"You, alas! How many people have you harmed? I think you are an amorous seed, but a person with zero emotional intelligence is really a love seed! ”

Swallow interjected suddenly, which interrupted my thoughts again, and I recounted the past with Swallow like a story, and before I knew it, it was time for lunch.

I ordered Yanzi and myself the most famous signature dish of Tang Yuan, volcanic wings for 39 yuan a piece, and added a boiled cabbage heart and two small bowls of rice, which is considered a straight Chinese food.

I watched the swallow's expression as I ate, as if to find some insight into her facial expressions and the way she looked at her face. But the swallow just said lightly:

"Hanzhe, your emotions are too rich, aren't they? Seeing one who loves one?!Where is your sense of responsibility?" Yanzi looked at me with an embarrassed face, and said softly in a tone that was half reproachful and half self-talking: "It turns out that men can be like this? This is also terrible!"

I didn't answer Yanzi's words directly, but just looked at the pair of lovers sitting in the goose-shaped boat on the surface of Liuhua Lake thoughtfully, their ages seemed to be me and Xue'er back then. I thought to myself, I don't know what kind of situation Cher is in now?

After a while, when I came back to my senses, I said to the swallow:

"Yes, Yanzi, I am a bad person, a very bad, very bad person, especially in terms of feelings, I did not handle it well, and the naivety at that time made me feel guilty all my life! ”

After I said this, I smiled wryly at the swallow.

"Understandably, and no wonder, I was just over 20 years old at the time, and it was in Shenzhen. In addition, people in the field of art may be full of romanticism in dealing with emotions, and they may be like this in their bones, at least you are like this! Maybe this is your real side, and the complexity of people is too difficult for people to understand! Even if you are a person who gets along day and night, you can't be sure that you know him (her) very well! Or, what is hidden in the depths of your soul and what you think in your heart is not the side you usually see. Just like Cher, she never thought that you were such a person, but you were exactly such a person! At that time, you were really such an ungrateful person! Elder brother. Of course, I believe that you are not so bad in nature, and you are not thinking about doing it yourself, and in the dark, fate seems to be arranged like this. However, these three women have been miserable by you! You! I think none of them will end well? Perhaps, this is the primitive instinct of man and the weakness of human nature! These two things are fully revealed in you, and you are still naturally manifested. It's horrible!"

The professional habits and literacy of the Yanzi reporter criticized me so much that I was almost dissected to the fullest. Her stern tone, like the poor middle peasants fighting the landlords after liberation, I was criticized for having nothing to say, after all, in retrospect, what Yanzi said was not unreasonable. At the time, I was sorry for any of them!

However, there is no way to turn back time.

I had to bear it silently on my own!

After Yanzi finished speaking, Jing's eyes were red, maybe no matter how resolute a woman is, she will be affected by this tortuous emotional problem, and a woman's heart may also be more able to experience this cruel sadness! After all, everyone is a woman, I can understand. When I thought of this, I sincerely said to Xiaoyan:

"Swallow, thank you for listening to my nonsense, really appreciate. I reached out and shook the swallow's hand.

"What happened then, what are you going to do now?" asked me earnestly.

In fact, I don't know what to do next, and now I suddenly go to Xue'er, it's impossible, she won't see me, it's just an unnecessary trouble, and once it doesn't work, it will affect Hanxin. If this is the case, Cher will definitely hate me even more and will not forgive me anymore. Han Xin may be her lifeline, and when she doesn't forgive me, I won't disturb her current living habits and state, and I can even have a deeper communication with Han Xin for her, maybe this will be better, it won't break the life that we have been used to between each other, I must keep a normal heart.

"Later, alas, it's hard to say, it's hard to say!" I picked up the swallow's words, and there was a helpless look on my face. I always felt that I couldn't hide anything in front of Yanzi, a reporter, so I said with a wry smile:

"I want to meet Hanxin first, and it's not easy for her, but I hope she doesn't know the rights and wrongs. ”

I'm kind of answering the swallow's words.

The swallow looked at me with wide eyes and said:

"Han Zhe, don't be too naïve, sooner or later, this child will figure out everything about it, and she has the right to know, can she hide it from her for the rest of her life? I think it's better to tell her as soon as possible, Han Zhe, whose daughter is Han Xin? Is it Ah Zhen's daughter? Or Xue'er's daughter? But it's definitely not Jia Ling's. ”

After Yanzi said this, his eyes were fixed on me, as if he was saying to me with his eyes: "You don't tell me the truth?" I really can't answer at this time, and I can't draw conclusions until I understand it, I have to get some more information from Han Xin to confirm.

I poured tea into the swallow cup, and then said slowly:

"Alas, Swallow, I really can't answer your question right now, I... I...... Let's talk about Han Xin, you've seen her, how did she mention me to you? Could it be that Xue'er hinted at her, or said something to her? She just watched me sketch and chat for a while when she was a volunteer at the Jingxi Longzen Temple, could it be that she noticed something from my chat with her? No way, I didn't talk nonsense. This little girl is so smart!"

