Jingwu talked to Xiao Diyuan about the relationship between individuals and all things in the world, the relationship between men and women, the role of setbacks and failures on people, the wisdom of the survival of all things in heaven and earth, advance and retreat, life and death, the way of thinking and wisdom of people from all walks of life, and the essence of Buddhism and Taoism.

It was raining outside, and the others sat under the porch drinking tea and talking quietly, all looking extremely relaxed.

This small inn has been contracted by Xiao Diyuan for a period of one month, so in this month, except for the shopkeeper of the small inn and a few shopkeepers, the rest are Xiao Diyuan and Jingwu's people.

After finishing today's lesson, the shopkeeper served dinner to Jingwu and Xiao Diyuan.

There are a total of eleven dishes, all of which are local farm dishes, with meat and vegetable combinations, spicy and numb, sweet and fragrant.

Since all the dishes were Xiao Diyuan's first taste, he had an excellent appetite today.

Jingwu didn't take off his hat even when he was eating, but he raised the brim of his hat slightly back, so that Xiao Diyuan could see a small rub of his white beard.

Xiao Diyuan smiled and said: "Teacher, although you have emphasized your hideous face several times, in the hearts of students, you always feel that the teacher's face is kind and amiable. ”

Shizugo laughed and said, "Before the burns, the appearance was barely related to kindness and amiability, but after the burns, it was really hideous, and even I didn't dare to look in the mirror." ”

Xiao Diyuan didn't believe it, but he didn't say much.

As soon as the time enters October, the air is cool after the sun sets, but it doesn't matter to a person with a solid body like Xiao Diyuan, so he still only wears one piece of clothing.

And Shizugo doesn't seem to feel cold, and he is also wearing one. Xiao Diyuan was worried that he was cold and reminded him to add clothes, he didn't seem to be very willing, but maybe he couldn't bear to brush Xiao Diyuan's kindness, and finally put the thin coat on his body.

After putting it on, he felt a little too hot, so he took it off and put it back away, saying, "It's not cold yet." ”

Xiao Diyuan smiled, stretched out his hand to pour tea for Jingwu, turned on the light a little more, and said, "Teacher, I have fallen into serious doubts about everything recently, and even many things that I was interested in before are no longer interested in. The other day, I even felt disgusted by what I saw, and I had headaches, listlessness, and great pain. ”

It's true. He used to like to buy a new batch of books on a regular basis, but one day in mid-September, when he entered the bookstore, something happened to him that had never happened before- He had carefully selected ten books, which he knew he would not regret when he bought them, for he had already looked through the contents and knew that there were many things in them that he was worth absorbing and considering, but strangely enough, he hesitated just as he was about to take them to the cash register, and an inexplicable feeling surrounded him, making him inexplicably regret his choice, and he suddenly lost all his thoughts and wanted nothing. At that time, he secretly cursed his hesitation from his heart, because this was really not his usual style, not to mention that he could not afford to buy these ten books, so he took them to the cashier again, getting closer and closer to the cashier, the feeling of 'don't buy' suddenly came again, and at the same time, another voice in his heart said, 'These are the books you like, what does it matter if you buy them', the two voices were tearing at him, making him unable to make up his mind.

At that time, he asked himself repeatedly – did he think it was not worth buying them or did he not want to buy too many books?

He has a large study, so he doesn't have to worry about not being able to fit these books.

As for whether it's worth it or not, the price of each book is not high, and judging by the content inside, it's still worth buying them. Moreover, books can be read again and again, and can even be left to future generations, and it is not a loss to spend this money to buy them.

He obviously understands these truths, but he still hesitates. He couldn't understand why he was so hesitant.

In the end, he didn't buy the ten books and walked out of the bookstore quickly.

After walking out of the bookstore, he suddenly felt much more relaxed.

There was another similar situation - at the end of September, the Shangyi Bureau sent someone to make him autumn clothes, and the palace maid Qingyue, who was responsible for making clothes for him, personally brought ten kinds of fabrics to ask him to choose, he chose a silk material and a fine cotton material, both of which are very comfortable to the touch, and the thickness and color are also what he likes, but just as Qingyue was about to leave, he suddenly regretted it, stopped her, and said: "Forget it, there are still many new clothes in this palace that have not yet been worn, so there is no need to make new ones this autumn." ”

Qingyue was surprised, but she didn't dare to put her beak in her beak, so she had to take the order.

Xiao Diyuan told Jingwu all these things.

After hearing this, Shizugo quipped, "Are you deliberately doing the way of frugality?"

"I don't cut new clothes, but I don't buy those ten books, but not all of them, I've always been willing to invest in self-improvement. Xiao Diyuan said.

Shizugo pondered for a long time and said, "In this way, you do have a little self-doubt as you said, and there must be a reason for this behavior. Or maybe you're more people-oriented than before, and you're starting to look for answers from within yourself, instead of blindly looking outward. If it's the latter, the change is good. ”

As he spoke, Shizugo raised his head slightly, looked at him and said, "Have you been through anything lately?"

Changes in self-awareness generally occur when facing or experiencing something, it is not an easy realization that can occur when the wind is calm, these things can be a person who hears something that stimulates his senses and body and mind, sees a phenomenon or scenery that can give him a sudden revelation, and experiences an event that affects his body and mind.

Xiao Diyuan sighed at Jingwu's clear argument, and pondered for a moment before replying: "I have doubts about my background now. ”

In the past few years, because Xiao Diyuan had never doubted his background, he did not talk about this topic with Jingwu, but since last year, he has begun to doubt, especially this spring Xiao Hong's methods in order to prevent him from seeing Emperor Zhaoguo and the things that Emperor Zhaoguo told him about the three princes of Zhaoguo later, which deepened his doubts about his own background.

.............

Dear friends, a watch is coming. I wrote the last chapter too quickly.,So after revising it, there are still a few typos (I found it when I went back to check this morning.,I was too sleepy last night.,I missed an eye),So I revised it again today.,You might as well go back and look at it when you have time.,Those who have subscribed won't be deducted again.。