During my previous internship, my father fell seriously ill. When I hurried to the hospital after work, my mother had already finished feeding my father's dinner. My father, who could hold my father with one hand when he was a child, is now like a log on the white bed. Most of his hands were bruised, and there were six or seven packs of drips a day, most of which I couldn't name.

When the attending doctor told us the bad news, I didn't dare to shed a single tear, I was afraid that if I cried, my mother would collapse, and there seemed to be a voice crying in my head: You don't have a father in the future, and your original father won't come back.

Luckily, my mom – even though they had been arguing in the past – quit her job while my dad was in bed and took care of her day and night. After my internship, I still need to go back to school to continue my studies. In order to help my mother reduce the burden, I took a two-hour car to the hospital after class, helping my father peel apples and emptying urinals, and doing what I should do as a child bit by bit.

Not just because I'm a child, not because I'm a daughter, but because I love him, he's my dad and I love him. If I don't love someone, even if he is my father, I will not take care of it - love is giving, giving is mutuality - so sometimes, I would rather they no longer love each other, and one day they can let each other go free, I am such a not-so-lovely person.

Half a year later, my father's health finally got better, in order to repay the vows, I went to the temple to burn a few pillars of high incense, it happened that the adoption center was doing activities in the temple, I received a big white cat, white clouds and black dogs, it is called black dogs, which is counted as a return to God.

Such a worrying and precarious life has just ended, but some people point to their noses and say that I have lived too well and do not know the suffering of the world.

"Do you say it again? In this interview office, in front of these classmates who don't know each other, do you say it again?" I stood up as soon as I brushed it, and the soy sauce was not far behind, and the two of us stood side by side, two old eggplants pressed by black, like grenades that were going to the battlefield together.

Perry looked at me with a sneer, she held her head high, like a proud rooster, and said something in her words: "People like you are cheap and good." ”

The fire of Perry and Bonyuhua had begun to burn two years earlier, staining the distant northern sky red. Soy sauce and I have never forgotten, but we deliberately ignored the fact that these two young ladies who don't touch the spring water with their fingers are hiding in the crowd and watching the two of us carrying shovels away. They are the ones who rely on their identity as girls, coquettish with boys, and escape labor, but she is here now, accusing me of being a hard-working old scalper.

"Okay, okay, don't you quarrel anymore, if there's anything to do with the quarrel after it's over, can't you?" said the other girl, frowning.

Blood poured back from my limbs into my brain, my hands and feet were cold, my legs were numb, and I quietly took a breath and realized that I was too naïve: why should I play the harp against a cow with someone who has nothing to do with it. Human beings are creatures that have no way to empathize, your happiness has nothing to do with others, and your sadness is dismissive to others. No matter how painful, sad, disappointed, or helpless you are, even if your scalp is numb because of the suffering, and your whole body seems to be about to be blown apart, there is no way to make others feel one ten-thousandth.

I regained my composure and sat down with soy sauce in my hand. My suffering Perry is unknown, and Perry's hard work is the same for me, and I can't empathize. Maybe she looked at countless intermediaries and finally could only choose a one-room apartment facing north, maybe she was alone in her room cooking instant noodles to survive, maybe she was pinching her nose and holding the toilet to pass the toilet in an old-fashioned public house that had long been in disrepair......

The magic capital is the same for each of us, whether it is a foreigner or a local. It is a crystal ball that is high in the sky, and the central city is perfectly sealed in glass, with singing and dancing, fireworks and brilliant fireworks, gorgeous and gorgeous.

Those of us who have just entered the society can only look up at the lights above our heads, calculate the amount of Alipay and Huabei, and think about whether to use a few months of living expenses to buy a famous brand to whitewash our fantasies about the metropolis.

What we originally wanted was a simple bed, a bowl of rice, and a warm home, but we had to stumble and do our best to earn a small amount of money in this city where we were not crazy or not Buddhas, and try not to be crushed by education, medical care, and real estate.

In the glass ball of the four seasons, a man in a customized suit, wearing an expensive watch worth a suite in the city center, full of the smell of expensive perfumes, standing at the top and sipping red wine, sighing that only I climb to the heights, the world is full of ants. He doesn't care at all, in the news, because of the benign liquidation of the financial industry, they lost ten years of savings, and the families of ordinary people who went bankrupt in an instant, in his eyes, they only lost hundreds of thousands of millions.

