of the lunar calendar, and the day when the dragon raises its head.

Look outside, the weather in Chongqing today is surprisingly good, there are white clouds floating in the sky of Lanlan, and the warm sun is shining on the city, put on clothes, and walk outside. Well, it's gloomy and cool today, just like my mood.

There are not many people on the street, walk to a delicatessen stall, buy half a catty of pig's head meat, in the north, on the second day of February, you have to eat this, but also to cut your hair, to show good luck.

Acquaintances saw it, saw that I had bought pig's head meat and came back, and asked me why? Because I rarely eat greasy things, I said that today is the second day of February, the dragon raised its head, and wanted to eat this, and they looked at me with that pitiful eye, and then let out a burst of wild laughter: The dragon looks up, you want to eat the pig's head?!

Alas, the geographical differences are too great to explain, and I eat my own meat, in their eyes that want to laugh at me.

I made a light dish, a little close to my hometown food, and I ate very comfortably. Eating and eating, I suddenly remembered that I didn't buy leeks and came back, February 2nd, I wanted to eat this, and then the hometown food complex that had been suppressed for a long time came up, and I remembered a lot of things that I hadn't eaten for a long time, and what I missed the most was the sauerkraut in the Northeast.

Thinking about sauerkraut, my heart was sour, and I couldn't eat the food on the table anymore.

The best dish in my memory is this sauerkraut, which is the plate of sauerkraut fried by my grandmother, where there is no meat, no oil, and very little MSG, but it is so delicious in my memory, almost no dish can compare with it.

Is that because my grandmother fried it? I asked myself, but I couldn't tell.

I miss my grandma. Not only her fried sauerkraut, but also her kindness and diligence.

My grandmother has been dead for a long time, so long ago that I have forgotten how many years. Her birthday is the second day of February. The dragon raised its head.

I miss my grandma. I miss her fried sauerkraut, not only because of its deliciousness that I can't forget, but also because of the deep affection that my grandmother nurtured me.

My brother and I were raised by my grandmother, and that year my mother was seriously ill and went to the provincial capital of Fengtian to be hospitalized, and my father sent me and my brother to the mountains in the countryside of Benxi, where my grandmother lived in a small village in the mountains where she had to walk more than ten miles to make soy sauce. There, I grew into my teens.

Grandma's life is legendary and poignant.

Grandma married grandpa when she was a teenager, and at that time, grandma's family was a big merchant and landlord in Qingduizi, Zhuanghe, and grandpa was a big official at that time, and I heard grandma say that he was the director of the Harbin Police Department.

Grandma was very beautiful when she was young, but unfortunately her photos were cut by the ignorant me with scissors, grandma held the pile of pieces and cried for a day, that was her beautiful memory, every time I thought of it, I had a deep sense of guilt, but no matter what, it was impossible to make any remedies for the naughtiness of childhood.

Later, when he was liberated, his grandfather was captured and beaten to death, although he didn't do any crimes, it didn't matter.

My mother and uncle became puppies and were beaten everywhere, and my grandmother led them to Benxi in order for my mother and uncle to live a normal life, and hid from the city to the ravine.

Grandma has no culture, she only knows a few numbers, and she doesn't understand too many big truths, she is just doing her best to be a mother's instinct.

In order for her mother and uncle to eat, she married a man she didn't like at all, just because he could support her mother and uncle. Later, because he was always drinking, his mother was afraid, and he resolutely left him, just so that his mother could be happy.

Later, my grandmother married my step-grandfather, who was very poor in his family, but treated my mother and uncle like his own, and my mother and uncle were happy, and my grandmother was happy, of course, therefore, in order to feed these two children, who were getting older and more able to eat day by day, my grandmother and step-grandfather also paid a lot.

At that time, they were all dependent on a piece of land to support their families, so they kept going to the wasteland, just to be able to get more food. The step-grandfather didn't have children, but just changed his mother's surname, which was his successor, and just helped his grandmother raise his mother and uncle wholeheartedly, until they were adults, got married, and lived a happy life.

Later, when my mother fell ill, they began to raise me and my brother again, and the sorghum rice and potatoes that were freshly pulled out of the charcoal fire in my memory contained many kindnesses that I could not repay in my life.

