Prologue:

"So, Xin, what do you want to do in the future?"

"Probably, it's making a game, writing a script for a game, planning or something?"

"Game..."

“？”

"Oh, no, it's nothing, if it's a letter, it's probably going to be a good story."

"What's the story...,Ah, I don't know about this kind of thing..."

"Oh, don't be modest, I know..."

・・・

・・・

【Jingle bells...

【Click】

Turning off the alarm clock, the exhaustion accumulated from the previous day was still deposited in the body, and the whole body was filled with a strong sense of exhaustion, and a yawn, as a result, just this one action made the brain dizzy. Pen, fun, pavilion www. biquge。 info

'Even if you get some sleep, can't you?'

I scratched my head a little helplessly, but if I had to say it, there was actually nothing I could do.

-- It's a fact that I've stayed up late, and it's obvious that my health is getting worse and worse, and although there is still hope for good recuperation from now on, I don't have that time.

Yes, not that time.

"Is it already this time?"

The time on the alarm clock is 9:20 a.m., which is already very late. Whether it's for a student, or something else.

However, if we take into account that Shin went to bed at seven o'clock, it has only been two and a half hours by now.

Even the bare minimum, four hours of sleep, was not reached.

If you are a slightly smarter person, in order to avoid direct deterioration of your body, the smartest way is to go back to sleep immediately, right?

But, it has been said more than once.

There is no such time...

Whether it's stubborn or stupid, he's like that, there's no way to change it.

The letter walked over to the desk, opened the laptop, and after a short wait on the machine, entered the password, and then, in front of him, there was a desktop that was so messed up that no one but himself could understand it.

Files in txt format are cluttered with all sorts of pictures with strange names, and the programs are cluttered and disorganized, and users can easily store them on their desktops without any management. There are about thirty of them in total, and there are many folders in between. These are so staggered that even the desktop is difficult to distinguish.

“・・・”

There was no embarrassment in the letter, not to mention that he was the only one at the moment, even if he wanted to show this chaotic desktop to others now, in fact, he would not feel any discomfort because of this chaos.

Someone has said that this kind of thing has been said, but the idea of it is 'informal'.

・・・Is that really the case?

At the desk, the tiredness of a short sleep came back to my brain, and my fingers were still a little numb. It's not in very good working condition.

I sat there stunned for three minutes, and as a result, I didn't do anything, just stared at the screen in a daze.

On that desktop, in countless papers, are his countless strange dreams, and the world condensed by his countless ideas.

Each one is completely different and has a unique color in his heart.

However, what they all have in common is that they are not finished.

“・・・”

Yes, not a single one is done.

Whether it's a script or a game, even if it's an ordinary novel text, it's only halfway through the story, or even this one, and it just ends at the beginning.

Irresponsible to the extreme. At the same time, it also means that nothing can be accomplished.

"Forget it, let's open a new pit"

And then, to make matters worse, this guy doesn't have the slightest intention of introspection.

Skillfully creating new documents, the beginning of the story is simply written, flowing smoothly and without the slightest hindrance.

The story is very simple, just think about it.

"Let's write a knight's story, I've written a lot of them before..."

A young man who wants to become a knight, he doesn't want to spend his life ordinarily and embarks on the road of study, going to the royal capital of the empire, hoping to find a teacher who can teach him, and on this road, he has met a lot of partners...

Ordinary, or old-fashioned story development...

You will meet a lot of trustworthy partners, you will encounter happy things, you will encounter tears, you will face choices, and finally hold your head high for the pride that you have persevered to the end...

I'll know her...

【Da--]

Fingers instantly stiffened, and the smooth typing sound stopped instantly.

"Oops, oops..."

With a wry smile, Shin took his hand off the keyboard and scratched his head. On the tired face, an embarrassed smile was revealed again.

"I'm running out of thoughts..."

Save it, and then, exit the document.

So, in a folder on the desktop, another text with a different name was saved. Like countless previous stories, it was sealed in a corner.

Yes, this has been repeated many, many times...

[Wow--]

【Bang Bang

Stand up and walk to the window. I picked up the cigarette that I had put there, but when I put it to my mouth and took out the lighter, it ignited the flames, but I couldn't put it on the cigarette and light it.

“・・・”

Why?

Is it because your hands are shaking because you are tired?

