A long time ago, although it may have only been a few months ago, but it was a long time ago for me, I watched an interview with Yuki Morikawa, the original singer of "WHITE-ALBUM", with Koki Saku. Miss Morikawa, who is already well-known all over the country, talked about her relationship experience in front of the camera with a little shyness, her boyfriend who has been together since college, her combing with each other after becoming a singer, and the story of the two using every opportunity to clarify their feelings for each other in that era when mobile communication means were still very scarce.

I also remember my evaluation of Ms. Morikawa's experience at the time: a uniquely glorified relationship in the era when there were no mobile phones. If Ms. Morikawa and her boyfriend could know each other's situation in real time through their mobile phones, many unfortunate misunderstandings would not have happened.

However, I also remember the somewhat unpredictable smile that Kogi Senpai-senpai showed after watching that interview.

However, I really want to have this experience with Miss Morikawa!

"This is another ironclad example of whether Kogi Sao's predecessor was an outdated woman in the Showa period!" and I gave this answer.

The senior smiled and didn't speak, so that conversation ended here.

Recalling such a conversation during this period also reminded me of the relationship between Kogi and me.

In this era of such advanced communication facilities, my seniors and I haven't even left each other's email addresses for a while, and apart from not noticing, the two of us are almost enjoying the time when we met by chance in karaoke, with an unexpected time of anticipation.

After having contact information with each other, how much time do you really spend with each other through mobile phones as Sister Yui and her friends do? Obviously, you can ask each other by email if you will go to karaoke the next day, and you can make an appointment with a specific meeting time by email, but the two of us are just like stupid people, obsessed with face-to-face communication, obsessed with accidental surprises.

The same is true of emotional perceptions, which can be communicated through straightforward words, but the dumb riddle and suggestive dialogue fills the lives of the two.

As a result, I realized that the performance of "Morikawa Yuki-style emotional experience" that Kogi Saku's predecessor said.

In that era full of more temptations than now, the possibility of two people's hearts being close together is very small, and everyone and everything around them can tear apart this kind of unstrong love that has been cultivated since their school days, but the two people still try their best to get closer to each other and understand each other, and finally achieve this.

It's actually a miracle that Miss Morikawa talks about this past with a happy expression, and it seems that this is the kind of experience that Kogi Senpai was looking forward to.

So, whether she was intentional or unintentional, whether I actively cooperated or passively accepted, the story of the two of us approaching each other was in full swing.

But perhaps the reason why a miracle is a miracle is that it is not replicable, and at the end of the day, I may have to draw an unsatisfactory end to this story.

The future we look forward to must be carefully maintained, but it seems so weak at all times.

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In artworks, at such critical times, there is usually a more atmospheric weather as the background. For example, the scene where the snow falls and makes people naturally feel a stomachache with the sound of background music, such as the autumn breeze and the heroine and heroine who are shining with tears, make people feel abrupt.

In this sense, today's rare and even strange warm sunshine in winter seems somewhat out of place.

The environment is not suitable, the place and time are the same awkward, and during the lunch break, the stairs outside the third-grade classroom, which seems to not want too many people to know, but it is easy to leak information, is also a choice I have considered.

If you want others to believe this fact, you have to make Kogi Senpai himself believe it.

The senior met me with a surprised expression - this was probably the first time I had taken the initiative to look for her at school. I think she will be able to realize that this time is unusual, but she will not know what I want to say.

In fact, even I don't know how to speak.

Fortunately or unfortunately, for me who is so cramped and uneasy, Kogi Senpai has too many ways to deal with it.

"The third grade is a very strange time period!" Contrary to the usual identity of the school idol,Sitting on the steps of the stairs somewhat casually,Xiao Mu Yu's senior took the initiative to stir up the topic while banging on his lunch box.。

Talking relaxes me and prepares me to say what I want to say, and she knows that.

"Kazuya, do you know? When you reach the third year, it's clear that because you're a candidate, the center should be on the entrance exam for the university, but, many times, that's not the case," looking ahead with a distracted look, the senior stroked the hair around his ear and continued, "It's because in the third grade, many people find that they haven't enjoyed high school life well at all, so they want to do more things while they're in the third year— It's the kind of thing that completes a task, and wants to make up for the high school life and youth you missed - that is, the so-called no regrets, right?"

I think of Minister Iizuka's words before organizing the activities of the Light Music Club, and he seems to mean the same thing.

"But I always think that it really makes sense to be so anxious to deny the previous two years of my life and then make a 'big change' in the third grade?

This is a reasonable statement, but if you say it to those who want to enjoy their youth, it is also meaningless, and the predecessor of Xiao Mu Yu just said a meaningless nonsense.

"Actually, I mean, I've been wondering if there are some things that I'm thinking about or if I'm a little too focused on the fulfillment of my high school life. ”

I suddenly understood what my predecessor meant.

But why? It shouldn't be like this, is it? Obviously, it's supposed to be the opposite, isn't it?

"If Kazuki isn't a complete fool, I think you know what I said at the previous cultural festival, right?"

"Well, that's what I want to say to my seniors today. ”

However, I didn't expect the situation to go in this direction.

"Really, it seems that I have the same idea as Kazuya!"