Grandma has only enjoyed a few years of happiness since she walked out of the house, but she has suffered most of her life, for the sake of the child, for the child's child, she has given her life. Later, when we were older, we were able to make money, but our grandmother and step-grandfather left, so we could only keep this love in our hearts and have nowhere to repay it.

I can still remember my grandmother's appearance, full of gray hair, her back is a little hunched because of years of fatigue, she walks very slowly, she has sciatica, in my memory she just took some painkillers, she was reluctant to spend the little money she had on treatment.

In the crematorium, her face was so peaceful, as if she had just fallen asleep, I would never see her again in this life, my grandmother, my tears welled up.

Grandma loves sweets, but she always keeps that little bit of sugar for me and my brother, and grandma likes jewelry, but she took the only souvenir of her first half of her life, a pair of gold bracelets, and sold them for money.

In the summer, she walked more than five miles of mountain roads to buy popsicles for me and my brother, and she never ate a bite, and in the winter, she folded firewood in the ice and snow to burn the kang for me and my brother to keep warm.

Grandma is simple, although that may be due to her lack of culture, she will only use her laughter and crying to express her inner emotions, but it is so real.

I can still remember every holiday, she stood on the top of the hill a few kilometers away from home and watched, waiting for me and my brother to arrive, the cold northeast mountain wind blew her face so pale, her thin body trembled in the wind, but the moment she saw us, she would laugh, smile very happily, that feeling was only understood many years later when I became a father, grandma loved us, loved my whole family, and we loved her.

However, there was no chance to repay her, she was gone, gone forever, and never saw each other again. I miss her.

I will never forget the scene when my grandmother and grandfather went to replenish the seedlings with tears because of my mischievous uprooting of the sorghum seedlings in the production team. I can still see them taking heavy steps, carrying water from a mile away to the sorghum field, watering one seedling after another, sweat and tears flowing on their faces, buying those sorghum seedlings at that time was almost their income for a year.

When I was in middle school, my grandmother moved once, from where I grew up, to my uncle's house in the mountains.

I have been back there a few times, and I can still see the big bluestone under the hawthorn tree that I played with as a child, and I can see the walnut tree in front of my grandmother's house, but I can't see the old house, let alone the people who live there. Standing on the big bluestone, thinking about the past of my childhood, thinking about my grandmother's smiling face, that face is full of the vicissitudes of life.

Grandma lived in my mother's house for 14 years, but at first I was young and ignorant, and then I was busy with my own affairs when I was older, and I rarely could go back to spend a while with her, and when I finally had the ability to do anything for her, she went, forever, she didn't give her grandson a chance to repay her, she wanted her grandson to feel guilty and regretful about her in this life.

Thinking of my grandmother's death, I thought of the man I called my uncle, the selfish man, the man who drove my grandmother out of the house and ignored him, he could buy the first color TV in the town, he could live in the first building in the town, but he couldn't take out a hundred yuan to buy a little bit of something for his mother, who had paid so much for him.

Grandma died in his house, it was my cousin who came to pick up my grandma, said to go back to live for a few days, my honest grandma went happily, thinking that his heartless son had a change of heart and remembered her, but he did not expect to be able to return to her grandson's side, and since then he has left us.

I hate that man, I hate him.

In order not to let others scold him behind his back, he coaxed his grandmother back, but because of his grandmother's inconvenience, he didn't give her food, didn't give her water, and didn't give her a doctor in order to receive gift money, and her mother called to ask, but said that everything was fine, and her grandmother was very happy.

When my cousin told my mother the truth out of guilt, it was too late, and my grandmother hurriedly ate a few oranges in my mother's arms and left, but she didn't let me see her for the last time, so she went forever, forever, forever.

Grandma has a birthday today, but I will never see her again, I will never see her, I can only think of her in a different place thousands of kilometers away from her, sitting here and crying, grandma, I miss you.

I miss my grandma, I miss her so much.

Grandma, if you know something, come and give me a dream, even if I see you there, your grandson will be satisfied.

Grandma, your grandson misses you so much, misses you so much, and wants to see you.

Grandma, I wish you a happy birthday, if people have an afterlife, you will get happiness, because in this life, you have paid too much, too much.

Grandma, happy birthday, your grandson, kowtow to you here.