March 15, 54 years of Kangxi

I was fortunate enough to set out from China to see India, and when I arrived in Egypt, I could have looked forward to the next destination, looking north across the Red Sea, ancient Babylon?

Although I knew that it was long gone, I was still looking forward to it, and even lamented that my journey through which I could be so complete for an inexplicable reason.

At that time, I stood in the yellow sands of Egypt and sincerely thanked Allah the Almighty, although I never believed it, but since I entered the country, I could not help but follow the customs. I believe that there, there is no point in thanking the Buddha again, after all, I am not a pious layman like Yinzhen, and I can't reach the supreme state left by the Buddha through the intestines of wine and meat.

However, for his sake, I went around in a little circle, and still came back here.

The prosperity of the capital is still there, the street market is constantly shouting, all kinds of commodities are dazzling, rouge pollen, clay figurine, candy figures, jewelry and satin, flowers and herbs, real and false antiques, everything. There is a vague sound of bargaining between hawkers and passers-by, and the real and the real are in full swing.

Listening to those familiar languages, not to mention cordiality, I almost burst into tears to express my love for my motherland. It's really a thousand good things in the outside world, and it's hard to beat the local voice.

There is also the tempting aroma of food and wine wafting from the street restaurants from time to time, which constantly reminds me of where I am.

After a four-year absence, I finally returned here, but I was hidden from the flow of people.

The sedan chair of Prince Yong's mansion was carried by four people on another street, and the familiar silver-topped, yellow-covered and red curtain quickly passed in front of me. I knew who was sitting inside, but I had to turn my back and cover my head and face with the wide hood of my cloak.

Today's capital is full of joy, and there are people everywhere talking about the happy events of Prince Yong's mansion. And I shrank behind Xingjiu, hidden in the corner of the street on the road leading to the palace, watching the non-stop carriages and horses passing by one after another, all rushing to congratulate him.

The royal happy event known to the people of the entire capital, but only I forgot it.

How could I only remember that Kangxi had children after 57 years, but I forgot that the little sister of the Nian family gave birth to a daughter for Yinzhen in the first year of marrying into the palace. I rushed back to the capital, as if I had come to say goodbye, or, at most, one of the most superfluous.

Fortunately, passers-by are only paying attention to those noble royal relatives, but fortunately, I am taking Xingjiu, if I change to a Western appearance like Xiaohe or Yi'an, it will be difficult to hide if I am seen.

Xingjiu's hand was always a few inches behind my elbow, I knew, but stubbornly pretended not to see, lowered my head and insisted on walking back. There was no time to dodge the passers-by who passed by, and they staggered to the side and were firmly held by him.

"Fourth sister-in-law?"

The surprised male voice came not far behind him, followed by a long neighing of the horse, neatly turning over and dismounting. I quickly turned around like an ostrich and buried it in Xingjiu's chest, and I could hear the person walking behind me and tentatively calling the fourth sister-in-law, before I grabbed my throat and whispered in a dumb voice under the brim of my hat, "Which Ni?"

I knew that Yinyu hadn't left yet, he was still standing behind me, and I could feel him looking at me, but he didn't say anything. As if he understood what I meant, Yukihisa put his palm on my shoulder and pulled the brim of his hat that covered my face before whispering to him in Japanese. I still don't understand well, and I don't have the heart to guess, I just hope that he will leave quickly, where he should go, and not entangle with me.

"I'm sorry, I recognized the wrong person, I bothered. There was confusion in Yinyu's voice, and after he finished speaking, he stayed for a while, and Yin's familiar loud urging sounded in the distance before he walked away from behind me.

I seemed to lose my strength in an instant, and I was hugged in front of Xingjiu and put my face on his shoulder, allowing him to hold him and flee quickly. I felt that the warm red sun of the early morning suddenly turned into a cloud, and it was gray and black, and there was no light.

I don't know why I want to come back, isn't it good to travel the world freely, why should I go back at this time when I can go to more places to see more places and see more places and so many unfinished journeys?

Instead of taking me back to the newly purchased house, Yukihisa sent me straight back to the ship. I lay motionless in my cabin again, as if I had returned to the lifeless days on the ship at the end of '52, and no one called me to go out, except for Honghui who came to feed me medicine.

Why was I sick at that time, and how did I get better? I can't remember anymore, it seems that my memory is getting worse and worse, and I can barely remember anything but those beautiful views.

