Si Jianlian took one last look at me and Duan Jingchen, and left with a sneer.

I let Duan Jingchen into the room, shook my head at him and said, "Doubao must be watching from upstairs, it's not appropriate for you to do this." And I'm having a hard time. ”

"Go up and explain to the bean bag. Duan Jingchen raised his leg and was about to go upstairs.

I stretched out my hand and grabbed him and said, "It's not appropriate for you to go, I'll go and say." ”

I looked at the stairs and was a little embarrassed.

Doubao, this kid has really experienced too much instability with me. Can I be like other mothers and endure more for the sake of their children.

In the process of going upstairs, I thought about the scenes that happened to the bean bag, and my heart hurt very much.

Beanbao didn't sleep, and when I pushed the door open, he had just run back from the window.

I walked over and grabbed his hand and forcibly pulled him into my arms, and then I sat down on the mat with him in my arms: "Bean bag, did you see it all just now?"

"Mom, I don't know what you're talking about. Doubao didn't look at me, bowed his head and said.

"Dad's business, just downstairs, my father and mother had some disputes, and Uncle Duan happened to see it, so he did it to your father. I said in a soft voice, "Uncle Duan is a quick temper, and he is impulsive and just like that." ”

"Mom, what do you think of Uncle Duan?" asked Doubao.

I was stunned by his question: "What do you think?"

"It's good, will take care of mom. He paused for a moment and continued, "And he will take care of me and play games with me." ”

"Mom thinks he's good, too. I said.

"Mom, you and Uncle Duan should get married. Doubao looked up at me and said.

When I heard such childish words, I was going to laugh and tell him that marriage was not as simple as he thought, and it wasn't because whoever was good to him had to be with whom.

But when I looked down, I saw that his little face was full of tears.

I swallowed back what I was about to speak, patted him on the back and said, "Speak slowly, what's wrong, why do you think my mother should marry Uncle Duan?"

Doubao heard my question and cried. He couldn't speak when he cried, and I didn't rush it, patting him gently on the back and waiting for him to calm down.

After a long while, he stopped crying and said to me with tears on his face: "Mom, they say that you are not a good woman, that I have many fathers, and that you are like this because of your money." Say you're out there......"

Bean Bao can't go on.

I don't have to ask to know that it's not a good word, and the child may not be able to learn it.

"Who said that?" I asked.

"Kindergarten children, they told me, you are different from others, others only have one father, you have many fathers. He also said......" Doubao's little face turned red, and he stammered for a long time and said, "You also said that you are raising men outside." ”

Today's children know what it means to be fostered.

I looked at the sad appearance of the bean bag, and it was like a knife in my heart.

This is the reality of society. The man is divorced, and no matter how many women there are around him, no one will say anything, at most, he will say that he is unmarried, but he can't play how he wants. When a woman is divorced, as long as there is a man around her, she will be talked about. On the surface, our society has progressed. In fact, it is the essence of a patriarchal society.

However, we all live in such a society, and we can't escape from it. I can only make myself as comfortable as possible.

"Mom, if you marry Uncle Duan, others won't say how you are doing outside. When Doubao said this, he cried again, "Mom, okay?"

I hugged him, and I was also sad.

It seems that I think the impact of things is too small. I thought that as long as I could deal with it calmly, everything would be fine. Now, it seems, this is not the case at all. Doubao is also in this society, and he will also be affected.

He doesn't know where he heard these rumors, it should be because of the photos and lace news between me and He Xiao recently.

"Doubao, are you really willing to accept Uncle Duan?" I asked.

He nodded, "Yes." ”

"If my mother doesn't marry anyone, she will remain in her current state and not talk to any man...... "I stopped here when I said it myself.

I'm in business, and it's impossible not to have contact with men, and what I just said is equivalent to not saying anything.

But I really don't want to get married like this.

I'm not saying that Duan Jingchen is bad, but because he's so good, I don't want him to live his life with someone who doesn't love him.

"Mom. Doubao called me and didn't say anything.

I soothed him and diverted him from talking about other things. Finally, put him to sleep.

By the time I got downstairs, it was almost an hour before I went up. Duan Jingchen was still waiting for me downstairs, and he also made a few dishes.

"Can't you eat beans?" he asked.

"I'm crying, I'm tired of crying, wait for him to recover, if he wakes up, he will come down to eat, and if he doesn't wake up, he will eat again tomorrow morning." I said.

