Chapter 4: Shine on My Body

So, what is yourself?

Those who do not see themselves meditate in the realm of no world. Pen, fun, and www.biquge.info

Because there is nothing to think about, because there is nothing to do.

Here, nothing makes sense.

No height, no weight, nothing to be proud of.

You will not be more beautiful than others, nor will you be stronger than others, and even your knowledge will not be meaningful.

If we are fair, equal, and have no differences, and everyone is the same, then is there any point in separating you and me?

Shinji, vaguely, thought so.

Yes, that's pointless.

If you can't tell each other, then you are no different from only one person, even if you embrace the greatest warmth, it is just self-comforting loneliness.

So, go to sleep, and if you're alone, you don't have to worry about others, and if you're alone, you don't know whether you're happy or unhappy -- it's as simple as that. ’

A voice whispered softly in Shinji's ear.

But...

Is that really the case?

No, it shouldn't be like this-

It is precisely because I am alone that I am more eager to get the power of the group, and it is precisely because I am helpless that I hope that everyone can unite, the cold hope of the light on my body will be expelled, and the hesitation on my body needs to be affirmed by others.

Human beings are creatures that cannot survive only by themselves, so they can never be alone.

If you can't recognize each other, don't others exist?

No, that's ridiculous.

Even if you don't open your eyes, the sun will rise, and even if you don't go out of the door, there are people in the world who laugh.

Because I can't do it, I think it's lonely, and I long for the world to be alone, how can I admit such a thing?

But isn't that hard? If you are alone now, and one person is the world, if you have no distinction between each other, won't your wish come true?'

Is it a wish?

Shinji couldn't help but wonder what his wish was.

You want everyone to be happy, to fulfill your wishes, to puff out your chest proudly where you want to be in your place - that's right, right?

'Yes, there is nothing wrong with that, so go to sleep, your dreams will come true, in a world where there is no distinction between each other, that is the best dream'

The voice was still whispering, but Shinji was no longer bewitched by the gentleness.

That's wrong.

Only a child has the right to be willful, and only one person finds happiness in an illusory dream, and it is disgusting to think about it.

Hey, my dreams aren't such fragile and delicate!!

It doesn't matter if it's hard, because happiness is precious only when it's suffering.

It doesn't hurt to be painful, as long as it is the ending that you sincerely yearn for, even if there is a sacrifice, it is brilliant.

If you are a man, there must always be a moment to cry out for your dreams.

How can they give in to you?

I don't even know my name, I don't even dare to reveal my appearance, and I can only use fancy words in my dreams!!

Recognizing this, there is no longer confusion.

- So, Shinji, opened his eyes.

――

Tick ...

The sound of liquid dripping on the ground made people shiver.

"Did you survive?"

Raising his hand, he was not hindered, and turned his head, and the buckles that had fixed his limbs had been removed.

Shinji sat up from the operating table, raised his hand, and pressed his forehead.

The vocal cords have recovered, so I guess it's the knife in the neck...

Unplugging the infusion set in his hand, he jumped out of bed, not as agile as a seven-year-old child.

-- The insect artifacts in the body seem to have merged well with this body, and the body is full of power, like a car with a more powerful engine.

Looking around, it was still the same basement as before, but the bugs were gone.

――Was it sorted out somewhere else?

Shinji couldn't help but think so.

Try to start using your body's magic circuits according to your knowledge and intelligence - after all, if you accept an experiment, there must always be a result.

So, I closed my eyes and began to fantasize, fantasizing about something in my body, being opened.

Kasaki!!

So, there was a non-existent sound in my ears.

In the mind's eye, the sword of light pierced the earth.

It worked.

Shin Er understood this instantly, but he didn't feel much joy in the light.

Ahh

After all, in a place where he couldn't even distinguish between himself, and only relied on dreams to find his true self, he had already obtained the precious gift that had been passed on from his original self.

-- Origin.

Shinji Makiri, no, at least Shinji Makiri, the pride of the soul.

Its origin is 'light'.

Isn't that vulgar? No, Shinji doesn't think so.

It's not funny at all.

The magic circuit in the body has been activated, although there is only one, and it seems that it will always be like this, but as a compensation for the man-made thing, this magic circuit is really amazing.

Raising his hand, he imbued the heat in his heart with the magic in the atmosphere, and the next moment, the light that flashed from the palm of his hand was a restrained light.

Dazzling, like a materialized firework, it lit up the entire basement in a flash, like a bright sun.

This light is probably enough to make people close their eyes and cry in pain, right?

Shinji thought so, but, as the inheritor of the light, he just stared indifferently at the miracle of the light.

- Not enough.

Not bright enough, not hot enough.

If you want to penetrate something called despair, you have to be stronger, stronger, strong enough to break through fate and go to miracles.

'It's not enough, Shinji, you're too weak. ’

The little boy thought silently in the basement.

You have ten years left.

In order to achieve a miracle, burn yourself to ashes...

Yes, at this moment, he was ready to come to his senses.

If you don't have the power to save, you will become stronger, stronger, and stronger.

Until you become the sun that shines on everyone, until you can do whatever you want.

It's not about freedom, it's about salvation.

"Shinji, are you awake already?"

The basement door was pushed open.

Shinji raised his head, extinguished the flame of light in his hand, and his gaze looked up, and in front of the door that reflected the light, he saw the rickety old man.

"Yes, Grandpa"

He nodded.

Dirty Yan, who was a little surprised because Shinji was not afraid, couldn't help but be stunned for a moment.

"Doesn't it hurt?"

As a result, even he didn't expect it, he blurted out such a sentence.

yes - in his opinion, Shinji is just a seven-year-old child, even if he is incredibly mature compared to his peers, but that kind of pain must always leave him with an unhealable mental wound, right?

It was a capital punishment that even adults would never be able to survive.

Shen Er, how did he survive?

"Pain"

Shinji nodded honestly, but then, he laughed.

"But you're right, Grandpa"

"What?"

"If I feel pain, I am alive"

“・・・”

The smile was so dazzling that it made Dirty Yan close his eyes slightly.

Are you still alive?

Dirty study yourself, you are already a person who stands on the boundary between life and death.

With words like this, he has long passed the age where he can say it generously.

Over the course of hundreds of years, he has seen the end of countless people.

"You only have thirty years left to live, Shinji, knowing this, can you still laugh?

"Of course, Grandpa"

"Why?"

"Ahh

Shinji strode forward, stepping on the cold stagnant water, step by step.

"--Thirty years is enough for me-"

He did not hesitate or hesitate in the slightest.

"-If you want to be a hero, you have to pay a price--right?"

At the bottom of the stairs, he smiled again.

Grinning.

"That's what a man is, right?"