I can still vividly remember the last leg of the journey, when Yinxiang took us to Egypt. When I stepped out of the hatch heel

Yinxiang saw me holding Honghui's hand and standing carefully behind everyone, and laughed unkindly, "Honghui, why did you bring your Eniang out, you should ask Su Changqing to ask gauze to wrap her up, and throw it here is a freshly baked mummy." ”

Those days are still very happy, the sunshine and the sea, the wonderful journey of relatives and friends.

I lay on the bed and thought about it seriously, as if I had returned to the plains of yellow sand with no grass, swimming on the banks of the Nile River at sunset, quiet and beautiful, and the sparkling water surface seemed to be covered with a layer of orange warm golden light.

The mysterious Pyramid of Khufu, with its alluring magical power, has stood tall for thousands of years. There is some kind of power hidden behind the heavy history that makes those of us who look up a little breathless, and even those three well-informed foreign men are as silent and solemn as we are.

And the huge human face without a nose made me completely stop believing the legend that Napoleon ordered the bombardment of Egypt with shells when he invaded it, but there is no longer one. All I can say to those who made up this story is that the human imagination is really limitless, just as amazing as how the people of ancient Egypt built these wonders of the world.

At that time, what did my brother say, why did he come here, it seemed that he wanted to take me to find the footprints of the Nile daughter.

He didn't believe in the Lord of the Rings, but he believed in the daughter of the Nile, and this was to make me happy? I thought I was the girl who loved to read comics when I was a child? All the comic books I read at that time were bought for me by my brother with the money I earned from working and studying.

In fact, in my memory, Carol was not very loving, but it was the cruel and strong Memphis that made me want to stop. Such a king, so spoiled by the legendary daughter of the Nile, how many underage girls are like gods in their hearts, wishing that they themselves would travel to ancient Egypt, incarnate into blonde and blue-eyed beautiful girls, and enjoy his boundless love.

It's just a comic fairy tale, we all know it, but we still can't help but fall into it. Now, I have truly become a crossing woman, and I should be happier when I meet the man I love, but I have lost my happiness.

Yinzhen ...... As soon as I thought of it, my heart hurt like I had been cut by a knife.

If it weren't for you, how could I have come back with a boatload of people who could have gone to the Mediterranean, and even the new ship had been built and docked in Alexandria. Just for you, just for the sake of the agreement between us, I came back without a hitch.

The room was getting dark, and the small window had been replaced by a dim moonlight, and not a single star could be seen. Hearing the soft thud of the hatch, I rolled over and lay down on the bed and poured tears into my pillow, feeling a pain all over my body, as if my bones were about to break knots.

As the hatch opened, a gust of wind blew in, and the evening in the port was still cool as summer approached, but I felt cold to the bone.

"What's wrong? Who are you meeting today? Recognized?"

I was still lying on my stomach, but I heard the voice of Yinxiang, who had moved into the new house with everyone early in the morning.

"No, it's Yinyu and Yinyu, they think they have recognized the wrong person. ”

"It's okay, get up, come back with me. ”

I stubbornly clung to the edge of the bed, and Yinxiang also seemed to have a bull temper, and wanted to arrest me out of the bed.

"Brother!" I couldn't get the strength to do it, so I had no choice but to shout, "You go back, I won't stay on the boat and go anywhere, don't force me." ”

Yinxiang let go of his hands and let me fall back, sitting on the edge of the bed and rubbing my head.

I turned my head to look at him frowning and concerned in the faint moonlight, and I couldn't help whispering about what I had seen and heard on the street at noon, and found that I was much calmer at this time, and I didn't even shed a single tear.

Yinxiang pursed the corners of his lips and looked at me with a smile, his palm stopped before he touched my forehead from the top of his hair, sighed and stood up abruptly and walked out.

I sat up from the bed and reached out to pull it, and was almost carried to the ground by the hem of his coat, so frightened that I hurriedly pressed my dizzy head and asked urgently, "Where are you going?"

Yinxiang stopped, turned his head halfway, and replied in a low voice: "Go find Su Changqing, do you want to go to your house to congratulate you?"

Silently smiled and lay back on the bed, it seems that I am really confused, where else can Yinxiang go at this time.

Even if I forget it, this is a fait accompli, a part of history, didn't I clearly understand it a long time ago, why is it awkward now? If it were in the past, I wouldn't be so sad, for Lan Si, for the Song family and even the two little women who entered the door at the same time, I can face it calmly, why can't I tolerate a Nian's family. It's just that this time is different from the past, we have been separated for so long and so long, Yinzhen, you have asked me so seriously to promise you to live well and wait for the day of reunion.