"Yes, the tiger father has no dog girl, haha, not to mention her mother, she is such a smart and clever person. Xue'er only told Han Xin that her father was a very handsome, talented, hard-working, persevering, and ambitious person. I think that Xue'er still erects a good image of her father for Hanxin in Hanxin's heart, and it can be seen that Xue'er has put a lot of effort into her acquired cultivation. From my conversation with Han Xin, she has never met her father, but she has respect and affection for her father, and she is even more eager to solve the doubts in her heart: why do all the relatives around her never mention her father? She seems to have gone to other places and asked a cousin whose name was, oh, Dandan, and she couldn't get any information about her father. She only said that Cher was often obsessed with an old green-skin writing diary, and sometimes she even cried secretly into the diary. She didn't dare to ask her mother herself, and when she saw her mother crying, she also cried. Guess that there may be some clues in that diary about her father, or maybe her mother is recording something about her father? Alas, it really hurts this little girl!

The swallow breathed a sigh of emotion, and I was speechless. Yanzi's words are reasonable, yes, asking this little girl to bear such a lot of psychological pressure really hurts this child. And Xue'er will live her life against the gossip and slander of the society and strange eyes all her life, you can imagine how hard a weak woman is! How strong is it! How much pressure needs to endure that ordinary people can't bear to raise Hanxin to grow up and cultivate so well!

Swallow looked at me, and from her skeptical eyes, it seemed that she wanted to understand why Xue'er could make a lifelong sacrifice to the man in front of her? Almost to the point of greatness! Could it be that love for a person can really make her give up everything? What kind of endurance and love energy does this have!!

Yan Zi thought for a while, and seemed to understand why Da Niu had not been married until now? Xiao Yan said to me as if to herself:

Just like Zhang Liangying sang: 'A blink of an eye is a lifetime, and a turn is a lifetime'. Alas, in this short life, there is only enough to love one person, Cher, just like that. ”

I also suddenly felt that life is just a few decades, and it is really a lifetime in the blink of an eye. Another example is Cao Mengde's "Short Song Xing", "How much life is, there are many hardships in the past", there is no one left in these years. In the same way, Da Niu is also deeply in love with Xiao Yan, and to this day he is still waiting for Xiao Yan to change his mind, what kind of strength is Da Niu supporting? Perhaps this is the power of love, Da Niu is really a good man standing behind the swallow! He does everything for Yan Zi in obscurity, and gives Yan Zi selfless dedication, isn't this also a kind of noble love? But Yan Zi is in the blessing and does not know the blessing? Da Niu also loves Yan Zi all his life!

"Yes, Yanzi, we are all this age, and Da Niu is bitter enough in his heart, you better go back to work with us and return to Da Niu. ”

I said to the swallow while it was feeling.

"You'd better think about your own business, I'll take care of my business. When are you going to see Hanxin? How many days are you going to stay in Guangzhou? This is Hanxin's Guangzhou mobile phone number, you can find her by yourself, it seems that it is inconvenient for me to be there. ”

Swallow said and gave me the phone number Han Xin gave her.

"Swallow, did Han Xin mention what Cher is doing now?" I asked Swallow tentatively.

Yanzi said: "I didn't ask her, but the last time Xue'er talked to me on the phone, I asked Xue'er, but Xue'er didn't answer positively, as if to say, write every day, read books, listen to her tone I think she is okay, she should live a worry-free life, right?"

After hearing this, I felt a little relieved in my heart, and said to Yanzi sincerely: "Yanzi, I will have to help a lot in the future, Xue'er is there, there is a chance to say good things for me, Hanxin here, please care more about and guide you." You first send a letter to Han Xin, and say that you have a classmate who is also her mother's classmate, and you want to meet her, so that she can be mentally prepared, and then I will ask her out, and it will be more reasonable, okay Yanzi?

Yanzi smiled bitterly and said, "Why did you kick the ball to me?" I won't be your peacemaker, Xue'er's side, I can't say anything to her, and I can't say anything for you. But I can do this by giving Han Xin a wind, but it's another thing if Han Xin can't see you. I won't ask Cher about the stories you said, I don't know, and the fewer people know about these stories, the better. Han Xin here, I can help take care of it, as for everything between you, don't count on me, have any advice and help, I don't do this thankless job. But I'm still grateful that you trusted me and told me this, thank you. ”

"Thank you, Swallow, thank you for listening to me so much, and thank you for your understanding. ”

Unconsciously, Tang Yuan was left with me and Xiaoyan at the table, several waiters were waiting for us to pay and leave, I looked at my watch, it was almost two o'clock in the afternoon, I looked at Xiaoyan and smiled, and we were ready to pay the bill and go back.