Wedge Five: Tears are not sunny when the autumn rain is sunny [1]

"Miss, Miss, where are you?" "Miss, come out quickly!"

The sound of the autumn equinox and Bai Lu is getting farther and farther away, so I don't want to be found by them, so they only listen to my brother's words, and they always refuse to go out to play with me. Pen × fun × Pavilion www. ｂｉｑｕｇｅ。 info I hid behind the greenery and pouted.

The raindrops in the wind are like pieces of flying flotsam carrying dreams.

I was holding a small emerald green oil-paper umbrella, and the corner of my sleeve was wet, but I didn't care.

Just a few days ago, there were a lot of martial arts warriors in Zhuangzi, and I secretly heard them behind the screen saying, what kind of demon is coming, please let my brother out of the village, and you must get rid of him. I didn't understand it, and I didn't pay attention to it, but my brother's face became ugly, and he didn't say a word.

Later, I asked Bai Lu and the autumn equinox, and they didn't know why, but said that my brother told them when he left, saying that he couldn't let me out of Zhuangzi during this time.

Three days after my brother left Zhuangzi, I hid from them and secretly ran out, and if I was not allowed to come out, I would want to come out. It's just that now, I don't know if the decision I sneaked out at that time was right or wrong.

Throwing off them, I was like a bird out of the cage, happy and free. The autumn rain is not heavy, sprinkled among the trees on the left and right, revealing a trace of coolness. My family lives in Jiangnan, which has a different beauty from the north.

I like the rainy Jiangnan, the green poplar sand embankment on the bank of the Qinhuai River, the lantern festival that year, the Qinhuai painting boat, the clear sound of the flute accompanied by the beauty of the fragrance and powder, and the neon clothes and feathers that have touched the hearts of many people.

I thought softly and walked slowly on the bluestone pavement, watching the rain hit the plantains and smelling the grass in the rain.

Suddenly, there was a noise in the grass of the hill, and I was slightly taken aback, and I thought to myself, could it be some kind of little beast?

I took a step and slowly stepped onto the knoll, and the rain fell on the paper umbrella, and the spilled water line flowed down the mountain road, which seemed to have a different taste. I walked cautiously, but there was a subtle excitement in my heart. Gradually, I noticed that the water on the ground was no longer colorless, but even a little bright red, so I hesitated.

If, at that time, I didn't go on, if I hadn't had that hint of excitement, if I hadn't ...... However, there is no if.

My hands trembled slightly, for I could clearly see the raindrops trembling in graceful arcs as they fell in front of my eyes. I leaned down and slowly picked up the piece of the first quarter moon in front of me with my right hand. It was jade, but it was stained with blood.

Just as I was staring at the piece of jade, pondering the story of its front and back, a figure rushed in front of me, trying to snatch it, and I was taken aback, and naturally pushed at him, taking a few steps back.

He gave me a push and hit the ground on his back, but he pounced angrily. Unfortunately, he was so badly injured that he couldn't pounce in front of me, and only glared at me viciously. I will never forget those eyes, resentful, lonely, awe-inspiring, like a wounded beast still desperately defending its territory and dignity, not allowing the slightest violation by anyone.

I was so frightened by his glaring that I wanted to run away immediately, but my legs were filled with mercury and I couldn't move at all. He was supposed to be wearing a white garment, but it was already dyed red. His eyebrows were slanted and flying, his lips and face were pale, and his sharp eyes were only hovering on the jade in my hand and mine. He didn't say a word, but I understood him.

"You, what do you want?" I raised the jade of the first quarter moon, I didn't understand, why I asked at the time, and I asked very gently.

He didn't speak, only nodded with difficulty.

I walked up and handed him the jade. He snatched it up quickly and held it in the palm of his hand. I heard a soft crunch in his hand, whether it was the rain hitting the back of his hand or the strong squeezing of his knuckles. I only saw his pursed lips, the protruding green tendons on the back of his palm, how hard he held it, as if he was going to use up all the parts of his body, all his strength! I suddenly felt that he was really not terrible, and now he was a little creature that was injured and in urgent need of protection.

I took another step forward, and he glared at me alertly, clearly unwilling for me to come any closer to him. I hesitated, and then stopped. He had a long scar on the outside of his arm, still bleeding from the rain. "You, you have to hurry up and deal with the wound. I said. His gaze softened slightly, but then there was a ferocity, as if to show the wolf's distrust of man.

I stopped talking, I just wanted to help him up, but as soon as my hand touched his body, a strong force hit me. I fell to the ground, and the umbrella flew, spinning twice in the air, like tears in my eyes, hanging, hanging......

He also seemed to have exhausted the last of his strength and fainted. I finally saw a green flute stuck in his waist, which was half as long as the usual hole flute, and on the flute fell another piece of jade that was the same as the last quarter moon. The rain hit his eyes and beat his hands. His cheeks were full of droplets, sparkling like tears, and his hands were clenched as tightly as his eyes were closed. My green umbrella finally fell to the ground, and my tears fell silently with the rain...... Autumn water and tears, I know those are his tears too......

He fell asleep for a day and a night. When I woke up, there was a look of disbelief, a sense of loss, and a deep sense of sadness. I looked at him and felt so distressed that I just put the medicine into his mouth one by one. He stopped resisting and just closed his eyes.

As the time passed, he also got better little by little, he could barely get out of bed, he could sit next to me and watch me play the piano, my heart was like a deer, the third string on the piano broke, he smiled slightly, and helped me renew it. I ran away with a red face, and in my panic I heard his sigh and played the song "Green Clothes".

