(a)

The false dome of heaven was dim, and the charred sun hung in the west, burned out a hundred million years ago.

Time and space stop flowing, everything falls into a dead silence, new life is no longer born, and what is already there does not pass away. The cold shell rests here, and from this moment on, embrace the eternal dream.

This is the underworld, a place to say goodbye to the dead.

Now, for the first time in history, this dead world is filled with vivid cherry blossoms.

The reason for this is nothing more than a protracted change caused by the whim of a bored ghost. When the westbound demon cherry blossom fell into a deep sleep again, the "spring" stored in its body, which originated from the yang world, was released together, and swept towards the breach between the yin and yang worlds, dyeing the dead trees along the way that would never have bloomed again. As a result, those who covet the cherry blossoms come one after another across the realm of life and death, and again and again break the tranquility that belongs only to the dead, drinking and having fun in front of the graves of countless deceased souls, disturbing people's dreams, which is called "feast".

At sunset, another group of guests who had come to the banquet arrived in the underworld.

The staircase of white jade extends from the front of the eyes and feet to the distant and unreachable side. The cherry blossoms on both sides of the stairs are full of shadows at a glance.

"Smack!"

The front foot that stepped out stepped on the first step leading to the White Jade Tower, and the slightly cold footsteps suddenly spread throughout this empty and silent world.

"Okay, it's decided!"

The big library, Pache Noregui, clenched her fists and yelled at the people behind her:

"Don't stop me, I want to climb this mountain by my own strength!"

"Bang Bang ......"

Standing behind her, all the members of the Red Devil Pavilion family applauded her courage.

"Come on, Patsy!" Remilia Scarlett smiled widely, "I'll miss you!"

"Don't default to my death!"

"You have three seconds left in your life, three seconds, three seconds!" Flandoro added, pointing her index finger at Patchouli's back, with Kenjiro's expression and tone.

"Do you want to fight and kill the child!"

"It's okay Miss Patchoury," Catherine said with a calm and polite face, "this is the underworld, you can go there in peace, and you don't have to worry that no one will collect the body for you." ”

"I said I wouldn't die!"

"Can I have some of the inheritance?" interjected Sir Sciakros.

"Divide your sister!"

"For the funeral, I'll take care of it for you. ”

"Sakiya, you traitor!"

"The epitaph reads 'My career, no regrets'. ”

"Little ...... Ahem!"

Pache didn't take a breath, and the asthma sufferer's face turned pale all of a sudden, as if she was dying. She thumped her chest hard, shuddered, pulled a tube of asthma spray out of her pocket, and took a sharp puff. Before she could regain her breath, she hunched her back and hung her head, staggering like a zombie to the disrespectful little devil, and raised her hand to knock her demon to the ground with a slap of the vajra arm.

"You bastards—"

So a magical scene appeared, the witch Pachou Norregui, who was famous for her quietness, first knocked out her own demon with a punch, and then stepped on the little devil's body with one foot, like a gorilla, and beat her chest with both hands in fists in demonstration. In fact, if she could breathe fire, it might have been even better.

"So every time I get to this time, I miss the Celestial Shooting Pill Bun so much......"

Thinking so, Nalan smiled and walked behind Patchouli amid laughter and applause.

"Everyone, everyone, be quiet!"

He clapped his hands vigorously twice, and when the scene gradually cleared up, he gently put his hands on Pache shoulders, and said very seriously:

"First of all, I don't think it's right for you to laugh at Pache who is trying to lose weight. ”

As soon as these words came out, there was a warm current that flowed down her ears and into Pache Li's body. She looked up and glanced at Nalan Twilight's face, which happened to be watching her at the same time. He had a warm, doting, reassuring smile on his face like a big brother.

"Sure enough," Patchouli's eyes glistened with tears, "I didn't see anyone wrong......

"Of course you don't. ”

She heard Nalan Twilight say this.