Obviously I want to smoke, and I have decided to learn to smoke countless times, but until now, I have decided on things for a year, but I have failed again.

【Smack...

He took the cigarette from his mouth rudely, and then threw the cigarette case and lighter onto the windowsill along with the cigarette box.

Letter, finally unable to deceive himself, and smiled bitterly.

"Ahh

yes... How can you forget it...

I can't write down the story, I can't learn to smoke, and it sounds like an excuse, but isn't that proof that the figure is still in my heart...

["No, that kind of thing..."

It was as if the girl could be heard smiling and shaking her head, her long hair fluttering slightly, but when she wanted to see it clearly, the figure had already become blurred with the passage of time.

“・・・”

Unconsciously, I can't recall her appearance, only that incomparably good impression remains, and it is still in a place where it keeps beating. Warmth, and do not dissipate for a long time.

"Forget it, this really doesn't look like me..."

Xin waved his hand self-deprecatingly, and regained his spirits.

"What kind of sentimentality is a heartless guy like me..."

Isn't he already aware that he is a bastard, a bastard who has no heart and can't afford to pay his responsibilities?

Passing the buck?

It's really not good...

In that case, it's not even good to call yourself a man, isn't it?

Habitually scratched his head, and then, just as habitually, stopped his hand on a wound that was hidden by his hair.

That is, in his third year of junior high school, the remains of a car accident.

“・・・”

Not only did he take away part of his memory, but she also took away her who was more important than his soul.

In retrospect, my heart still aches, but I can't remember more.

What happened then?

I just remember a bright light... and a warm crimson...

Like a third-rate romance novel, the heroine saves the hero, but in the end, it is not so touching and hopeful.

The heroine is not hospitalized, she has no amnesia, she does not need to wait for someone to wake her up - these are the stories of the faith's experience.

The girl, who can't remember her name, is dead.

Reality, it's not as gentle as in the story...

On that day, how many things the boy lost, probably even he couldn't tell.

How much weight can a heart hold?... Even if you ask this kind of question, it's meaningless...

【Rustle・・・】

I don't want to think about it anymore.

Shin picked up his clothes and quickly changed them.

His face was a little pale, and some of this was due to continuous malnutrition.

The man who lives alone is the most frustrating of this.

If you don't learn how to cook, then you can take it for granted that you're in this situation.

In particular, Shin is a veritable 'unemployed'.

Although I am a college student, in my senior year, I didn't go out to find an internship in a unit, in fact, I have basically equated it with unemployment...

The unemployed vagrant, the unemployed youth, or any other unpleasant name was pressed on the head of the letter, and he was not wronged at all.

Living on the 1,200 yuan a month from his family, he actually understands this very well.

He is not without dreams.

If he could, he would actually like to join a game company or something, make games, write scripts, these are what he wants to do.

But, it can't be helped.

The university he was graduating from was neither a prestigious university, nor was he well-known in the industry – not even the slightest bit of fame, and worse, he had no work to recommend.

- Scripts, games, even if it's just a short and complete project.

None of them.

In his hands, there will always be only a 'stalemate' that cannot be completed and can no longer be written.

How can this be something that I recommend myself?

No game company, or any other organization, doesn't want a waste that can't finish writing a story...

Faith is that kind of waste.

Nowadays, this is no longer something that can be mixed up with the use of 'there must be a road before the car reaches the mountain'.

Even he himself understands that this kind of excuse will only lead to one way in the end.

That's their own graveyard.

There is no hope to bury the end of all dreams.

"I'm really unwilling."

While putting on the trench coat, Shin smiled bitterly, and his heavy face seemed to be dripping with ink.

Yes, he is not reconciled, he does not want to end like this, and in the end he gives up everything and can only do what he does not want to do.

But what can be done?

As early as the third year of junior high school, he knew that there were no miracles in this world.

The so-called miracles are just pranks used to deceive people and make people look forward to them.

【Bang Dong――】

'If you don't work hard, you won't get anything, because even if you work hard, success will always pass by.'

With such an awareness, or self-deprecation. Shin walked out of the rented cottage and closed the door.

'Let's make a final effort...

Walking outside the apartment building where he was renting, the cold wind howled into his collar and made him shiver.

Looking up, heavy clouds obscured the sky.

It's already winter, and although it hasn't snowed yet, it's not far off, right?

The weather is like the mood of faith.

Desperate and cold.