"Green clothes, green clothes and yellow clothes. The worries of the heart, the maintenance of it!

Green clothes, green clothes and yellow clothes. The worries of the heart, the death of the heart!"

It was the first time I had heard his voice, like the dull sound of a flute in the twilight. He never spoke, ate very little, and only looked into the distance from time to time, sighing for a long time. Sometimes singing, sometimes laughing, sometimes crying. They don't understand the autumn equinox and white dew, the spring equinox and the rain, why I would bring such a strange person back to Zhuangzi, even I don't understand.

Maybe there are things that it can't explain, or rather, it doesn't need to be explained.

He looked out every day, just like I used to do. So, I came to accompany him every day, felt his melancholy, played the piano with him, listened to him play the flute, we did not speak to each other, and the music had answered for us.

It wasn't until a month later that my brother came back.

I told him everything stupidly, and his face changed instantly, glared at him, and drew his sword. I was taken aback and hurriedly stopped between them and asked why.

My brother's iron-blue face, chapped lips, and deep voice shattered all my illusions. "Y-Do you know who he is?" "I don't know, but I don't care. "I'm going to kill him today no matter what. ”

"You can't!" I was in a hurry, and I said, "I like him, and if you kill him, you will kill me as if you were killing me." ”

My brother looked incredulous, looked at him, then at me, and asked, "Could it be that you and he have already ...... Already ......" I knew what my brother was referring to, blushed and nodded. I don't know why, nothing happened between me and him, but I was willing to ignore his name.

My brother's sword was raised and lowered, and so on and so forth, he wanted to kill me and kill him, because I had lost the face of my family. But he still loved me, and finally he sighed and walked away.

I can't describe how I felt at the time, and I don't know if it was a relief or another cycle of suffering. He sighed and said to me, "Your words, saved him." "At that time, I didn't know that his injuries were more than half healed, and at that time, he had no one in the world who could hurt him again except for the world-renowned Buddha. And of course my brother.

Since then, my brother has never come to see me. He told me that he was what they called the devil. He killed a lot of people, many, many, many, and even he couldn't remember how many people he had killed in the past few months.

I was not surprised, nor was I afraid, for I had already noticed him when I first saw him.

He said that the moment he woke up, he knew that there would be such a day. He didn't want to drag me down, but the injury was too serious, and there was something unresolved in his heart, so he couldn't die easily, so he stayed. He said, "He's sorry for me." I shook my head, and somehow there was no hatred or regret in my heart.

I knew he was leaving.

He asked me to give him a month, and when he was done, he would definitely come back.

I nodded.

A month is a very long time, but for me, it is incomparably long, and in that month, it seems like ten years have passed, and I no longer look like a seventeen-year-old girl.

At that time, the cold dew had passed, and in the blink of an eye, it was frost. I looked at the flowers and trees in the yard, they were still green, but they were no longer green. The petals in my hand were blown by the wind and danced.

I looked at the sky and sighed. The flowers fell to the ground, their eyes raised, and it was the white-clothed man who appeared in front of me.

I was stunned, he was thinner, and his eyes were more melancholy. And he was in front of me, and he knelt before me, and began to weep bitterly. He said he had been entrusted by her. Although the autumn rain had long since stopped, I saw his tears again. I stroked his hair and whispered comfort, like soothing a wounded child.

That night, we toasted to the moon, and he told me all his stories.

I put on a quilt for him who was drunk, and I knew that he would rather be drunk under the bright moon and pine than sleep in the warm pavilion of the greenhouse. I quietly accompanied him, imagining that the woman he liked, she must have a pair of autumn water cut pupils, Chang'e of the Moon Palace, and Xizi of Huansha.

In the following two months, he talked with me about the piano, discussed poetry, and instructed me in martial arts. At that moment, I realized how high his martial arts were. He sorted out all the martial arts that I had passed down from my family and explained them to me in detail. I know he's leaving again.

He finished his speech and sighed. He said that he couldn't let go of that child, and he still wanted to go to Huaxia again and find the end of the world again. I nodded and said, you go, don't let yourself have regrets. He took out the jade flute, took off the lower quarter moon jade pendant from the flute, and handed it to me. My eyes were like a faint mist, on the piece of jade, I smiled, but tears came out of my eyes.

I don't know if I'm in love with him in white, or his crystal clear tears.

But I know that this life and that lonely figure can only be fateful.

But I also know that time like water will sink my heart.

The wind is bleak, the birds are flying, the smoke trees and the clouds and sand.

Perhaps, four years ago, it was already ten years of traces and ten years of heart[2], and one day four years ago, he was still in tears when the autumn rain was sunny.

Shen Suyin's book was written in the 39th year of Wanli, and the night moon is like water, and the wind is clean and autumn.

[1] From the Northern Song Dynasty Su Shi's "Nanxiangzi", the full words are as follows:

"Looking back, the chaos is unstable. I don't see the inhabitants, I only see the city. Who seems to be on the tower on the flat mountain, pavilion. Welcome guests to the west to see off guests.

The return road is breezy and clear. A pillow of cold dreams come true. Tonight, where the residual lights are obliquely illuminated, glowing. When the autumn rain is sunny, the tears are not clear. ”

[2] From the Qing Nalan character "Poppy Beauty", the full words are as follows:

"The silver bed is old with asphalt, and the autumn is swept with powder. The incense picking line is full of money, and it is unspeakable to find Cuiqiao.

The corridor is an inch of lovesickness, and the moon is lonely. The back light and the moon are in the shade, and it has been ten years of traces and ten years of heart. ”

;