I didn't think it made any difference when my sister wasn't at home, because she had to come back after all. My sister and I both have college degrees, which is the lowest level of higher education, but it is also a university. A girl, majoring in mold manufacturing in college, of course, I dare to say that when she first chose her major, she didn't know why she chose this, just to have one. Graduation has to face a job, and it is not impossible for girls to operate CNC machine tools, but there are too few people to do this, so it is not very realistic for my old sister to go. Later, after several turns, I don't know how fate was arranged, I went to make a pastry, from the beginning of the tart, bread, cake, slowly more and more proficient, now in our county a very big supermarket job, or very good for us, for her own feeling is also very good, can see that sister she likes. Usually the old sister works in the county, just like the current home, although there is no figure of her at home, but she can feel that she is there. But now, it obviously feels different, not to mention disappearing, it's also half missing.

You said that people usually don't have their own memories until what age they are, and I feel so late. In my childhood memories, I remember that I was quite old before I had the shadow of my sister, and I was ashamed. My sister was born in 1991, and in 91 years the family planning was the strictest, according to the words of the older generation, she was pregnant with a second child that year, even if she was about to give birth, she would be killed if she was caught. My father worked in a coal mine in Shanxi, and my mother went to Shanxi when she was pregnant with her younger sister and never came back until she was born. My mother said that when I went back to my grandmother's house occasionally, my sister was tightly wrapped, afraid that people would see her.

My memory is from the time when my father and mother came home to visit my family, and for a few years, I couldn't remember it even when I closed my eyes. I remember that my father and mother were going back to Shanxi after visiting relatives, and I hid behind a wheat stack in the wheat field, and I didn't want to go back with them. In my memory, my mother stood not far from the wheat stack and called me, but I hid behind the wheat stack, folding the wheat straw in my hand and didn't go out, as if I heard what my grandmother said to my mother, and there was a sentence, "He doesn't leave, let him be at home." The mother then left in silence. When I went out to look at it, I happened to see the back of my mother leaving, and now that I think about it, my mother was not fat, she was also young at that time, and her back was thin. I was supposed to call her, I'm sure. But life is not so much if...... I still remember that the wheat had just been harvested, spring had passed and summer had not yet arrived, the willow leaves were fresh, not too old, and the wind was fluttering. I was five years old that year, because when my grandfather sent me to the village primary school, he said that I was one year younger, and my grandfather was still ......

It's strange that I remember the year I lived in the countryside, but I don't remember the time I spent in Shanxi before I came to the countryside. Maybe the years of life with grandparents are a bit heavy. The parents still returned to Shanxi, and the children's emotions remained for a short time, and they didn't remember it at that time.

The village is located on the plain, and there is a large pit in front of the village, which is actually a pond, but the local customs call it a pit, and the pit is as long as the village. When I was five years old, I should have been in '93, and I was born in '88. There are many small tiled houses with mud walls in the village, and many courtyard walls are made of mud, mixed with some wheat bran, and the gate is very narrow, about one meter two, which is made of two wooden boards. My grandparents' house is a big iron gate, the gate is very wide and one meter eight, after my parents left, I lived with my grandparents in the west wing, the west wing and the gate are one, and the gate faces west. At the beginning, I didn't dare to run around in the yard alone, because there were geese in the yard, and the big white goose was very fierce, and it hurt very much to twist my legs. Later, the big white goose was locked up, and the situation improved.

The small courtyard is in the alley, the alley is very short, there are only two in the north and south, the grandfather's house is in the north, and there is another one next to the south. There were three brothers and a girl in the front yard, and I don't remember what the eldest was called, but the second one called You, and the third one called You, but I don't remember what the girl's name was. Yu is a year older than me and about my age. Adults don't stay at home for long anymore, and usually go to the fields after eating. And most of the children in the countryside are free-range, yes, free-range. I remember my grandmother said to Xiu: "You, you lead Xiaoming to play and let him follow you." "Then when the adults went to work in the fields, I would go to the small courtyard of the Xiujia family to play with him.

Maybe I have nothing to do, You has a lot of sheep at home, and usually after lunch at noon, You will graze sheep in the river or in the woods outside the village. You said that in the morning there was dew on the grass, and the sheep did not eat it. And I'll follow him to herd the sheep. When we were together, he told me a lot of things I didn't know. For example, the sparrow is called a small worm, and the grasshopper is called a flat belt, and so on. All this is very novel, the chewing of the sheep when they eat the grass, the cry of the sheep when they are driving the sheep, the feeling of the grass walking on the grass and the thorns of the grass on the ankles, the prickly and wet when there is dew in the morning, all of these attract my eyes. You told me that you can take me to pick up the little worms (sparrows) when you have time. I'm just listening, and I don't know what a little bug (sparrow) is. You also taught me to climb trees, and it really hurts when the bark is cut through the skin, but I don't say that it hurts, because I am afraid that my friends will look down on me. Yoo is really sloppy when he climbs the tree. At that time, I also knew that it was easy to go up a tree and difficult to get off a tree, and I knew a lot of slang between villages.

Yu was a very poor child, his mother was not in good health, and when he lived at his grandparents' house for a long time, he heard that his mother was sick. Once, after the village doctor saw his mother, he shook his head at You's father and left with his medicine kit. In those days, my grandmother arranged for me to say, "Mother You is sick, don't go to his house to disturb his mother's rest." "However, when I was a child, I always thought about my friends. Once, after lunch, I ran to You's house again, and when I entered the door, I saw You's mother basking in the sun in the yard. She also smiled at me and said, "Ming is looking for a show." I looked at her and said, "Yes." "What kind of woman is that, she is very thin, but not black, but her face is very yellow and has a lot of spots, the yellow is very deep, it seems to go deep into it, her smile is very reluctant, it seems to be very difficult, but she can feel it very kind.

I don't know how long it took me, but I know that when I went again, You's mother died, lying on the bed covered with a white cloth, You's brother and sister were at the bedside, You's was standing, I saw You's father screwing him hard, and then You's kneeling on the ground and crying. There were not many people in You's house that day, and in the afternoon, four men from the village walked out of You's house carrying a coffin. When I saw them, they were just out of the gate of You's house, and there were only four men carrying a coffin. It feels like it's getting dark, but it's going to get dark. Later, when I went to You's house, I would often look at the bed in his house, the bed that You's mother was covered with a white cloth at the time.

You still often go to herd sheep, and I still go with him often, and every day I go to You's house, I see his sister busy in the kitchen. When I was a child, I can't say how long a child can remember an event at that time, and I don't understand the feelings of adults......

Many things in life have passed in the past, but some traces have indeed survived and become memories. No matter whose story it is, this memory is a part of my life......