I watched Xia ride the bike, one hand carrying the breakfast, the other hand holding the handlebar, and then, the hand holding the handlebar touched a strand of hair in his ear, it was blown away by the wind, I watched it on the balcony and was frightened, if I was not careful, I would fall, Xia was still wiping her hair, and the car had been ridden out a long distance like this.

I was still stunned, and Xia rang the doorbell and came in.

"I'll give you the key to my house. I said to Natsu when I opened the door.

"I'm holding the breakfast like this, and I don't have the hand to open it even if I have the key. "Xia always has an excuse, she carries breakfast in both hands, I quickly took it, after Xia entered the door, she opened the refrigerator and ate the ice cream she bought herself last night.

"Eat cold food in the morning, freeze your stomach. I said.

"It's okay, it's too hot outside, it's only half past five, it's so hot, and it won't spontaneously combust for a while." "Xia ate very coolly, didn't eat breakfast, said that he would live on ice cream at noon, so he went to the tutoring class with his schoolbag, taking advantage of the chaos in the morning, sending food, and water back and forth, Xia Hao quietly mixed in.

I sat at home reading a book, and I was always on guard against licking my fingers again, because my fingers had no grease or saliva moisture, and it was really hard to turn the pages open.

I drew until noon, my neck was sore, my muscles and bones were stiff, I took advantage of the lunch break to make up for yesterday's insomnia, the sun and rain outside the window, it was beautiful, maybe there would be a rainbow later, but I didn't care, closed the heavy curtains, and fell asleep.

When I woke up, it was evening, I drove to the bar, it was the rush hour after work, the road was congested, there was a girl riding a bicycle parked on the zebra crossing, when she could pass, she stood up and ridden, her hand left the handlebar, it was really standing up, there was a crowd around, but she rode steadily, shuttling in the crowd, I looked at her and was worried about her, the danger was full of danger, she smiled and rode to me, I kept staring at her handlebar, fascinated, I did this when I was a child, and only teenagers and girls who were made in heaven dared to try like this.

The green light came on in front of me, and I drove to the bar, and just now, I don't know if anyone was sitting in the car, and I longed for it as much as I did.

Xia sat at the door reading a book, I walked over to open the door, Xia was still unconscious, I asked Xia, "Did you fall into the book?"

"Just drop it in, it doesn't have to be so hot. ”

"I think it's okay, it's not that hot. ”

"Of course you're fine, you blow the air conditioner at home, you blow the air conditioner when you drive, and when you walk two steps to the store, you blow the air conditioner again. You sweat a few drops a day, and you don't feel it hot or not. "I said one sentence, and Xia had ten words to refute me.

Xia bought a lot of old yogurt by himself, saying that he wanted to freeze it into ice cream to eat, I sat at the counter to collect the money, Xia ran back and forth, I looked upset, and asked, "Your feet are on fire." ”

"It's almost baked, you just don't have to look at it. ”

"If you don't look at it, it's okay, you can go one trip at a time, one trip at a time, it's strange that it can be frozen into ice cream. ”

Xia was sitting at the counter, and a child was looking for Xia with a book, saying that he had done the arithmetic problem and asked Xia to change it.

"I'll go, what about your father, let me change one plus one, won't he be himself?" Xia complained, but still took the book.

"Yang Fan, what grade are you in? ”

"First grade. ”

"Do you know who I am?"

The little boy shook his head, and Natsu brought him into the counter and said, "If you don't know me, you can come and let me change your homework." ”

"Dad asked me to do it. ”

"Your dad is just lazy, he won't change such a simple question for you, you see what you're wrong and do it again. Xia looked at the child and asked, "What about Yu Wen?"

"He came home, and my dad asked me to do my homework and murdered him away. ”

I've been sitting on the ground every day to correct my mistakes, Xia is very busy, coming to recycle wine bottles, and cleaning up, and the pile of waste left by people who vomit, I want to vomit when I look at it, squatting aside and cleaning up with Xia.

When Xia was leaving every day, he said to him, "Go back and give Yu Wen the questions you did, let him do it again, you know no." ”

Yang Fan nodded, hugged the notebook and ran away.

"This is the boy who came to shelter from the rain that day?" I asked Natsu.