"Think about it," Nalan raised his voice so that everyone present could hear, "an asthma patient who worked tirelessly and took the initiative to leave the comfortable environment, just to be able to overcome his physical condition and rely on his own efforts to obtain a ghostly healthy and beautiful body. Comrades, what kind of spirit is this? This is a revolutionary spirit! You have ridiculed people who have worked so hard, and tell me, is this kind of behavior appropriate?"

"Yes," Flandoro held her head proudly, "because I'm just a cutie, and I don't understand anything." ”

"Yes," Remilia raised her head even more haughtily than her sister, "because I'm just a little bat and I don't understand anything." ”

"Yes," said Sir Sciakros, not only raising his head but also cocking his tail, "for I am only a kitten, and I know everything." ”

"These calves ......"

Pachouli gritted her teeth, and when she saw that she was about to go up and beat someone, she was forcibly held down by Nalan Yu. I heard him cough twice, clear his throat, and continue:

"Therefore, for the disabled...... Pache is not in excellent physical condition, what we should do is not to ridicule and sarcasm, but to ......"

As he spoke, he got down on one knee, lifted Pache from her long lilac hair, closed her eyes tightly, and kissed her lips on the strand of her hair with the solemnity of a wedding ceremony. At that moment, Pacouli's heartbeat almost stopped. She couldn't breathe, "this must be an asthmatic," she thought, and reached for the pill bottle, only to rummage through her pockets and find nothing. It was only then that she realized that the little vial had been in her hand all along.

The air froze, although, the air of the underworld has always frozen. The girls around them all covered their mouths and blushed, waiting for Nalan Yu's next move without saying a word. I saw him slowly open his eyes, straighten up, and then open his mouth slightly, and said his next line:

"The highest respect for those who are dying. ”

"The old lady exploded!"

Pache threw the asthma pill bottle down the steps, smashed it, and then tore the purple and white robe, revealing the elastic shapewear and the slime-like belly - she didn't bother to care about her image anymore.

"Quack, aaaa

Pachouli was completely insane, and she didn't know where to borrow the strength, she grabbed Nalan Twilight's waist with both hands and raised it above her head, jumped up and hit the edges and corners of the steps with a big head and threw him in half. Then, she patted her chest vigorously, and opened her mouth to spew out a wave of broken sounds, which shook the fat up and down her body like waves.

"Drink, ahhh

And so the air of the underworld was once again filled with laughter.

However, after that, for some reason, Patchouli's tears could not be stopped.

(b)

"I'm resurrected!"

Completing the invertebrate self-regeneration, the Shotimaru exploded the tombstone engraved with her own name and popped out of the coffin.

"Oh, congratulations. ”

Ji Haitangguo, who was holding Nin***do Sw**ch playing horse racing in front of her grave, moved her mouth without raising her head, and her weak words fully and completely expressed her thoughts and feelings at the moment:

It's my business.

"It's time for a big splash!"

Wen shouted, picking up her housekeeping weapon - the market price is 1, followed by a Leica SLR camera that you don't want to know how many zeros there are. Now, this camera has a cute little earthworm living in the memory card slot.

"If you want news, there may be one in the bamboo forest. ”

With that, she put down her N******* S *****, pulled out her vintage flip phone from her pocket, clicked on a photo in the gallery, and placed it in front of Wen.

On top of it was a pair of white pants with a carrot motif, and needless to say, it was Reisen's.

“OH~YEAH~”

Wen Liang's eyes widened, and he let out a sound, quite soul-shattering...... Praise?

In short, with the spirit of "daring to be the first", or more colloquially, "running faster than anyone else", Wen held the camera, spread her wings, and soared into the sky, before the two black feathers she left behind hit the ground, there was no shadow.

"Retarded. ”

Guo muttered quietly, removing the thumb pressed to the bottom of the screen, revealing the date the photo was taken—it was a week ago. Of course, at that time, Wen was still squatting in the grave reading the resurrection CD, so no one could blame him.

However, in this way, the resumption of the "Wenwen. I'm afraid the news doesn't have much of an exclusive story.

"Smack!"

Ji Haitang closed the cover of the phone and flew in the opposite direction to Wen - in front of her, there was the underworld.