The senior sister in the mouth of the project teacher pushed open the door and said hello to us. She was dressed in a zara suit, her delicate makeup still couldn't hide the big dark circles under her eyes, she was holding the latest iPhone in her right hand and wearing a string full of Pandora beads, and in her left hand she was holding our resumes and wearing a one-carat tail ring on her little finger. With great difficulty, she sat us down one by one, looked at it for five minutes, threw her resume on the table, introduced her own mental journey, and said, you can introduce yourself to me again.

Perry reintroduced herself passionately, this time she simply focused on all the experiences and awards from freshman to senior, and expressed her extreme yearning to work in Wanzi Group.

When it was my turn, I said lightly that I had won scholarships every year from elementary school to university, that I had won outstanding member awards in the three clubs I had participated in after college, that I had written a semester in a row on the radio station, that I had won two college awards, and that I had interned at three large companies.

Perry's eyes looked like they were going to eat me.

Not surprisingly, the beautiful senior sister was very eye-catching to me, and distributed the job application form from my direction down in turn, "If you are sure to stay, fill out the form and hand it to the front desk, you can go to work from the beginning of the Qingming Festival." At the end of the probationary period, there will be HR and you to meet each other, combined with specific work performance, and select the best. ”

"Come to work after the Qingming Festival, or are you going to come to work during the Qingming Festival?" asked Soy Sauce as he raised his hand.

"Qingming Festival, that is, I will go to work two days later, and I will give you two days to do the handover. We are short of manpower here, and if it weren't for that, it would be a bit difficult to rely on your academic qualifications. "Senior sister is gentle, and the knife makes our hearts ache, especially for the three people who failed the graduate school entrance examination. After that, she explained a few more words, and the project teacher came back.

"How about it, have you thought about it? I just finished the phone call with your senior, and I won him to join the group...... If you do a good job, I promise it's the same, everyone is rushing to get it. ”

"Teacher, we will learn from the seniors!" Perry said with a swear.

The project teacher nodded with satisfaction, like a smuggler in the movie, and after a cordial goodbye to us, he sent someone to escort us out of the building.

In order to facilitate contact, one of the girls proposed to add a friend, so we exchanged mobile phones with each other, added WeChat, changed the name note, and then chatted a few more words, and walked to the subway station together. Soy sauce thought that Perry and I would have a big fight outside, but I didn't expect either of us to mention the quarrel again.

It wasn't until my phone was lit up by a WeChat message that Wei Lin sent a big question mark.

I inexplicably swiped to unlock it, only to see that on our WeChat chat, the message I sent five minutes ago was prominently displayed: "Actually, I've had a crush on you for a long time, let's make an appointment to meet, okay?"

I fell into an ice cellar, my mind was numb, and my face turned from red to purple, and then from purple to white. Recalling the scene of exchanging mobile phones just now, my mobile phone stayed in Perry's hands for a long time, and she was really a little clever.

I'll admit that I used to like mirin, and I can see that I like soy sauce as a single person. In the past, when I encountered difficulties, the first person I thought of was him; in the past period of time, when I met unhappy, the first person I thought of was him; when I was happy, the first person I thought of was him. But I didn't take the initiative to go to him, but waited for him to come to me, and more than once in this relationship, I stepped back, inch by inch, because he never showed that he liked me.

I can't fall in love with someone, I didn't dare before, but now I can't, like a small boat that has been sailing for a long time in a storm, just wanting to fall asleep on the sea level where the wind and rain have gradually stopped. I'm more afraid that one day when I get close to someone, I'll roll on the ground like my black dog, and I'll want to eat canned food, I'll eat cat grass, and I'll eat everything he remembers. The man was afraid that he would spread his hands and walk away.

"What's the matter, are you going to tell him that you sent the wrong person?" Perry saw more clearly than I did, "You've been using him as a spare tire for so long, and you have to give people freedom." ”

I smiled and said to the other three, "Do you know Wei Lin?"

The three of them hesitated and nodded.

"Do you have his WeChat?"

"Yes. ”

"Have you talked?"

"Talked about ......" The two girls were quite embarrassed.

"Look," I said to Perry in a good voice, "isn't it obvious that in such a large database, take five samples, and everyone knows Wei Lin, and everyone has crossed paths with him?"

"Oh, then you've never liked him, have you?" I looked at her unkind face, and suddenly realized that she and I were at the same point every time, just because those were the things she cared about the most, and I was afraid that my former imaginary enemies were not only the wooden fish flowers, but also the Perry.

Although I can understand her, what I hate most is that my freedom is deprived by others, this is my end, I must take it back-