"Hmm. ”

"Yes, it's good-looking, but suddenly such a son appeared. ”

"It's a good head, look at it, in a few years, he will play with this little gangster, it is better to be with his mother, send it for something, and spoil a child. ”

"Don't worry about it, it's not that bad. ”

In the evening, Grandpa Seven limped into the bar and told Xia that Grandpa Bai had died.

Xia was shocked after hearing this, frowned, the corners of his eyes drooped, and he stretched out randomly, as if nothing had happened, and asked, "Tomorrow's funeral?"

"Well, don't come, just take a look at it at night. "Grandpa Seventh sent a letter to Xia, but this news didn't hit Xia anymore, Xia didn't ask anything, as if he knew about it a long time ago, and the shock when he first heard the news was just a must-go procedure.

The eldest sister of the surrogate walked in again, chatted with Xia, chatted and chatted, and persuaded Xia not to go to school, and she couldn't make money, she still had a business on hand to take care of Xia, Xia still asked curiously, and her mouth was extremely cooperative with her sister's work, saying what to promise.

The eldest sister was very perfunctory, and she left angrily, muttering, "It's just this kind of brainlessness, it's over if you can be admitted to school." ”

"You forgot that you almost died last time, don't you? Xia also muttered quietly when she heard the eldest sister talking about herself.

"What's the matter? I asked Xia curiously.

"It's all yours. Natsu heard me ask her and gave me a blank look.

Xia told me that before, the eldest sister helped people with surrogacy, it has been several months, and people suspect that it is not their own child, they feel that the eldest sister is not clean, and they don't want the child in the belly.

One night, it's all summer, this twenty-year-old girl, really busy, she has sophistication, gags, reading and literacy, she is indispensable everywhere, her feet don't seem to be able to touch the ground, she must run.

At night, Xia's bicycle had a puncture, her bicycle was very old, I had never ridden Xia's car, for fear that if I used force, the saddle would break, her car had always had a squeaky business, and it was louder when braking, and I asked Xia "Is the car broken?" ”

"No, it's always been like that. "Xia also put on a lot of oil, but it just can't eliminate this abrasive sound.

Xia looked at the car, felt that there was no need to repair it, kicked it down, helped it up again, and pushed it to the yard in front of the door of the seventh grandfather's house, at twelve o'clock in the evening, the lights at the seventh grandfather's house were still on, and the yard door was also open, Xia pushed it out and came out, saying that the seventh grandfather knew what was going on when he saw the car.

Natsu sat in the car, and I asked, "What if you don't have a car?"

"I'll buy one tomorrow. ”

"Why don't I buy one too, ride to work with you, and exercise along the way. ”

"Okay, let's go see it tomorrow. ”

I still have insomnia, I don't even have the interest in reading, I find a bottle of body lotion, rub it vigorously on my hands, body, keep blowing the air conditioner, blowing until my body is about to crack, after applying it, my hands are moist, but I am afraid, afraid that when I wash my hands, it will change back to the original state.

Xia squatted at the door of the refrigerator, tinkering with himself to freeze the ice cream, I wanted to eat it, but I was afraid that it would be too late, and I would have a stomachache after eating, "Xia, you eat less, it will cool your stomach." ”

"No, it turns into water in your mouth after eating. ”

Xia is still squatting next to the refrigerator to eat ice cream, I sit cross-legged on the sofa, a little hot, I can't sleep, Xia has gone to sleep, I am still sitting on the sofa, the taste of insomnia is very uncomfortable, I think of Wang Xiaobo's golden age, there is a sentence in the preface, saying that when I woke up in the middle of the night, I spread my legs, looked at my little brother, and looked at the ceiling in frustration, I seemed to experience that feeling, I couldn't tell it, but it was not a taste in my heart, uncomfortable and accumulated in my chest, but it seemed to be nothing.

Today there is no sense of sadness in the past, but there is more accumulation of heart, I am dull today, nothing happened, why there are so many complex emotions at night.

I couldn't take it anymore and finally took sleeping pills and fell asleep.

When I woke up, Xia had already gone to class, there was breakfast on the table, I went to have a physical examination, and I went to get the report a few days later, and when I entered the hospital, I was very nervous, but when I sat in front of the machine, I was relieved, and I no longer had any thoughts in my heart, so I waited quietly for the examination to be completed.

If I am sick, I quietly wait for the onset of illness, wait for death to come, and if not, I will continue to suffer until the day when I can't survive anymore, embracing death.