"So, I'll start with this—"

"-No! Whoever mentions this matter first will have the right to speak first!" However, Senior Kogi quickly interrupted me.

"Seniors should be humble to juniors—"

If you want to make a distinction, I think it would be more reasonable for the junior to respect the wishes of the seniors, right?"

Damn, until this time, he has been eaten to death by Xiao Mu Yu's seniors.

"Of course, what I want to say is that they have done that kind of thing, so that I can overturn what I said in a short time, and I will definitely not believe it, right? In fact, I am also troubled - of course I like Kazuya, but I don't know exactly what kind of liking it is, and to what extent it is!"

Understanding girls' thoughts has never been my specialty, but in this case, I still know the meaning behind the words of Xiao Mu Yu's predecessors.

The seniors were warning me that now, the rights and wrongs around her are a little cumbersome.

This almost habitual protection is inevitable at any given time.

"So, I mean, if Kazuya doesn't know how to react yet, I'll be happy to give you more time, and even, I think you can not take my words to heart and don't feel stressed about that, after all, I did this kind of thing without permission, and it actually bothered you. ”

All along, my relationship with Kogi Senpai was that she proposed her idea, and then I reacted passively, and I was overwhelmed by the various unexpected performances of my seniors - until now.

I did not expect that the predecessors would be so decisive in raising this important issue in the first place.

However, this time was different, and for the first time, I had a chance to catch Kogi Senpai off guard - although this opportunity was a bit bitter.

"On that point, I don't think it's necessary. ”

"Huh?" said Kogi Senpai's surprised expression.

"After that, I thought about it for a long time, and I also liked Kogi Senpai, but, as the senior said, the feelings for the seniors are more respect for the seniors, or the love between men and women, I think, it may be the former. ”

When I said it, I thought it was difficult to speak, so I said it so simply. Although this may not have been the original intention of Kogi So's words, in the direction of inducing me to say what I was going to say, Kogi Sao's senior still achieved great results.

However, the rejection that did not suit my own heart was so uncomfortable, and the feeling of my whole body being tumbling and my body trembling made me stand like a zombie - I believe that if I moved my steps a little, I might stagger and make my seniors aware of the accident

However, even now I am even more embarrassed. However, Kogi Sanpai-senpai didn't seem to be able to perceive my embarrassment.

She stood up as soon as I finished speaking, then sat down quickly, quickly lowered her head, and hid her expression in the shadows, she had not spoken for a long time. The bento box continued to tremble with her knees, and she was grabbed by her senior when she almost fell to the ground.

"Well, is this Kazuya's final answer?"

"Hmm. ”

"It's not because I'm in a hurry, I mean, it's okay to think about it a little more. "The slightly frightened and anxious voice of Xiao Mu Yu's predecessor made my heart twist.

However, I can only go on.

"I think that the time given to me by my predecessors is enough, and I am sorry that I need to think about it for so long. ”

"But, what I said before—"

"—As I said before, I will continue to do it to help my seniors get out of the current situation, and I don't want to see the disguised smiles of my seniors, which is also sincere. ”

"So, Kazuya, what kind of expression do you want to see me now, is it a sincere expression, or is it a fake smile?"

Only this question, I felt, I could not answer.

"I don't have a choice when I answer this at school—" The senior raised her head, although her eyes were a little red, but her expression was as smiling as ever, "Because, at this time, no matter what, there is no way to cry, right?"

Actually, I'm trying to ask why, but if that's the case, wouldn't it seem a little too unyielding? ”

"Senpai-"

"-So, I won't ask," Kogi Senpai turned around and whispered, "but, on the other hand, I won't accept it either." ”

"It's just that I found that for the first time, I couldn't judge the truth of Kazuya's words. ”

Leaving the last sentence, Xiao Mu Yu turned around and left.

I noticed a few classmates nearby who seemed to be shaking their heads and looking at this place.

I was prepared for all the reactions of my seniors, but the last words of my seniors still pierced my heart fiercely.

It was a kind of despair when everything was going well, and when the mind was closest to it, it was forcibly torn apart by an unknown force, but it was powerless to stop it.

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Recently, a wave of comments in the comment area said that I was so tired of watching, to be honest, I was also tired of writing these plots myself.

About the plot,Everyone has repeatedly complained.,Good high school students' emotional lives,Is it so complicated?,Good high school students' scheming,Is there so much?I admit that of course not.,But,In this case,Forcibly inserting a piece of daily life will have a sense of disobedience, right?Of course,The tone of this book has always been like this.,It's a little depressing.,Pretentious.,Everyone is willing to see this.,I think,It shouldn't be that I hate this tone.,If you feel tired of watching.,It still means that it's time to change to the end.。

On the other hand, with the matter of direct doctorate and further academic things on the agenda, I have less and less time to write now, including whether the new pit that I was still preparing with great interest will be opened or not, I have to re-evaluate, how to say, I don't make value judgments about this era of commercialization of otaku writing, but, no matter what, I am already an outdated and outdated author.

Of course,There are two more volumes to end including this one.,You can rest assured.,I won't continue to hang people with this tangled plot.,In addition,If you really can't accept reading chapter by chapter.,I still recommend treating this book as a light novel.,Read it again at the end of each volume.,Maybe the effect will be better.。