"Then you can eat a little, although my craft is not very good, but I can make do to fill my stomach. Duan Jingchen said.

I really didn't have an appetite, but looking at his serious and expectant look, it was hard to refuse, so I took the chopsticks and said to him, "Thank you." ”

"I was so impulsive today that I really didn't expect the bean bag to be looking at it. Hey, it's my fault, I will take into account the feelings of the bean bag when I do anything in the future. Tomorrow, how about I apologize to Doubao and take him to climb the mountain?" Duan Jingchen asked.

"It's still too cold, and the wind is so strong in the mountains. I followed his words and changed the subject.

"Then why don't you go horseback riding, I have a friend who runs a big equestrian club in the suburbs of Beijing, and I'll take you there. Boys, I definitely like this. Duan Jingchen said again.

He is a confident, proud and resolute person, and he is here to be careful in all kinds for my feelings. Looking at his cautious appearance, I couldn't bear it a little and asked, "Duan Jingchen, you don't have to care about my feelings like this, if I really choose to be with you, do you have to be careful for the rest of your life?"

He raised his eyes to look at me, and his eyes were full of surprise: "Isn't it what a man should do to be careful with his wife and coax and spoil him? You have given me your whole life, why should I treat you well?"

I looked at his serious eyes and really didn't know what to say. After holding it for a long time, I said: "Actually, real love should be to be your true self in front of each other, because you know that no matter what you do, he will accommodate you." ”

Duan Jingchen smiled: "Yes, no matter what you do, I will accommodate you." ”

"What about yourself?" I asked.

He was stunned for a moment and said, "What do I have? ”

"People have bad moods and bad tempers, you can do this to me for a day, or you can do this to me for a year, but a lifetime is too long, what about your bad mood?" I asked.

Duan Jingchen will always be the same in front of me, and I know that people can't always treat others with gentleness and generosity. What's more, it is a husband and wife, one before marriage, and another after marriage.

Now, the distance between us, if it really goes all the way in the future. Can I accept the other side of him?

"I can't possibly have bad feelings about you. Duan Jingchen thought for a while and said.

I looked at him and shook my head slowly: "Impossible, just think about yourself in your daily life." You treat me like this, which actually makes me feel a little fake. ”

As soon as I spoke, I glanced at him.

Duan Jingchen's expression didn't change much.

"So I think you should put a whole self in front of me, so that I will know if I want to marry you or not. I looked at him and said, "Actually, you can understand when you see between Qiao Jian and He Xiao." Before getting married, what He Xiao was like to her, and what is it like now. I remember someone said that in marriage, women add to feelings, and men subtract from feelings. A man's love is at its peak at the moment of marriage. ”

"In my opinion, love is to see someone and want to be good to her unconditionally and without expecting anything in return. I think it's too complicated for you to say that. Still, I'll think about what the whole me looks like. You want to see, and I'm trying to be complete in front of you. Duan Jingchen said seriously, "However, I am like this eighty percent of the time, but when I face you, I can't help but want to be a little better to you, a little better." ”

I smiled.

Such love words are pleasant to listen to.

Duan Jingchen's dinner didn't taste very good, and I drove out the bad mood brought by Si Jianlian.

At half past ten in the evening, he said goodbye to me and left. When he said goodbye at the door, he said to me: "Tao Ran, in fact, at our age, there is no purpose for feelings. As long as you feel comfortable and relaxed together, you will be together. I don't know how you feel, but I'm filled with joy to be with you. ”

After he said too much, he hugged me and got into the car with a smile.

I thought about his words, thought about the words of the bean bag, and my heart was a little messed up again.

On the weekend, Duan Jingchen took me and Doubao to ride a horse, Xiaodoubao was the first time to contact a horse, and I was a little scared at first, and after being led by someone to ride for half an hour, I refused to come down. I'm timid, especially in this regard. So, no matter what they said to me in the field, I wouldn't get on the horse and ride around, just take pictures with my phone.

For two days on the weekend, Duan Jingchen accompanied Doubao and me for a day and a half. In the last half day, there was an impromptu meeting of the government department on the piece of land he had gotten, so he rushed over.

Originally, I was still thinking about whether to get married in this life. However, something happened on Monday that caught me off guard and made me realize that I am a selfish mother. I would hardly make any sacrifices for my children, because five years of being a housewife taught me so much that I didn't dare to give up on myself anymore.