Today, I'm back......

I remained on the boat, dizzy from the fire, and there was nothing in my ears except the familiar sound of the waves lapping against the hull. It seemed like people always came to see me, but no one spoke to me, and I didn't know who they were. When someone feeds me medicine, I open my mouth to eat it, and when no one disturbs me, I close my eyes and let myself sleep non-stop.

The day I arrived in the capital should have been sunny, although it was close to summer, it was not ridiculously hot, why am I always so cold now? Su Changqing has not practiced medicine for a long time, he must have degraded professionally, and the prescription he prescribed couldn't even cure my ordinary fever and cold.

"Smile, good news for you, you're going to be an aunt again, do you like it? ”

"E-niang, E-niang......"

"When do you want to sleep? It was you who said that you were leaving, and it was you who came back, and you ran around with a boatload of people so willfully, and now you are lying down and not doing anything, why are you so irresponsible? Get up quickly, or I will go to your house and drag the man here, and see if you still sleep." ”

I rubbed my ears helplessly, blocking out a sound that prevented me from continuing to sleep, but I was jerked out of bed.

Yinxiang's face shook back and forth in front of my eyes, and Yan Sù's serious look was terrifying, "Your illness has been cured, don't sleep anymore." Two choices, stay and do what you want, or leave here right away. ”

He looked helpless at my speechlessness, bent over the bed and stared into my eyes, his brows furrowed, "Choose one of the two, now." ”

Looking at the clear sunlight outside the small window, I half-squinted my eyes, and when I spoke, my throat felt like smoke, and I was almost out of breath because of the pain. After getting used to it for a long time, I reluctantly asked, "What time is it today?"

Yinxiang shook his head slightly, sighed and sat on the side of the bed, looked at the hatch and replied, "April twenty-eight." ”

I actually ...... Lay down for more than a month.

helped Yinxiang to the ground, and the coat on his body hung loosely, only for a month, but he lost weight like this. It seems that it really can't work if you only take medicine and don't eat.

Walking slowly to the deck, the breeze blew with a sweltering summer heat, and there was no coolness at all.

Leaning weakly on the ship's pillar, looking up at the blue sky and white clouds, I saw Tongzhou Port again. I'm going to be here three times in and three out? And when is the next time I'm going to come back? Another four years?

The hand hanging from the outside of the ship clenched into a fist, but it still couldn't stop the ring from sliding quickly between the fingers. I looked over and saw only a grain of white falling to the surface of the sea, sinking with the ripples.

"Smile!"

I could clearly hear Yinxiang's stunned screams and the chaotic stampede on the deck, but I didn't have time to answer, and there was no blue water around me. Maybe you never see blue in the sea, just like people are stuck in their feelings and can't see themselves.

Yinxiang next to me pulled my sleeve and grabbed my wrist and pulled it up, before his head surfaced, he had already shouted to me angrily, "You are crazy, and you are afraid that you will not die of illness." ”

A thick rope hung down behind him, and he quickly pulled it, "You go up first, I'll help you find it." ”

Maybe it was the first time I had disobeyed him so much, maybe it was the last time, and I just kept shaking my head until he dragged me to the surface again.

Lost ...... Never found again.

No matter how hard we tried, we couldn't find the pearl with its white glow in the dull sea. Perhaps, it has gone home, to the place where it grows, to the sea, and is unwilling to be with me anymore, to keep my beautiful promise of the hand of the son.

I lay on my back on the deck in prostration, looking at the many faces beside me, familiar and swaying.

Yinxiang was just as wet as I was, squatting next to me and patting my face. Honghui, who is already 18 years old, has almost become a copy of Yinzhen, years of life at sea have made him mature quickly from a boy to a man, at this time half kneeling beside my face anxiously calling Eniang, but I can only see his lips moving, keep moving, can't hear the sound. There are also Xiaoyan, Su Changqing, Yan Yu, and Xiaohe...... Everyone is here, these relatives and friends who have been with me for more than four years and more than a thousand days and nights.

He closed his eyes weakly, cutting off all the eyes of concern, and the tears that he had endured for a long time kept sliding down the corners of his eyes.

Yinzhen, the ring you gave me fell off.

I'm tired, really, I can't find it anymore.